a thought (394 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.17 on 18 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hairy Coup <hairy_coo1.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2007-01-27 19:10:19 EST
i was watching this attenborough docco about chimps and how in the last few years they have made technological advances such as learning how to kill flamingos near the waters edge, obviously an infinitely smaller advance than any of the achievement of we pompous humans, but still technology nevertheless.
it got me thinking about whether we as humans, or me even, could advance animal techonology by hundreds of thousands of years by teaching them a few things.
i make make a lasting impact. go to outer africa and teach them to farm.
"that guy who taught chimps how to farm chickens, thereby expediting their evolutionary process by millions of years"
my dead self would love that title.
what do you clowns think?
User Reviews
Submitted by NoMeD (user info) at 2007-04-17 17:27:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-01-28 13:45:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You should see this ...
http://www.pandb.org/news.php
^^^^
I remember kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaablam!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-04-17 17:18:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
had a dream a about you last night.
Submitted by I_love_Kracka (user info) at 2007-01-29 10:41:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
do it
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-01-29 02:30:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2007-01-28 16:10:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i wonder if bionic hands could somehow be grafted onto dogs
if dogs had proper hands with the special human opposable thumb or whatever it is, there would be no stopping them. i would be very curious to see what sort of car drivers they would be - i suspect they would be brilliant.
on another evolutionary matter, why do we Humans allow our safety and wellbeing to be menanced by another species: ie the fucking Sharks. In particular the white pointers. aren't we supposed to be rulers of the earth?????
I WOULD LIKE TO BE ABLE TO SWIM FAR OUT TO SEA AT ANY TIME OF DAY OR NIGHT, BUT I CAN'T BECAUSE THOSE FUCKING CUNTS MIGHT OUT THERE. THIS IS WRONG, A BRUTAL DENIAL OF MY LIBERTY.
if they can't be taught not to eat us, SOMETHING MEANINGFUL MUST BE DONE. perhaps extermination would be going to far, but maybe they could be removed from the wild and somehow kept in a few special regions or enormous marine zoos/prisons.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-28 14:01:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
shhhhhhhh.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-01-28 13:45:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You should see this ...
http://www.pandb.org/news.php
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-01-28 13:20:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
do it
Submitted by BranDo (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:45:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Once they tested chimps by providing them with typewriters and after a while one of them came up with 'to be or not to be bananas'
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-01-28 10:12:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-01-27 21:51:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I say go fer it. Altough I like the cut of DCWoody's jib, teach these chimps to fight sneaky like (traps and trip wires, etc) and then use them as you're own personal army. Look at what the Ewoks did to the Imperials, flat ate 'em up they did, and chimps gotta be better than Ewoks, bigger and what not. Next DUBMEEDEE's right there. Keep us updated.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:47:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
brilliant thinking!
like being a time traveller going back to the stone age
and, from what i've seen of monkeys, they COUILD be taught to farm
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:46:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:39:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Chimps build nests right?......and they fight a lot too....to the death often....teach them to make armour....I don't mean like chain mail or anything...just a simple woven helmet or currias for a bit of padding....combine this with the proper use of clubs and pointy sticks....
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:30:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
In fact, there's no good reason why they couldn't be taught to farm, depending how developed they are....there's a test that a kid should pass around 4/5 years old....where they are offered the choice of a small amount of chocolate now, or a lot of chocolate tomorrow.....if chimps can consistently pass this test...then they can farm.....farming isn't exactly hard....just potatos or similar anyway....bury them......dig em up 3 months later....could teach a posse of chimps that.....
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:27:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice thought, I've actually heard (not from a very reliable source though) that some chimps hunt with sticks from time to time....
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-01-27 20:01:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2007-01-27 19:27:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Planet of the apes.