My Rebuttal To Axolotl (1723 hits)
Category: Computers & InternetLabels: heated
Rating: -0.76 on 93 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Maltese (View user info) at 2007-02-07 15:06:21 EST
Alright. Before you all fucking -2DIE me off the front page, just read this. I am going to give you the facts and the absolute truth. While I am quite an asshole, and while Axolotl is right about some things, he is misleading you for his own personal gain.
====
I debated posting this, but I was convinced and put together a few links. Yesterday I was playing Sissyfight (http://www.ubersite.com/m/98486, good game) with some Uberusers - Razor, Scourge, Apollo88, and someone else I think, when Maltese popped in and began his usual predictable 4chan trolling. Razor made a comment about Maltese's illegitimate pseudo-wife, and Maltese took offense, calling everyone internet addicts and generally making an ass of himself like the crackhead he is. Maltese started posting Apollo's address, while saying that posting addresses and plagiarism is wrong, and that he was not addicted to internet.
====
Alright. Yes, I went into Sissyfight and played a round with Razor, Scourge, Apollo, and someone else (not from Uber). Axe and Apollo convinced everyone to gang up on me. I had really been having a shitty day, and this set me off, really. I alluded to Apollo's address. I gave out the name of the street he lived on, nothing else. I also mentioned his first and last name. He's the one who posted it in the first place.
He posted his full name here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/91487#2092967
And his address here: http://www.ubersite.com/m/96644#2248224
As far as I'm concerned, if he willingly released that information on Ubersite, it's not illegal to use. I never used any of his personal information for malicious purposes - I just enjoyed pissing him off.
====
Mr. Rusty Hawkins, I'm calling you the fuck out. You, Maltese, are a plagiarist on other forums of Captainthorns songs, Forthewin ms paints (a repeat plagiarist no less), an undeniable internet addict, and an immature obsessed troll with absolutely nothing to do, unlimited time on his hands, no real wife, most likely a virgin, a compulsive pathological liar.
====
You're saying it's wrong to post names, right? You are such a blatant fucking hypocrite sometimes that it's seriously beyond my comprehension why someone hasn't assassinated you yet.
And you are not 16 years old, either.
(Which we should be thankful for, considering that you would probably be the downfall of our generation.)
Given statement: Maltese uses several names on other online forums, such as Marblefluss, floaterfluss, and Rusty Hawkins.
====
Yes. My alters are my pride and joy. Behold:
http://www.ubersite.com/u/marblefluss
http://www.ubersite.com/u/Hennessy
http://www.ubersite.com/u/bokinsmowls
http://www.ubersite.com/u/blackeyedbitch
http://www.ubersite.com/u/cera
====
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-09-21 19:08:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hello there. I am Rusty "Maltese" Hawkins from Ubersite. I see you have plagiarized this from me.
---------
Apollo outs Maltese here - http://www.ubersite.com/m/93436 , as well as his first account on this site: http://ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?user_id=23427
No wonder you started again that was quite the account!
Everything you ever wanted to know about marblefluss
User id: 23427
Registered on or around: 2005-11-18 23:05:09
# Messages posted: 8
# Reviews written: 7
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 140
# Hits: 0
Average rating of all messages: -1.40
====
Yes, I did plagiarize from Craigslist, I'll admit that. The account, however, was never meant to be serious - I just wanted to piss everyone off, and there's no better way to piss writers off than to stick blatant plagiarism on a website. Did you seriously think I thought I could get away with that? Everyone has fucking read that story. Sometimes, you just have to go that extra mile to piss people off.
A wonderful example of this is http://www.ubersite.com/m/98255
====
Running a simple Google search brings up that Maltese/Marblefluss/Floaterfluss has been active on literally dozens and dozens of websites, from Ubersite to Putfile to Wikipedia to Uncyclopedia to GaiaOnline to Pulsehead to 4chan to ytmnd to YouTube to gaming forums to god knows what else. As Maltese admits himself in his admin request for Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Requests_for_adminship/Floaterfluss he has an inordinate amount of time on his hands.
Maltese writes:
Self-nomination. I am a lean, mean, wikifying machine. Although I've only been here for while, I have so much time on my hands that it's almost sickening. In the short time I've been here, I have created 16 articles and removed 115+ instances of vandalism, among many other things. I created the Come As You Are: The Story of Nirvana article, the Scott Safran article, and the Walter Day article. I have also fixed 50+ links that originally linked to marijuana (a redirect), changing the links to go to the cannabis (drug) article. If I am made an admin, I promise to fight vandals so hard that they'll go crying back to their mothers. (talk) (contribs) 18:31, 1 January 2007 (UTC)
====
And they say I'm an internet-addicted creep? Hypocrite.
====
And this was right around the same time that Maltese was bitching that the Wikipedia Admins had taken down his Ubersite article! Please, fight these vandals, you're doing a good job making sure Wikipedia isn't a COMPLETE unreliable travesty of a source! Sickening amount of free time is right.
Indeed I wonder how Maltese has the time to take care of his "child" and lovely wife "Autumn," should they exist. I hope they don't exist, since if Maltese is spending such an amazing amount of time online.
Inordinate amount of time + bored 4chan troll + common sense = made-up family?
====
Yes, I do have an internet addiction and it's something I've been fighting against since early 2005. I've gone through several fits of depression and I find that the Internet comforts me above all else. I get hooked on it and spend hours of a time on it. I've been making damn sure to decrease my time on the internet (by March 2006 I spent about 12+ hours each day). Now it's only 2 hours per day, and I know that's still a lot, but it's a very big step for me.
====
Well we know Maltese isn't actually sixteen years old. Check out his profile on Anime website, GaiaOnline.com, as well as the screencaps at the bottom.
http://avatarsave.gaiaonline.com/profile/index.php?view=profile.ShowProfile&item=2809294
http://avatarsave.gaiaonline.com/journal/?u=2809294
Rusty Hawkins, a 21-year-old from Alabama? I guess it makes it more believable that you're a father and husband, though even more pathetic considering how immature you are.
====
If you're not even sure of my age here, what makes you think that one is true? I'm much more likely to be 16 than 21, considering my so-called "immaturity". Once again, you are extensively searching me and everything I've done. What's that sound? Wait, I know what it is! It's the sound of Axolotl's blatant fucking hypocrisy!!!
====
By the way, did you write this all by yourself? http://forums.putfile.com/viewtopic.php?p=99490&highlight=&PHPSESSID=2932aca8d730adc2f9ae821f23807faf It's a song to the tune of American Pie posted on Putfile. Note the similarities between that and Shenanigans Pie by Captainthorns http://ubersite.com/m/79919 - Captain thorns original. Look at the ends of the lines, the rhyme scheme, the entire passages lifted wholesale. You are a plagiarist, Maltese.
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Yes, I'll admit, I stole the basic idea and everything from Shenanigan Pie, but even Thorns' idea of parodying American Pie has been done so many times (hell, Weird Al's even done one). Yes, I knocked off the idea, but not the song as a whole. I changed it around to fit the Putfile community. I know that I'm a total fucking cunt for doing that. Forgive me.
====
The song was posted right before Maltese was banned, and he describes how he tried to kill himself after being kicked off Putfile for spamming. http://forums.putfile.com/viewtopic.php?t=11352&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0&PHPSESSID=2932aca8d730adc2f9ae821f23807faf
He said he was spamming because he was depressed that his girlfriend died.
====
So Maltese...this girlfriend that you claimed died in November 2005, she's obviously not Autumn, your present wife. Are we to understand that after your one girlfriend died, you got married and had a kid with another girl?
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She did not die, good sir. She dumped me but I didn't have the balls to admit it. It also happened a year before I said it did. Plus I wanted attention. I was pretty much in the same situation there as I am in here currently.
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Admit it Maltese, you don't have a wife, and you don't have a kid. You are an internet addict who has been banned from Uncyclopedia for plagiarizing Forthewin's MS Paints http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/User_talk:Marblefluss
====
I admit, I did take FTW's MS Paints, as well as PFF's and Gib's - BUT - I did give them credit. It was for an article called "Acid Trip" and I decided that mishmashing those together would be the perfect way to illustrate an acid trip. On the talk page, I provided links to Ubersite and their respective accounts.
====
You use an alter, cera, so obviously you don't even bother to hide that you use it to boost up your ratings. But let's look at your ratings:
[bunch of -2s]
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The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST). If this didn't happen and everyone was fair, I would have no need for an alter besides pissing people off.
====
Maltese, you are completely unlikable, not only in real life, but in the anonymous domain of the internet. And before you complain that you work for hours on post to receive poor ratings and -2s while people like Rad1101 get +2s: since you lie about your age, posting, family, internet-addiction, and plagiarism, do you really expect anything better?
====
Exactly what I meant. People should rate a POST for its value, not who posted it. Hell, if OathMeal made a really good post, I rated it as such. If it sucked, I'd -2 it.
====
Get off Ubersite now. You're not wanted here, and if your family actually isn't a figment of your stunted, trisomic imagination, you're neglecting your wife and child in a drastic way. Don't worry, nobody will miss you here.
====
Make me, you cunt. Like I'll actually listen to my pimply-faced statistics-obsessed archnemisis.
In short, Axe, you are nothing but an asshole, misusing your Ubersite popularity to mislead people into thinking I'm worse than Hitler. I'm not saying I'm perfect either, but seriously.
Fuck off and die.
User Reviews
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-07-23 08:14:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ho hum.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-02-13 08:23:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No seriously, I'm curious... Why do you hate my guts?
Submitted by CrazyProtractorFace (user info) at 2007-02-12 16:56:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up maltese.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:02:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
THIS is a rebuttal?
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-02-11 22:16:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
is he having a laugh?
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2007-02-10 13:04:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:40:13 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:28:31 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:22:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
i read this and i couldn't bring myself to give a shit.
i'm gonna go with the majority and assume that you're a douche
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:34:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ripple (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:36:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
maltese and ax both get on my nerves
Submitted by ripple (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:36:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
maltese and ax both get on my nerves
Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2007-02-09 22:35:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 Faggotry
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2007-02-09 08:57:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
FINALLY some decent uber drama, this place has been too quiet recently.
STFU Maltese, you have in no way justified anything you have done. If the deepest pits of hell are reserved for traitors then the one next to it is for pathetic internet twats like yourself.
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2007-02-09 08:39:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like coming here every few months for a reality check. Seeing how pathetic some users are just really cheers me up to no end. I should be good for quite a while after this sadass nerdfight.
Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-02-08 12:36:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-08 00:36:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST)."""
that's gayer than that time i sucked cock. seriously man, it's a fucking rating on a website, why would it bother you is beyond beyond me.
--
hahahahahahah!!!
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-02-08 12:27:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:13:53 (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up, Maltese.
aka Rusty Hawkins of Los Angeles CA
aka Eric D, rice of West Virginia
Didn't think I'd find that little link, did ya douchebag?
--------------
hahahahahhahha
Submitted by richardcranium (user info) at 2007-02-08 10:29:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
People actually affirm their lives by what #s they get on an internet site? Go outside.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-02-08 09:54:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF THINGS YOU'RE GETTING LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF 'HITS' SO THAT ON THE INTERNET YOUR USER INFORMATION CAN SHOW LOTS AND LOTS AND LOTS OF 'HITS' AND THAT'S WHAT REALLY COUNTS AT THE END OF THE DAY I MEAN LETS BE HONEST IF YOU HAVE LOTS OF 'HITS' AS A USER OF AN INTERNET SITE THEN THAT MEANS YOU'RE A COOL LITTLE PEANUT RIGHT?
Submitted by maf54 (user info) at 2007-02-08 09:51:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
:(
<hug>
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-08 09:22:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't be bad to him. It's just mean. I know it's the hangover talking, but someone just give the kid a hug.
Christ I think I'm still drunk
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-02-08 06:51:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-08 00:36:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST)."""
that's gayer than that time i sucked cock. seriously man, it's a fucking rating on a website, why would it bother you is beyond beyond me.
----------------
?
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2007-02-08 06:38:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking hell. You are such a loser.
I can't believe how much of a pathetic, dipshit, cocksucking retard you are. Seriously, take Skeletor's advice and kill yourself... yesterday.
Submitted by scum101 (user info) at 2007-02-08 06:24:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-08 05:54:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good man, tell him to fuck off.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-02-08 04:22:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-02-08 00:11:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
I cannot believe you think this is rebuttal.
____________________________
hehe
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2007-02-08 04:07:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you sound like greening. i'm sure he'd give you one of his therapists numbers if you mailed him and asked him nicely. however, if your govement handout only covers your intraweb bill and a months supply of ramen, remember this...
it's down the road, not across the street.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-02-08 03:18:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:28:41 (#)
Ranking: -2
For not knowing what a hypocrite actually is
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2007-02-08 02:52:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
TARD FIGHT!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-08 00:36:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST)."""
that's gayer than that time i sucked cock. seriously man, it's a fucking rating on a website, why would it bother you is beyond beyond me.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-02-08 00:11:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I cannot believe you think this is rebuttal.
Submitted by HawthorneHeights (user info) at 2007-02-07 23:40:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Didn't read it, but this is an auto +2 because Fagolotle doesn't know the difference between his cock and ubersite.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2007-02-07 22:52:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus H. Baldheaded Christ
Submitted by GMCrayon (user info) at 2007-02-07 22:04:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
JGreening much?
Submitted by lechuza (user info) at 2007-02-07 22:01:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST). If this didn't happen and everyone was fair, I would have no need for an alter besides pissing people off.
==============
Oathmeal used to say that
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-02-07 21:06:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Another reason is that most of Uber writes like shit.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-02-07 20:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:16:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
I've said it before and I'll officially state it again -
"I don't so much mind you, Maltese... just keep the nonsense off my posts."
I think you're just a bored, weird kid and I get righteously angry when alters & trolls -2spam my posts.
If you're behind or aware of some of the recent bullshit on MY posts: STOP IT.
If you're not, fair play... I don't mind a random Maltese visit.
But please, understand, there are those here that aren't as accomodating as me.
_______________
This illustrates the very reason people hesitate to post serious writing on this site.
Submitted by Life101 (user info) at 2007-02-07 20:49:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what is all the writing about'?
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2007-02-07 20:30:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Lame.
Submitted by 8track (user info) at 2007-02-07 20:04:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck you fucken suck maltese fucken hell
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-07 19:23:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You know why.
Submitted by mrnoisy (user info) at 2007-02-07 19:13:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
MALTESE $4$ LIFE
Submitted by Dolson (user info) at 2007-02-07 18:39:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up, Maltese
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-02-07 18:30:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:29:54 (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck Maltese,
I didn't think you were so fucked in the head. ITs just the internet dude.
--
hahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!
Submitted by sweetcheebs (user info) at 2007-02-07 18:11:46 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you are a sad individual, oh and you never responded to the part about you not actually having a wife.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:40:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:28:31 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:22:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
i read this and i couldn't bring myself to give a shit.
i'm gonna go with the majority and assume that you're a douche
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:27:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You don't need Uber dude. You need a therapist.
Submitted by DirtyHarry (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:17:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Cyrus (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:11:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:31:36 (#)
Ranking: -2
When I look into your eyes, I can see straight into the back of your head [1]
----------------------------------------------------------
A Blue Oyster Cult reference! Except Ax is so young he's crediting ETS for this. Doggone kids, what's the young generation coming to?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-07 17:05:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:31:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:09:07 (#)
Ranking: -2
AS A RESPONSE TO YOU POSTING IT SEVERAL TIMES THAT DAY I WAS TRYING DAMAGE CONTROL YOU LITTLE SHIT.
IF YOU SCROLL DOWN THE PAGE YOU WILL SEE THAT.
===
wow...now i understnad why people hate him
i'm catching on! :-D
===
Caul has made me laugh more today than any of you.
You are all a bunch of pitiful fucking failures.
Shape up.
Stay on the front page little post.
Submitted by Snare (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:59:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
..and off the front page you go....
Submitted by awesome_face (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:58:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This is like listening to somebody trying to justify genocide.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:46:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Not cool.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:42:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:43:21 (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, don't make a new name and start over. You'll eventually out yourself.
Find a totally new website and start over with a new community, and try to do a better job next time.
-------------------
Yeah, you know. Like Oathmeal did....repeatedly. And is currently doing.
.
.
.
*cough*
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:39:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You told some truth. But the truth you told was about lies you'd told earlier.
And you avoided some fairly major points.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:35:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Didn't read it.
Stop breathing.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:34:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you guys are all fucking childish - what's wrong with you?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:31:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:09:07 (#)
Ranking: -2
AS A RESPONSE TO YOU POSTING IT SEVERAL TIMES THAT DAY I WAS TRYING DAMAGE CONTROL YOU LITTLE SHIT.
IF YOU SCROLL DOWN THE PAGE YOU WILL SEE THAT.
===
wow...now i understnad why people hate him
i'm catching on! :-D
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:29:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck Maltese,
I didn't think you were so fucked in the head. ITs just the internet dude.
Submitted by retrospect (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:28:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:22:51 (#)
Ranking: -2
i read this and i couldn't bring myself to give a shit.
i'm gonna go with the majority and assume that you're a douche
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:22:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i read this and i couldn't bring myself to give a shit.
i'm gonna go with the majority and assume that you're a douche.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:21:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Still-Life (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:08:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nobody likes liars.
The road to success-
1) Stop lying.
2) Find a new internet place to hang out at. Without lying. Or even better, find shit to do IN REAL LIFE.
3) Stop failing.
Trolling boards is boring as fuck and to anyone who has been around the block before on the internet knows everything that comes from your mouth is unoriginal as fuck.
Once you start being yourself you might find that (some) people will start to like you for it.
Unless you're a child-raping liar and a plagiarist. Then you should just become An Hero.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:06:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:03:11 (#)
Ranking: -2
All I know is that since your head popped up on Uber (much like a puss filled whitehead), Bart's asshole has never been cleaner since you spend an inordinate amount of time licking it.
Here are the 2 reasons why I intend to -2 EVERY SINGLE POST you & your alters make:
1) You're an annoying little shit
2) Your rape-isn't-so-bad post. That was the most asinine thing I've read in a long time. Anyone assholish enough to write something like that deserves to be tarred & feathered and driven out of the village.
As I'm found of telling lost causes,
"Buy a bullet and rent a gun."
FUCK OFF
---------
This response deserves a +2... Seriously, if he kills himself, I will give Forensic AND Axy $50. Each.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:03:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:03:11 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
All I know is that since your head popped up on Uber (much like a puss filled whitehead), Bart's asshole has never been cleaner since you spend an inordinate amount of time licking it.
Here are the 2 reasons why I intend to -2 EVERY SINGLE POST you & your alters make:
1) You're an annoying little shit
2) Your rape-isn't-so-bad post. That was the most asinine thing I've read in a long time. Anyone assholish enough to write something like that deserves to be tarred & feathered and driven out of the village.
As I'm found of telling lost causes,
"Buy a bullet and rent a gun."
FUCK OFF
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:00:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:43:21 (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, don't make a new name and start over. You'll eventually out yourself.
Find a totally new website and start over with a new community, and try to do a better job next time.
----
or - get this - try getting your fat, no conch-having-ass, away from the computer for a while and making some real, actual, flesh and blood real life (no, not irl, real life) friends. youll see that geniune face to face interaction with people is much more fun and challenging, particularly because you are not really able to fuck with others privacy from behind the ostensible safety and basic social seecurity of the 'anonimity' of the internet, you gutless turd.
ps. i use 'gutless' in a figurative sense. from your photos you clearly have more gut than you should. while youre out making flesh friends, lose some weight too. maybe youll actually find yourself a real live girlfriend, rather than the inflatable bed you painted yellow and put eyes and a mouth on.
pps. if you had any class or clue, youd have just taken axolotls post on the chin and lived with it.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-02-07 16:00:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
So your 'rebuttal' is that you may be an emo, lying, plagiarizing, spamming, attention-starved, internet-addicted, untalented waste of space... but that's okay, because Ax is a hypocrite... because he spends a lot of his time online...
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:59:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
im maltese's alter
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:57:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Normally I'd -2 this but SINCE APOLLO IS VERY ANNOYED it deserves a +2.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:48:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
interesting
Submitted by Manitou (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:48:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
~OathMeal Approved~
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The solution is simple - stop acting like such a turd, people will like you just fine.
I think yer entertaining - and even though you act like retard at times - you still add to my overall enjoyment level so you are good times in my books.
Less jackass - more cool. I know you can do it.
...and stop it with the lying and the plagiarizing. That is just stupid.
Pissing people off is one thing - I piss people off all the time... just for being ME!
That is truly rewarding.
Submitted by Razor (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:43:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, don't make a new name and start over. You'll eventually out yourself.
Find a totally new website and start over with a new community, and try to do a better job next time.
Submitted by KindaNews (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:39:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Why don't you two steal an ID and get a room.
Submitted by webcorona (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:38:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
will this one do it?
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:38:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well, i'd like to see this back on the front page.
my official rating is -2
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:32:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:31:36 (#)
Ranking: -2
When I look into your eyes, I can see straight into the back of your head [1]
[1] Electrictoothsyndrome, 2004
-------
/\
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|
that is known as citing sources
-------------
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAH!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:31:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
When I look into your eyes, I can see straight into the back of your head [1]
[1] Electrictoothsyndrome, 2004
-------
/\
|
|
that is known as citing sources
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:28:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
For not knowing what a hypocrite actually is
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:27:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you've had trouble on other websites.
all of your alters here have shitty average ratings.
you have a shitty average rating.
This is not a conspiracy, Maltese. We don't like your stuff. After posting your little ass off here and annoying everyone, it's grown into more than us not liking your posts. We don't like you. You could create a gem tomorrow and post it but you're going to get a bad rating because we don't like YOU. You had your chance to be just another shitty writer on uber but you passed on it and, instead, became a little shit AND a shitty writer.
You make alters to combat the 'auto -2 Maltese DIE' but your alters make posts and nobody really likes them.
Shut the fuck up, Maltese.
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:26:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:25:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You're a fucking douche.
I bet you haven't seen the sun in 4 years, Virg.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:23:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It was all for a thesis about internet traffic, right?
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:22:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Yes, I'll admit, I stole the basic idea and everything from Shenanigan Pie, but even Thorns' idea of parodying American Pie has been done so many times (hell, Weird Al's even done one). Yes, I knocked off the idea, but not the song as a whole. I changed it around to fit the Putfile community. I know that I'm a total fucking cunt for doing that. Forgive me.
---
Removing whole lines from the original that were unchanged in my version, and taking out the words you dropped in place of some of mine, this is exactly "the basic idea and everything" that you took:
And I knew if I wrote my posts
That I could make them laugh the most
But November 6th, it made me shiver
With every link I clicked, I'd quiver -
Bad news bold in headlines,
Portents, omens, and bad signs.
So bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
Did you write a ____ post?
And have you
Have you seen Tubgirl's wretched flow?
And do you believe ____ bull?
Well I knew that you liked menz most ghey
When ____ blew a kiss your way -
You rubbed each others' necks,
Y halo thar, buttsecks.
I was a lonely mid-aged office lout
With useless facts and a ____ account,
But I was fucked, I had no doubt,
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
When _____ marched out to the sea
Hidden on the back of a swamp donkey
And ____ bounced the sun high 'pon his knee.
With ____ stumbling, in his cups,
Shots of ____ snatch, they went up,
The bum's ass, it was licked,
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
Rapefest, bare breasts, in the ___ burning,
The n00bs popped up like a plunger, churning
_____ posts out the ass
They served baked goods, like a cookie lass,
_______ made a march en masse,
While ____ stroked his sideburns, eating bass.
________ too soon?"
Was the bass line to the ____ tune,
____ flooded up the page,
____________ posts drew ___'s rage,
Did you see ____ cry in his cage
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
In there we were all safe to lurk
A generation bored at work
With no hope for promotions then,
So come on ______ this joint,
____ wrote posts with__ a point
'Cause Goatse is the devil's only friend.
And as I read these new replies,
The anger built up deep inside,
And as a flame war burned all through the night,
With bullsh1t taunts thrown left and right,
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
I asked if I could see her boobs,
I Googled ____ once again,
The way I had when I began,
But the engine said the query went astray.
But not a word was posted,
______ were hosted.
And the _____, they numbered three:
They walked through the far-strewn debris
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
Bye, bye Miss Shenanigan Pie,
Drove my K-car to the gay bar and found
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:22:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I love how quickly this was dropped from the front page.
Shut the fuck up, Maltese.
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:17:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Hail Hitler.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:16:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've said it before and I'll officially state it again -
"I don't so much mind you, Maltese... just keep the nonsense off my posts."
I think you're just a bored, weird kid and I get righteously angry when alters & trolls -2spam my posts.
If you're behind or aware of some of the recent bullshit on MY posts: STOP IT.
If you're not, fair play... I don't mind a random Maltese visit.
But please, understand, there are those here that aren't as accomadating as me.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:15:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post
------
This earns you -2s for life.
There's no point in even discussing anything with you - I didn't think it possible for someone to become even MORE pathetic than Oathmeal, but you have succeeded - at he least he was entertaining from time to time, you're not even that.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:13:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up, Maltese.
aka Rusty Hawkins of Los Angeles CA
aka Eric D, rice of West Virginia
Didn't think I'd find that little link, did ya douchebag?
Submitted by BadSamaritan87 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:13:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:12:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
so you have been hounded off every website you ever been on?
starting to notice a common denominator you pathetic little turd?
Submitted by Foolproof (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:12:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"The only reason I use an alter is to counter the people who -2 me without even rating my post (i.e., rating the POSTER and not the POST). If this didn't happen and everyone was fair, I would have no need for an alter besides pissing people off."
-----------------
Life's not fair, ninny.
Uber is more unfair than life.
Quit your fucking whining.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:10:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Sigh. I figured that I'd get credit for the song you stole in the rebuttal, given that I corrected Ax on his post.
But no.
I do like that you kept the line about 'swamp donkey' in, however. Apparently you were too assed to completely change all the lyrics around to suit your needs?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:10:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/97819
what about that then greening??
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-07 15:09:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
AS A RESPONSE TO YOU POSTING IT SEVERAL TIMES THAT DAY I WAS TRYING DAMAGE CONTROL YOU LITTLE SHIT.
IF YOU SCROLL DOWN THE PAGE YOU WILL SEE THAT.


