I Pooped the Big One!!! (562 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: dam
Rating: 1.13 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Daniel Jaines (View user info) at 2007-02-12 13:48:29 EST
Yes that is the truth udder fiends I finally ministered the cortege to pop the question and ask my love Jaylena to marry me!!!
That is rite, old Daniel Jaines is getting bitched and I hope it lasts forever!
Now I was so nervous I was seeding ballots but I assed her and she said yes.
Now there are a few expectorated parables, the big one being that I want my friend Nobe to be my beast mane and Jaylena says no way because she still thinks Nobe is a racist since he is always talking about the Modern American Trickster which is our own Negro. Now Nobe is also the one who keeps saying that Jaylena is a Negro as well the most abjured thing I have ever heard.
Jaylena asked me to ask my daddy to come on over from Tennessee to be at the weeding and it turns out that he is in prison for burning a cross near a church and the dam cross fell over and set the hole dam church on fire (!!!!) and so daddy in is hate water.
(I always tell him you HAVE to start burning the crass at the top or it will fall over but he always stars the fire at the bottom)
I glide and told her that my dad was in the hospital.
Anyhow we will have a nice wedding and then a big deception at Jaylena's house with her mom and dad and brothers.
(I snaked a look at the food they were talking about for the conniption and it is the stuff Jaylena always makes for me no fairy fore runner shit just good old fascist AMERICAN food. Look at this>>>>
Southern Defiled Chicken
Freed Catfish Fillies
BBQ Snare ribs
Collared Greens
Dirty Rice (Jaylena always say "Want to get dirty"? when she makes this and it makes me incorrigibly corny)
Smothered Park Chaps
Black Eyed Peace
Screwed Oprah
Slap Yo Manhood Meatloaf (Some times Jaylena shakes her big round perfect butte in my face and looks over her shoulder and says 'Wanna slap yo mama?" She is a hilarity.)
Pulled Porn (one of my favorites)
Chattering
Peach Gobbler
Shoe Fly Pie
Peeking Pie
Street Pothole Pie )
My god dam just biting that list made my mouth wander.
Any how that is the latest up date under sight! I will try to let you know how things are preceding. Wish me lots of lick.
PS_= I Told Jaylena that I some times commend on rubber site and she looked at all of your frantic postings and said that she did not want me banging out with wired people and freaks (And yelled about Nobe again when Nobe came by to show us all his ass because he got the Stairs and Bears tattered on his hummock and he already had the rebel fag on his ass earlier .)
I asked Jaylena if I could post a picture of her because she is so lovely and hard stirring and she said "NO [enter very unladylike word here] WAY@@@]
So anyhow remember how I tolled you all that Jaylena looks like the address Vanessa Williams well here is a picture of that actress when she was young and this is what Jaylena looks like now only her faith is thinner but as you can clearly see Nobe is denuded because just like Vanessa Williams my Jaylena is odiously no black African American Negro woman!
User Reviews
Submitted by Falafel (user info) at 2007-02-13 00:18:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So.. many... intentional malapropisms. Well done.
Submitted by marginwalker (user info) at 2007-02-12 16:27:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
!
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-02-12 16:17:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:52:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
LOOPS! I WERE SO DISCOMBOBULATED WITH MANACLE RAFTER I MAST HAVE HAT THE RUNG BATON!
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:36:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck, I'm still giggling.
I stopped for a second then hit the back button, saw the title and cracked up again.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:35:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ahahahaha! Classic Jaines!
Congrats on getting bitched my friend!
Submitted by orph (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:17:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice work - congrats
Submitted by DanJaines (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ichthyoids is a idot.
Submitted by Luther (user info) at 2007-02-12 15:01:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
hah. "a lickable clink."
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:59:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
AMAZINGLY WITTY! BETTER THAN CATS!
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:18:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now I'm hungry for some Southern Defiled Chicken
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:02:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2007-02-12 14:01:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DanJaines (user info) at 2007-02-12 13:58:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Her is some past history wear I talked about Nobe being a jerk about Jaylena
http://www.ubersite.com/m/43780 I think I pasted that right so it will be a lickable clink.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-12 13:52:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by DanJaines (user info) at 2007-02-12 13:50:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
dam I shoed have changed the name of that picture if Jaylena seize it she will start looking for my picture stash.