Sorry it's so long but there's some major asskissery going on here and it's 3:15 in the morning and I'm really drunk and I can still type. I like some of you idiots a lot. (2331 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.7 on 118 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Lungfish (View user info) at 2007-02-10 05:15:48 EST
I'm drunk I'm fucking drunk. Drunker that I've been in a while. Happy drunk though. I almost never get angry-drunk. Last time was in Cincinnati, and the guy I got angry at kicked me in the balls. No permanent damage, I'm happy to report. Jesus. That was almost 20 years ago. And the guy who kicked me in the nads was and is a good friend of mine. I just don't do tequila anymore. I deserved it, but he's been afraid of my retribution ever since. I swear I'm going to hit him with that chair some day.
I'm reporting to you tonight my feeble, and very short, assessments of a few Uber folks - specifically those that have reviewed my posts at least five times. Why? Because I'm essentially lazy and not creative...which is to say I'm drunk and am out of ideas. Fuck it. Suck it. Also because I said I would. Tonight, I think. I don't know. I'm fucking drunk. Nurrr.
I would also like to report that I have really enjoyed my time here, ya fucks. It's been about three months, and I've had a ...well...interesting time. I've actually learned a few things, too. That's for another post...maybe when sober.
That being said, thank god for spell check, smallish boobs, beer, and whiskey. And beef jerky. Not turkey jerky. Whoever thought of that is just a fucking...whatever...I can't think of anything. Here's my fucking, asskissering list, in the order that shows up on the fucking whatever web thing site dot dot dot www http goddamn thing that I don't understand but that I bookmarked:
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forensicgirl3: Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. In a word: sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. And she has small breasts, to boot. These, I love. I'm talking about the boobs. Small boobs are the best. Holy lord, she's sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. Holy lord, she's sexy. I hope I'm not focusing too much on the small boobs. Good lord, I love those.
Crystle: Sweet and beautiful. Took me under her wings (whatever...I'm drunk) and comforted me after a couple Uber follies. FUCK YOU PEOPLE I'M DRUNK AND HAVING FUN. Crystle's a gem. I didn't mean that to be punny, but that's how it came out.
Bubba: Good guy. Haven't talked to Bubba in a while. He made my list of badasses, which is something to brag about (in my mind). Don't know if I pissed him off or not. Hey Bubba, how's tricks?
Maltese: Enigma. Seems to like me a lot. I like him too, as I've told him, when I'm drunk. Honestly, when I'm sober I think, "What the fuck, man?" Decent guy, methinks, with lots of talent. Spends a lot of unguided energy. One thing: "Speed kills." That phrase has been around a long time. Be careful, my friend.
redskieslookfake: Brilliant, from what I've seen, and I haven't seen enough. Very nice. The last, in my mind, is about the highest honor I can bestow upon somebody. Nice. Such a mundane word. Yet it means so much.
Okay...I really drunk now. Sorry.
Axolotl: Genius, from what I'm told and have seen. Very pleasant...to me anyway. He's going places. I wish you the best. Thanks for the nice reviews.
Phuzzygish: I've only recently become of this guy's post, but I'd like to say: Keep 'em coming. Could I be any more lame?
LittleMonster: Ahhhh. My future wife. I like you posts very much. Are you sure you won't live in Colorado City? Post more, sweet cherub. I'll build you a gazebo in our yard. I have no idea is your breasts are small and beautiful.
Sacrilicious: Ahhhh. My future ex-wife. I don't think I could ever satiate your passionate and relentless desires. I'm not sure what I'm talking about. You're sexy, too, despite the goth thing. I really don't know what I'm talking about any more. Thanks for being so nice. (See redskies, above.) Sexy. Artistic and such. I'm not good at that. Awesome for loving Camper Van Beethoven. I thought I was the only one. <heart-shaped thing here>
rob_berg: This guy is cool. I wish I were playing poker with him right now instead of writing this shit. I like his politics, and his web-demeanor. Decent fellow. I wish the sexiest woman on Uber didn't hate him. Alas...I'm drunk.
The_taste_of_Monkeys: I'm not sure why somebody of this caliber would rate me so highly, but there it is. Suck it, fuckers. Nyeh nyeh. And he's Scottish to boot. So am I, in my world. So: Suck it, fuckers.
Ducky: Ahhhh. Jesus. Sweetness and beauty defined. What a lovely girl.
Okay...I've got to get to bed soon. Man, I'm a good typist. See, my spellcheck told me that typer was not a word. Anyway, I've got to make these brief. As stated before, I lame, or that's what I implied:
CaptainThorns: Recently became aware of him. One of the smarter guys on Uber, methinks.
Sinistral: Made my list of badasses for a photo of him playing soccer. Seems decent (which is saying a lot).
rad1101: Coolest guy on Uber. I really don't mean to kiss his ass so much. It just happens.
Danger_Ranger: Funniets guy on Uber. I really don't mean to kiss his ass so much. It just happens.
Director: A very interesting person. Reminds me more of me than anybody else here, except I've never had a DUI.
Thorpe: Second funniest person on Uber. I think I scared him a bit by saying that I wanted to kill him and then fuck him. Just a lame joke. I do that.
Amontillado: Very cute. Shy. Retiring. I always think of Edgar Allan Poe when I see her name. (For: The Cask of Amontillado - one of his short stories)
rorrim: Strange dude. I like him. I like him more than messmind. Has some funny comments.
joedaddy: Good guy.
Orgasmatron: Talented, I'm sure. Sometimes I wish I like poetry a bit more.
By the way, Orgasmatron average rating of my posts is 1.3. They go down quickly after this.
kuroneko_sama: Probably the first time I've spelled this name correctly. Or did I. He's frustrating. A good guy, I think, but needs some learnin', if I can put it into Kentucky terms. YOU NEED SOME LEARNIN', BOY. I think he's alright.
ih8tu2man: I don't know. I've rated this guy pretty highly, I think. What can I say? He seems like a decent chap.
Jesus, this is longer that I thought it would be. I apologize. I'll be more brief.
Newty: 14 years old now. Jesus.
Messmind: see rorrim, above.
Zebra: Actually seems to like me more than a lot of you.
Doodles: ?
Stagger Lee: Great writer. Takes this shit seriously.
The Uniter: I like that fucker.
Sicosemen: Didn't like me till recently. Probably on account of all my anti-penis reviews, which I stand by.
Apollo88: I really have no idea. Doesn't like me much.
Frankthebear: I really have no idea. Doesn't like me much. And I've supported him through his recent whatever. FUCK YOU FRANKIE!!
locksly: I don't know. This kid's pretty interesting. Doesn't rate me well, however. Fucker.
Shlongy: My average rating from Shlongy is 0.31, which, I think, is not bad, considering the source. I like Shlongy. He's a lot like me, albeit with money and prestige. This is to say, I guess, that he drinks and smoke a lot.
Finally:
JonnyX: Of everyone who has rated my posts - extremely shitty or only somewhat shitty - at least five time, this guy hits me the hardest. Really, I'm too drunk to wonder why.
User Reviews
Submitted by beeltea (user info) at 2007-05-20 05:34:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
3:15 eh?
I love that time.
Submitted by Manitou (user info) at 2007-02-13 22:25:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.rip.tv/video/watch/782/
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2007-02-13 00:06:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
ok
Submitted by Santa_Claus_ (user info) at 2007-02-12 21:17:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This sucked.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-12 21:07:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
YOU WERE LOWER UNTIL YOU +2'D THIS!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-12 16:23:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you numbnuts
JonnyX (user info) 0 on 10 = 0.00
lungfish (user info) -15 on 164 = -0.09
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-12 16:18:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
really? i'll have to check into that
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:52:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ctrl F
+'scourge'
+nothing
__________
fuck you
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:14:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Rãtîng: 1.75 on 109 rëvîëws (Rætë this itëm) (V) (Lãbël thîs ítëm) X
SÜbmîttëd by LÜngfísh (Vîëw Üser ínfo) at 2007-02-10 05:15:48
HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !HÆT !
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:40:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOO!
And thanks! I'm flattered!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-02-12 03:17:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
CRYSTLE MADE A LIST!!!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-02-12 11:12:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cheers.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-02-12 08:41:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
CaptainThorns: Recently became aware of him. One of the smarter guys on Uber, methinks.
--------------
I'll take that compliment. :)
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-12 07:05:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Have fun at the movies darlin. What you going to see? I can't get enough of salted popcorn.
Is your other wife sickly then? I'm sad to hear that? Whats wrong?
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-02-12 03:17:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
CRYSTLE MADE A LIST!!!
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2007-02-12 03:17:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thnaks dude. I have no idea what you were trying to say about me, but hey. At least I made a list, so thnaks bru. :)
Submitted by frankthebear (user info) at 2007-02-11 23:32:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Frankthebear: I really have no idea. Doesn't like me much. And I've supported him through his recent whatever. FUCK YOU FRANKIE!!
________________________________________________
whatever gave you that idea? I don't dislike you, I hardly know you!
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 22:24:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
So true, Bubba.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-02-11 15:25:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Lungfish, take care of those kids and enjoy them now. My kids are now 38, 37, 33, and in 12 days the youngest will be 28. I have 7 grandkids ages five to nineteen and one due in about 6 months.
Yes, I am an old fart.
Next thing you know your kid will be an adult and you will wonder where the time went...
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 15:09:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus. Get well. I was afraid I was going to have two sick wives. I don't need that.
The kid and I are going to the movies. I love popcorn.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-11 14:37:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good for you. Kids are good for the soul. Any special plans?
I'm fine. Just had a pretty nasty accident a couple of months ago and broke my arms badly (fingers, wrists, hands and an elbow). Everything was going fine, but I had a bit of a fall today and a couple of fingets popped out. Something also went in my wrist, so I have been pilled up and crashed out until the swelling goes down. It'll be grand by tomorrow........*looks hopefull*........I can still type, albeit very slowly. So it cant be that bad.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 14:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-11 13:42:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Cuddle greatfully accepted. *feels better*
Oh goody some kind soul has brought me food. yummy.
Happy day!
Why's your sister so awesome. I'm not doubting that she is, but why is she even more awesome today than yesterday?
------------
She sent me Othello, with Orson Welles. Then I watched it.
Are you okay, healthwise?
I'm going to enjoy the day with my kid. Sober, too.
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-02-11 14:02:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2007-02-11 13:44:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*points
DRUNK!
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-11 13:42:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cuddle greatfully accepted. *feels better*
Oh goody some kind soul has brought me food. yummy.
Happy day!
Why's your sister so awesome. I'm not doubting that she is, but why is she even more awesome today than yesterday?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 07:07:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Let me offer you this web-cuddle, sweet one: <cuddle cuddle cuddle> I understand it's Sunday AM there. Here, too. 5 am and I need to got to bed.
Don't fear the other women. I'm not getting anywhere with them, anyway, except maybe FG. And I'm married and shit. You can swing in the hammock as well. It would be nice. I don't smoke weed anymore, though.
'Night
PS, I love my sister more than I did yesterday. She's awesome.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:51:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I dont know what it is, but i get the feeling that your not taking our pending union very seriously. I can't say no to any of these women because I like them. I can however object to you marryinng them as well.
Read the menu all you want, but always go home for lunch.
Pain killers kicking in............all is well with the world. I would like to be sat outside in the sunshine, yet today I have been bannished to bed. Boooooooooooo. I'm burbling. Sorry. I just really feel like being outdoorsy today and instead I've been told in no uncirtain terms to lie still.. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO>
I need a cuddle. That would make being banished to bed lots of fun.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:39:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For a mormon , she went almost all the way . I was never dissapointed . HMMMM , those were good times ,aswell .
And concerning grolsch : http://www.grolsch.nl/denieuwefles/Default.aspx?pid=93
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:25:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:14:09 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:00:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Pfft. You Americans ! I like that guy. Some day I'll post about the Mormon woman I was with for a while. She was not a hotty, but she had an exquisite ass. I never got a bj, though. Fucking mormon people! Got to visit the states again , this year ! Keep breathing , fire needs air !
-----------
Ha! Love it.
You didn't get the right Mormon, let me tell you.
ps, I love Grolsch.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:14:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:00:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Pfft. You Americans ! I like that guy. Some day I'll post about the Mormon woman I was with for a while. She was not a hotty, but she had an exquisite ass. I never got a bj, though. Fucking mormon people! Got to visit the states again , this year ! Keep breathing , fire needs air !
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 06:00:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Pfft. Dutch people. I like that guy. Some day I'll post about the Dutch woman I was with for a while. She was not a prostitute, but she was a masseuse. I never got a message, though. Fucking Dutch people.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-11 05:50:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now i've got a hangover !
Just adding some sparks to the heat ...
Sundaymorning now , over here , Going to sweat it off in the sauna .
Have a fabulous day ,you all !
Submitted by Snakelby (user info) at 2007-02-11 04:57:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a lot to live up to if I ever post drunk! Cheers...
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2007-02-11 03:25:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
woooo!
I AM cool - in my own special nerdy way.
God bless you, hippy. Happy weekend!
Excellent post.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-11 01:49:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Zebra's a chick. Awesome.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-02-11 00:13:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
dont rate you well will i?
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2007-02-11 00:01:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Anything with my name in it gets a +2.
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2007-02-10 23:45:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
suprised i was even mentioned
im cool with it
and tull kicks ass
*listening to "teacher"*
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-02-10 22:54:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate that I have DUI's.
:-(
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-10 21:53:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I was 10 years old when stevie ray died
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-02-10 18:04:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 17:32:45 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm going to marry Anansie, too.
===
Get in line.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 17:32:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm going to marry Anansie, too.
Would that be alright LM?
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:53:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
:(
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:37:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
One more thing:
"Pibroch is lovely."
I'm in love.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:33:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:26:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
Shakespeare coined hundreds of words. Look it up.
Jethro Tull is great.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_English_words_invented_by_Shakespeare
BRING ME MY BROAAAADSWORDD
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:26:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:20:45 (#)
Ranking: 1
i don't dislike you.
--------
This makes me happy. I'm camping on my own post, which is embarrassing. Later.
I'm going to go make my kid some ravioli. I'm an awesome daddy.
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:26:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shakespeare coined hundreds of words. Look it up.
Jethro Tull is great.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:20:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i don't dislike you.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:18:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
But, if I were laying in a hammock listening to Tull, there'd be no problem.
------
*with FG, that is.
I'm awesome.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:15:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I've never seen Tull/Anderson, but I saw Stevie Ray Vaughan three times. I'm awesome.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:14:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Okay. I'm plus 2'ing all of those. I'll read later. I don't like reading when I'm drinking.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:13:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sitttting on a paaaaaaark bench.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:13:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
anchovy
Good to know. Indeed, I did not know that. I hate anchovies though.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:13:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've seen Ian Anderson and Co live. They were pretty fucking good.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:13:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweet Jebus! What is wrong with me?! I'm missing prime linkwhoring opportunities here.
Hey Lung, speaking of Tull, read this. (true story) http://www.ubersite.com/m/76239
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:12:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
NO TEQUILA FOR ME!!!!!!!!!
Bourbon and beer. That's it.
Actually, I haven't smoked a joint in ten years. But, if I were laying in a hammock listening to Tull, there'd be no problem.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:11:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:10:35 (#)
Ranking: 0
Redskies. Expect a blagard of +2s. You're awesome. I'm awesome too, for making up the word "blagard," and for having a Sinatra collection...on vinyl...and Songs from the Wood...on vinyl.
Shakespeare made up words. He was awesome too, even if he didn't have a Sinatra collection.
---
Shakespeare coined the word 'anchovy.' How fucking awesome is that?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:10:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
At any rate, the hammock idea sounds fun. You can keep the doobage though. It just slows me down.
I'm a tequila drinker.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:10:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Redskies. Expect a blagard of +2s. You're awesome. I'm awesome too, for making up the word "blagard," and for having a Sinatra collection...on vinyl...and Songs from the Wood...on vinyl.
Shakespeare made up words. He was awesome too, even if he didn't have a Sinatra collection.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:03:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hell. I get naughty thoughts watching Scooby Doo. It doesn't take much. Daphne's hot.
I'm awesome.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:02:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As I'm feeling flattered - linkwhoring
http://www.ubersite.com/m/84762 wry political commentary
http://www.ubersite.com/m/83934 soppy shit
http://www.ubersite.com/m/80514 comedy
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-10 16:01:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hehehehehe, do you get naughty thoughts when you listen to "Hunting Girl?" The Lady of the land seducing the field hand, wearing her leather riding boots and using her crop?
Pibroch is lovely. Martin Barre makes that guitar sound bittersweet.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 15:57:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Sweet. I'd actually have to say that I like "Minstrel in the Gallery" best of all. But I have "Songs from the Wood" on vinyl. Yeah...I'm fucking old. Awesome, too, for the vinyl thing. I have lots of Sinatra, too, on vinyl. I'm old. And awesome. For the vinyl thing.
ps, I'm getting drunk again.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-10 15:51:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
But Lungfish.....they call me Skeletor.
Thank you though. Songs from the Wood was actually the first JT album I bought. What can I say, I was hooked.
I'd say my next favorite album of theirs was Minstrel in the Gallery. I get all emo when I hear "Requiem" and "One White Duck/0 to the power of 10 = nothing at all."
Can't go wrong with Aqualung. I love "Hymn 43" and "Wind Up." Ian Anderson has such distain for the Church of England!
Their early Blues work is fantastic.
Can you believe they're not in the Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame?!
Criminal, simply criminal!
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 15:41:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck. I missed Homer42. This was an honest mistake. So here:
homer42: Interesting guy, for sure. I went retaliatory on his ass one when even drunker than last night. He never held it against me. Thanks for that. Rates honestly, methinks. That is, he calls it like he sees it. Hate his politics, but probably somebody I could have a beer with.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 15:38:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:47:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll try and post more.
---
good
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 15:37:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by emmakwon (user info) at 2007-02-10 10:43:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
forensicgirl3: Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. In a word: sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. And she has small breasts, to boot. These, I love. I'm talking about the boobs. Small boobs are the best. Holy lord, she's sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. Holy lord, she's sexy. I hope I'm not focusing too much on the small boobs. Good lord, I love those.
ahahaha stalker.... too awesome
-----
i'm no stalker. actually happily married. not sure "happily" is the right word. married, nonetheless, and staying that way. And not stalking. Some day my wife will have sex with me again. Maybe not this year, but some day.
FG just got special attention for being first on the list (ie, rating my shitty posts higher than anyone else). and for being hot. I see us one day laying in a hammock, smoking a doob, and listening to Jethro Tull...Songs from the Wood, maybe.
i think I'm drunk again. I love weekends.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:47:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll try and post more.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:45:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:30:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
Good lord. My head hurts. Thanks. Method and Unabonger, and whoever else didn't make my drunk list but...
I need som coffee
----
oh yeah...you weren't on the list. sorry. I'm gonna eat some soup.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:35:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
gazebo?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 14:30:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Good lord. My head hurts. Thanks. Method and Unabonger, and whoever else didn't make my drunk list but...
I need som coffee
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2007-02-10 13:59:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Life is good...
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2007-02-10 13:04:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"What's ya gonna do about the Lungfish joe"?
"Well, now that you've called me by name"...
<onceuponatimeinthewest>
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:56:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Me getting drunk too.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:44:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:35:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
I have C-cups.
+2 no penis.
Why don't you post something ? Chromosomes don't show up in ratings !
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:42:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Edgar Allan Poe, the weird girl from the Breakfast Club, it's all the same to me.
Submitted by TechnoRatty (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:36:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'cos you lived in Kemnay, and your drunk!
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:35:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I have C-cups.
+2 no penis.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:33:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oops.. I meant to +2 this
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:33:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
*cough cough*
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:29:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha! Just opened up a really cold one . It's 'export' on the label , but it's not a Heineken .
We ship those everywhere on the globe , except to the place they're made ... No this one is probably exported from some arabic country ....Cheers , Fish ! I salute ya !
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-02-10 12:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Where in the fuck is the Unabonger love?
Submitted by ih8u2man (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:52:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ih8tu2man: I don't know. I've rated this guy pretty highly, I think. What can I say? He seems like a decent chap.
-------------
Right back at ya.
Submitted by strwbryfanatic (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:24:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
What do I have to do to make a damn list around here?
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:20:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like you. I called you the coolest and most likable new user. But, unlike these other rubes, I don't get mad when people don't include me in their circle jerk posts. WTF, you are actually upset because some stranger on the internet forgot you? For fuck's sake, you crazy narcissist, it's the internet, I forget about most of you as soon as I step away from the computer.
Except method. Because he's spying on me with that damn street sign post that I pass by everytime I go any-fucking-where. STAY AWAY WILLARD, NOBODY LIKES YOUR STUPID RATS EXCEPT YOU.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2007-02-10 11:13:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Quality drunk post
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-10 10:58:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You sure it wasn't her stubble?
<runs for his life>
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-02-10 10:56:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-02-10 09:17:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
and if you kiss her she gets this funny little rash on her chin on account of your (well 'my'), swarthy, rugged, bonafide he-man stubble.
===
HAHAHAHA LIKE YOU EVER KISSED A GIRL
(That's the sweestest thing I've read Danger make up).
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-02-10 10:54:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now THIS is a drunk post I can approve of. You're sweet. But I only wish to get married once, so you'd be stuck with me.
For the record, I'm most certainly not goth. Just a photoshop effect on my last photo- my hair is actually (dyed)dark red, it's not really not purple. p.s.- 34B.
Submitted by emmakwon (user info) at 2007-02-10 10:43:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
forensicgirl3: Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. In a word: sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. And she has small breasts, to boot. These, I love. I'm talking about the boobs. Small boobs are the best. Holy lord, she's sexy. Holy lord, she's sexy. Smart, strong, beautiful, and opinionated. Holy lord, she's sexy. I hope I'm not focusing too much on the small boobs. Good lord, I love those.
ahahaha stalker.... too awesome
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-10 09:59:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
= (
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-02-10 09:17:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here's a funny one for you Lungfish. I spent three weeks in Ireland with Ducky, and it was the best consecutive three weeks of my life. When she laughs you smile like a cretin while your insides ache, and if you kiss her she gets this funny little rash on her chin on account of your (well 'my'), swarthy, rugged, bonafide he-man stubble.
naturally I shaved every night.
rolfcopter lolz
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-02-10 09:13:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2ing this for 1 obvious reason.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2007-02-10 08:54:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think of Lungfish as the male version of Merlina.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-02-10 08:29:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I dont think Im actually capable of living up to the standard my own legend seems to have set, so just expect total shite from now on.
Same as always then.
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-02-10 07:38:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I could really go for a stiff drink right about now
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:54:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sinistral's a dude?
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:47:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was sweet.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:42:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that is a lot of asskissing.
Don't worry yourself over the vicious, anonymous murder/rape threat, if I got scared every time someone said they wanted to fornicate with my dead body I'd be a nervous wreck.
PS. SECOND funniest? I lost out to Danger_Ranger???
Of ALL the people to lose out to.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:41:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I will give alot more concideration my lovely, moving to Colorado City that is. I deffinately want the Gazebo. I have a problem with posting. I hope to get it sorted soon, but I will have to stop drinking first. I'm gutted to tell you that my boobs are anything but small. *weeps* I hope this doesn't affect the way you feel about me, be gentle as I am awesomely hungover (still drunk) and a bit sensitive.
Maybe i should do a camwhore for my next post.......*ponders*
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm going to write an asskissing post for people who have reviewed my stuff at least 100 times.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:17:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I understand. I thought I'd be passe out by now.
I be hungover soon.
Happy birtheay agoain
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:15:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You'll understand, I'm hung over.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:15:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I messed up
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:15:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
shit
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:14:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:01:57 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:59:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
AND I have given you an average rating of 1.75!!
pah. damn drunken yank.
----------
blame bart. did you rate my shitty posts five times? man, I can still type.
but I'm in trouble with the wife tomorrow.
-------
4 times :o(
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:01:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:59:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
AND I have given you an average rating of 1.75!!
pah. damn drunken yank.
----------
blame bart. did you rate my shitty posts five times? man, I can still type.
but I'm in trouble with the wife tomorrow.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 06:00:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:52:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
Like everyone in here, i love being noticed (even though i'm one of those shy-types!)
And the difference between rorrim and messmind is significant , i noticed myself by now .
Rorrim is sober at work , while messmind try's to make even a bigger mess of his mind by addition of various chemicals and substances , while @ home..
Greetings Fishman , Uber wouldn't be the same without ya ! Tonight i'll have a beer , and salute you !
---------
messming/rorrim: I ain't leavin' for chrissake, i'm just drunk. But I can still type. Mozilla's great . Spellcheck and all
also, I love beano.
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:59:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AND I have given you an average rating of 1.75!!
pah. damn drunken yank.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:54:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Have another , just for great times !
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:53:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark... I got properly roasted for you birthday.
'nother list I didn't make.
Submitted by messmind (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:52:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Like everyone in here, i love being noticed (even though i'm one of those shy-types!)
And the difference between rorrim and messmind is significant , i noticed myself by now .
Rorrim is sober at work , while messmind try's to make even a bigger mess of his mind by addition of various chemicals and substances , while @ home..
Greetings Fishman , Uber wouldn't be the same without ya ! Tonight i'll have a beer , and salute you !
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:51:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:31:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
I can sell you n00ds of FG3209
------
erm...how much?
Don't tell FG I asked.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:43:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
NO
I need to go to be.d
Thanks for the happy b-day though.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:41:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Happy Birthday Snark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You wanna shitty job?
I got one for you.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:39:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously?
I was just about to quit drinking for hte night.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:31:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I quit drinking
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:31:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I can sell you n00ds of FG3209
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-10 05:27:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Snarky Snarkman drunken birthday auto +2.
I saw a bunch of names on this.
I better be in there somewhere or I'm going to totally forget this was even posted in the morning and not give a shit one way or the other.
(That's going to happen anyways)