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The BOSH Man! GETS A SUPRISE VISIT!!!

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 15:32:15 EST
Rating: 1.83 on 78 ratings (78 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

CAUTION: The Surgeon General of All that is BOSH warns that reading this post is equal to twenty-nine orgasms.
--



Yesterday was so fuckin bosh I can’t even begin to describe how fuckin bosh it was. Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden, and Molly Hatchet couldn’t make it to tell you about how fuckin bosh my day was, but they all had sex and are proud to announce the birth of their two-headed, fire-breathing, bionic super-child, Yours Truly.

Yesterday was so fuckin bosh I set last years Christmas tree on fire

Yesterday was so fuckin bosh I peed my neighbor’s pants.

Yesterday was so fuckin bosh I shit a cougar.

Yesterday was so fuckin bosh a new color was added to the rainbow.

Powerful fuckin bosh.

So there I was setting traps around Scruggs’ apartment while he was off in the fields sucking cow farts through a garden hose when all of a sudden I hear a knock on the door.

It was The Kid Who Knows Everything!

I told him what Scruggs was up to and he was like “Yea I know”

“Right, my bad. So what’s up dude?”

“Nothing, I’m just here to make a cameo in your post.”

“Righteous”

“Indeed. Listen Boshman, I held a meeting yesterday with Trashbag the Bosh, Bosh Donkey, Wesley Willis, Victor Wooten, and Thunderlips. We all decided that you have been neglecting us quite a bit lately.”

I lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement, The Kid Who Knows Everything continued.

“Whats the deal, Duder?”

“Listen man.. I can only handle so much Wesley Willis.. I mean how much fun can one possibly have coloring walls in old Chinese restaurants? That’s all he wants to do. Ever. I grew tired of trying to make that sound exciting in my posts on ubersite.

Victor Wooten is a crybaby faggot. He is pretty gnarly on the bass, but he jams with Scruggs too much, ya dig?

It wasn’t long ago when I posted about our band that consisted of some bosh mermaids from the sea.. remember that? The Commodore was with us, too. You can’t deny remembering that, you know everything.

Thunderlips has been in the hospital for like four months now. Fucking idiot tried to atomic leg drop Lincoln Hawk from 5 stories up. How the hell am I supposed to include him in my daily activites?

And don’t even mention Scruggs to me. You know better than that (obviously)”

The Kid let out a sort of deflated sigh, knowing I was right on all counts.

“Fuckin A’, Boshman. Powerful. Knowledge. Well lets put this behind us and go to Starfucks. I got a new moped and I brought your blue helmet.”

“PARTY ON KID”

“PARTY ON DUDE”

We sat there for the next 45 minutes wailing on our air guitars. Scruggs came back and told us how sucking cow farts made his asshole pucker. The Kid and I lined up 24 lettuce heads and took slapshots at Scruggs for the next 3 hours. Lieutenant Dan’O Saurus thought Scruggs was an italian sandwich and ate him in one bite, then immediately puked him back up and took a shit on his face.

I just lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement.



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Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-12-07 11:16:06 EST (#)
Rating: 0

CystBosh -

I have conquered all the pornos ever created, our army is strong indeed, what are you orders?

Submitted by orphelia at 2007-12-07 05:41:06 EST (#)
Rating: 2

No Comment

Submitted by beeltea at 2007-12-07 05:28:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2

i love the way he just barges in.

oh man that was funny.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2007-12-07 02:15:52 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Are you sure? Because I had a yeast infection. Or was it rabies?

Submitted by beeltea at 2007-12-07 01:53:48 EST (#)
Rating: 2

well, Paris is just going to have to wait. Get me another ticket or something.

Submitted by beeltea at 2007-12-07 01:49:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

okay. that was pretty funny.

Submitted by corn nugget at 2007-11-20 13:45:40 EST (#)
Rating: 2

You remind me of GLALL

Submitted by ajanssen at 2007-11-20 00:48:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I concur

Submitted by mattnotharry at 2007-11-19 12:37:45 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2007-11-16 04:39:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Some things on Ubersite never change, and knowing that I'll get a chuckle from a Bosh post is one.

Submitted by JonnyX at 2007-11-19 01:58:44 EST (#)
Rating: 2

NEEDS MORE LEO KOTTKE

Submitted by Bubba2341 at 2007-11-18 19:02:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by TheUniter (user info) at 2007-11-18 10:22:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

*****
Do you need Method to read this to you?

Submitted by TheUniter at 2007-11-18 10:22:39 EST (#)
Rating: -1

.

Submitted by TheUniter at 2007-11-18 10:22:27 EST (#)
Rating: -2


Submitted by Bubba2341 at 2007-11-17 23:37:10 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by DeMoNiC at 2007-11-17 22:52:45 EST (#)
Rating: 2

That shit's awesome.

Submitted by lungfish at 2007-11-17 11:41:43 EST (#)
Rating: 2

righteous

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-16 23:57:53 EST (#)
Rating: 0


Submitted by Planet at 2007-11-16 18:15:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by TheDoctor at 2007-11-16 15:12:22 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Submitted by CaptainThorns at 2007-11-16 14:19:38 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Zeglamancer (user info) at 2007-11-16 11:11:01 CST (#)
Ranking: 2

Actually I seem to remember "Whose The Boss" sucking such a tremendous amount of elephant cock that PETA filed a complaint with some minor district court on grounds that while pleasuring an animal could technically be viewed as not abusive, the amount of times in a row however was rather cruel to the elephant.
--------------------

*spits out water*

GodDAMN that was funny.

Submitted by sideshow at 2007-11-16 14:14:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

You are a creative genius

Submitted by Zeglamancer at 2007-11-16 12:11:01 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Actually I seem to remember "Whose The Boss" sucking such a tremendous amount of elephant cock that PETA filed a complaint with some minor district court on grounds that while pleasuring an animal could technically be viewed as not abusive, the amount of times in a row however was rather cruel to the elephant.

Submitted by TonyDanza at 2007-11-16 11:55:31 EST (#)
Rating: 2

The only thing that would make this more BOSH! would be more of ME in it. Everything's more BOSH! when you add Tony Danza.

Submitted by Zeglamancer at 2007-11-16 11:54:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

DudeThatsBOSH and Vermin (in that order) are pretty much the only reason I load up this shithole site every so often. Their material is good enough to re-read once every couple of months or so, and laugh all over again.


I love Boshman more than my unborn children. Also I did get drunk in europe alot. So any children I have that I am unaware of, are definitely second in line for my love.

Submitted by gonefiguring at 2007-11-16 11:54:31 EST (#)
Rating: 2

BOSHtastic

Submitted by pandora at 2007-11-16 11:34:52 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Remember when everybody used to attack DudeThatsBOSH? See Kaos, the shifting tides of conformity aren't always a bad thing!

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-16 10:59:12 EST (#)
Rating: 0

unfortunately that isn't possible.. but if it were, it would've happened

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2007-11-16 10:53:05 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by charminglybeef (user info) at 2007-11-16 00:51:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I enjoyed this very much. The Kid Who Knows Everything - "Yeah I know".

That's funny shit.

Now I'ma write something.
===
So it takes a BOSH post to get CB to write? (Imma assume you also intend to 'post.')

BOSH JUST GOT BOSHER.

Submitted by beeltea at 2007-11-16 09:38:07 EST (#)
Rating: 2

(lights a cigarette and nods in agreement.)

Submitted by Nellypaal at 2007-11-16 05:47:17 EST (#)
Rating: 2

...

Submitted by Yams at 2007-11-16 04:39:21 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Some things on Ubersite never change, and knowing that I'll get a chuckle from a Bosh post is one.

Submitted by orph at 2007-11-16 03:59:25 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Bosh

Submitted by charminglybeef at 2007-11-16 00:51:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I enjoyed this very much. The Kid Who Knows Everything - "Yeah I know".

That's funny shit.

Now I'ma write something.


Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-16 00:05:31 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by ShimishSmortion (user info) at 2007-11-15 23:45:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I love you in the way I love my girl cousins whom I have funny feelings for.
--
that was a close second.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-16 00:05:17 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2007-11-15 22:14:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

you fucking rule.

usually i like to offer some sort of criticism, just for the hell of it, but there is nothing i can add.

how far you think you can develop this style? could it be expanded into a novella or long-short story? would it get worn out too soon for that?
--
best compliment ever?

I don't know how to answer those questions.

I'll get back to you

Submitted by ShimishSmortion at 2007-11-15 23:45:39 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I love you in the way I love my girl cousins whom I have funny feelings for.

Submitted by whiskey_jack at 2007-11-15 23:22:38 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Powerful.

Submitted by ConorJS at 2007-11-15 22:52:26 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I told him what Scruggs was up to and he was like "Yea I know"


Haha!

Submitted by ilikesteak at 2007-11-15 22:45:47 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I never get tired of these.

Submitted by iddqd at 2007-11-15 22:14:50 EST (#)
Rating: 2

you fucking rule.

usually i like to offer some sort of criticism, just for the hell of it, but there is nothing i can add.

how far you think you can develop this style? could it be expanded into a novella or long-short story? would it get worn out too soon for that?

Submitted by TechnoRatty at 2007-11-15 19:59:41 EST (#)
Rating: 2

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

*inhales*

Submitted by scourge at 2007-11-15 19:57:09 EST (#)
Rating: 2

was the surprise visit from a BEAR?

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM?

every time that joke is linked, the redsox post is delayed another day. i was scheduling it for opening day next year as it was. you're gonna be hitting october at this rate, bucko

Submitted by BranDo at 2007-11-15 19:21:44 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Supplies!!




















SuRprise.

Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals at 2007-11-15 19:08:12 EST (#)
Rating: 2

bosh

Submitted by St_Jimmy at 2007-11-15 18:54:10 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I shit a porcupine once.

It was NOT Bosh.

Submitted by Constitution at 2007-11-15 18:47:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2

You should make a movie.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2007-11-15 18:24:08 EST (#)
Rating: 2

w00

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2007-11-15 18:19:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2

The last time Henley and Scruggs got together for their weekly crocheting and knitting party, Scruggs suggested that he and Henley should collaborate on a remake of Hotel California with the lead guitar part being played by him (Scruggs) and on the banjo.

Well!

Henley of course thought it was a fine idea. That is until Walsh caught wind of the plan, came over to Henley's house where he and Scruggs were having tea and lemon curd pastries, and punched both of them in the neck.

Submitted by Yozz at 2007-11-15 18:19:25 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I can't believe the BOSH! man would sit there and listen to that fucked up kid. I would think he would just BOSH! him in the fucking BOSH! and let him go BOSH! himself.

But that's just me.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 18:09:23 EST (#)
Rating: 0

ya that was his first mistake

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2007-11-15 18:08:16 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Not his fault that he was out there sucking cow farts. Henley put him up to it. Said it would get him higher than he's ever been before.

And you know how Scruggs is. He believes anything a white guy with an afro tells him.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 18:05:16 EST (#)
Rating: 0

i know right

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2007-11-15 18:00:31 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Friggin' Scruggs and his cowfarts.

Submitted by haikumikoo at 2007-11-15 17:52:18 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2007-11-15 17:42:52 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I dig.

Submitted by experima at 2007-11-15 17:34:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH (user info) at 2007-11-15 14:28:50 PST (#)
Ranking: 0

32 confirmed orgasms, powerful.

============


yes indeed it was

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 17:30:13 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Zampano: I actually had 'played' written in there first.

Even The BOSH Man! proofreads once in a while.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 17:29:27 EST (#)
Rating: 0

FG: your welcome :)

vexx: explain it to them haha

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2007-11-15 17:28:50 EST (#)
Rating: 0

32 confirmed orgasms, powerful.

Submitted by vexx at 2007-11-15 17:03:07 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I'm reviewing a study and the Principal Investigator is named Dr. Bosch.

Seriously.

No one in my office could figure out why I was laughing =(

Submitted by triangle_man at 2007-11-15 16:34:22 EST (#)
Rating: 2

OK ok it's BOSH
Poor Scruggs though

Submitted by experima at 2007-11-15 16:31:37 EST (#)
Rating: 2

well that's good cos I just had 30

Submitted by Fungah at 2007-11-15 16:17:16 EST (#)
Rating: 2

WOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LIEUTANANT DAN-OSAURUS PLUS FUCKIN TWO!

BOSH AS HELL!

Submitted by Sinistral at 2007-11-15 16:11:44 EST (#)
Rating: 2

ZOMFG YOUR SHIT POSTS ARE KILLING TEH UBER!!!!!

And I think that's bosh.

Submitted by CaptainThorns at 2007-11-15 16:10:54 EST (#)
Rating: 1

As BOSH as this was, I have to dock you a point for dissin' my hombre Victor Wooten. :(

Submitted by Axolotl at 2007-11-15 16:07:28 EST (#)
Rating: 2

BOSH

Submitted by Zampano at 2007-11-15 15:59:49 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Somebody who doesn't believe 'plays' an air guitar.

Somebody who's so fucking bosh he shits a cougar 'wails' on an air guitar.

Well played.

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2007-11-15 15:59:11 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This was a +1 until Quint came along.

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2007-11-15 15:57:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2

CAUTION: The Surgeon General of All that is BOSH warns that reading this post is equal to twenty-nine orgasms.
--
I had 2 reading the username, alone.

Submitted by Darth_Famine at 2007-11-15 15:56:23 EST (#)
Rating: 2

is it really the kid that knows everything or his evil twin, the kid that only THINKS he knows everything?


Submitted by DangerPants at 2007-11-15 15:56:12 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn.

-- Homer Simpson
I Love Lisa

Submitted by Quint at 2007-11-15 15:55:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

"Yesterday was so fuckin bosh I shit a cougar."

--

What was Method's Mom doing in your ass?

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd at 2007-11-15 15:52:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

+2 Wesley Willis

Submitted by Susie_Derkins at 2007-11-15 15:51:00 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Bosh.

Submitted by j0andre1 at 2007-11-15 15:47:43 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2007-11-15 15:43:40 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I'm so happy now.

So very happy.

Thank you.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2007-11-15 15:40:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I have no idea what just happened.
That's bosh.

Submitted by AJ at 2007-11-15 15:34:32 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Joseph Heller-esque.


Asleep at the switch! I wasn't asleep! I was drunk!

-- Homer Simpson
Homer the Vigilante