The Mystery of horse87 Solved plus a Shlongy cameo to generate hits and NSFW, to generate even more (1073 hits)
Category: Sound & MusicRating: 0.14 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by HotWillie (View user info) at 2006-11-30 11:32:46 EST
I have figured out the mystery of horse87. And some of Jack's accusers have a lot to answer for.
Granted this horse87 sounds a LOT like Jack, responds a LOT like Jack, and it seems quite plausible the same person is writing the reviews, regardless of the user name's original identity.
HOWEVER:
When Jack says he is not horse87, he is telling the truth.
When horse87 says he is not Jack, he is also telling the truth.
And when Method/uberboard questions their veracity, their supposition is also true.
HOW CAN THIS BE?
The key is in the last line of horse87's reply to a joke by Stagger Lee, in which Jack's alleged alter called Stagger a "conflicted individual."
Found here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/96190#2240067
It's so obvious.
Jack suffers from schizophrenia.
Horse87's votes for Jack in UM4 is not cheating.
It is a cry for help.
Dissociative identity disorder is not an affliction with which to be trifled, and Jack needs the sympathy and understanding of the uber community, which is obviously of great comfort to him in his dotage.
He has (somewhat) successfully coped with the delusions of grandeur and the impotency, but a split personality is something which will require the loving care of all of us.
It takes a village to heal an idiot.
He cannot do it alone. He needs the help of many other idiots, and where better to find so many than ubersite?
This is just a theory, you understand. I have not personally examined the subject.
OR HAVE I?
OH MY GOD IM JACK TOO
I AM MCCALLUM
I AM MCCALLUM
I AM SPARTACUS
And now, the most entertaining asshole here (Sorry Bubba, I said ENTERTAINING asshole):
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-05-28 13:53:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
not interested in alter theory/exposure. horrible picture.
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-05-26 19:43:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by EkO (user info) at 2008-01-05 13:27:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-04-18 18:29:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, who can -2 a cameo?
Submitted by horse87 (user info) at 2006-12-01 21:04:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Schizophrenic?
We are not!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-12-01 15:46:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-30 14:37:55 (#)
Ranking: 1
JonnyX was killed in a car crash over Thanksgiving weekend near Oceanside, CA.
-------
jeez, you're pathetic.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-12-01 02:30:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WHOOPS OMG +2 NAME DROP
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-12-01 02:29:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You goatse'ing son of a bitch.
+2 post
-2 goatse
etc
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-11-30 19:02:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
For someone who runs down EVERYONE here, you sure suck at writing...
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2006-11-30 16:07:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by LongestPants (user info) at 2006-11-30 15:54:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jesus. I can never have a goatse-free day.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2006-11-30 15:31:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am the walrus.
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2006-11-30 15:02:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'M SPARTACUS!
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-11-30 14:50:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just got done cleaning my shoes because I saw that picture an hour ago.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2006-11-30 14:40:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
meh
Submitted by wijormiclat (user info) at 2006-11-30 12:57:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DUDE YOU TOTALLY STOLE THAT FROM MY CAMWHORE http://www.ubersite.com/m/96331
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2006-11-30 12:46:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:40:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
Regarding horse87's identity, his name is Robert Paulson.
-----
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0667326/
HE WAS RAPHAEL ON TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES????
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-30 12:17:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:38:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
This would have been a +2 if not for the Goatshlongse at the end...but I just can't give anything with Goatse a rating higher than 0, on principle.
==========================
I understand. Gays in the military, don't ask don't tell, say no more Cap'n.
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:50:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
because it is funny
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:50:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Eat glue. Let me know.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:50:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
For the graphic you sick fuck.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:46:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:44:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, Willie...Can I call you Willie?...
Willie, aren't we ALL McCallum a little bit, deep down inside?
=========================
yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes
WE ARE ALL MCCALLUM
I AM MCCALLUM
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Retard.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, Willie...Can I call you Willie?...
Willie, aren't we ALL McCallum a little bit, deep down inside?
I submit to you that we are.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:41:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I AM MCCALLUM
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:40:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Regarding horse87's identity, his name is Robert Paulson.
Submitted by The_Cyst_Master (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:39:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96331
YES! GOATSE IS BACK!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:38:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're right. Schizophrenia is NOT something to be trifled with.
This would have been a +2 if not for the Goatshlongse at the end...but I just can't give anything with Goatse a rating higher than 0, on principle.
Submitted by EhyehAsherEhyeh (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:38:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
no, i'm horse87.
Submitted by spontaneous (user info) at 2006-11-30 11:36:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
O RLY?