Barbie's a Slut- So I guess i'm leaving college... (1042 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.36 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by *Shake-Aka Aquateen Hunger Force"* (View user info) at 2007-01-30 21:02:27 EST
I couldn't sleep last night. It wasn't the first time. But this time I sat there looking in my room with nothing to hold onto. I felt like I had lost everything I loved. I sacrificed a lot to be out here. Too damn much some would say. But it didn't matter what I lost for what I was gaining wasn't helping me. I was torn, shredded, disheveled and angry. For the first time in my life.... I was truly utterly lost. No scream, whimper, or tear came from my eye. Just jaded nothingness. I chose my path, and that was it...-Perkman Jan 29th ,07'
How the fuck do you pick a major? I have come to the conclusion that I truly am probably the most unprepared person for college since the formation of the concept of an institution for learning. Since before Aristotle. I didn't really get to look at a major per se'. I mean I had baseball practice games, and in all honesty I was going for the sport and the name recognition. I just wanted to wear the Penn State T's and the Abercrombie shorts like every other Frat boy, baseball, rugby, football player. I didn't really envision anything besides the fact I was planning to go to the Pro's.
I know how ill informed and misinformed that was but at the time all my friends were in that same mindset. Some just wanted a scholarship basically to anywhere that would pay for the school. They would go to any Div 2, or Div 3 school that offered. I on the other hand like a select few on the team had loftier expectations for myself.
I wanted to go to college. That was it. I never thought I would get into college in my earlier years. I did what every wannabe badass teen, drunk, party guy did in high school because as you know there basically two groups in high school. The kids that partied and drank and got C's, and the kids who actually planned on going to college who took every fucking tedious course which included drama, to AP classes, to every single club ever invented. Pretty much the douche bag kids who played football but they never saw a down just for their resume' or the kids who joined track a sport where anyone can be on the team just to write down that they were on a team. (In actually these kids were not part of any pts awarded in any event so they really weren't on the team, only the first two heats count in Track not the 8th).
I never really thought of the concept of college until I went to visit my brother at his state party school. I saw the plethora of good looking college girls that were everywhere. I saw keg stands, barbecues, tail gates, frat fights, goofing around and parades. I for the first time saw people my age (at the time 17-18) sitting with there parents and drinking beers. Moms getting drunks on mom's weekend with there son's frat buddies. I saw a world where as soon as you got to college you were an adult in the eyes of parents, teachers, cops, etc... everyone I ever knew.
But what really pulled me was the arrogance. The Arrogance of the kids that went to college and the kids that didn't. When you're in high school social standings are there but they really don't mean much. As long as you're in the popular crowd your friends with all those in the popular crowd. It didn't matter what you did to get there whether it be playing baseball, to being the guy who fights everyone, to be the "cool stoner", or badass James dean guy. You were all in the same crowd. But as soon as college started the lines were drawn in the sand and all of a sudden people that you have been friends with since grade school are "above you" and there nose gets higher as the greater the school they attend is. You go to visit your buddy since grade school at his "Frat house" filled to the brim with this "bought friends". Just goes to show you that you don't need real friends paid ones fit the bill more. At first they look at you as your cool but soon enough the "Smugness" comes into the room from the older frat brothers as they rattle off their soon to be degree's, and how much money there dad makes and how many sorority sluts they nailed are.
At first everything is alright. But all isn't what it seems. It seems the frat brothers don't want "kids that couldn't even get into a state school" at their frat. Usually your buddy is put into an awkward situation if he chooses you he's fucked. So you decide on your own to leave. It's a ritual that has happened at every college in the United States. Just insert school, frat, and buddy.
But I never really cared for all that I was a baseball player. So I high tailed it to play ball at a local JC. It was fun but I never really formulated a plan on what to do after sports. The guidance counselors kept pushing easy degree's on me to slip me into a middle of the road D-1 school. I didn't really mind it just if my school was paid for. But I soon realized that an education does matter. A degree from a certain school means more than a degree from others. So I took a pretty hard major taking my time but I really wasn't what I wanted to do. So here I am I have attained my dream. I have gotten into and been accepted by some of the top schools in the country. But I don't know what the hell I'm going to do. I want to play my sport. I never planned on this injury occurring. But hell I have been accepted into some of the best institutions in the country (Not ivy league). Since I'm a transfer if I leave I'm locked into this major for the next 2 years. I can't just switch. Finally I reach the parties, girls, tail gates, and pride I wanted..... But at the end I finally realized that you don't go to school for the name, or for the sake of college. You go to get a degree in something you love. I don't love what I'm doing. I want to be something else...
So how did you guys pick your degrees? I mean what about you made you become a doctor, or a lawyer, architect, communications, philosophy etc... Major?
What is a good degree for me? I'm a very kind person, I like to help people, I can talk and meet anyone, I'm athletic and if I like something I will research it and learn everything about it to death. I kind of want to do something in medical.
It's crazy I got into some great schools, but I'm going to decline so as to take another 1 ½ years of community college to find a major at something that suits me. I guess I'm going to miss out on the partying.
(Yeah, I know I left uber. But this place is heroin for misfits, and as you all know I'm a misfit no better than the lot of you. I really am like the rest of you. So when's the next ubercon?)
User Reviews
Submitted by jojo747 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:16:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
perkman you are as good as ever. Thank You.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 19:31:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's from perkmans leaving message.
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V
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-01-31 17:24:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Y HALO THAR GREENING
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled until someone cool disagrees or hates that person then everyone jumps on the bandwagon to destroy them. The cool kids (Or 33 year old losers who think they are cool) have little "Yes men" everywhere stroking there cocks on every lame and shitty post, on every crap piece of literature. This place is not, and has not been a writing forum. It never will be. People are given +2's on the most worthless picture posts, to crap drawings on MS-Paint. I think I know what Bart tried to do to this place but the losers will always infest what the great has made. And lower the standards of creativity and creation to their level just to not feel inferior. Which in real life is what they are?
Go perkman!
Submitted by mrnoisy (user info) at 2007-01-31 17:10:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
lol
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-01-31 16:45:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-01-31 01:04:08 (#)
Ranking: -2
I weep for the future of the USA.
Fortunately I am in the 1% that will rule society until the revolution comes.
_______
RIGHT ON
Submitted by webcorona (user info) at 2007-01-31 16:19:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:41:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:32:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:19:42 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96349
Oh dear god people, Scourge while I appreciate your half witted criticisms, my comment was by none other than perkman himself.
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Calling me or my comments halfwitted just wasnt very nice.
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Not to worry, all I contribute here is mediocre at best.
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Just take it in stride. Take it in stride.
Lets work through our differences and become sweet, sweet lovers again. I know we can do it with time. Whaddaya say?
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-01-31 16:10:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Considering that substance abuse is a major "occupational hazard" among doctors, the last thing the medical field needs is some asshole who's ALREADY addicted to pain medication.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:53:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I kind of want to do something in medical.
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good idea, perk-man..easier to get loaded that way
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:41:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:32:39 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:19:42 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96349
Oh dear god people, Scourge while I appreciate your half witted criticisms, my comment was by none other than perkman himself.
===
Calling me or my comments halfwitted just wasnt very nice.
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Not to worry, all I contribute here is mediocre at best.
Submitted by jojo747 (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:34:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:32:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:19:42 (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96349
Oh dear god people, Scourge while I appreciate your half witted criticisms, my comment was by none other than perkman himself.
===
Calling me or my comments halfwitted just wasnt very nice.
:(
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:22:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck off rob_berg, i'm harmelss
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-31 15:19:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/96349
Oh dear god people, Scourge while I appreciate your half witted criticisms, my comment was by none other than perkman himself.
Submitted by ubetidid (user info) at 2007-01-31 12:32:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
oh forgot about all that shit
and join Barnum and Bailey circus.
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2007-01-31 12:26:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Perk man = Auto -2
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2007-01-31 10:36:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Badly written.
But, since you asked: if you like sports and are crappy at things that require the mind (and I kinda think you may be), look into physical trainer/fitness type work. A basic knowledge of biology and physics will help, but it's mostly interpersonal skills. My wife's gym has a trainer who knows and can express not only what exercizing can do for you but why the results occur from a (non-specialist) physics and biology standpoint. Her classes are usually full and people don't drop out.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2007-01-31 10:17:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Stay in school.
Minor in 'paragraphs'
Submitted by aldenso (user info) at 2007-01-31 08:36:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
-1, but i will give u my advice anyway.
I am first year at Uni in Canada. My advice to you is to figure out what you want to do in life, then figure what you need to get there. Don't be afraid to change your mind. I am doing my B.A. because I wanted to be a lawyer and make tons of money and have an assload of toys and whatnot to play around with. At university I, and a bunch of my friends, have all realized that we just want to get out into the world and work a job that doesn't suck balls to go to every day. I no longer want to make kajillions of dollars and have 8 cars and a huge house. I just want to wake up every morning not knowing exactly what is ahead of me, and actually wanting, or atleast not hating, to get to work.
I want to be a police officer. I mean i pretend to hate them as a young guy, but im sure it would be kinda fun...I mean going to the shooting range and unloading clips, driving your car all fast and stuff, and doing car training...now that would be fun. Also up here in Canada we have (in the summer) cops that ride ATV's on the trails to make sure people are registered, also lake police, which basically just drive around the lake all day and get paid to do it. In the winter we have snowmobile cops, which im sure would be real fun.
well this is getting long...just remember, yes the girls are hot, the sex is abundant, and the alcohol is delicious, but really, how long do you want to work as hard as you will at your job while YOUR paying more than you will make for the first few years pays you of your fresh out of college job.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-01-31 07:55:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:14:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled
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i just wanted to take a moment to point out that this makes no sense.
the fat people?? what???
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The americans.
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-01-31 06:19:05 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
And you'd said you had left - I hate liars.
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-01-31 06:17:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck off and die you barely-literate, cock-spanking monkey boy.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-01-31 05:16:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Timmaaaaah (user info) at 2007-01-31 03:26:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
balls the size of grapefruits.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2007-01-31 01:20:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
der
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-31 01:10:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
scourge: 1
toe: -1
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-01-31 01:04:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I weep for the future of the USA.
Fortunately I am in the 1% that will rule society until the revolution comes.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2007-01-30 23:39:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a LOLita.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:59:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:46:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled
they are?!
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I've never been coddled.
And toe is obviously greening.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:46:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled
they are?!
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:42:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled until someone cool disagrees or hates that person then everyone jumps on the bandwagon to destroy them. The cool kids (Or 33 year old losers who think they are cool) have little "Yes men" everywhere stroking there cocks on every lame and shitty post, on every crap piece of literature. This place is not, and has not been a writing forum. It never will be. People are given +2's on the most worthless picture posts, to crap drawings on MS-Paint. I think I know what Bart tried to do to this place but the losers will always infest what the great has made. And lower the standards of creativity and creation to their level just to not feel inferior. Which in real life is what they are?
Go perkman!
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Don't fancy yourself to be better than you are. What you contribute here is mediocre at best. At BEST.
"I think I know what Bart tried to do to this place but the losers will always infest what the great has made."
Bart made what you see today. Nothing more, nothing less. It is what it is because he chose to limit his moderation of the site. Don't presume to know what his intentions were/are. To call those who have cliques or who choose to come here for poor MSPaint or inside jokes is awfully funny...are you aware of the fact that Bart has those whose posts he +2s almost regardless of what they post? That's being involved in a clique. I've seen Bart heap praise on inside jokes, on things that would appear to be not just silly, but absolutely fucking stupid to anyone not familiar with the site. That said, is he a loser for engaging in the behavior that you described as being the behaviour the 'losers' of this site engage in?
My God, MY HEAD IS ABOUT TO EXPLODE FROM THE IMPLICATIONS.
Users like you come along every now and again. You make a few posts that aren't completely destroyed because you have the ability to string together a few sentences without misspelling half the words and making two hundred grammatical errors. They get a decent reception. You start to form some opinions about the site, you think of yourself as being a more worthwhile poster or of greater value to the site and you start spouting off about it. You start dropping deuces on older users to show them you're above the juvenilia they engage in. You go down the front page showing everyone your displeasure with their antics by throwing down the mighty -2.
And then you get your real hazing becasue someone smarter and more talented than you will log onto Uber one day and decide to tell you what I'm telling you right now.
Maybe you'll shoot off some answer and I'll respond, maybe you'll chew over what I'm trying to point out to you and decide to drop your msguided ideas...lets see how it plays out.
I'm about sick of this for the night.
Here's my last thought for you to chew over:
I engage in ALL of the behaviour that you badmouthed up above. Unashamedly so. I come here to do whatever the fuck I please. But at the same time, I could write you into a fucking tin hat.
So....yeah.
Yeah.
yeah
PS, this post was a pile of worthless, but I'm in a decent mood. smooches.
Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:25:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by BadSamaritan87 (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:21:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Also,
Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2006-11-30 01:43:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
This was entertaining in that I'm not sure if it was a joke.
I mean, it's written so poorly. The construction of ideas is absolutely farcical. It doesn't just stumble through the language -- it stumbles through basic, coherent thought!
And I'll be damned if that's not entirely fucking brilliant.
Supposing this is written from the point of view of someone who is actually quite clever, of course.
And if so, what we got here is a believable glimpse into a character's conscience. No real thought or editing apparent -- this was the character's internal monologue simply spewed out without any regard for the shackles of grammar or logic! This was raw and real and entirely untouched. This is really how this freaking guy thinks!
I mean, could you imagine a person as fucking stupid as the character created here?
Honestly, I never could, until I read this.
Just kidding. Shennananangains -- he's my ALTER!
Submitted by BadSamaritan87 (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:18:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
The only classes you should be taking are ESL classes.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-01-30 22:14:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled
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i just wanted to take a moment to point out that this makes no sense.
the fat people?? what???
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:39:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"So how did you guys pick your degrees? What is a good degree for me?"
You are not seriously asking uber these questions.
Oh, fuck it. How did I pick my degree? Well, I went with mech. engineering primarily because I find the field's topics interesting, the courses were challenging, and the profession is reasonably lucretive (ie, I wasn't interested in spending 20k for a degree that would land me a job making 22k). But that's just me, everyone's different. What should you do? Fuck if I know. You need to figure out what you want out of school. Do you want to make a lot of money? Do you want to take mostly easy clasees? Mostly difficult classes? What fields (generally) are you interested in? Chemistry, physics, math, philosophy, economics, etc... What do you ultimately want to accomplish? Selflessly serve society, become an elected official, cure a disease, start the next microsoft, become the next American Idol? Only you can answer these questions for yourself.
You are wise to take your time with this, however. What are you, 21? 22? You have time. It's best to get yourself worked out and then pursue a discipline (whether through college or not) that you know you want to do. If you rush into things and flounder about studying something you kinda think you might want to do, you'll just end up wasting a lot of time and money.
Good luck with all that.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:36:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Basically this site sucks; the fat people here are coddled until someone cool disagrees or hates that person then everyone jumps on the bandwagon to destroy them. The cool kids (Or 33 year old losers who think they are cool) have little "Yes men" everywhere stroking there cocks on every lame and shitty post, on every crap piece of literature. This place is not, and has not been a writing forum. It never will be. People are given +2's on the most worthless picture posts, to crap drawings on MS-Paint. I think I know what Bart tried to do to this place but the losers will always infest what the great has made. And lower the standards of creativity and creation to their level just to not feel inferior. Which in real life is what they are?
Go perkman!
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:32:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Welcome back!
Take your meds, keep your helmet securely fastened - and edit, edit, edit. You should be just fine.
(Until yer next melt-down, of course.)
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:31:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My first degree is in sociology because when it came time to choose, I had more courses in that than in anything else. B.A.'s are relatively useless though. They're a stepping stone to something else, but shit on their own. You'll figure it out.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:29:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
at most schools you dont have to pick your major until the end of sophmore year, and even then you can switch it if you show commitment.
Well, Im a freshman, so I still have time, but I plan on doing biology, with a focus in evolutionary biology and neuroscience, and political science, with a focus in political philosophy and international relations.
In all honesty, I just love the classes within these majors...I mean, I genuinely like waking up at 8am to debate Plato or Locke or Rawls for an hour in class or to learn about consciousness within the prefrontal cortex.
I think you should do the same, just get the course guide from the colleges that youve been accepted to and just scroll through it and see what classes actually interest you and go from there.
Even the most seemingly useless majors have their benefits. Take Philosophy, everyone always asks, "well what the fuck are you going to do with that?"...Well Philosophy majors have the highest average score on the LSATs (for going to law school) out of any major, and believe it or not, some businesses pay Philosophy majors to go get their MBA because they love having them on their staff for a variety of reasons.
Also, if youre seriously getting offers from great schools...I dont know what your meaning of "great" is...for me its the Ivies and such...but I mean if youre getting a scholarship from say...Vanderbuilt or Notre Dame or USC or schools like that, dont fucking pass it up if you like the school...dont let your worrying over picking a major make you not go to a great school.
Submitted by PerkMan (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:15:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
8TRACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:06:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You have got to be fucking kidding here.
Submitted by 8track (user info) at 2007-01-30 21:03:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
PERKMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!