$2000 to BECOME Master Chief; SIGN ME THE FUCK UP. (1087 hits)
Category: NewsRating: 1.23 on 34 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DeathJester (View user info) at 2007-01-15 14:11:34 EST
Second post in around an hour, but this is far too awesome to not shout about.
http://www.hamiltonspectator.com/NASApp/cs/ContentServer?pagename=hamilton/Layout/Article_Type1&c=Article&cid=1168470616997&call_pageid=1020420665036&col=1014656511815
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The whole suit -- which draws design inspiration from Star Wars, RoboCop, Batman and video games -- is made from high-impact plastic lined with ceramic bullet protection over ballistic foam.
Its many features include compartments for emergency morphine and salt, a knife and emergency light. Built into the forearms are a small recording device, a pepper-spray gun and a detachable transponder that can be swallowed in case of trouble.
In the helmet, there's a solar-powered fresh-air system and a drinking tube attached to a canteen in the small of the back. A laser pointer mounted in the middle of the forehead is ready to point to snipers, while LED lights frame the face.
The whole suit comes in at 18 kilograms. It covers everything but the fingertips and the major joints, and could be mass-produced for about $2,000, Hurtubise says.
User Reviews
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2007-01-16 06:45:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent. Although the laser pointer to "Point out snipers" might be more of a curse than a blessing.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-01-16 03:08:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
sign me up, my bro thought he was hot shit when he got the limited edition halo x box he's gonna cry when master chief comes knockin
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-01-16 03:01:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Still-Life (user info) at 2007-01-15 21:26:00 (#)
Ranking: -2
$2000 is alot for a fucking suit.
The starwars shit isn't half that price.
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uh.... dude.... the armor i wore in Baghdad was $1,400 and it was just a vest. $2,000 is cheap as fuck. i'd buy that suit without blinking an eye if i needed that kind of protection.
Submitted by T.chow (user info) at 2007-01-16 02:43:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just put in 30 minutes researching this dude and his inventions.
Awesome
Submitted by Still-Life (user info) at 2007-01-15 21:26:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
$2000 is alot for a fucking suit.
The starwars shit isn't half that price.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2007-01-15 21:07:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it won't take
but it's fucking cool
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-01-15 21:06:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 17:47:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
All it needs now is a bulletproof MP3 player constantly playing t Gary Jules' "Mad World" cover plays through the internal speakers like the Gears of War advert.
Then war would be worth fighting.
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AHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHA
I WANT A FUCKING M16 WITH A CHAINSAW ATTACHMENT!
Then I would fucking go into Iraq, chainsaw running and just fucking chainsaw bitches like CRAAAAZY!
If I was ever rich, Id get like 30 of these, make a real life Halo 2 online map and play Halo 2 in real life.
Best $60-100,000 ever spent.
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2007-01-15 20:50:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
looksl ike someone took an assload of kneepads and sewed them together
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2007-01-15 20:17:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Is it merely coincidence that the guy named all the protection "Trojan?"
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2007-01-15 19:54:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 17:47:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
All it needs now is a bulletproof MP3 player constantly playing t Gary Jules' "Mad World" cover plays through the internal speakers like the Gears of War advert.
Then war would be worth fighting.
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Fuck yeah!
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 18:54:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-01-15 18:02:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
Somehow, it is always easy to spot the virgin living in their parents' basement.
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Thanks for the drive-by. Feel free to come by and deposit your little lump of
Sorry, i'm bored of this retort.
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2007-01-15 18:38:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that's fucking dope
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-01-15 18:02:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Somehow, it is always easy to spot the virgin living in their parents' basement.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 17:47:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
All it needs now is a bulletproof MP3 player constantly playing t Gary Jules' "Mad World" cover plays through the internal speakers like the Gears of War advert.
Then war would be worth fighting.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-01-15 17:22:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am now authorized to... be loyal as a puppy.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-01-15 16:24:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i don't need donations. i'll just charge it as a business expense. don't laugh just yet. if you think that sounds ridiculous, our senior scientist was going to send over off-road Segways last time i was in Baghdad. don't you wish you worked for my incredibly ridiculous and wasteful company?
the armor i got at Ft. Bliss last time i went was pretty nice, but not near as cool as the suit. i'm not going anywhere near any mosques this time. i almost got myself smoked a few times last time i was there because i was stupid enough to believe i wasn't going to get smoked. once you leave that gate, it gets pretty dangerous in certain areas. especially if you are driving an up-armored Land Cruiser with tinted windows in the wrong neighborhood.
i'll just stick to traveling by helo this time.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:53:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd donate.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:45:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:30:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm probably going back to Baghdad in a couple months. i'm just retarded enough to spend the money on this just so i can look like a super badass soldier of the future contracted to wipe out Islam and ensure the freedom of Americans is preserved forever. i'm not going for that purpose, but it would still be cool to wear the suit.
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Donations? I'll offer some bucks with the only clause being a photograph must be posted of you in your gear outside of a mosque scaring children away.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:30:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm probably going back to Baghdad in a couple months. i'm just retarded enough to spend the money on this just so i can look like a super badass soldier of the future contracted to wipe out Islam and ensure the freedom of Americans is preserved forever. i'm not going for that purpose, but it would still be cool to wear the suit.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:17:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think it's fucking awesome.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:06:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
When did your ratings start counting again?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:04:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh yeah...TOTALLY awesome.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 15:02:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:51:44 (#)
Ranking: 2
Not bad.
For the ridiculous URL http://www.tinyurl.com
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Since I was fooled by cob77, i've not trusted that site. I'll not use it.
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:59:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, but does it only come in Black? Or can I get one in Harvest Wheat?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:58:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.birkoph.com/Wolf_tshirt.htm
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:54:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I bet he's got a wolf shirt on under there.
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:51:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Not bad.
For the ridiculous URL http://www.tinyurl.com
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:49:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If I had two thousand bucks... I'd get drunk alot more than I do... but if I had like eleventy millions, I'd totally buy one of them.
To help fight off all that pussah.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:41:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't you read the article, Snark?
This thing comes with a solar powered cooch in the crotch!
If it doesn't, you could suggest he swaps that clock for a fleshlight.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:31:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
The men of Uber need these just to fight off all the pussy.
Right?
Right?
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:17:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THAT is all sorts of awesome... fucking odd.
But awesome.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:15:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow... how can they make it so cheap.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:15:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that guy looks like a Borg
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2007-01-15 14:12:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Side scrolling URL :(