I Condemn this Website with All of My Being!!! (1972 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.23 on 88 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Charlton Heston (View user info) at 2007-01-05 17:55:36 EST
For some considerable time now I, Chuck Heston (born John Charles Carter in this great and magnificent land of ours, the United States of America, one nation indivisible under a just and loving God), have been browsing the appalling online atrocity that is Übersite from the spacious study of my sun-kissed mansion behind concrete walls and iron gates and guards making security sweeps, and I have come to the conclusion that I have never before witnessed such a self-supporting mass of low-life rabble comprised of perverts, degenerates, sickos, whackos, pinkos, homos, overweight beasts, foreign mouthpieces, talentless hacks, pubescent horndogs, dirty old men, harlots, wenches, sluts, wantons, hussies, loudmouths, blockheads, insurrectionists, seditionists, treasonists, pornmongers, onanists, exhibitionists and worst of all, Canadians, who may be any or all of the above. You whine about threatened limitations to abortion when you all should been noisily diced and suctioned or plucked piece by twitching piece squealing from your mother's wombs, a job which would have required little exertion as it is obvious your mothers rarely if ever had their knees together, instead spending most of their time on their backs waving their legs in the air like flags and beckoning every passing tumescence to come one, come all. You whine about the dangers of the God-given right to enjoy the free and exhilarating use of legally registered firearms when you should all be tarred and feathered and set to run through a sun-dappled glade gobbling your stupid nonsense while so-called 'advocates of violence' such as myself could accept your label for once and go to town on a turkey shoot, blowing your damnable empty heads to pieces. You whine endlessly about the President when that honorable and courageous servant of the Lord God is doing everything in his power to fight the fight for freedom and righteousness and asking merely for our prayers and financial support in his time of darkest need and purest vision and all you can do is sit in your dirty hovels day after day after day surfing the internet and tossing anonymous insults and pawing at your genitals like a damned dirty ape in a cage. You whine about our sweet Lord Jesus Christ who died on the cross for your sins, you, YES, YOU, with your engorged member in your hand and an expression that reflects little more than a bovine lack of sentience, and on high in the Kingdom of Heaven the Savior looks down upon you and weeps for what has become of the modern American man, a society once willing to carve new territories out of jungle and desert or take them by force from the unwashed, unrepentant jibbering heathen when so decreed by the Lord God, and now content to sit in front of a small screen while the clock ticks and the heart beats and every moment brings you closer to that final day, the day of your death and your judgment before the Lord God, and his judgment cometh right soon!
Repent, sinner, repent, for all of you worship a false god, a hollow idol, a phantasm of perversion and filth, and the one who shaped that idol of light and bytes is Bart Cilfone, yet one more misguided panderer and a pathetic servant of a dark master who will offer only one reward in the end, despair and eternal suffering. Repent, Überusers, repent!
I am not a 'noob' in the ways of salvation.
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-10 20:55:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-10 19:29:24 (#)
Ranking: -2
Thanks for linking to the original as well, fuckhead. At least the others guys gave credit TO THE FUCKING WRITER OF THE STORY.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-09 20:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Still cracks me up.
Submitted by sweetcheebs (user info) at 2007-01-08 14:57:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
its worth a read but -1 for wall o text
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-01-08 11:32:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-08 11:10:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-01-06 19:01:54 (#)
Ranking: -2
If you're going to do the tired "celebrity visits ubersite" bit, you might want to choose a funnier celebrity. Or at least learn where the Enter button is.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-01-08 08:38:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:04:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
anm yyo siuck my codck yiu fagot
Submitted by NecroBlanca1 (user info) at 2007-01-06 20:26:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-01-06 19:01:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If you're going to do the tired "celebrity visits ubersite" bit, you might want to choose a funnier celebrity. Or at least learn where the Enter button is.
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-06 18:56:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
plus two for: "Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:42:22 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh for fuck sake. The first motherfucking chance I get to... and this... nevermind.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:41:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well I am off to enjoy my weekend, sipping scotch and soda by the fire and reading the Good Book. Happy Friday, sinners, and remember that if you do not repent every day will be FRYday as you bubble and hiss and shriek in pits of boiling oil in the darkest reaches of hell.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:39:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:22:09 (#)
Ranking: 1
whose is it?
i hope this one isn't a one hit wonder. Uber needs a good solid alter right now.
>No, my misguided friend, what Uber needs is a good solid ALTAR before which you should beseech the Lord God on bended knee begging forgiveness for sins caught in the eternal web of the worldwide web and subject to recall and review at the click of a button, so change your sinning ways lest your past abominations be paraded before you. It will sicken your soul, such as it is, eternal and bound for damnation. I know it has sickened mine. "
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 18:55:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just needed to +2 something.
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2007-01-06 15:29:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
plus 2 if only for the total awesomeness that is Charlton Heston.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 03:51:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I just needed to -2 something.
Submitted by pannerplant (user info) at 2007-01-06 02:55:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HOORAY FOR EVERYTHING
and all the races go: "do-do-doo, doo-do-do-do-do YEAH!"
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 02:48:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I understand.
Not really.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-06 02:45:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
The Dude Abides
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 02:30:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's a joke, man.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-06 02:26:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
BIG BLOCK OF TEXT ASSHOLE! You do realise that when someone tries to write something and it comes out in this big block of text with zero grammer that people read the first line and can't be bothered so how do you feel about that? ashamed? cos you should. I didn't even bother to read this shit, try again, but even then I probably wouldn't read it because you seem boring. BORING I tells ya. And Danger_Ranger is not a poo poo head, he's an aussie poo poo head.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:51:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I apologize.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:28:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hailing from Long Beach, California, talented character actor Anthony Zerbe has kept busy in Hollywood and on stage since the late 1960s, often playing villainous or untrustworthy characters, with his narrow gaze and unsettling smirk. Zerbe was born May 20, 1936, in Long Beach, and served a stint in the US Air Force before heading off to New York to study drama under noted acting coach Stella Adler.
He made his screen debut as "Dutchie", one of Charlton Heston's fellow cowhands in the western Will Penny (1968), played a miner in The Molly Maguires (1970), was a post-apocalyptic, lunatic messiah in The Omega Man (1971), hustled a naive Paul Newman in The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean (1972), played a leper colony leader in Papillon (1973) and a former lawman gone bad in Rooster Cogburn (1975). Zerbe also starred alongside David Janssen in the TV series "Harry O" (1974) as the urbane, nattily dressed Lt. K.C. Trench, Janssen's sometime nemesis, for which he picked up an Emmy Award.
Definitely in strong demand for sinister roles, Zerbe played a crazed scientist in the corny KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park (1978) (TV), was an arrogant father in The Dead Zone (1983), made a great Gen. Ulysses S. Grant in "North and South, Book II" (1986) (mini), starred in the military drama Opposing Force (1986) and suffered a grisly demise in an airlock full of money in the James Bond thriller Licence to Kill (1989). Most recently, Zerbe has been seen as "Councillor Hamann" in The Matrix Reloaded (2003) and The Matrix Revolutions (2003).
In addition to his extensive television and film appearances, Zerbe has appeared in Broadway productions including "The Little Foxes", "Terra Nova" and "Solomon's Child". He was in residence for five summer seasons at The Old Globe Theatre playing several key Shakespearean characters to strong critical acclaim. He has also held residencies at the Theatre of the Living Arts in Philadelphia, the Arena Stage in Washington, D.C., and the Huntington Theatre Company in Boston. In 2003 he toured across several states with Roscoe Lee Browne in their production of "Behind The Broken Words", a performance of 20th-century poetry, comedy and drama.
source: imdb.com or something
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:26:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The Omega Man was fun, but Anthony Zerbe really upstaged you. Sorry for that.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:21:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 no penis
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:15:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I rather enjoy Noam Chomsky, too, but Gore Vidal is more reader-friendly.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:13:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The first half of the Ben Hur screenplay was written by Gore Vidal -- one of my favorites. That's what he says, anyway.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:11:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I enjoyed you in Ben Hur and A Touch of Evil. Beyond those, I find you abominable.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:10:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 21:38:44 (#)
Ranking: -2
Soylent Green is people!
_________________
Ahahahahahahahaha!
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:07:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not talking about the post.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-06 01:06:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking brilliant. On some sick level.
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2007-01-06 00:27:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, satirize something almost everyone hates. Real daring.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:54:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
http://www.festo.com/INetDomino/files/enter_key.jpg
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:41:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I have come to the conclusion that I have never before witnessed such a self-supporting mass of low-life rabble comprised of perverts, degenerates, sickos, whackos, pinkos, homos, overweight beasts, foreign mouthpieces, talentless hacks, pubescent horndogs, dirty old men, harlots, wenches, sluts, wantons, hussies, loudmouths, blockheads, insurrectionists, seditionists, treasonists, pornmongers, onanists, exhibitionists and worst of all, Canadians
__________________________________________________________
YOU FORGOT BEARS!
YOU MANIAC!!!
DAMN YOU!!!
GOD DAMN YOU TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:33:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
fiuck yoi ho mre itsjack youy asjhole
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:21:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's called paragraphs asshole... use them!
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:12:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
awhilre
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:07:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck its hard tio type rigt this tookme
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 23:06:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
methpod is as fuckli ng asshpole
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 22:52:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
check out the times... took method about three minutes to bag it
==
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:50:11 (#)
Ranking: -2
I just want to take this opportunity to admit I fuck my cats.
==
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
haah dumbass
--
No shit...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
Honestly, despite all the shit you hear, this is the first alter I've had in years. Years.
And because I am about to go out the door and head home I fuck it up.
DAMN!
Well, fuck this.
username: Charlton_H
password: blessed
Fuck.
==
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
haah dumbass
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 22:41:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Just let teh alter die already Methiod. You were right on top of that one huh?
Submitted by I_love_Kracka (user info) at 2007-01-05 22:07:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
George W. Bush finally registered
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2007-01-05 21:50:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I shall teanslate for all of you, so you can understand this.
Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. At this point I would rather have my eyes plucked out with needles than continuing, but I do anyway, because I've already condemned myself to reading this shit. At this point I would rather have my eyes plucked out with needles than continuing, but I do anyway, because I've already condemned myself to reading this shit. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. Pointless rambling with homoerotic undertones, waste of time, Annoying text block filled with bullshit, and suckage. FINALLY THEE END OF THE HORROR!
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Some picture of a total cuntbag. Some picture of a total cuntbag.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 21:25:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This was all an elaborate ruse, actually. I wanted to refute the accusations of alters horse87 and Wisher before voting commences for my next round in Ubermadness.
I know I'm going to win and all of you should, too. But It never hurts to be prepared with a couple of alters. Just in case.
I deliberately created this one, and then fucked it up in a purposeful but ham handed way to 'show' my inefficiency with same and thus generate reasonable doubt in the inferior minds of my fans here on uber.
You'll notice the 'drunk' posts below to further perpetuate the illusion.
A simple check of the time stamps obviously shows I am pretending to be under the influence to help in that regard.
Then I pretended to 'out' myself so that I could then feel free to tell you all what miserable fucks you are with no fear of retaliation. It's great! I can tell you to fuck right off and then feign innocence, and I am such a skillful writer and superior intellect you will never really know!
BOO-YAH!
BOW DOWN BEFORE ME FUCKERS
I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU
I CAN CREATE ALTERS WITH A SWEEP OF MY MIGHTY STAFF AND A STROKE OF MY TINY PEN, OR VICE VERSA I FORGET IM DRUNK, REMEMBER
i meamn im drnuk
and now back to your regularly scheduled uberlord...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 21:13:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That's wat happens when you klet the machines take over he never saw Treminator?
V
VV
V
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-01-05 20:57:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
How did Bart verify Charlton_H with a name like that? Does he even look anymore?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 20:56:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I was goinhg to say something else but fuckit
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 20:56:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ps now you know why I don't fick around with alters anymor I always fick themn up.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 20:55:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I am somwhat drumk.
I had a carving for Bloody Marys on the way home.
The guy at the loacl dive bar makes them just right. Spicy as shit with gigantor olives.
But taht doies not make me a mary.
They took the chill of too. Cold for California, going down tu abot 31F... 1 or 2C? Laugh, northeatsteners but that's cold for this area.
My shoes feel tight all o the sudden.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2007-01-05 20:37:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:48:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:35:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAAAAAAA
Well this narrows it down some.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:33:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I love you Sacrilicious, in spite of your liberal views and outrageously small breasts.
I often masturbate to your image as enhanced by my vivid imagination and a fifth of JD.
Don't forget to vote in ubermadness.
I'm fat and bald(ing) but my aim is true.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:23:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ouch... Shame.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:19:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
damn
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:14:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I thought you were going home, my most faithful servant.
Prepare my meal, and afterwards you may plant your seed between my toes and dry them with your toupee.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:11:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
eet mor dik
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:10:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The joke's over, man. Get your own routine.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:07:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
FLAWLESS VICTORY IS MINE SAITH THE LORD THY GOD
BOW DOWN BEFORE I SMITE THEE SODOMITES
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:03:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Not Shlongy.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:02:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I love you, dumbass.
V
V
V
V
V
v
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-05 19:02:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Happy fucking horseshit.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:58:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Although I have to say that those comments are VERY revealing.
Indeed.
Now I know who you are, fucker.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:57:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus, dude, at least put some effort into it...
V
V
V
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:55:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Although I grow weary of them at times, and pine for the touch of a woman, or something similar.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:51:22 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I prefer the black one because its little vagina really stands out against the darker fur.
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:50:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I just want to take this opportunity to admit I fuck my cats.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
haah dumbass
--
No shit...
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Honestly, despite all the shit you hear, this is the first alter I've had in years. Years.
And because I am about to go out the door and head home I fuck it up.
DAMN!
Well, fuck this.
username: Charlton_H
password: blessed
Fuck.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:46:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
haah dumbass
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:45:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Largeuglyblockoftext
Ubersite is made from people!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:44:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like this side of you, Jack.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:43:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
RIP Charlton Heston
2007-01-05 18:43:00
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:42:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You ignorant fucker.
V
V
V
V
V
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:42:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh for fuck sake. The first motherfucking chance I get to... and this... nevermind.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:41:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well I am off to enjoy my weekend, sipping scotch and soda by the fire and reading the Good Book. Happy Friday, sinners, and remember that if you do not repent every day will be FRYday as you bubble and hiss and shriek in pits of boiling oil in the darkest reaches of hell.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:39:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:22:09 (#)
Ranking: 1
whose is it?
i hope this one isn't a one hit wonder. Uber needs a good solid alter right now.
>No, my misguided friend, what Uber needs is a good solid ALTAR before which you should beseech the Lord God on bended knee begging forgiveness for sins caught in the eternal web of the worldwide web and subject to recall and review at the click of a button, so change your sinning ways lest your past abominations be paraded before you. It will sicken your soul, such as it is, eternal and bound for damnation. I know it has sickened mine.
Submitted by yhywstudios (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:35:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Charlton_H (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:33:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You little bastardizations of a once proud and noble human race should bow down before the Lord God and kiss my snow-white Republican ass lest He smite you down from above or I smack you down with a .38 hollowpoint in a smooth driveby after which I will plead the diminished capacity of the average aging American embarrassment you smug little cretins. I will walk, you will be wornfeed. Think on that and quail as your fondle yourselves in the sickly, bitter light of your computer screen.
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:30:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I chuckled. The epitomy of makes me smile.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:22:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
whose is it?
i hope this one isn't a one hit wonder. Uber needs a good solid alter right now.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:13:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Here comes your brother Yul Brynner, to kick your ass
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:11:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Partly funny with a chance of bigblockofwurdz syndrome.
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:10:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Moses and the NRA, you can't beat that combination.
Submitted by Sheba (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:08:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by PioneerBill (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:06:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+
2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2
+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+
2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2
+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+
2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2
+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2
Super, especially the Canadian part!
"You'll have to take this gun from my cold dead fingers!"
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:05:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
If you didn't discharge the atmosphere with the Canadian thing, this would've gotten a +2.
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:05:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Started off well... then sucked. Hard.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:04:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:03:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are John Carter? Didn't we meet on Barsoom?
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-01-05 18:03:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
not me
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-01-05 17:59:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This cracked me up.