PawPaw kicks ass. (although the picture, which proves it, will obviously not work) (522 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.72 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SlowlyRotting (View user info) at 2006-12-13 16:42:00 EST
"In order for you to understand why I did what I did, you need to know something."
"I've been a fighter all my life. Throwing hands comes as natural to me as breathing, and mental toughness is my second strongest trait. I have never willingly backed down from a challenge, and to this day I still yearn to fight the battles that no one else wants to fight."
"But there is one man that makes me look like a pussy in comparison, and he can't even get into a boxing ring: His name is John, and he's my pawpaw."
"It was 1940 when the first child of a prominent pharmacist in the small town of New Iberia, Louisiana was born. Eventually totaling 4 besides himself, his brothers and sisters often looked to him when things got tough. Although he just might have been the smartest person in the whole city, he was as tough as the cock-strong farm boys who hung out by the jukebox in his father's drug store."
"He grew up to be a big man, standing over 6' 2" in height, and when high school rolled around he easily took a first string spot on the football team. He partied hard in the days when you didn't need ID to buy beer, yet he still excelled in school. People who knew him in those days described him as having movie-star good looks, even those who'd never met him had heard of him. He was the crown prince of the little farm town on the bayou."
"He fell in love with the daughter of a warship builder, and it wasn't long before they were married and expecting a child. John sacrificed to provide for his family, taking a job like so many others from his hometown working under the hot Louisiana sun in the petroleum industry. The long hours and deadly conditions didn't faze him, but he yearned for his family to have a better life."
"He saved up enough to go back to school, and he enrolled in Northeastern Louisiana University, nowadays known as UL Monroe, where he followed in his father's footsteps and studied the ancient art of alchemy. He couldn't even afford textbooks, so he had to memorize lectures in class just to be able to pass his tests, yet he still aced his courses."
"He sent what little money he earned to his wife & baby daughter back home, while he himself rented a cramped room from the TKE fraternity under the university's stadium. He was such a friendly guy, the brothers offered to let him become a member for free, but he declined."
"Finally he graduated, a doctor of pharmacy, and was among the top in his class. He moved back home, and eventually, to the growing city of Lafayette. He made a good living and bought a house for his growing daughter and newborn son. He even offered his services to the United States military when the war started, but in those days they didn't want to enlist a grown man with a wife and two kids."
"So, he sat the war out and kept the people healthy. His kids got older and his friends multiplied. He was a master fisherman, he could kill a buck with a bow and arrow, and he could build practically anything out of common household items. His strength was like a bull, and his wisdom unmatched. But, he was too adventurous for his own good."
"In 1975 he bought a dirtbike for his daughter who raced in the 'Powder Puff' girl's racing league, and modified it for a better ride and more power. After a race one afternoon, he decided to take it for a spin around the track, and he put his large muscular frame on the small bike and took off."
"People who saw it said that he flew over 30 feet in the air."
"He hit the ground and was instantly paralyzed. He was rushed to the hospital and spent weeks recuperating, but he would never fully recover."
"He had lost the ability to fully control all four of his limbs, and the doctors didn't believe he would ever walk again. But despite the odds, John fought through the pain and frustration and taught himself how to get by. He learned to walk again, even without feeling in his lower body. He learned to use his arms and hands, and even gained enough small-motor function to go back to work, full time. He never accepted a disability check."
"Crippled for life at the age of 35, John spent the next 27 years standing all day, walking back and forth between the small aisles to fetch and mix medications for sick & suffering people. Despite living in pain every day of his life, and working with his hands on prescription pills every day, he never took medication for his pain. He just learned to live with it."
"He dedicated his life to the welfare of others, not only his family but all of his customers. He was more than just a pharmacist. He could diagnose as well as a doctor, and he saved plenty of people time and money by recommending over the counter medications for common illnesses."
"In his free time, he learned the ins and outs of computers long before they became mainstream. He learned programming and wrote a shareware program that saw mild success across the whole country, becoming one of the very first label maker programs. He stayed current despite his loyalty to the Commodore 64 and Amiga computers, and eventually mastered the PC and Windows."
"Both of his children grew up and had kids of their own, yet he continued to financially support them when they needed it. He still put together the toys that needed assembling for Christmas. He still got down on his hands and knees and taught his grandkids how to change the oil in their cars. He even changed the brakes out on his van by himself, something that most people would have left for a mechanic. He kept his muscles strong by working out, when most people in his condition would have sat in a wheelchair and expected to be waited on."
"He once told me "I never really learned how to walk again, I just learned how to perpetually fall and catch myself." I could tell by the grimace of pain on his face with each step he took that he was telling the truth. His life was an uphill battle, yet like a steam train, he just kept going."
"He began participating more and more in dog-fighting simulators on the internet, and met other people from around the globe who shared his love for flying. If his Fighter Duel stats meant anything, the US had passed on a potential combat ace."
"But the pain continued to get worse, and as time went by, John lost more and more function. He was having to take more and more time off from work, and spend less and less time in front of a computer. Eventually he had to go back to the hospital."
"In 2002 it was discovered that he had spinal problems, and he underwent a cervical laminectomy where a portion of his upper vertebrae was removed. He recovered from his surgery better than anyone expected, but he could no longer physically stand all day and continue doing his job. He retired at the age of 62."
"To this day, John still does more work than most able-bodied men his age. At 66, he still mows his own lawn, builds & repairs furniture and other things, keeps his own network of computers, and designs graphics for a local small video production company."
"If there is one person in my life that I can always look up to, it's pawpaw."
"And that's the reason why, officer, when I saw that lazy big-assed black bitch park in a handicapped spot just because she's fat, I took that aluminum bat and beat the living shit out of her and her welfare-raised gangster ghetto kids."
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2006-12-14 16:23:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by beauxjizzle (user info) at 2006-12-14 09:31:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
statement: "the last line did nothing for the story"
correction: ***this would not be an ubersite post without at least 3 of the following:
a) rape
b) political ranting
c) poorly executed MSPaint drawing
d) making fun of religious people
e) shitty writing
f) racist remarks
I already had the C & E but I needed a third...
Submitted by littledan (user info) at 2006-12-13 23:11:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-12-13 21:34:38 (#)
Ranking: 1
You don't need all those quotation marks, you know.
Good story, but I thought the ending would have been more effective without the racial element. Seemed unnecessary to me.
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I never noticed the quotation marks until I read this comment. But I agree, the last line was useless.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-12-13 21:35:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
1.5
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-12-13 21:34:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
You don't need all those quotation marks, you know.
Good story, but I thought the ending would have been more effective without the racial element. Seemed unnecessary to me.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-12-13 20:50:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good story, great ending.
Submitted by swimmingbirdblue (user info) at 2006-12-13 20:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2006-12-13 18:19:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good tale.
Submitted by IntangibleHands (user info) at 2006-12-13 18:11:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.pawpaw.net
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-12-13 17:05:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahah.
What the hell -- have a two.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-12-13 16:44:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
UBER LIVES
Submitted by beauxjizzle (user info) at 2006-12-13 16:42:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
oh shit i was wrong...