Caul, calm down. It's just the intarwebs. (799 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.17 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Manitou (View user info) at 2007-02-14 19:16:44 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/93362
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-14 18:08:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
you idiot - OATHMEAL sent this - I know this for a fact.
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I know I'll get -2 flamed for even posting this but you all know what they say about the truth and setting one free and all that shnizzle.
Jonny, I have got to let the cat out of the bag about this one. Like a hard cock being stuffed into the mouth of an unwilling recipient, it's just too hard to keep inside.
Folks, JonnyX and I are friends in real life.
It's true.
We met eachother at a Stop the Violence rally in DC back in 2000. His fervent, limitless, homoerotic rage coupled with his passion for peace brought us together like two magnets. He admired my flowing red locks and I couldn't keep my eyes off the back of his skirt.
*sigh*
Memories.
So, truth be told - Caulaincourt, I'm guilty as charged. Unfortunately, Jonny and I are an inseparable, formidable force bent on destroying you.
... and as far as information that can be found on the internet - well.
Jonny DID invent the stalk-o-matic. I'm not privvy to the nuts and bolts of it.
I'm just in it for the sex.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-20 20:13:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
dang, i AM pretty hot
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-16 13:10:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 19:59:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
no, not just with me.
you being unamusing is pretty much the general concensus.
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Is that the best you can do?
Wow, how pathetique - if you're not even going to try, don't bother.
You need to stop eating the McDonalds - it's making you fat, lazy, and stupid.
Submitted by BubbaEarl (user info) at 2007-02-16 08:24:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
twat
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-02-16 07:51:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You pathetic little man.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-02-15 20:45:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
erm... bret? jonny is a girl you moron.
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2007-02-15 20:40:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-15 10:43:25 (#)
Ranking: -1
you've done better work than this, bret.
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When??
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-02-15 20:21:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:54:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
...As for the email I sent you, I honestly believed it was a fake email address, so I didn't expect a reply. I talk with plenty of other people around here, I don't need to talk to you.
Why would you send an e-mail to what you thought was a fake address?
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2007-02-15 20:20:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Good old JonnyX. Still the biggest loser on the entire world wide web.
Good luck with that, champ.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 19:59:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
no, not just with me.
you being unamusing is pretty much the general concensus.
just thought you'd like to know.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:54:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:31:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
good job on leaving out ¾ of my reply.
ok JonnyX...i'm gonna satisfy you. your jokes and shenanigans really affect me. just like when jaypeg would call me a fag. oh man, did that jeopardize my entire emotional integrity. it's true! and whenever i get an email from an aging loser who thrives for attention, i have to admit, i get all nervous and call my girlfriend about it and tell her to lock all the doors and hide in the closet.
i assure you, you are extremely funny and your silly antics have leverage on strangers on the internet.
keep up the good work, my digital warrior!
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sorry, I didnt mean to offend you, I just cut 'n' pasted the relevant parts.
I don't do any jokes or shenanigans any more with you, because you dont like it when I do.
As for the email I sent you, I honestly believed it was a fake email address, so I didn't expect a reply. I talk with plenty of other people around here, I don't need to talk to you.
Mon vieux, I suspect we are both getting bored with this - it really doesn't matter anyways. If I am unamusing to you, I guess that is the cross I shall have to bear...TABARNAK!!!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:36:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
But you also totally FREAK out when anyone makes jokes about 'stalking' you."""
yes, FREAKED OUT, Jonnyx!
are you saying that you have some kind of cyber-superpowers that allow you to make people freak out on the side of the planet? wow!
go outside, get laid, get a life...you need it.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:31:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
good job on leaving out ¾ of my reply.
ok JonnyX...i'm gonna satisfy you. your jokes and shenanigans really affect me. just like when jaypeg would call me a fag. oh man, did that jeopardize my entire emotional integrity. it's true! and whenever i get an email from an aging loser who thrives for attention, i have to admit, i get all nervous and call my girlfriend about it and tell her to lock all the doors and hide in the closet.
i assure you, you are extremely funny and your silly antics have leverage on strangers on the internet.
keep up the good work, my digital warrior!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 18:09:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 16:35:34 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 12:33:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bret, Caul takes these kind of shenanigans VERY personally. He's a pretty good guy most of the time, but this sort of thing makes him come completely unglued, and he is more than capable of pulling some jgreening-style pranks. So my advice to you would be not to go there with him on this.
The last person that did that was Emily, and that turned out to be kinda ugly.
===
i love it when people like you describe others at the third person instead of addressing the person directly in order to get approval and to make it sound more 'factual' than empty accusations.
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What are you babbling about?
Seriously, I don't think that translated into English properly from what you meant to say.
You DO take it personally, and I know this because you already once threatened me personally.
I can only take you at your words Alain - I do know that you joke around and do things to get people's attention, and that you cultivate your 'cult of personality'. I am aware of this.
But you also totally FREAK out when anyone makes jokes about 'stalking' you. I am trying to point this out to others, I would think you would at least appreciate that.
Or don't appreciate it, I don't care, Caulaincourt is just a bunch of pixels on a screen anyways...just like JonnyX.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 16:43:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this post is funny because i'm the one who told jonnyx to calm down, that trapping jack into his internet little games wasn't worth celebrating.
then he told me he was just joking so i pointed him toward that post http://www.ubersite.com/m/93362 to prove that he's a little over the top and his reaction was ...OMG CAUL! YOU FELL INTO MY TRAP TOO! DON'T WORRY MAN! CALM DOWN!
I don't get it.
I suppose you need to be an old reject who lives through a website to understand.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-15 16:35:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 12:33:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
Bret, Caul takes these kind of shenanigans VERY personally. He's a pretty good guy most of the time, but this sort of thing makes him come completely unglued, and he is more than capable of pulling some jgreening-style pranks. So my advice to you would be not to go there with him on this.
The last person that did that was Emily, and that turned out to be kinda ugly.
===
i love it when people like you describe others at the third person instead of addressing the person directly in order to get approval and to make it sound more 'factual' than empty accusations. it's the epitome of faggotry in communication.
but back to the 'issue' at hand. you don't seem to get it. i don't take this personally. if anything, your email made me laugh my ass off so i thought i'd share it with ubersite, not because i was offended or something.
you think people are offended when they really just wanna make you realize what a net-addicted loser you are.
you probably won't get it again because a loser usually lacks the perspective others have of him.
you kinda remind me of jaypig. he thought his jokes bothered me when in fact, the only irritant was that he thought he was witty even though he's the unfunniest man alive. i was just trying to help him realize that.
i'm altruist like that.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-02-15 15:53:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Jesus, you're a loser. Why don't you just fuck off already.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-02-15 13:33:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
There needs to be a button under "Don't bother(-2)" that just plays the sound effect from the super mario when you die.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-15 12:33:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Manitou (user info) at 2007-02-15 08:53:26 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-14 23:46:04 (#)
Ranking: -2
calm down?
i'm aware it's just the intraweb. it's precisely for that reason that i do not understand why clowns like jonnyx salivate at the thought of getting close to strangers or trapping them into stupid shenaningans.
"OMG! I'M SO COOL! I'M STALKING PEOPLE IN HOPE TO UNSETTLE THEM AND GET THEIR ATTENTION!
so yeah, i'm totally calm. do you really think that your emails are scary?
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Caul, I barely know you. In fact, I don't know you at all come to think about it.
Not only are you completely unknown to me but I have no problem with you at all. You seem ok by me as a matter of fact.
I didn't send anyone any e-mails you doof. This post is a parody and I'm sure you're smart enough to see that if you really focus.
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Bret, Caul takes these kind of shenanigans VERY personally. He's a pretty good guy most of the time, but this sort of thing makes him come completely unglued, and he is more than capable of pulling some jgreening-style pranks. So my advice to you would be not to go there with him on this.
The last person that did that was Emily, and that turned out to be kinda ugly.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-15 10:43:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
you've done better work than this, bret.
Submitted by Manitou (user info) at 2007-02-15 08:53:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-14 23:46:04 (#)
Ranking: -2
calm down?
i'm aware it's just the intraweb. it's precisely for that reason that i do not understand why clowns like jonnyx salivate at the thought of getting close to strangers or trapping them into stupid shenaningans.
"OMG! I'M SO COOL! I'M STALKING PEOPLE IN HOPE TO UNSETTLE THEM AND GET THEIR ATTENTION!
so yeah, i'm totally calm. do you really think that your emails are scary?
---------------
Caul, I barely know you. In fact, I don't know you at all come to think about it.
Not only are you completely unknown to me but I have no problem with you at all. You seem ok by me as a matter of fact.
I didn't send anyone any e-mails you doof. This post is a parody and I'm sure you're smart enough to see that if you really focus.
Now come on. Smoke a bowl, cheer up and work on enunciating 'brutal'.
Submitted by scum101 (user info) at 2007-02-15 04:39:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
makes sense that a pair of pathetic faggots like jx n oat would know each other.
Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle (user info) at 2007-02-15 01:49:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
but its not just the interweb. its a series of tubes which perverts can reach through and fondle you, which isn't all that bad really.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-02-14 23:46:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
calm down?
i'm aware it's just the intraweb. it's precisely for that reason that i do not understand why clowns like jonnyx salivate at the thought of getting close to strangers or trapping them into stupid shenaningans.
"OMG! I'M SO COOL! I'M STALKING PEOPLE IN HOPE TO UNSETTLE THEM AND GET THEIR ATTENTION!
so yeah, i'm totally calm. do you really think that your emails are scary?
what i'm doing is merely pointing out how pathetic that is.
once you get a life, you will understand that simple perspective and tell yourself "wow, i was a complete loser" like an adult reminding himself of his Dungeon&Dragons days.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-14 22:22:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-02-14 21:56:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by mrnoisy (user info) at 2007-02-14 21:25:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
lol
Submitted by jet_stream_nz (user info) at 2007-02-14 21:12:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oathmeal = auto -2
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-14 20:02:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-14 19:44:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Although I will say - you don't want to mess with Caulaincourt, Bret - he's even more thin-skinned than you.
(and I am not kidding)
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-14 19:28:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
goddamn it Bret I told you not to post my real picture you asshole