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Welcome.....to the FIFTH DIMENSION!!! (860 hits)

Category: Sports

Rating: 1.9 on 27 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (View user info) at 2006-11-29 21:29:05 EST



It's pretty lame, honestly. Most of the time here is spent getting drunk at the swingsets or throwing poop on strangers. I flunked the final exam to get into the sixth, which means I have to wait an ENTIRE YEAR before I can take it again. You see, there was a costume party up at dotCY4-09's "space" or whatever it's called, and I felt like I had to let off a little steam before the big plunge into my next incarnation, right?

Well, call me a lower life form if you want, but they had shots of Everclear making their way around the table when I appeared. I've done everything twice and then some, so I saddled up and decided to down a few and become one with the alcohol before I could talk myself out of it. Next thing I know, I'm simultaneously taking the final exam as I am in the consciousness of one of the most inebriating beverages in the universe. I fill in all multiple choice answers with "c" and skip over all essay questions, and then realized that I had already flunked the test two years ago but didn't retake the exam due to my crippling addiction to online poker.

Now I don't know yet also know what to do with myself. I fucking hate the color scheme of my uniform, and I refuse to sit through the entire lifespan of the universe one more time with that narrator thinking he's "god" and all that bullshit. You wouldn't believe how boring it is to see a galaxy evolve over billions of years, all the time with the rocks and fusion or whatever......you rarely get to see the good stuff, like when an old lady slips on a patch of ice. Why? "There are no questions on the final regarding the ramifications of an elderly human female losing her balance", I'm told.

SO FUCK IT, I'M NOT ALLOWED TO BE A TOTALLY FULFILLED AND ENLIGHTENED BEING BECAUSE SOMETHING ISN'T ON THE FINAL? LIKE THAT ISN'T IMPORTANT IN THE OVERALL SCHEME OF THINGS? THE AGONY? THE SENSE OF ABSOLUTE DESPAIR IN HAVING TO ASK FOR HELP? WHAT ABOUT WHEN A DOG FUCKS A PIG? HUH? HOW DOES THAT GO OVER IN THE BIG PICTURE IN CREATING A SENSE OF BALANCE? A DOG IS A DOG AND PIGS ARE BACON, AND THAT HAPPENS? I REJECT YOUR FUCKING SYSTEM. I SPIT ON ALL THAT DIMENSIONAL ELITIST PROPOGANDA STANDS ON AND CALL FOUL! I'M DONE WITH YOUR....YOUR PSYCHOBABBLE ONENESS CRAP, AND I'M.AWEE44W3



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jesusknowskarate.GIF (27 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2008-09-14 05:43:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2008-09-14 03:15:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Yo let's stop fucking tip toeing around the fact that this piece of shit is the greatest writer to grace ubersite with his antics. You can fuckin blow me if you agree or even disagree.

Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-08-30 20:11:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

post something you fuck

Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2008-08-19 16:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Get your cunt ass back here this instant.

Submitted by Val (user info) at 2008-04-17 12:38:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i miss yer werdz, come back to the dark side. we have cookies.

Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-03-26 15:41:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

You are funny and need to come back.

Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-02-12 23:47:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

http://www.ubersite.com/m/81126#1747181

Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2007-01-06 23:27:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

it beats NKOS

Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2007-01-06 23:09:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

1
1
333
55555
88888888
1
333
22
1

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-11-30 17:22:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I don't have any idea what the fuck this meant.

+2 FOR YOU!

Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2006-11-30 13:26:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

sounds about right

Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2006-11-30 13:06:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'm gonna give you AIDS SO HARRRRD, Mike.

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-11-30 12:33:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Can I stay in someones yard until I get re-instated? I'll keep your grass nice and short, and my droppings are mashed potatoes with a hint of rosemary. Feed your stoner friends AND have hot chicks pet my wang!

Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:00:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2006-11-30 10:21:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Welcome home.

Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2006-11-30 06:51:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Yay.

Submitted by Wildman (user info) at 2006-11-30 00:07:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

i always give a two for a good moo

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-29 22:31:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Only the new Uberlord could write something like this.

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-11-29 22:19:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -1

Moo?

Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-11-29 22:06:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Nice, actual writing. More than I did.

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:42:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:41:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:37:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

yes

Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:34:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

This was fuckin' great! Maybe the second best take on this whole dumb Welcome... bandwagon.
This one's a little better though: http://www.ubersite.com/m/96309


Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:31:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

and crystal meth.

Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:31:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

wtf is this?

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2006-11-29 21:31:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

might as well face it, i'm addicted to aids.


Alone! I'm alone! I'm a lonely, insignificant speck on a has-been
planet orbited by a cold, indifferent sun!

-- Homer Simpson
El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Homer