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Brush your palms (456 hits)

Category: Quotes & Stories -> Poetry

Rating: -1.75 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Heavyfoot (View user info) at 2006-12-18 20:06:51 EST


Okay the first one was riddled with spelling mistakes that I would not normally make and so I'm reposting this.

Have you ever felt spent time seep through your tired pores?
Like the dirty suds in a discarded sponge in the back of a bathroom drawer
It sits under your dry, cracked skin. It makes it blue and pale.
And like the forgotten loaf in the cupboard it turns so quickly stale.

You reach inside and try to hold on, gripping with sore thumbs
It falls apart through fingers and you're left with only crumbs
You can still taste them on your tongue just now with bitter edge
They sit in your palm as vague memories and snapshots in your head

You must brush your palms off, my friend and though I know it hurts.
If you allow those crumbs to mould it can only get much worse
They'll poison you and no amount of meds will rectify.
You must brush your palms off, my friend and I will help you try.

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User Reviews


Submitted by jfreakman (user info) at 2006-12-19 01:24:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

why would you repost this again?

Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2006-12-18 22:25:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

I tried singing it to the tune of "Dixie," but it didn't work very well.

Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-12-18 21:04:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Are you Orgasmatron?

No?


NO POETRY FOR YOU!

Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:58:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:14:20 (#)
Ranking: -2

I think:
1) This blew
2) You suck
3) I'm hungry

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:08:28 (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:05:00 (#)
Ranking: 0

Do you know what? I'm actually ashamed that I missed both of those.

Those are mistakes that I would NEVER normally make. I feel I should repost this.
-------
sure, why not?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:05:00 (#)
Ranking: 0

Do you know what? I'm actually ashamed that I missed both of those.

Those are mistakes that I would NEVER normally make. I feel I should repost this.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:03:08 (#)
Ranking: 0

Though an admitted minority, there are a number of uberers who welcome poetry.

You need to some work on spelling, punctuation, and meter. It's "pores" and "drawer", not "pours" and draw". Even if you pronounce it "draw", it no longer rhymes, you see. Your punctuation is all over the place, and you have an inconsistent number of syllables in some lines.

Hope this helps.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:03:00 (#)
Ranking: 0

Okay

Edit: I know it's a major faux pas to post SHITTY poetry but fuck it.........

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2006-12-18 19:59:42 (#)
Ranking: 0

It really depends on whether the poetry is decent or not.

Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:43:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:31:07 (#)
Ranking: -2

is it just me or has ubersite got 10 times worse?

====================================

Yes and yes.


Submitted by GnarlsBarkley (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:42:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

*foghorn* BOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRIIINNGGGGG

Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:31:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

is it just me or has ubersite got 10 times worse?

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:16:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2006-12-18 20:14:20 (#)
Ranking: -2

I think:
1) This blew
2) You suck
3) I'm hungry
d) repost didn't help


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Homer Badman