Tatai - Part 3 - Bustin' shit up... (400 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 2 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SlowlyRotting (View user info) at 2006-12-08 10:30:08 EST
Part 1 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/96564
Part 2 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/96621
I had no idea what to do. I minimized the image and glanced around, eyes moving around like Pruitt Taylor Vince. My saliva seemed to take on the consistency of school glue, but unlike Elmer's, it was impossible to swallow. It felt as though ice water were coursing through the veins in my neck, and the hair all over my body stood on end.
Positioning myself in front of the monitor to block anyone who might come up behind me from seeing, I clicked on the tab at the bottom of my screen to bring the image back up. The striped design of the boxers I wore today was visible, and it was clear that this had been taken today. My manhood was enlarged and misshapen by the fish-eye lens of the camera. This could only have been taken from the restroom, and the angle of the shot appears to be practically head on. The only place this vantage point could be achieved from was the motion sensor of the urinal, where the flashing green light was coming from.
I deleted the image and cleared out my recycle bin. If someone did find this, I certainly didn't want them to think I was downloading gay porn. I opened back up internet explorer and googled the word "tatai". An hour of research left me as confused as when I started.
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As I was reading up on the folklore of the tatai, I realized that I had been mispronouncing it in my head. It wasn't "tay tie", it was "tuh tie". I remembered my grandmother telling me about the tatais when I was younger. She described them as little monsters that lived in rooms that grown-ups slept in, and would eat little children who entered the room without permission. I hadn't thought about that in years, shit, decades. I probably blocked it out, my crazy old granny scaring the shit out of me when I was too young to comprehend metaphors.
So whoever sent me this picture likes to think of himself as a little monster. A little fairy is more like it, fucking perverted punk-ass taking pictures of man-meat in the bathroom from what can only be some kind of IP camera or something.
The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. Any shred of fear I might have once had was stripped away like the panties of a drunk Kappa-Delta at a Mardi Gras ball.
I stuck my head over the cube wall.
"Joanne, anybody around here go by the nickname tatai?"
She laughed with that thick New Orleans accent that sounds so much like Boston.
"That's a strange name. Tatai? Hehehe."
I sat back down and pulled up my Lotus Notes again:
MARK,
IS THERE ANYONE WITH THE USERID "TATAI" ON THE NETWORK THAT YOU KNOW OF? I THINK THEY MAY HAVE ACCIDENTLY EMAILED ME SOMETHING THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO GO TO ANOTHER USER.
THANKS,
RICK
I forced myself to go about business again, telling myself that Mark would figure it out and I'd confront the faggot myself.
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The dream came back that night, but this time I knew what the little green flash was. A tiny little camera, green tinted flash, immortalizing my naked body into thousands of little jpegs, eventually filling up the whole server and causing a huge crash. Eventually there was nowhere left to run, and the tatai caught up to me. I woke up just before his ginsu teeth tore my face apart.
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Friday morning was a casual dress day, so I came in with jeans and a long-sleeved tee shirt with the old USL Ragin' Cajuns logo on it. The university had since been renamed "UL Lafayette", but I'd grown up calling it USL and would probably always think of it that way.
I logged into my computer and found a reply from Mark:
RICK,
NEVER HEARD OF HIM.
-MT
That was enough to kill my hopes that I'd figure this guy out and find him before the weekend. I got up from my desk and headed back outside to my white 9-3 and popped the trunk.
I reached into the small tool kit in the back and pulled out a hammer. I tucked it into the front of my jeans and closed the trunk, heading back into the office.
I walked straight into the bathroom, and headed right to the stall. The green light was flashing.
Bending over, looking right at the tinted window, I said, "You're a little pussy. If I find out who you are, I'm going to rip off your balls." With that, I lifted the hammer out of my jeans and swung it right at the window. With a loud crack, the plastic/glass hybrid broke open and let out a spark. The green light was gone. I swung again, and this time a larger spark erupted into a small pillar of smoke.
The urinal began flushing repeatedly. I took the opportunity to relieve myself and headed back to my desk, tossing the hammer into one of my file drawers. I felt much better about everything.
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My weekend was great. I got to visit with family I hadn't seen in years. My wife showed off her expanding belly to everyone, and plans were made for baby showers and birthday parties and all that stuff that girls go cuckoo over.
I didn't mention the 'camera in the bathroom' incident to anyone, although I did have half a mind to sue the company and retire at the glorious age of twenty-five.
My dreams were green light free that weekend, and when I walked in the door of the office Monday morning, I felt refreshed and rested.
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The receptionist gave me a funny look when I walked in, and she looked around before saying to me in a hushed tone "Mr. Thibeaux wants to see you!"
The thought of my penis' mugshot making it's way around the office was my first instinct, until I remembered about the damage I'd done in the bathroom. I was actually relieved until I realized that in order to prove my claim, I'd have to show him the picture of my green-tinted penis.
I decided to wait and see how things went before saying anything.
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"Rick!"
Before I'd even gotten a chance to enter his office on my own accord, I was already being summoned.
I walked in and sat right down. He eyes me the whole time with suspicion.
"Rick. What's going on bud?"
"Not a whole lot. You wanted to see me?" I tried to keep my voice as steady as possible, at least until I could see where this was headed.
"Anybody been giving you a hard time or anything?"
"Uh... no. Everything's been going pretty good." I could feel myself digging deeper and deeper into a hole, and as much as I wanted to tell him what I'd done and just get it over with, I really did not want a picture of my cock being planted all over the internet as 'evidence' in a criminal destruction case.
"Well, what do you make of your desk??" His voice lifted and almost cracked.
"My desk?" I stood up and looked out through the window. My computer and monitor had been smashed, my phone thrown on the ground and crushed. All the product catalogs ripped to shreds and spread out across the floor of my cube. The pictures of my wife broken and thrown down as well.
"What?" I walked out and approached my cube completely baffled. Mark followed me.
"Bud, the police are already on their way, but I wanted to be sure you didn't do this yourself for some crazy reason. There was a hammer on the desk, it must have been used to do this. It's in my office."
"There was a hammer missing out of my trunk Friday!" I lied. I silently congratulated myself on a killer move. It took everything to hide the smile that was fighting its way onto my face.
"I might get this whole thing taken care of after all," I thought.
Mark put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed. "Don't worry bud, we'll get to the bottom of this."
User Reviews
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2006-12-10 16:46:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
NIce
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-12-10 16:43:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Brandnamecommercial (user info) at 2006-12-10 16:15:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-12-08 23:54:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I look forward to reading the first two parts.
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2006-12-08 18:30:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2006-12-08 11:20:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't get to the bottom of this too soon though, cause I like reading it.
_________________
A-men, brother! Or sister, seeing as I'm not the sexist type and all.
Submitted by Tyrell (user info) at 2006-12-08 16:07:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Tyrell (user info) at 2006-12-08 15:46:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm comin for you beau. ima gonna give you the suck - uh, I mean - beating of yo life!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-12-08 15:27:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2006-12-08 13:00:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2006-12-08 11:20:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't get to the bottom of this too soon though, cause I like reading it.