cops are assholes (part i) (563 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 0.27 on 35 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by thecrystalship (View user info) at 2007-02-19 12:52:14 EST
I was being lightly patted down as I looked around at the white concrete walls, florescent lights, and metal doors.
"Do you have any weapons or drugs on you?"
"Yeah, I have a weapon of mass destruction in my pants."
"Alright asshole, follow me."
Through heavy metal doors, into an elevator, and down to the booking station. My escort walked over to another guard and began looking at a chart on the wall.
"This is Anthony..." (long pause)
"or is this Adam?"
"Is this Anthony?"
I turned around.
"Yeah, I'm Tony."
He looked like he wanted to twist my head off.
"What's the matter? Can't you hear?"
What a dumbfuck, of course I could hear. I thought he was talking to the other guard who knew my name and was standing right next to him looking at the same chart. We walked over to a desk where he asked me his questions, then he gave me itchy sheets and orange clothes, and escorted me to my cell.
"Want to play some cards?"
"Sure, what do you wanna play?"
I lost about 4/5 times in everything we played. I quit and went back to my cell to get my towel and stroke my cock up to what I deemed to be a reasonable size for the black boys that were on my block, then I stripped and sauntered over to the showers strutting with the confidence of a man and a big penis.
"Wanna play some more cards?"
The food is bad, it is served cold. Besides this, the water tastes like it was pumped in from a dirty puddle. The favored meal items are the juice or the milk being that these items are not susceptible to the fuck-ups that seem to be so constant.
"Alright, you want to put some wagers down on the next few games?"
"Whatcha got?"
"I have some gum, I can bet that and my juice against your juice."
My losing streak came to an abrupt end. I ended the day with about a weeks worth of juice IOUs, and I was content in knowing that I wouldn't have to drink the smelly water any time soon.
I walked to my cell and laid down on the mat looking up at the dim florescent light. Wet pages, now dry, were stuck to it in an attempt to block it out. It always stays on, even when you sleep, I hate it. I pulled my blindfold out of my sock, tied it around my eyes, and crawled under a sheet.
There isn't much to do in jail: watch TV, play cards, sleep. When you get bored with one activity you choose your next from the very limited selection and this becomes a repeated cycle. Soon the entire cycle becomes boring and you feel like crashing your head into the white concrete walls just to do something different.
"Griebtroff."
A voice over an intercom called my name and I was brought out into the hallway.
"How are you?"
"I'm fine."
"Your name is I'm Fine?"
"Err, no, I thought you said how are you. Tony."
"Well, don't you have a last name?"
"Yeah, Griebtroff."
He talked very aggressively, snotty really, and it pissed me off, but I calmed myself down. I was getting out soon, I wasn't going to ruin a good mood over an asshole. He put me in another hallway and then told me and another inmate to wait. 15 minutes later he reappeared.
"Griebtroff, right?"
"Yeah, don't you remember?"
"How am I supposed to remember? Do I know you? Do we hang out together?"
I was a bit surprised, he was angry and on the verge of yelling.
"Tell me something, are you always an asshole or just when you put that uniform on in the morning?"
"Oh, so you're going to cop an attitude with me, huh?"
"When in Rome..."
He pretended to write something down on a piece of paper and then he left. I looked over and smiled at the kid next to me, but instead of seeing the mirrored smile which I expected to see, I saw a look of worry. "He's a cocksucker," I said. It didn't appear to comfort him. 40 minutes later the guard came back and brought us to the booking office to be processed. When he saw to it that we made it to the desk he turned around and started on his way out.
"You can keep Griebtroff!"
A guard behind the desk asked him what he said, but he gave no response as he stormed out through the door.
"Wow, he isn't in a good mood today."
I looked up at her as I was signing my name and smiled.
"I'm sorry, that may be my fault."
She laughed.
"That's fine for you, but we have to work with him for the next 8 hours."
I went through a maze of halls and then I got onto an elevator and waited to be sent down. I heard someone yell something indiscernible behind the half-mirrored glass across the hall so I stepped out of the elevator.
"What did you say?"
"GET BACK ON THE ELEVATOR!"
I quickly got back on the elevator.
"I thought you said something to me."
"You know we talk to each other back here."
She said it in a really snobby manner much like the other guard. Another miserable fuck I thought. Still, the way she said it, and I couldn't think of anything to yell back, it just about killed me. The elevator doors closed.
Just think, I almost apologized to the cunt. I would have never forgiven myself. That reminds me of another time when I was a bit younger and got into some trouble. This cop on a bicycle decided to give me a chase. I gave him a good run but eventually my lungs just couldn't take it anymore. Later I went down to the copshop and apologized to the prick. You know what he said?
"I don't care if you apologize to me, I'm not showing you any leniency."
I couldn't believe it, I didn't ask for leniency. There I was giving him a sincere apology and he had to go and ruin it by saying something like that. He wheeled his chair out from behind the desk and showed me his left knee.
"Do you see that? Right there. Do you see that? Look. That is from when I tried to tackle you."
I looked at his knee, he had a quarter-sized scab, but you would have thought I broke his leg the way he moaned about it. I apologized to him again and then he had nerve enough to tell me that I ought to be sorry. Jesus Christ, that really got me, why the fuck did he think I was there? I've always regretted apologizing to him that second time; I should have just walked out after he started crying about his knee; it wasn't my fault he tried to tackle me and missed.
Yeah, I've realized that cops are assholes, the majority of them anyway. When I was a kid I always looked up to cops. I might have seen a cop sitting in a restaurant with his gun at his side and his badge gleaming in the sunlight and just admired the hell out of him for being so damn honorable. That was before I knew any of the pricks; protect and serve my ass. It's their attitudes mostly; they demand an undeserved respect and when they don't think they are getting it then they unnecessarily challenge you. I try...
The elevator doors opened and the sun from the lobby washed over my face.
It feels good to be out.
User Reviews
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-20 07:37:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
this ones on me
Im pretty sure Im a sociopath
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 21:05:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How much do you charge per session Dr. Rad?
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 21:02:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-19 19:30:25 (#)
Ranking: 0
Im just going to make the observation that you come off as an immature asshole with entitlement issues and poor impulse control. Regardless of how you percieve others treating you, you probably should control what you say and do to people. Furthermore, it is doubtful that all of these people were mean to you without cause. You probably come off as a snide punkass who is begging for a beat down.
jus sayin
:)
--------------------------
Maybe it was because I was abandoned as a child...boohoohoo. Immature, no. Asshole, maybe. Guess how much I care either way? Lol. Do I deserve the attitudes I receive from these pricks? Sure, sometimes; there are times when people escalate each others attitudes. I don't like to submit to authority, I realize that is one of my problems. It's nothing more than stubborn pride. In this story; however, I was not the instigator. Well, aside from my WMD joke, which was a joke. I can't help the fact that most police officers are either sociopaths or have inferiority complexes.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-19 19:30:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Im just going to make the observation that you come off as an immature asshole with entitlement issues and poor impulse control. Regardless of how you percieve others treating you, you probably should control what you say and do to people. Furthermore, it is doubtful that all of these people were mean to you without cause. You probably come off as a snide punkass who is begging for a beat down.
jus sayin
:)
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-02-19 19:20:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-02-19 19:02:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Not fictional? Oh well still a good read.
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 18:19:28 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and I did call them guards until I made an observation in general of assholes in badges towards the end.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-19 18:42:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://shop.bellacor.com/detail-12/132439/38.htm
?
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 18:26:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
...and suck my dick bitches, this is Rusty Silver!
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 18:19:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, and I did call them guards until I made an observation in general of assholes in badges towards the end.
Submitted by TheCrystalShip (user info) at 2007-02-19 18:18:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
2nd offense OWI, all true except for the chronological order.
Submitted by DesolateMisanthrope (user info) at 2007-02-19 17:57:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
"Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job."
___________________
It is not hard to make the assumption that you are fucking clueless. Pigs have the following characteristics;
- White
- above average height
- buzz cut
- generally chunky
- they feel the need to speak condescendingly, make snide remarks.
- they like to abuse their authority to compensate for their insecurities (the hassles of a low paying job, painstaking divorce)
- during the course of an arrest they will outnumber the suspect 10:1 (the last two acting as though they are making a vital contribution and pretending to be out of breath)the suspect kissing the ground no less) and then proceed to rough him up before finally clamping the handcuffs all too tight and tossing him in the squad car in a very cramped/uncomfortable position.
- Of course the pigmentation of your skin colour plays a role in their decision making process, although at times they are liberal to their liking. Almost instantly you can decipher as to whether the cop in question will take up a stand somewhere in the middle before contemplating the situation and making a decision, or act the role of a pathosis.
- Usually, you can make a choice to infuriate them (ask for their badge number, name and info of their superior, upon which they will ask for your ID and reciprocate), try to work around them, or a combination of both.
- There is of course an exception to everything and you will seldom run across a candid, straightforward officer who in a state of naivety, feels like he can genuinely make a difference.
- Overall, cops are very irritating, causitc pricks, who insist upon imposing on you with their abundance of squalor.
____________________
If you had truly spent time in the general population sector of the local jail you would be the bitch on the block and soon found dead with a pint of semen in your stomach.
Submitted by homer42 (user info) at 2007-02-19 17:57:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's clearly a fictional story you fucking jerkoffs and it's not a bad one.
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2007-02-19 16:51:58 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job.
Submitted by MichelleNJ (user info) at 2007-02-19 16:51:58 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job.
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2007-02-19 16:45:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Generally prison guards work in jails, not cops.
Submitted by DanJaines (user info) at 2007-02-19 15:54:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
chunk bellow
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-19 15:30:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job.
======
what this guy said.
:)
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2007-02-19 15:25:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Er...acquire... funny to actually read my own posts because I notice the spelling mistake in one second. I know how to spell the word, but I am on a funky keyboard that sometimes misses.... not proof-reading one's post will doom you.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-02-19 15:12:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
to be honest, i skimmed through most of this, but from what i did see, it was alright.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2007-02-19 15:08:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The police are a gang.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:31:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
i've arrested better
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:24:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Now, go aquire a handgun and find that guy and put a well-placed shot right between his eyes.
If you are a tough guy, you'll go out and get yourself some bad ass body armor and an assault weapon. Then, go to some outdoor police function and open fire from a distance. Handguns, which they will have, will be worthless. Spray the crowd down, shoot officers, etc. Do what you gotta do.
Oh you'll die in the end. If you kill enough cops, you'll make the national news!
Good luck, man.
Cops suck. Dead cops rule.
Submitted by Luther (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:13:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
actually, this about sums it up:
"Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:29:26 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-19 12:57:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
What happened to parts A-H? "
Submitted by Luther (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:09:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This could have been WAY better. And more interesting. How's about you tell us about the guys who raped you while you were in?
Oh, and 2 sentances don't count for a paragraph.
Try harder next time.
Submitted by Pervy (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:05:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Automatic +2 because I pulled 3 years for drugs and I hope all cops die slow, agonizing deaths.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:00:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:20:51 (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm sure I've been to jail more times than most of the people here, but arguing with them is fucking stupid and proves nothing
=================
Exactly.
They're assholes, copping an attitude with them might make you look like hot shit to some of the other locked up people you'll never see again, but it really only gives them a reason.
Then again, I'm the same person who ran from a cop, then stopped to mock him when he gave up chasing me and was doubled over out of breath. Of course when he caught up with me again he remembered and while he was "detaining" me and I was cuffed behing my back, I "accidentally" fell face first into a gravel driveway.
Submitted by Zackstersmackster (user info) at 2007-02-19 14:00:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job. "
True that. Corrections Officers are NOT cops. They WISH they could have been cops, but they were mostly too fat or otherwise unable to hack it at the police academy, so they're stuck working in the jail. C.O.'s get their attitude though, in all fairness, from being locked inside a building that smells like feet and ass (on a good day when it doesn't smell like shit and piss) and having to be ever-ready for some shitbum inmate who will hurl fecal matter or blood at them. That is enough to make anyone have an attitude.
The way to avoid them is not to get arrested.
Submitted by moneyshotforyou (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:45:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Correctional officers are not cops. Correctional officers tend to be assholes whereas most cops I have dealt with were just normal people doing their job.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:29:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-19 12:57:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
What happened to parts A-H?
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:20:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm sure I've been to jail more times than most of the people here, but arguing with them is fucking stupid and proves nothing.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:15:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this was good.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:07:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
this was a waste of my fucking time
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:07:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm assuming this is fiction.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2007-02-19 13:05:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2007-02-19 12:59:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
So you act like a douchebag and don't understand why they are assholes to you....
that's about it, right?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2007-02-19 12:57:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What happened to parts A-H?