A Guide To Girlfriends: The Right Gift to Choose (1444 hits)
Category: HumorLabels: dating_guide
Rating: 1.54 on 52 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hourman (View user info) at 2007-01-12 06:23:51 EST
User Reviews
Submitted by DreamWeaver (user info) at 2008-01-03 14:26:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber needs a great big kick up the arse. Rate and review people, rate and review!!
Thanks Hourman.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2008-01-02 14:15:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-02 13:15:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW, I think I have the potential to become one, if not all, of the bad girlfriend types. I recently filled the bath tub with play sand, smothered sun tan oil over my body, put on my fave bikini and awaited for my other half to return from work with two 'holiday' cocktails. We built sandcastles and buried our feet before I turned on the taps and the 'tide' came in. What happened next was x rated. I do think I am a few sandwiches short of a picnic but, so far, only in a good way :)
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-01-02 13:00:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fanfuckingtastic.
Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2007-01-15 06:40:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by tartpumper (user info) at 2007-01-15 06:12:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I give my missus a good bumming for her birthday. Beats a ring anyday.....
What...?
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-15 05:22:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You know it. I can't post images without all that shit coming up.
Thankfully I have no enemies!
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-01-15 04:56:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
choy?
coolectric?
filename fuckup?
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-15 04:46:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Fair few people started looking at these.... look at the earlier ones, they are funnier apparently.
Bunch of turncoats.
Submitted by Timmaaaaah (user info) at 2007-01-15 03:29:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If a really ugly girl bought me an Xbox 360 premium package, I would marry her there and then and do whatever she wanted for ever and ever.
Even extracting the limescale from theeeeeeeee most difficult places to reach.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2007-01-13 08:06:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Humor with a dash of insanity. I dig.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2007-01-13 07:29:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2007-01-12 21:06:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'll kick your ass at any video game, any day. Except Mortal Kombat. I hate Mortal Kombat.
Submitted by consuelo212 (user info) at 2007-01-12 20:56:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-01-12 17:29:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
if i got my girl a necklace or ring or something retardedly expensive like that and she said some shit like "did you keep the receipt?" I'd say "Yeah, but I'm sure I'll find a chick that wants it. get the fuck out of my house, bitch. No, you don't have time to wipe your ass, pinch that loaf off, turn on the bathroom fan on your way out, and never come back."
bitch.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-01-12 17:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
if i got my girl a necklace or ring or something retardedly expensive like that and she said some shit like "did you keep the receipt?" I'd say "Yeah, but I'm sure I'll find a chick that wants it. get the fuck out of my house, bitch. No, you don't have time to wipe your ass, pinch that loaf off, turn on the bathroom fan on your way out, and never come back."
bitch.
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-01-12 13:00:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Beano is correct of course. I was trying to be nice.
Off to pub; anyone coming?
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:43:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not your job to buy her things. If she measures your affection by the material possessions you provide, she's a gold-digging bitch who needs a sheet lightning enema.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:36:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
She mocks you when she cums first?
Christ, you can't win with women.
Imagine what she'd do if you did first and she didn't have a chance to.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:23:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Have a good weekend all, I'll see you Monday
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:11:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My spelling is retarded
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:11:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/97617
www.ubersite.com/m/97617
Or they're alloud to do a Joey G
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:06:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:42:22 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:55:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't remember where I went for my girls ring...it was none of those places though. It was only engagement and cost around £400.
Yeah I know that now! Damn youthful petulance and a job!
--
Really it should be about the moment you give the ring to the special lady, and making sure it isn't some grossly big lunp of snot that the poor lass can't hold up. Only cheesy porn actressses have massive rings (yes I'm aware that can mean two things there)
Oh by the way never let her know that you reffered to it as 'ONLY engagement' They say there is some formula for buying that particular ring and how much you should spend on it. I forget what it is now.
--------
one months salary and diamond basically. They are allowed to kill you if you break these rules.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 12:00:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
TTOM.... I don't know whether to congradulate or refer you to a guide... but that would mean I have my head up my own ass :(
As long as she doesn't play Nin 'annoy the fuck outta all around me' dogs.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:58:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Mine is remarkably easy to buy for since she too is a geek so books or a game for her DS and shes cool
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:58:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:56:53 (#)
Ranking: 0
She won't read this.....but if she did she'd be aware that i love her....
--
Good man. Good Luck and congratulations.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:56:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
She won't read this.....but if she did she'd be aware that i love her....
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:42:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:55:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't remember where I went for my girls ring...it was none of those places though. It was only engagement and cost around £400.
Yeah I know that now! Damn youthful petulance and a job!
--
Really it should be about the moment you give the ring to the special lady, and making sure it isn't some grossly big lunp of snot that the poor lass can't hold up. Only cheesy porn actressses have massive rings (yes I'm aware that can mean two things there)
Oh by the way never let her know that you reffered to it as 'ONLY engagement' They say there is some formula for buying that particular ring and how much you should spend on it. I forget what it is now.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:22:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:16:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
People are aware that I am 20....aren't they?.....well I am so feck off!
:)
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:14:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:01:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.milfhunter.com
/\
|
|
that's my physics teacher.
-------
I'm at work :(
Thankfully I know the link :)
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-01-12 11:01:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.milfhunter.com
/\
|
|
that's my physics teacher.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:55:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't remember where I went for my girls ring...it was none of those places though. It was only engagement and cost around £400.
Yeah I know that now! Damn youthful petulance and a job!
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:53:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:27:02 (#)
Ranking: -1
YOU CALL THAT A DIAMOND???
Dear God but you suck
--------
Not really....but if you use google images then you know....
I cleary suck compaired to your rating/ writing/ comedic brilliance...oh wait
Everything you ever wanted to know about ubetidid
User id: 18608
Registered on or around: 2005-05-02 13:35:03
# Messages posted: 0
# Reviews written: 1858
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 0
# Hits: 0
Average rating of all messages: 0.00
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:36:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you go down the Jewellry route be very careful where you get it from. High street places are generally frowned upon as they are seen as little better than 'ARGOS'. The actual item may look lovely but if it is encased in a box with something like 'H Samuel' or others such as this ilk they will pretty much rip your bollocks off.
Spend a little more in a nice independant jeweller and you will see the results speak for themselves.
Just a bit of advice is all.
By the way Hour you really shouldn't be spending £70 on a girl at 16, back in the good old days all it cost was a slap up fish and chip supper washed down with some Thunderbirds. If you were buying them jewels then the chances of getting a shag were very slim indeed.
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2007-01-12 10:27:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
YOU CALL THAT A DIAMOND???
Dear God but you suck
Submitted by Antioxident (user info) at 2007-01-12 09:48:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:56:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
All sounds about right to me...
Submitted by Lee-andro (user info) at 2007-01-12 09:40:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sweet
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-01-12 08:57:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ace
Submitted by Wicked (user info) at 2007-01-12 08:30:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well this one was better than the last one. Although "Kicker of all Ass" is still a bit much.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-01-12 08:29:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not nearly as good as the others...
Submitted by VileSin (user info) at 2007-01-12 08:26:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked the filename. >_>
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2007-01-12 07:36:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 07:00:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Lisa has ALWAYS -2 or 0d me. No idea why, I guess 'Superiority Complex'. She reminds me alot of one of my exs...which is disturbing.
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:56:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
All sounds about right to me...
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:55:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:38:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
You don't really understand women, or the text tool, or much of anything, do you? Be honest.
-------------
Fuck... someone needs to chill the fuck out.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:52:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:46:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:43:50 (#)
Ranking: 1
Funny stuff ! Is your spellchecker having urlaub , or are you just being distracted ?
Have a good weekend .
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:38:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
You don't really understand women, or the text tool, or much of anything, do you? Be honest.
-------
Rorrim: I should have gone through MS Word then pasted into text box. My bad! You too mate.
Lisa: When someone finally decides to bang some of that tension out of you feel free to not be a cunt. I get the feeling you're a GF OVERLORD: Mentalist/ Emotionalist/ Changeling little girl with one too many Daddy issues who chooses to blame all men for her own short-comings.
Submitted by rorrim (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:43:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Funny stuff ! Is your spellchecker having urlaub , or are you just being distracted ?
Have a good weekend .
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:38:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You don't really understand women, or the text tool, or much of anything, do you? Be honest.
Submitted by sworn (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:32:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:29:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2007-01-12 06:24:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Fucking White Space.