Whats cooking? The Great Uber Cookbook! (576 hits)
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Submitted by Beer_bong (View user info) at 2006-12-15 08:39:11 EST
Here's a little something to help your Friday. I personally tested each of these recipes over the last few days and they've all turned out great. My roomates love you all.
Thank you to everyone who submitted a recipe. Those of you who didn't, what the fuck happened?
Snackies
Blinkish's Nacho Cheese Antijitos
1/2 cup grated marble cheese
4 big flat breads, spinach flavor is good, but cheese or salsa works too
1/2 cup bean dip
1/2 cup nacho cheese dip (like tostitos)
a few green onions and a few jalopenos
Spread about 1/4 cup of each bean dip, cheese and nacho dip on each tortilla. Add green onions and jalopenos to taste. Wrap tightly and cut into slices (should have like little circles). put the circles on their sides on a cookie sheet. Bake for 10 minutes at 350.
dip in sour cream and or salsa.
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Amontillado's Peanut Butter Play Dough
Giant glob of peanut butter- 1/3 of the jar should do
1 or so cups of dry milk
1/4 cup honey
Mix until you find the right consistency, I usually do this from memory so I don't know exactly how much of everything to add. Dry milk should make the peanut butter no longer sticky and they have to be mixed really well. Honey is just for added flavor
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Breakfast
Siren's Buttermilk / Buckwheat Pancakes
1 3/4 c buttermilk (You can add a tbls of vinegar to regular milk, stir tocurdle the milk as a substitute)
1 eggMeasure milk into a two cup pitcher. Add egg and mix until blended.
1 1/2 c flour (for buckwheat cakes, use 3/4 c reg. flour and 3/4 c buckwheatflour)1 tbls sugar3/4 tsp salt1 1/2 tsp baking powder1/2 tsp baking soda2 tbls melted butterDump all dry ingredients into bowl.
Pour in milk mixture.
Stir well but do not over stir because it will make the cakes chewy and tough.. You want somelumps.
Heat griddle or skillet with just a touch of oil. Cast iron works great ifit is well seasoned. When a drop of water dances on the griddle, it's ready for the cake batter.
Spoon about 1/4 c batter onto griddle. Don't flip until most of the bubblesrise to the top and break. Flip.
The second side is done when you lift anedge and see the cake is browned to your liking. I tend to pat the cake with
the turner to see if it is firm and not squishy.
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Side Dishes
Amontillado's Bourbon Pecan Mashed Sweet Potatoes
3 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into chunks
3 tablespoons butter, cut into small pieces
1/2 cup chopped pecans, a couple of handfuls
3 tablespoons brown sugar
2 ounces bourbon
1/2 cup orange juice
1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1/2 jar marshmallow fluff
Salt and pepper. Bring a medium pot of water to a boil. Add sweet potatoes and cook 12 to 15 minutes until very tender. Drain sweet potatoes in a colander. Return pan to medium heat. Add butter to the pan. When butter melts, add nuts and toast for 2 minutes. Add sugar and let it bubble. Add bourbon and cook out alcohol, 1 minute. Add orange juice and the cooked sweet potatoes. Mash and season the sweet potatoes with nutmeg, add some marshmallow fluff to the top.
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Maiorano84's Mom's Potato Salad
Ingredients:
1 1/2 lbs. white potatos
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1/2 onion (chopped)
1 celery (chopped)
2 dill pickles (chopped)
2-3 hard-boiled eggs (sliced)
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
1 tsp. parsley
1/4 tsp. dill weed
Milk
Instructions:
1. Boil white potatos whole in salted water for 20 minutes
2. Rinse potatos, allow them to cool, and then slice into quarters
3. Add Onion, celery, pickles, and eggs
4. Add salt, pepper, parsley, and dill weed
5. Add mayonnaise and a dash of milk
6. Stir until ingredients are thoroughly mixed.
7. Serve
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Dinner
Siren's Best Fucking Spaghetti Sauce
Brown 1lb ground round (not ground chuck)Finely dice one med onion. Add to burger and cook until it looks
translucent.
Mince one large clove garlic. Add to burger.
Add 2 cans (I think they're about 18 oz cans) Contadina tomato sauce (Try tofind the Italian style)
Add 2 cans Contadina tomato paste and two of this size can water.
Stir. Add 1 tsp salt, couple shakes pepper,1 tbls basil, 1 tbls oregano, dash of thyme if you have it
Cook, covered, until thick. Or try putting all the stuff in your crock potand let it go for 5-6 hours (or what is recommended in your book).
Dat's about it. Though lately I've been doing 1/2 burger and 1/2 hot Italiansausage. Gives it a real spark.Anyway, taste and adjust salt/pepper.
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Beer_bong's Chili con badass
1 Big White Onion
2 tbsp Peanut Oil
2lb Ground Pork
2cups Stewed Tomatos (One can)
1 1/2 Cups tomato sauce
2 tsp molasses
1 tbsp cumin
1 tbsp paprika
1 can of beer
4 crushed garlic cloves
2 whole Habanero Peppers
2 tbsp cayenne pepper
1 pint of Tequila
1 cup cooked black beans (Canned will work, drain it first)
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
Saute the onion and Garlic in the oil. Add the meat and brown it. Add the rest of the ingredients except tequila. Cover and let it cook for at least 2 hours.
Before Serving pour a shot of Tequila over each bowl. Garnish with shredded cheddar cheese and a whole Jalapeno.
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Deserts
Siren's Kentucky Butter Rum Cake
1 c butter or marg, softened
2 c sugar
4 eggs
3 c flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
2 tsp vanilla
1 c buttermilk or sour milk (substitute- add 1 tbs vinegar to 1 c reg milk--do not use skim milk)
Preheat oven to 325°.
In large bowl, cream butter. Gradually add sugar, beating until light and fluffy. Add eggs, beat well. Add remaining ingredients. Blend at low speed until moistened; beat 2 minutes at meium speed, scraping sides down occasionally.
Pour batter into a generously greased (no flour) Bundt or angel food cake pan (or two 9X5 loaf pans). Bake 60-65 minutes or until top springs back when lightly touched.
Butter sauce
1 c sugar
1/4 c water
1/2 c butter
1 tbs rum flavoring
Heat water, butter and sugar together until butter is melted. Add flavoring.
When cake is fresh from the oven, pierce with a wooden skewer (skinny skewer) and spoon sauce over cake allowing it to penetrate before adding more. Save some sauce for after cake is cool.
Once cool, remove cake from pan and invert onto plate. Skewer again from the top down and spoon more sauce over the top. I like to make extra sauce to sprinkle on each slice of cake as I serve, too
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JMG114's Chai Berry Pies
INGREDIENTS:
1 box of Nilla Wafers (or Vienna Fingers)
1 stick of butter
2 pints of blackberries/blueberries/raspberries (any one or mixture thereof)
0.5 teaspoon nutmeg
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 chai tea bag
1-2 cups of sugar
1.5 packets of gelatin (~0.37oz)
Pie shell (ready made or from scratch. I usually buy 'em ready made. Also, I recommend the Nilla Wafers crust.)
DIRECTIONS:
Heat oven to ~350
Mix berries and sugar (amount dependent on personal taste) in a bowl until well mixed.
Add nutmeg, cinnamon, and contents of chai tea bag. Mix.
Add gelatin. Mix.
Pour contents of bowl into pie shell.
Crumble Nilla Wafers (or Vienna Fingers) very well.
Melt butter over the stove.
Pour melted butter over the crumbled cookies. Mix well.
Spoon butter/cookie combo so that it completely covers the berry mixture in the pie shell. That's the upper crust.
Put it into the oven for 15-20 min (or until cookies turn a golden brown)
Yay pie!
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Beer_bong's Tiramisu
Ingredients
ESPRESSO OR STRONG COFFEE, 2 1/2 cups, cooled
COFFEE LIQUEUR, 1-1/2 cups
LADYFINGERS, 2 packages (about 70 i think)
EGGS, 10 separated
SUGAR. 1-3/4 cups
VANILLA, 1-1/2 tsp
MASCARPONE CHEESE, 1-1/2 lbs
SEMISWEET CHOCOLATE CHIPS, 1 cup (8 ounces) finely chopped
SWEET COCOA POWDER, 1/2 cup
Mix the coffee and liqueur in a large bowl.
Dip in the ladyfingers in batches. Don't leave them in for too long.
Beat the egg yolks with half of the sugar until the mixture is thick enough to form a long ribbon when you lift the beaters.*
Add the vanilla and mascarpone, and beat for 2 to 3 minutes. Set aside.
Beat the egg whites, adding the remaining sugar a little at a time, until they form stiff peaks and have a glossy sheen, about 4 minutes.
Fold the egg whites into the mascarpone mixture until it is all the same color.
Gently fold in the chocolate.
In a 9xl7-inch glass baking dish, assemble the dessert: Layer the bottom of the pan with the ladyfingers, and top with a layer of the mascarpone mixture.
Repeat with another layer of ladyfingers and a layer of the mascarpone mixture
With a flour sifter, sprinkle a thin layer of sweet cocoa powder over the top.
Refrigerate for at least 5 hours, or preferably overnight.
Eat it and then change your underwear.
Bon Appetit!!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2006-12-16 05:11:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
then you shoulda gotten my 2 recipes sent wed night
ill resend i guess, perhapse they are still saved on the puter in the other building
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2006-12-16 04:58:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Its sir.beer.bong rather than sirbeerbong.
sir.beer.bong.at.gmail.com
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-12-16 03:51:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2006-12-15 11:35:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate cooking. I hate that I hate it... I wish I liked it.
I might like it if I were good at it.
Just last night I spent HOURS making a pot-roast. It looked so good, tender, etc... but god damn if it didn't have waaaaaaaaaay too much salt.
So I give up.
********
Many pot roast recipes call for 3 to 4 pounds of meat and one-half teaspoon of salt. If you added more or used beef broth/bullion, that's the problem. I never add salt because if you get too much, it's fucked up. The diners can always add their own at the table.
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2006-12-16 01:48:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i sent but perhapse i misinterpreted the email... is it sirbeerbong as one word? or is it actually sir.beer.bong?
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2006-12-16 00:35:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Corn_nugget, if you want some help I'll happily give you a few tips. I have quite a few recipes, most of them are very simple.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2006-12-16 00:31:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I put in all the recipes I received. If you submitted something and it's not there, I didn't get it.
Feel free to submit recipes for The Great Uber Cookbook Chapter 2, to sir.beer.bong.at.gmail.com
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2006-12-16 00:27:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-12-15 22:58:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Great sounding food in a great post. I'll pull out some of the old lady's recipe
box.
I think we should publish it and use the proceeds to hire a hit man to kill
Sicosemen. What a fucking asshole.
-----------------------------
I was scrolling up from the bottom reading all the recipes and then I came to this - made me laugh
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2006-12-15 22:58:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great sounding food in a great post. I'll pull out some of the old lady's recipe
box.
I think we should publish it and use the proceeds to hire a hit man to kill
Sicosemen. What a fucking asshole.
Submitted by matrix2681 (user info) at 2006-12-15 22:40:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Where's my orange chicken recipe, fool?
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-12-15 21:48:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-12-15 14:05:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Siren, baby, no mushrooms in the spagetti sauce? And only one clove of garlic?
This post is a pretty cool idea.
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You can add whatever veggies/spices you like. Sure, mushrooms are grand. And I often add an extra clove or 2 to the mix. The base is what makes it, but add what you're accustom to. This is just the plain recipe, straight from my mamma's secret recipe book.
YOU PEOPLE DON"T KNOW HOW LUCKY YOU ARE TO HAVE THESE RECIPES.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2006-12-15 21:39:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ooh, aren't these interesting... I'll be trying these out. Even the ones in the reviews. It's like baking_lady without the alter after taste.
Chai berry pie sounds awesome. They all sound awesome.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2006-12-15 19:15:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
how the fuck did I miss out on my recipies getting in this thing??
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2006-12-15 19:13:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-12-15 14:07:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
1 Part Who gives a fuck?
1 Part Microwave Meals
3 Parts I'm a WOP and don't use cans for spaghetti sauce
2 Parts Yawn
===========
Mix them up, toss my salad, and Voila! You just made a boring post.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2006-12-15 14:05:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Siren, baby, no mushrooms in the spagetti sauce? And only one clove of garlic?
This post is a pretty cool idea.
Submitted by jade_digitalmedia (user info) at 2006-12-15 13:57:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh and i make my own pie filling for the apple lasagne recipe.
8 gala apples
1 stick of butter
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 cup of water
add all and heat on medium until it resembles pie filling, add water as needed.
8> jade
Submitted by jade_digitalmedia (user info) at 2006-12-15 13:47:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
APPLE LASAGNE
INGREDIENTS
2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
1 cup ricotta cheese
1 egg
1/4 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon almond extract
2 (21 ounce) cans apple pie filling
8 lasagne noodles, cooked and drained
6 tablespoons all-purpose flour
6 tablespoons packed brown sugar
1/4 cup quick cooking oats
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 pinch ground nutmeg
3 tablespoons butter
1 cup sour cream
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
1 cup sliced almonds
Directions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Combine Cheddar cheese, ricotta cheese, egg, white sugar, and almond extract in a medium bowl. Blend well. Spread one can apple pie filling over the bottom of a greased 9x13 inch pan. Layer with half of the noodles, and then the cheese mixture. Layer again with remaining noodles, and the second can of pie filling.
Combine flour, 6 tablespoons brown sugar, oats, cinnamon, and nutmeg in a small bowl. Cut in butter until crumbly. Sprinkle over top.
Sprinkle on Almonds.
Bake in preheated oven for 45 minutes. Cool for 15 minutes.
This recipe is one of those you like it or hate it recipes. Personally its one of my favories!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2006-12-15 12:51:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't you get my mac 'n' cheese recipe?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2006-12-15 11:35:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate cooking. I hate that I hate it... I wish I liked it.
I might like it if I were good at it.
Just last night I spent HOURS making a pot-roast. It looked so good, tender, etc... but god damn if it didn't have waaaaaaaaaay too much salt.
So I give up.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-12-15 10:36:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Where the fuck is "Shlongy's Shit Sandwich"???
You want people to READ this book, don't you?
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2006-12-15 10:20:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
A nice assortment of recipes.
I'm surprised no one submitted their recipes for "special sauce" or "Cream of Sum Yun Gai," though.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2006-12-15 10:09:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The easiest way to make pizza dough is to toss 4.5 cups of four, 1 envelop of dry yeast, .5 tsp salt, and 1.25 cups of hot water into a bread machine set on the dough setting. Then when the little bell rings you dump it all onto a cookie sheet sprayed with cooking oil and ignore it for about 20 minutes until the dough relaxes. Then spread it out, cover it with whatever you are planning to cover it with, and cook it at 500°F (260° Canadian) for 10-12 minutes.
Where I live, it's actually faster than ordering one.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-12-15 08:52:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a drink recipe for you. Best way think for a cold night ever, in my humble opinion. There's a chance your familiar with it.
Snowplow
Hot Chocolate- Maximize the goodness with Godiva, but do what you will. Swiss Miss is fine.
Bailey's Irish and Cream Liquor
Malibu Coconut Rum
Creme de Cacao Liqueur(DeKuyper is good)
Whipped Cream
Cinnamon and/or brown sugar
Make the hot chocolate and mix- the proportions are as follows just expand proportionally for larger servings or refill like normal people.
8 oz Hot Chocolate
1 Bailey's
1 Malibu
1/2 Creme de Cacao
Put it in the mug, use as much whipped cream as you like and then sprinkle the cinnamon and/or the brown sugar. The brown sugar is a little sweeter than necessary but some people like it. If you want to be even more festive, puncture the whipped cream with a cinnamon stick.
That'll make your Christmas merrier, guaranteed.
Submitted by goferforhire (user info) at 2006-12-15 08:46:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am going to use these so much when I have my own kitchen next year. Especially that sauce one.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2006-12-15 08:42:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
recipes suck balls. I once tried to make a pizza from flour, took me an hour made a big fucking mess and tasted like shit, what a fucking waste of time cooking is, fuck you
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2006-12-15 08:40:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously people, each one of the recipes kicked ass.
Make them, love them.