Happy St. Patty's Day (warning: pointless) (1429 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.4 on 77 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by coley (View user info) at 2007-03-18 00:00:00 EDT
I've hardly got any Irish in me, but that didn't stop me from loading up on my leprechaun hat, "kiss me I'm irish" sash, and green beads last night.
I'm drinking the Guinness some random guys handed me as I walked to my car in the grocery store parking lot this afternoon, and then I'm going to sleep.
I probably should have waited til TONIGHT to celebrate.....
I'm getting too old for this.
User Reviews
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2007-04-08 16:43:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I still cant believe you called me a MO FO!
Was going to say I hope your easter eggs melt but thats just mean!! heh
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-27 00:13:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, here I thought you were talking about my goatee.
Rest assured, I'm well versed in hair removal, and yes nads is edible (and sugaring is quite tasty)
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-03-26 23:24:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you should try nair....or waxing. I hear the Brazilian is quite popular.
And nads is edible...oh god did I just say that?
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-03-26 15:19:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Of course you're +2 worthy.
You're my baby mama's clone afterall. How can THAT be a bad thing?
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2007-03-20 15:43:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 23:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Me dressing in this silliness and drinking on Friday had very little to do with pretending to be, wanting to be, or actually being Irish. Here's the deal with me:
I pretty much like any excuse to dress in costume, weird or silly, have fun, make people laugh, and have a few drinks.
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this is why anyone who doesn't like st. patricks day is an ass.
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-03-19 20:50:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
p.s.- loving the bangs
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-19 19:42:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
JonnyX: HOW DID YOU KNOW?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2007-03-19 18:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Chris is part Irish, and we spent the evening drinking guiness and, of course, looking for a fight. Ah tradition.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2007-03-19 16:26:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm guessing you swallowed a lot of green semen this weekend
Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-03-19 15:41:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-03-19 14:16:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Needs more nipple.
Submitted by St_Jimmy (user info) at 2007-03-19 13:23:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMG U R so HaWT!!1!
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-03-19 04:57:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 23:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Me dressing in this silliness and drinking on Friday had very little to do with pretending to be, wanting to be, or actually being Irish. Here's the deal with me:
I pretty much like any excuse to dress in costume, weird or silly, have fun, make people laugh, and have a few drinks.
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Now I'm really fucking confused.
Paddy's day was Saturday.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 23:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Me dressing in this silliness and drinking on Friday had very little to do with pretending to be, wanting to be, or actually being Irish. Here's the deal with me:
I pretty much like any excuse to dress in costume, weird or silly, have fun, make people laugh, and have a few drinks.
There just happen to be holidays that are sufficient reason for such things.
Someday I'll make a post about my closet and you'll all see what I'm talking about.
Scourge: you're losing your edge, man! -2 this pointless shit, and TAKE BACK UBER!
PS I stick up picure bandwagon posts because I'm a bored, shitty writer attention whore, not because I think they're good.
Submitted by The_Drake (user info) at 2007-03-18 22:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck you, I had to work behind the bar and didn't get to get(very) drunk.
Id DID, however, make 250 bucks in 6 hours....so that's like...100 dollars an hour.
GO me. But fuck you. (not butt fuck....just fuck) Jealousy -2
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2007-03-18 19:25:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Erin Go Braless
Submitted by Zebra (user info) at 2007-03-18 18:34:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:45:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm a fucking weakling
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
also, it says 'pointless' right in the title, so its my own fault for clicking on the damn thing in the first place
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
god damn it
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:43:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice fucking hat
Submitted by FlakMonkey (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'd like to give this a -1 but am scared of the potential repercussions. the snubbings, the veiled comments from other users, the direct reprimands from other users. just too dangerous.
also, i figured i've unintentionally been insulting or offensive to you enough times that i owe you a few freebies.
also also, i've posted enough shit to fill a few septic tanks.
also also also, it's just an internet rating.
Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2007-03-18 17:24:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
does every post of yours have to have your photo plastered all over it?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 16:24:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As Melanie said in Gone With the Wind, "The best
days are the days when babies come."
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Somebody just emailed me that. Thought I'd share.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 16:22:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Saint Andrew is the Patron Saint of Scotland, and St. Andrew's Day is celebrated by Scots around the world on the 30th November. He is thought to have been the younger brother of Simon Peter i.e. Saint Peter and both men became apostles of Jesus Christ.
Although not much more is known about him, it is thought that he was crucified by the Romans, the diagonal shape of this cross being the basis for the Cross of St. Andrew which appears on the Scottish Flag.
As legend would have it, a Greek Monk called St. Rule had a dream telling of the removal of St. Andrew's remains to Constantinople by Constantine The Great, and was instructed by an angel to find them and take as much of them as he could to the "ends of the earth" for safe-keeping.
St. Rule took various body parts from St. Andrew's tomb and followed the instructions he had been given in his dream. However, on his journey he was shipwrecked off the east coast of Scotland. The relics were housed for a while in the Cathedral of St. Andrews in 1160, however they are now lost, probably destroyed during the Scottish Reformation.
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Something to look forward to. I'll probably get drunk.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 16:20:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-03-18 10:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See, this is why Im glad no one celebrates St Andrews day. Imagine all the Americans running around in ginger wigs and tartan claiming to be Scottish...
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I don't need a holiday for this.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2007-03-18 15:12:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
want a bit of Irish in you?
Submitted by Beano312003 (user info) at 2007-03-18 14:22:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Why does everyone want to be Irish on St. Patricks day?
Submitted by GnarlsBarkley (user info) at 2007-03-18 13:53:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
cause you're coley, and I celebrated st-pattys HARDCORE.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-03-18 13:06:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't drink at all last night.
Although I had a few late ones Friday night/Saturday morning.
I'm no fun anymore.
Submitted by Dolson (user info) at 2007-03-18 12:50:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-03-18 10:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See, this is why Im glad no one celebrates St Andrews day. Imagine all the Americans running around in ginger wigs and tartan claiming to be Scottish even though their last name is "Wachowski"
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I'd be up for that, actually. Although it wouldn't be that poser, I'm a descendant of a lot of Leslie's (lowland clan...woo?).
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2007-03-18 10:56:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See, this is why Im glad no one celebrates St Andrews day. Imagine all the Americans running around in ginger wigs and tartan claiming to be Scottish even though their last name is "Wachowski"
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-03-18 09:17:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
if i was irish, i would laugh at the millions of people who pretend to be
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2007-03-18 09:15:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Yeah, I had 42 drinks yesterday, too.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2007-03-18 07:00:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Belated Happy day to you Co-Wife. I have the most astonishing hang over ever, and it has nothing to do with Paddys day.
I'm not Irish.........Not even a little bit. I'm very proud of this fact.
Submitted by Timmaaaaah (user info) at 2007-03-18 06:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Late Happy St Patricks to Coley from my 1/4 Irish self
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-03-18 04:12:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i was so drunk and preoccupied before that i didn't look at the photo
kiss me i'm irish plz
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2007-03-18 03:21:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
stop chewing your nails coleslore, you'll get worms and they'll fight with your crabs.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2007-03-18 03:12:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am descended from the ancient Irish king, Aedh Ua Dubhda.
I guess that's the answer to your question: Why is Lisa such a wise and sturdy ruler of men?
The More You Know
Submitted by Gunslinger (user info) at 2007-03-18 03:08:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hehe, you look like one of the girls I was dancing with tonite :D
Sober...:P
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-03-18 03:08:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
you don';t understand he's like 6'5 and so hottt i been working on this for months ok
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 03:05:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-03-18 02:50:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 me I kissed my friend's 21 year old HOT brother 5 times woo
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pfft! 21-year-olds. pfft!
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2007-03-18 02:50:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Auto +2 me I kissed my friend's 21 year old HOT brother 5 times woo
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 02:49:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/99816
"Your" picture isn't exactly the clearest I've seen.
Submitted by particle_man58 (user info) at 2007-03-18 02:25:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish I was drunk
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 02:16:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
1 post coming up
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:34:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:18:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've had sex to Marvin Gaye...on many...okay a few...occasions. Marvelous. Not the sex, per se, but the music. Yeah.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Marvin Gaye. Yes. Yes. I love Marvin Gaye.
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lungfish: Old man genius.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:31:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-03-18 14:51:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I figure out how to post pictures that are on my phone.
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Send them as a text to an email account, and download them from there.
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Axolotl: Boy Genius.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:18:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've had sex to Marvin Gaye...on many...okay a few...occasions. Marvelous. Not the sex, per se, but the music. Yeah.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 01:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Marvin Gaye. Yes. Yes. I love Marvin Gaye.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:59:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Welcome back to the proper camping post, LF!
Method: I love you.
thank you, thorpe for explaining that. I'll add the info to my long list of shit I'm gonna read someday.
Current mood: overtired and half-intoxicated
Currently listening to: Marvin Gaye "Sexual Healing"
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:57:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Pratchett is the author of the "Discworld" fantasy/comedy series, which a lot of people on Uber seem to read, and is bloody brilliant. If I was going to recommend a Discworld book to start on it would probably be Interesting Times, because that's the first I read, but really you can't go wrong with any of them, as it's not a very linear series. Maybe avoid the first three or four to start on, because the series got more grounded in reality, and better, as it went along. My favourite is Night Watch.
Bill Bryson writes non-fiction, mainly travel books. 'Notes from a Big Country' might be interesting for you to read as it's about his return to America (where he spent his childhood) after spending most of his adult life in Britain, and is in the form of lots of newspaper columns he wrote, and thus he avoids waffling as he is prone to do, but in a good way. My favourite is either 'Down Under', about his visit to Australia, or 'A Walk in the Woods', about him and an old druggie friend of his hiking some mountain trail in New England.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:52:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to fuck your down syndrome mouth
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:51:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I figure out how to post pictures that are on my phone.
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Send them as a text to an email account, and download them from there.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:48:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Where are all the drunk people at?
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I'm here. I was fucking around on Ax's post. And I had to pee.
Holy shit! Nat King Cole on the TV!
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
for shame, I didn't know who they were. I thought the names sounded familiar but didn't know. What did they write? (clearly I've never read them)....recommend something from each?
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My two favourite living authors respectively. And 3rd and 4th favourite authors overall. Respectively.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:39:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
by the way, who are terry pratchett and bill whatshisname?
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:39:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
a woman that looked "exactly like" me? WHOAH
that's weird.
I'm looking forward to this.
PS I hope she's not ugly. That would make me cry.
PSPS just kidding, tears are for pussies.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:37:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When I figure out how to post pictures that are on my phone.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:37:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Happy St. Patty's Day (warning: pointless) (1 hits)
Category: None
Rating: 1.83 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V) (Label this item)
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Submitted by coley (View user info) at 2007-03-18 14:00:00 EST
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If I had it set on Uber Time then it would be 00:00:00.
There was a waitress at a bowls club last night who looked exactly like you. I took a picture on my phone, which I'll post along with a picture of a woman who looked exactly like ghola that I saw at the Irish Club, and pictures of ME MEETING TERRY PRATCHETT AND BILL BRYSON WITHIN THE SAME WEEK.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Where are all the drunk people at?
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:35:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WOO FREE GUINNESS
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:21:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Usual Suspects is on. Goodbye.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:19:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, Haremn are good. Plus, I've been married 3 times. I got skillz, babe.
That reminds me of the old Sam Kinison line:
"guys eventually figure it, especially after they've been married a couple of time. I remember how it came to me. One day I was sitting around, after my second divorce, and it dawned on me that MAYBE IF I LEARNED HOW FUCK GOOD I WOULDN'T HAVE TO GIVE AWAY EVERYTHING I OWN EVERY FIVE FUCKING YEARS!!! OOOOH OOOOH OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!"
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:17:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ETS? where?
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:15:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ETS!
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:13:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not marrying anyone. I am, however, collecting applications for my harem.
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:09:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Goddamm I can type.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
dilate much?
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:06:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There are two nights out of the year that I, absolutely, will not got out. These are: Fucking New Years Eve and Saint Patrick Day. Amateur nights. I want to kick the shit out of college kids. And I will.
ps, I live near campus. Very near. I love college chicks. At least their looks. You youngins don't wear many clothes these days, do you? I'm okay with that.
I don't know. I've been drinking a bit.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
00:00:00 EDT
I was gonna -2 this out of spite because I have too much work to be doing anything tonight....but the 0s across the board stopped me.
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:04:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually both sides of my family came from Ireland so I guess my semen is 100% Irish.
I'll wager THAT just upped your consideration of my hand in wedlock, eh? EH?? EH????
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:03:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by coley (View user info) at 2007-03-18 00:00:00 EDT
00:00:00
omg
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:03:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A HUGE ANFRY JELOUS BICTH!!!
Submitted by Director (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:03:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That hat really brings out the green in yer eyes. I'd do ya, and inject my 50% pure Irish semen into ya.
Wouldn't THAT be a treat?
I'll get you to marry me yet. You just wait.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2007-03-18 00:00:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
THATS A HUGE BITCH!