Florida still sucks. (521 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.28 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Not Really a J-O-O (View user info) at 2006-12-18 23:08:47 EST
Last night, some friends were getting ready to go back to their snowy haven of a home state. So I decided to see them off with some beer and fun. So I went to the store, and reached for a case of Bud.
"NO BEER ON SUNDAYS!" was the panicked shriek that greeted me the instant my hand touched the cardboard of the case. I turned around, and three old ladies were 'tsk'-ing me as if I had just butt-raped their precious overweight chihuahua with its patchy, mange ridden fur, and its nipples sticking out on the sides. One of them actually muttered "miscreant" as I left the store. It took me over an hour to locate a spot that wasn't incorporated Orange county or something like that, and at each store I became more and more angry. At one point I started ranting loudly throughout the establishment and through the parking lot about how it's an anti-semetic law, and Florida hates Jews such as myself, and some bullshit about writing the governor.
That's really, all I have to say, other than the fact that I am not a Jew.
User Reviews
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2006-12-20 06:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Move to Britain. Or anywhere that isn't America and doesn't have retarded drinking laws. You can be blind drunk in some pubs at 10AM here.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-12-20 06:06:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
See, that's your problem. You live in Happy Fantasy Family Land USA. You need to move the fuck out of central Florida.
Submitted by erosion_rules (user info) at 2006-12-19 15:30:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-12-19 10:04:25 (#)
Ranking: -2
I lived in FL, and you can buy beer on sundays. Even better you can buy it at any 7-11, grocery store or gas station.
Now here in MA, the fucking stores close before 11 on weekends, and you have to go to a liquor store.
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Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-12-19 08:26:48 (#)
Ranking: 0
I buy beer on Sundays in F-L-A. Maybe they just won't sell it to you. Joos shouldn't drink anyway - they can't handle it. Drunk Joos are why we roundeyes got your land for a handfull of beads and some smallpox-infested blankets. Something to think about.
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Like I said in the post, I eventually got the beer, they just wouldn't sell it to me in Orange county. I had to go way the fuck out by the Disney college program apartments in Osceola county to get it.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2006-12-19 10:04:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I lived in FL, and you can buy beer on sundays. Even better you can buy it at any 7-11, grocery store or gas station.
Now here in MA, the fucking stores close before 11 on weekends, and you have to go to a liquor store.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2006-12-19 08:26:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I buy beer on Sundays in F-L-A. Maybe they just won't sell it to you. Joos shouldn't drink anyway - they can't handle it. Drunk Joos are why we roundeyes got your land for a handfull of beads and some smallpox-infested blankets. Something to think about.
Submitted by combatwombat (user info) at 2006-12-19 07:46:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you should have slapped them in the face with your circumsized not-really-a-jewish dick.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2006-12-19 07:14:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you should write a letter to the gubner.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2006-12-19 06:01:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's like that in other states too, jerk off.
Maybe you should move the fuck out.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2006-12-19 04:58:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I was called a 'young hooligan' once - I mean really - who says that? this isn't the 1950's bitch. It sux cos you let off one homemade bomb outside someones house which destroys thier letterbox and you are instantly labelled.
Old people suck
That means you bubba124839439853 or whateva the fuck your name is
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2006-12-19 04:56:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah Arkansas has that crap law. It's utterly pointless and just annoying. Damn the world I say.
Submitted by big_z_1980 (user info) at 2006-12-19 02:05:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
mmmm jew hater.
i hope the ACLU hunts you down
Submitted by jfreakman (user info) at 2006-12-19 01:31:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kentucky is like that also.
Butthole of the union, that's what that damned state is.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2006-12-18 23:55:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Deny, deny, deny. The more you deny, the more true it is.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-12-18 23:43:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
something similar in Utah once.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2006-12-18 23:39:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Only because this happened to me in a place called Belpre, Ohio. So if you're ever in Belpre, Ohio.... But why would you be?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-12-18 23:30:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
stoopid law