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When Life Gives You Lemons... (repost. smaller pic.) (847 hits)

Category: Humor -> Dumb Jobs

Rating: 0.83 on 18 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Targa (View user info) at 2007-01-03 12:24:24 EST


Yesterday, shortly after 8am, I'm sitting at my desk, bleary-eyed and half-asleep, 10 hours into my 12 hour shift. I'm pretending not to be waking up from a 2-hour nap.

Off in the corner of my office, I have a security monitor, and under my desk is located the all-powerful door opening button. During off-hours, I have the power to decide who gets in and who stays locked out. This power only works when unathorized people aren't so sneaky as to catch the door while it's closing behind someone else.

The door buzzer goes off. It's our secretary, early as usual. I let him in without much thought, and then realise that he's been followed by some guy I've never seen before. Lazily, I assume he's the secretary's friend. That way, at least I don't have to go find out who the stranger is that I've just granted access to the building.

Three minutes later, Terry (the secretary), comes around the corner of my desk with the strager. He introduces him, just like he always does with new employees.

"Targa, this is Nate, our new intern. It's his first day."

At this point, I'm almost fully awake. I'm awake enough to fake a smile, extend a handshake and welcome this poor student to our company.

"Oh, Hi Nate. I'm Targa. Good to have you around." We shake hands, and then I turn back to my computers, satisfied that the meeting went well, the stranger I opened the door for is allowed to be here, and that I am now safe to go back to napping.

Behind me, I hear Terry leave my office.

My new friend Nate, I can only assume, is still standing there. I put both palms flat on my desk, and slowly push my office chair around 180 degrees, hoping that maybe in the six seconds it takes me turn around fully, that the new kid will have disappeared.

He's still standing there. Jacket on. Both backback straps in use.

"Are you MY intern?"

"Yup! I'm supposed to be here at 9, so I guess I'm a little early."

At this point, I'm baffled. I didn't know we hired interns in the first place, let alone that I was going to have one following me around like a lost puppy. My boss isn't due in for another 2 hours, and most of the office will show up late for the next two weeks, since they're still confused from Christmas when they were on vacation.

"What? Am I supposed to train you?"

"I guess so... What should I do with my stuff?"

"Nevermind that... here's five bucks, go get us coffees"

you're_hired!.JPG (55 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-01-05 04:58:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-03 14:15:59 (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2007-01-03 13:20:16 (#)
Ranking: 1

www.lemonparty.org
-------------------
exactly where i thought this post was going when i read the title

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I clicked on this just to +2 it for not being lemonparty. I didn't read this.

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-01-05 04:41:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

we are still wondering about your colour

Submitted by Targa (user info) at 2007-01-05 04:17:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by earth_collapse (user info) at 2007-01-04 02:44:59 (#)
Ranking: 0

Edit for a living, ey?


-------------

Yup. For a tv station. We're a 24 hour operation.

Submitted by Targa (user info) at 2007-01-05 04:16:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-01-04 20:32:55 (#)
Ranking: -1

No Comment

--------------------


Everything you ever wanted to know about Zebra
User id: 29369
Registered on or around: 2006-11-25 13:34:37
# Messages posted: 0
# Reviews written: 105
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 0
# Hits: 0
Average rating of all messages: 0.00


Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-01-04 20:32:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -1

No Comment

Submitted by earth_collapse (user info) at 2007-01-04 02:44:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Edit for a living, ey?

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-01-03 20:27:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0



Submitted by darko (user info) at 2007-01-03 15:57:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Throw a lemon party!

Submitted by 501LatinVerbs (user info) at 2007-01-03 15:34:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

nice, but you feel you want more at the end

Submitted by fclo002 (user info) at 2007-01-03 15:25:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Ch ch ch chia!

Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-03 14:15:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2007-01-03 13:20:16 (#)
Ranking: 1

www.lemonparty.org
-------------------
exactly where i thought this post was going when i read the title

Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2007-01-03 13:20:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

www.lemonparty.org

Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:46:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Targa, post more pictures of you. We need to know what colour you are.

Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:44:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

The receptionist has an intern...


Or is that just part of your job?


I expect screen shots of you timing his little coffee runs.

Submitted by Targa (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:41:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:39:52 (#)
Ranking: 1

Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:30:56 (#)
Ranking: 0

5 bucks... you spoil him. i'd have made him get the coffee AND pay. The fucking slacker.
-----------
no no no - you pay the first time, then, every other time, claim your a little short and can he cover it?
That's how you do it.
-----------
Exactly.

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:39:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:30:56 (#)
Ranking: 0

5 bucks... you spoil him. i'd have made him get the coffee AND pay. The fucking slacker.
-----------
no no no - you pay the first time, then, every other time, claim your a little short and can he cover it?
That's how you do it.


Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:38:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

<insert previous comments here>

Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-03 12:30:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

5 bucks... you spoil him. i'd have made him get the coffee AND pay. The fucking slacker.


Homer: Dig him up!!! Dig up that corpse! If you really love
Jebediah Springfield, you'll haul his bones out of the ground
to prove my daughter wrong! Dig up his grave! Pull out his
tongue!

Quimby: Can't we have one meeting that doesn't end with us digging up
a corpse?

Lisa the Iconoclast