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Coming to my senses: Sight

Submitted by Spam at 2007-08-09 04:43:29 EDT
Rating: 1.66 on 17 ratings (17 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

The light above my desk flickers softly and I stare blankly at the reflection cast from the laminated faux-wood fascia of my desk. I don’t know how long it’s been going on for, this listless ambivalence towards what has depressingly become the mainstay of my life but part of me realises that it may have always been like this, that I just haven’t noticed, failed to see how little I care anymore. About anything.

There’s something hypnotic about that flicker though and soon, as I continue my unseeing examination of my desk, all I can see is that flicker, everything else fading into the insignificance it deserves as my whole being becomes enraptured by the digital fight of light and dark as the argon tube slowly gives in it’s fight to illuminate.

And then it stops.

And so do I.

And I look up from my trance for the first time in what seems like hours, years even, and finally I can see exactly what’s going on, right to heart of it all. I gaze out from my now gloomy seat across the almost dazzlingly lit sales floor, a single patch of darkness in a world of cold florescence and I watch as people who I share nothing in common with all fritter and waste the hours of their day in pursuit of things I don’t care about so that can all feel that sense of achievement that for some reason eludes me.

Even the way they move seems jerky, forced, no flow. I’m nothing like you, I say silently to myself as I watch, fascinated that I’d never really seen this before.

And there’s a hazy glow around everything as I stand up for no reason, and suddenly I see the beauty of life, even in a place like this, but the real fucker is I’m sitting watching all this pass me by and part of me preferred it when the light was flickering and my attentions were elsewhere.

But that’s bollocks and we both know it, better to see what you’re missing and at least revel in the pain than to sit here blind and not realise that there’s anything else out there.

Of course, it’s not like this is something that has to be missed.

So I smile.

I smile because I’m fucked if I’m gonna let this bastard pass me by. Not now. Not now I’ve seen it. I’ve never been one to revel in the pain, better to kill yourself striving for something better. Even if you’re not sure what that is.

And my legs are moving of their own accord now, towards the door, there’s no way I’m wasting this moment on this place, I need to get and see the world with my new found eyes whilst I’ve still got this vision, this edge.

And as I step across the threshold and bathe in the warm sunlight of the outside world, everything I am doing makes sense to me for the first time in a long time and if it doesn’t to you right now, my friend, I implore you stick with me until it does.

Because in time, it will.

And you’ll see it all the same way I do

And it’s fucking beautiful.

Review This Item




Submitted by Linus at 2008-08-17 13:50:26 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

+2 Spam. I hope this works--goddamn thing took me an hour to write.

Submitted by Linus at 2008-08-16 11:11:35 EDT (#)
Rating: -2


Submitted by mrwolf at 2008-08-16 10:44:22 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I went out last weekend and it started to pour down as I went to walk home at 3AM. I ran for cover for a moment and then changed my mind and decided I wanted to feel the rain. I was soaked to the skin in 3 seconds because the rain was so heavy.

I walked laughing so hard that the people cowering in the shop door ways were staring and smiling. It was at that moment I decided to lie on the floor. The water ran through the cracks in the pavement tickling my back, I felt like I was lying in a brook.

I continued to laugh as the rain forced my eyes shut.

I have never felt so free and lost as in that moment.


Submitted by Spam at 2007-08-15 19:03:22 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by Stagger_Lee at 2007-08-14 02:47:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

If you aren't already playing the game then you can register at

Once you have logged in and entered your team, click on the 'Leagues'
link you can find on the the right of the page. Now enter the code
30964-165884 to join the private league.


League up.

Submitted by Stagger_Lee at 2007-08-09 22:21:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by TheUniter at 2007-08-09 17:04:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Spam at 2007-08-09 11:41:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2007-08-09 11:15:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

one presumes this is an intro of some sort?



Submitted by Hooli at 2007-08-09 11:25:43 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

"Because in time, it will.

And you'll see it all the same way I do

And it's fucking beautiful. "

Great writing, moving

Submitted by apollo88 at 2007-08-09 11:15:58 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

one presumes this is an intro of some sort?

Submitted by SunnyG at 2007-08-09 10:50:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2007-08-09 10:48:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd at 2007-08-09 09:18:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

for a second I thought you were referring to bart:

I smile because I'm fucked if I'm gonna let this bastard pass me by. Not now. Not now I've seen it. I've never been one to revel in the pain, better to kill yourself striving for something better. Even if you're not sure what that is.

Submitted by Spam at 2007-08-09 09:03:09 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

3 reviews?!

I remember the days when just seeing the name 'Spam' on the front page was enough to garner at least 40 reviews. woe.

Maybe I should stick to writing formulaic office anecdotes in future... well at least after I've finished this shit anyway.

Submitted by particle_man58 at 2007-08-09 06:31:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

My God.... It's full of stars....

Submitted by Merlina at 2007-08-09 05:27:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Berty at 2007-08-09 04:46:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Dude! You should totally quit your job and take up extreme sports!

You know, some of these stories are pretty good. I never knew mice
lived such interesting lives.

-- Homer Simpson
Itchy & Scratchy & Marge