The Inheritance Of Will Hunter (320 hits)
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Submitted by Transmogrifier (View user info) at 2007-02-15 22:48:38 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/98323
With the teary-eyed blur that usually accompanies a night such as Will Hunter had helped himself to, he stumbled into the kitchen.
There was nothing in the fridge but two pickled eggs in a jar that could have, at one point, held twenty, and a box of baking soda. His stomach all too eagerly reminded him of this fact in the way that stomachs do, and he politely told it to fuck itself. Six unopened beers tried their best to seduce Will, though he knew better. He would have to go down to the Golden Dollar.
Sooner than most inhabitants of the building could have managed in their age, Will was on floor one. He exited via the main doors and limped a morning limp towards the budget heaven of the Golden Dollar.
The morning mists to the east and west were forming as the sickly pastures exhaled all they had breathed in the night. The sun had not yet risen in the sky, and the world was all blue and grey for Will Hunter.
The occasional rolling crunch of the tires of flatbed trucks was the only sound but for his breathing and the humming of the streetlights. The trucks were carrying the lumber of the land into the heart of the city, and no other sight was to be seen that early in the morning.
Will rested his hand on the frigid handle to the door of the Golden Dollar. As he pulled it open, a bell happily chimed above his head.
The fluorescent tubes on the ceiling were like interrogation lights. Will stood on the threshold, rubbing his eyes and squinting.
A heavy Pakistani man stood behind the chipped and scored glass counter to the right. His belly strained against his button-up shirt and through the damp patch on his chest, Will could see a forest of hair.
"Good day."
Will just stared.
The man extended a poorly performed grin. The dry corners of his mouth curled back across his face, stretching his lips in what could not be described as a smile, rather a display of his discoloured teeth clambering over one another as people do in a riot.
"Hey." A single word summed up the distance Will wished be kept between them.
He walked down the isle furthest from the cash. His eyes drifted lazily past various issues of Juggz, Garden and Home, cans of Raid, Mountain Fresh Deodorizer spray, and old loaves of bread. Will pulled a loaf of four dollar Wonderbread from amid its brothers and friends. A bottle of water and a jar of peanut flavoured spread joined the bread and no sooner had he given exact change for the items had he eagerly stepped out into the unwelcoming infant Winter air.
Will took the side entrance of Tariq's Rock and passed through the lobby. On the couch were his two favourite women: the Hags, as he affectionately called them in the privacy of his imagination.
The dominant of the two always spoke first and for longer,
"I see you've got yourself some groceries there, William! It's always good to see a boy your age looking after himself."
Will was and had been twenty three for seven months. A boy indeed to these two.
"One always needs to eat, indeed." The smaller one offered.
"Yes, well, I awoke with a spot of hunger in my belly and I thought I would gather some supplies for the week."
Will took a squeaky rubber step on the marbled floor towards the elevator.
"Now..."
Will froze reluctantly.
"If you ever want for some good, old fashioned... home cooking, feel free to ask me. I haven't been a mother about the kitchen for some time and I would enjoy having you for dinner some time."
She looked exactly as though that was what she would do. Will's intelligence thanked her for the offer and his heart cursed the idea silently as his wet footsteps made their way towards the elevator bank.
He unlocked, opened the door and set about making some of his own good old fashioned home cooking. The peanut spread jar was dropped next to a slice of bread and his knife had no sooner pricked the smooth and oily surface than the small chirping of some hidden pocket watch tickled his ear.
William dropped his knife.
Tick tock tick tock tick
He stepped slowly into the living room. There was nothing there but a sweater crumpled into a ball on the floor and the thermostat hidden behind a small metallic plate on the wall. Will walked over to the interface and opened the plate. He flicked the on/off switch a couple times back and forth, listening for the heater to power down each time, and waiting for the sound to stop. It did not.
Will entered Lilly's room, though he saw nothing more than what he expected. Her bed was sitting in the middle of the room, and the misty blue morning left condensation on the windows. A forest of stitched vines and leaves covered the bed and everything seemed to have some sort of tassel, fringe, or lace. Looking to his left, he could see the closet door was ajar, and he knew damn well he hadn't left it that way. The closet door folded open and the howl of the hinges compared to the sanctity of the rest of the suite paid tribute to the almost inaudible minuteness of the ticking.
Will quickly spun on his heels and slid back into the living room. Not a soul was there, just as before, though Will wasn't sure why the presence of another was even in question.
Neither sound nor device to produce any sound at all resided in the study. On the north wall there was a door, framed in light as the room was dark. The bathroom.
The walls were paneled with glossy pink tiles. Each was home to a small animal, such as a mole, a fox, or a duck. There was a plain white bathtub, molded in fiberglass and painted white, which came up out of the floor. Above it was suspended on a track a blue shower curtain with various flowers and petals geometrically populating its surface.
On the right there was a clover-shaped sink sunken into the false-ivory countertop. A small mirror was hanging just above the sink.
Between these, there was a toilet.
William dropped his knife. The clang of the metal against the tiled floor drowned for a moment, in ecstasy, the sound of the thing which, having no form, took the most hideous shapes in William's nerves.
With a softly shaking hand, William laid to rest the lights in the room and retreated to the kitchen. In a fury reserved for psychopaths and professional boxers, he slapped together three peanut-spread sandwiches and devoured them. Medicine to a sick man is what it was. The hangover must have been distorting his world.
Soon, with his nerves calmed by the feast, he lay on Lilly's bed. Well fed, he was able to think rationally. A fool's morning madness was what he was just engaged in. He wouldn't tell his friend about this.
He closed his eyes and imagined he was driving along a dark country road in an unknown wilderness far north of here. The headlights illuminate the road ahead, though to his right stretches a dark and empty plain. To his left stands a thick and howling forest climbing a hill. Both are barely visible only by the light of the moon over a distant mountain.
And this was how he lay; wrapped all up in dreaming. Perfectly still was the room as the sun crossed the horizon of smog that grew from the citytops. Peacefully, Will fell asleep. Mercifully, the Mickey Mouse clock hushed its voice for him that needed rest.
The morning was filled with business. Will picked up the yellowed plastic telephone that hung in a bracket on the wall.
"Yes, is this the Princips?"
"Well, hello! Sorry to call so early in the morning - oh excellent - I'm simply calling to confirm the plans for purchase?"
"Oh excellent. You will not be disappointed, I promise."
"Um, yes, two bedrooms, one bathroom. The kitchen is rather large. You can come over any time Friday - that is to say two days. I've removed most of the appliances and furniture, though I have some photographs of the place as it was before, so you can get a sense... oh yes. Alright.. So you can get a sense of how it could look if decorated properly."
"Oh don't worry! Bring the kids if you'd like. I don't suspect you should need to see it too long - oh unless of course you want to, yes..."
"Well Friday it is then, mister Princip. I'll let you up if you call extension 1045. Okay, goodbye and gooday."
Will smiled to himself. It would be a good night.
PS- Disregard this (http://www.ubersite.com/m/98804) post, it sucks cocks
User Reviews
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2007-02-16 03:59:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Needs more triceratops
Submitted by Snare (user info) at 2007-02-15 23:28:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
When you offer a critique that's more than WOW LIEK WOT A SHITE TITLE then we can talk.
Until then, smegma breath, keep your puiresence to yourself.
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2007-02-15 23:02:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You need to rewrite most of this. Most of your sentences are very awkward.