Hands-down, the most fucked up thing I ever saw. (1440 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.34 on 35 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by garudave <misterkick.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2006-11-25 11:43:00 EST
I knew this girl at one time. For the sake of confidentiality (a useless concept in the Uberworld, but anyway), I'll call her my friend's sister. I didn't know her all too well, because she was a bit older than me and she hung out with a bunch of wiggery douches. Anyway, I was left at my friend's house alone one day because his family trusted me (God knows why) and also because his sister was home.
"I'm taking off," she said to me, as I enjoyed a round of Counter-strike on my friend's computer. "Don't go in my room." And then she went in the garage.
Knowing full-well that her car didn't run, I watched out the window to see how she was getting where she was going, except she didn't leave for a good amount of time. Three rounds later, I walked out of my friend's room to explore what was going on.
The dad in the family was an avid hunter. He kept a few racks in his garage, but the best one was a massive moose head. I don't know how many points there were but I reckon he must have brought it down with a howitzer, it was that big.
So imagine my reaction when I find my friend's sister riding the moose head. When I say riding, I mean panties-down trying to get one of the antlers in her mound. I yelled in a high-pitched voice, "WHAT THE FUCK?!" That got her attention.
What do you say at this point? I just stared at her and she stared back at me. Here comes the punchline: after a deep breath, her eyes got wide and she exclaimed in a quick quivering voice, "It was an accident!"
To be sure, I've seen worse things on the internet (shitcity anyone?) but that is by far the weirdest fucking thing I've ever been presented with.
User Reviews
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2007-05-04 00:09:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-11-27 15:34:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HEY ROCKY, WATCH ME PULL A ANTLER OUT OF MY TWAT
Submitted by garudave (user info) at 2006-11-27 13:04:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I try not to let my dick mingle with taxidermy.
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2006-11-27 13:02:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
how long have you been having
these strange delusions?
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-11-27 13:01:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
definitely should have offered assistance.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2006-11-27 07:47:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And you didn't fuck her why?!
Fag?
That's why it disturbed you isn't it? You like men. I would have got a hard on seeing her rubbing her cunt on a moose and just have to have her there and then!
Fag.
Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2006-11-27 00:39:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-11-27 00:35:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 11:48:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
now a crazy girl wants to fuck me up the ass with her strap-on while whipping me on her sex swing. i just don't think that's really my thing...
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it,s pretty fun actually.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-26 18:48:15 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nice lie.
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2006-11-26 14:56:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Only on the internet would someone confess to being aroused by such blatant displays of 'preversion'
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-11-26 08:37:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:31:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
also i should one day post the story of how i found one of the local gutter punks fellating his dog
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I'd enjoy that story quite a bit.
You should have taken pictures, both of you.
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2006-11-26 04:35:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-25 18:39:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that's some accident. She's lucky that horn didn't get in her eye!
Accidents do happen around the house.
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2006-11-26 00:54:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
nothing like a little necro-beastiality to brighten one's day
Submitted by eatyourvitamins (user info) at 2006-11-25 23:57:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Should have shown her your cock.
Submitted by garudave (user info) at 2006-11-25 23:54:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:07:33 (#)
Ranking: -2
I yelled in a high-pitched voice, "WHAT THE FUCK?!"
Are you a man or a moose?
--------------------------------------------
I failed to mention that I have a habit of saying "WHAT THE FUCK?!" in a high-pitched voice when I'm extremely surprised.
I picked it up from a skit by Tenacious D, where they take LSD and trip out. You-tube it, it's good stuff.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:52:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-25 18:39:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that's some accident. She's lucky that horn didn't get in her eye!
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What tells me that Siren has had something similar happen to her?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
also i should one day post the story of how i found one of the local gutter punks fellating his dog
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:28:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
read this first, i'll be back with more in a minute
http://www.ubersite.com/m/89693
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 16:55:54 (#)
Ranking: 0
you are sheltered.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-25 22:07:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I yelled in a high-pitched voice, "WHAT THE FUCK?!"
Are you a man or a moose?
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2006-11-25 19:43:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
um...do you ever sit and wonder why getting plugged by an antler was her FIRST choice...
Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2006-11-25 19:00:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-25 18:39:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that's some accident. She's lucky that horn didn't get in her eye!
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2006-11-25 17:58:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, gold.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 16:55:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you are sheltered.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2006-11-25 16:52:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-25 14:26:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
My dick ripped through my pants after reading this.
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mine did during
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2006-11-25 15:25:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't jump to conclusions. She must have tripped.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2006-11-25 15:11:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Too funny.
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2006-11-25 14:26:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My dick ripped through my pants after reading this.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2006-11-25 13:11:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-11-25 13:02:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
the fuck?
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2006-11-25 12:57:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
...didn't see THAT coming.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2006-11-25 12:15:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Where can I get this woman's phone number?
That goes for your woman too, hidden.
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-11-25 11:54:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAWT!
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2006-11-25 11:48:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i saw a chick shoot a bear out of a tree and then have sex on it's dead body.
my conversation at the bar last night involved many things similar to this story.
now a crazy girl wants to fuck me up the ass with her strap-on while whipping me on her sex swing. i just don't think that's really my thing...