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100 things I dislike with a picture. I'm no whore.

Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2009-02-20 14:51:29 EST
Rating: 1.33 on 7 ratings (7 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

100 things I dislike, the sequel to the highly successful 100 things I like, and brother for life of the as of yet unpublished 100 things that I'm ambiguous about.

1) False advertisements
2) Dinosaurs (Of the living and want to devour me variety)
3) Taking things out of context
4) Exit signs that lead to brick walls.
5) Burglars.
6) Hamburglars
7) Butt pirates
8) Cavalier behavior
9) So called “Behavioral Specialists”
10) The fact that people have entirely the wrong ideas about chivalry. (Under Chivalric rule, you can’t rape a woman, unless you kill her husband first, then it’s all peaches and cream…..of man.)
11) History has historically been written by those who conquer.
12) There are no new lands of the Earth for me to conquer and set up a dictatorship.
13) Tonga’s dashing of my dreams by annexing the micro-nation built by “that guy.”
14) Gang mentality.
15) The notion that everyone is a “special and unique.” I can name 5 useless people right now.
16) Neo-anything. There’s usually nothing new about it. If there is, use your head meat and give it a new name. My vocabulary will thank you.
17) People’s misunderstandings regarding sanity. It’s entirely relative you know.
18) Doors which have signs that say “One way” but open in both directions.
19) Middle Eastern politics. I’m ready to nuke the holy lands and be done with it.
20) American politics. I’m ready to revolt and be done with it. No taxation without accurate representation.
21) Parasitic Organisms.
22) 2 words: Moon Jaguars. Silent killers which strike from above in slow-motion.
23) Apathy
24) Paper Cuts.
25) The idea that our mentalities are shaped by civilizations of which we know less than we think we know. What would life be like today if not for Rome?
26) Low budget porn. Nobody will believe you’re 18 just because you’re wearing a cheerleader’s uniform. You’re not wearing it for long.
27) Turtles, with their smugness inside their cozy, safe shells.
28) Feral cats. Leave my cat’s food alone.
29) Hipsters. Next time I see you walking and talking, I’m gonna snatch your newest gadget and throw it into traffic. Go fetch.
30) Gingivitis.
31) Steak Tatar. It’s just uncooked hamburger and you aren’t fooling anyone.
32) Red Onions. I have no place for you in my salad.
33) News channels. I only need the news once a day, and only the real news, thanks.
34) Ignorance. I’m not blissful about your ignorance at all.
35) “Though we know that god created dinosaurs, we don’t know if Jesus rode them, but he probably did!”
36) The pseudo-Afro-Christian cult down the road from me that believes in going “back to Africa.” Are you retarded? Ever heard of Liberia?
37) “Do The Right Thing.” I don’t get it. What kind of statement are you trying to make? Radio Raheem was an asshole.
38) Mondays. Yes, it’s cliché, and yes, I’m comfortable with that.
39) Boredom, thus lists like this come in to existence.
40) CGI Animation. Lazy bastards.
41) The abundance of commercials out there these days that don’t give you any clue what they’re trying to sell. Stop it.
42) Riding behind a slow driver on a gravel/dirt road.
43) Winter.
44) China. I don’t like you, your terracotta warriors, or your policies of selling us cheaply manufactured, poisonous, exploitative crap. Fuck your wall.
45) Partisan Politics and a 2 party system.
46) How difficult it is to come up with 100 things I dislike. This should be easier.
47) Marital fights. We can get downright vicious.
48) The state of Alabama. All of it.
49) Eskimos. Learn to adapt to a new environment and I guarantee your lives will improve.
50) Halfway points that take a half-day to reach.
51) The ocean. That’s right, fuck you, you big blue watery mass. We can’t drink you, you harbor things that eat us, and you take up too much space. You want us dead.
52) Cults of personality, regardless of the person.
53) Russia. I still don’t trust you, and never will.
54) Platypi- How do I pluralize your name? What’s your purpose here on earth? You just don’t fit in with your poisonous egg laying mammal-like selves.
55) Morality laws and sin taxes. I don’t go to your church, and don’t adhere to your rules.
56) Georgia Sheriffs. Find something better to do with your time than harassing me for $.
57) The current economy.
58) People who’re only famous for being famous. You’ve contributed nothing, congrats.
59) Pine trees. I can’t explain this one at all.
60) Clowns, which require no explanation.
61) Mimes. Which deserve their own number and level of hell.
62) Microbial life. Sorry Great Grandfather x 1 billion. You usually try to kill me now, and I feel like I hardly know you anymore.
63) The return of boxy looking cars. Why?
64) Renal calculi.
65) Unnecessary use of Latin by the medical community when explaining things to patients.
66) Smog.
67) The appalling lack of decent radio stations in Atlanta.
68) The lack of inspiration I’ve had recently.
69) Sweet-gums and Boxwoods. Why won’t you die already?
70) Big fish in little ponds.
71) The word “fetid.” It even sounds nasty.
72) Intentional misspellings in business names. “Kozy Kitchen” or “Karz R Us” I hate you both, so very, very much that I can’t put it into words. Probably because a lifetime of reading you has rendered me stupid.
73) (Fill in the blank here and you can play too.)
74) Having different sizes and types of toner and ink cartridges. Why can’t you standardize the system so we don’t need to write down 5 different product codes when we order office supplies?
75) 3 quarter markers. Who marks in quarters? Everyone. Know why? God-damned Romans again.
76) “____________-Americans” Pick an identity and stick with it.
77) My neighbor’s second story window that overlooks my first floor bathroom.
78) Feral cats. Quit fighting at 3 am with my cats! I need sleep!
79) My neighborhood’s roaming dogs. The bastards ate my rabbits and tear up trash because the sheriff’s office is too busy bothering me for $ to enforce leash laws.
Fluffy the poodle won’t be so cute in a flattened state.
80) My neighbors (mostly). HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF SPAYING/NEUTERING?
81) Head Start. We had it when we were young too, but it was private, they called it pre-school, and you learned things there.
82) No Child Left Behind. Who came up with this idea?
83) “Eco-Friendly” toilet paper. WTF? It’s paper, that you wipe shit with. It doesn’t get much more eco friendly than that.
84) Heavily chlorinated water. I’ll drink you, but I don’t have to like you.
85) My office’s bathroom. I don’t want to be able to hear the inside of my co-worker’s stomachs, but I can.
86) Blind adherence to laws. You’re letting a murderer go free because the gun with fingerprints on it wasn’t filed away correctly? Really?
87) Dogmatism.
88) –Ism’s in general for that matter. Except for prisms, you guys are alright.
89) Doctor’s with un-pronounceable names. I respect your culture, but can’t I just call you Dr. Raj for short?
90) Being 10 numbers short of finishing and the well is running dry.
91) Gnats. #1, what asshole named you that? #2, my nose isn’t your new home.
92) Israel. You’re not special, and you’re just making the world worse for everyone.
93) The sadness I experienced on the day I realized that God wasn’t looking out for me specifically.
94) People who try to bring others down just because they’re down.
95) Game shows.
96) Reality Television.
97) I’m almost finished and I’ve finally caught my second wind of hate.
98) Oops, it’s gone again.
99) 80’s hairstyles. 70’s too for that matter. Fuck it, the notion of “style” in itself is worthy of my hate.
100) ___________________ “Whaddya got?”


As an adjunct to this list, here is another list, of people who are just plain awesome. If you're not on this list, you should want to be.

How Monkeyswithguns has rated other users
orph (user info) 78 on 39 = 2.00
inion_de_trua (user info) 50 on 25 = 2.00
forensicgirl3 (user info) 46 on 23 = 2.00
Berty (user info) 44 on 22 = 2.00
gonefiguring (user info) 26 on 13 = 2.00
ksj3888 (user info) 24 on 12 = 2.00
Spam (user info) 24 on 12 = 2.00
write-of-way (user info) 22 on 11 = 2.00
DonovanMD (user info) 18 on 9 = 2.00
darko (user info) 16 on 8 = 2.00
St_Jimmy (user info) 16 on 8 = 2.00
LittleMonster (user info) 16 on 8 = 2.00
DudeThatsBOSH (user info) 61 on 31 = 1.97
Grimm (user info) 61 on 31 = 1.97
Sacrilicious (user info) 53 on 27 = 1.96
loki (user info) 53 on 27 = 1.96
DrogoRoch (user info) 51 on 26 = 1.96
TheGoat (user info) 43 on 22 = 1.95
X54 (user info) 76 on 39 = 1.95
DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) 37 on 19 = 1.95
Ballare (user info) 70 on 36 = 1.94
orphelia (user info) 35 on 18 = 1.94
CaptainThorns (user info) 66 on 34 = 1.94
lungfish (user info) 31 on 16 = 1.94
Brdn_Nkd (user info) 197 on 102 = 1.93
beer-turtle (user info) 56 on 29 = 1.93
earth_collapse (user info) 23 on 12 = 1.92
GangsterSquid (user info) 44 on 23 = 1.91
Orgasmatron (user info) 65 on 34 = 1.91
skrapmetal (user info) 42 on 22 = 1.91
pen_name (user info) 21 on 11 = 1.91
snagglepuss (user info) 21 on 11 = 1.91
Yozz (user info) 40 on 21 = 1.90
shadow (user info) 59 on 31 = 1.90
beeltea (user info) 85 on 45 = 1.89
peacenik_in_hell (user info) 17 on 9 = 1.89
ih8u2man (user info) 17 on 9 = 1.89
Unabonger (user info) 17 on 9 = 1.89
HighVoltage900 (user info) 17 on 9 = 1.89
sir_cowman (user info) 49 on 26 = 1.88
F.J.Bell (user info) 128 on 68 = 1.88
The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) 126 on 67 = 1.88
redskieslookfake (user info) 15 on 8 = 1.88
Adam_Warlock (user info) 15 on 8 = 1.88
Aussie_Ants_4.0 (user info) 15 on 8 = 1.88
rob_berg (user info) 86 on 46 = 1.87
Razor (user info) 28 on 15 = 1.87
Squirrelly_Girl (user info) 39 on 21 = 1.86
Merlina (user info) 48 on 26 = 1.85
nicballs (user info) 24 on 13 = 1.85
Circe (user info) 24 on 13 = 1.85
Axolotl (user info) 92 on 50 = 1.84
creep_firebombing (user info) 90 on 49 = 1.84
Banjo (user info) 44 on 24 = 1.83
jasumthin (user info) 22 on 12 = 1.83
Hornet (user info) 22 on 12 = 1.83
SkullBiter (user info) 31 on 17 = 1.82
Fey (user info) 31 on 17 = 1.82
experima (user info) 51 on 28 = 1.82
hour_man (user info) 71 on 39 = 1.82
lostnphound (user info) 40 on 22 = 1.82
Method (user info) 20 on 11 = 1.82
ChaosJester (user info) 96 on 53 = 1.81
Stabkill (user info) 27 on 15 = 1.80
coley (user info) 27 on 15 = 1.80
Kracka (user info) 18 on 10 = 1.80
polyamorousaj (user info) 32 on 18 = 1.78
ooQueso (user info) 16 on 9 = 1.78
YELLOW-MAN (user info) 16 on 9 = 1.78
Leonore (user info) 16 on 9 = 1.78
haikumikoo (user info) 55 on 31 = 1.77
EmissionImpossible (user info) 39 on 22 = 1.77
DeathJester (user info) 23 on 13 = 1.77
bart (user info) 23 on 13 = 1.77
DeadToast (user info) 99 on 56 = 1.77
AsshOly (user info) 30 on 17 = 1.76
kaos-king (user info) 182 on 104 = 1.75
i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) 28 on 16 = 1.75
SunnyG (user info) 21 on 12 = 1.75
Director (user info) 68 on 39 = 1.74
HurtByTheSun (user info) 134 on 77 = 1.74
Adamdidit2u (user info) 52 on 30 = 1.73
sicosemen (user info) 83 on 48 = 1.73
shandythedog (user info) 50 on 29 = 1.72
ilikesteak (user info) 105 on 61 = 1.72
maiorano84 (user info) 74 on 43 = 1.72
Jeanneee (user info) 118 on 69 = 1.71
8bithero (user info) 29 on 17 = 1.71
icarus1987 (user info) 46 on 27 = 1.70
Snark (user info) 22 on 13 = 1.69
scourge (user info) 22 on 13 = 1.69
corn_nugget (user info) 55 on 33 = 1.67
TigerLilly (user info) 50 on 30 = 1.67
FATMANTPK (user info) 30 on 18 = 1.67
Paralyzed_By_Hope (user info) 25 on 15 = 1.67
iddqd (user info) 25 on 15 = 1.67
sandmantate (user info) 20 on 12 = 1.67
Ejryuu (user info) 15 on 9 = 1.67
Foolproof (user info) 15 on 9 = 1.67
triangle_man (user info) 15 on 9 = 1.67
someone (user info) 15 on 9 = 1.67
Jack_McCallum (user info) 204 on 123 = 1.66
Sinistral (user info) 28 on 17 = 1.65
TechnoRatty (user info) 46 on 28 = 1.64
phuzzygish (user info) 31 on 19 = 1.63
Scott_James (user info) 13 on 8 = 1.62
FALLEN (user info) 42 on 26 = 1.62
MouthSore (user info) 21 on 13 = 1.62
Danger_Ranger (user info) 16 on 10 = 1.60
NintendoCzar (user info) 46 on 29 = 1.59
Darth_Famine (user info) 19 on 12 = 1.58
Falafel (user info) 33 on 21 = 1.57
locksly (user info) 31 on 20 = 1.55
Caulaincourt (user info) 68 on 44 = 1.55
apollo88 (user info) 23 on 15 = 1.53
Fungah (user info) 119 on 79 = 1.51
indoninja (user info) 30 on 20 = 1.50
theBarron (user info) 18 on 12 = 1.50
JonnyX (user info) 12 on 8 = 1.50
BubbaEarl (user info) 12 on 8 = 1.50
BeforeEmily (user info) 34 on 23 = 1.48
ShapeShifter (user info) 28 on 19 = 1.47
simple_catalyst (user info) 19 on 13 = 1.46
Bubba2341 (user info) 19 on 13 = 1.46
TooMuchMan (user info) 13 on 9 = 1.44
netimportant (user info) 20 on 14 = 1.43
Empathetic (user info) 27 on 19 = 1.42
Phallic_Cymbals (user info) 41 on 29 = 1.41
8track (user info) 11 on 8 = 1.38
Rhymenocerous (user info) 34 on 25 = 1.36
bob (user info) 13 on 10 = 1.30
Flak (user info) 13 on 10 = 1.30
MudWhistle (user info) 66 on 51 = 1.29
hidden101 (user info) 20 on 16 = 1.25
SgtHartman (user info) 32 on 26 = 1.23
sage104 (user info) 25 on 21 = 1.19
Beano312003 (user info) 13 on 11 = 1.18
ghola (user info) 87 on 76 = 1.14
StereoTypist (user info) 9 on 8 = 1.12
rubbermaid (user info) 11 on 10 = 1.10
frankthebear (user info) 26 on 24 = 1.08
Lambchop (user info) 7 on 8 = 0.88
baronMunchausen (user info) 7 on 10 = 0.70
GnarlsBarkley (user info) 6 on 10 = 0.60
iambetteratit (user info) 3 on 9 = 0.33
zoobie2000 (user info) 3 on 9 = 0.33
MickGinny (user info) 16 on 289 = 0.06
monkeyswithguns (user info) 12 on 217 = 0.06
daddiesgurl01 (user info) 0 on 10 = 0.00
PerkMan (user info) -3 on 15 = -0.20
loopdeloo (user info) -4 on 14 = -0.29

How other users have rated Monkeyswithguns
LegoSockPuppet (user info) 54 on 27 = 2.00
shadow (user info) 30 on 15 = 2.00
orph (user info) 30 on 15 = 2.00
Banjo (user info) 26 on 13 = 2.00
lostnphound (user info) 26 on 13 = 2.00
Lib (user info) 24 on 12 = 2.00
Brdn_Nkd (user info) 63 on 32 = 1.97
orphelia (user info) 96 on 49 = 1.96
redskieslookfake (user info) 102 on 54 = 1.89
F.J.Bell (user info) 60 on 32 = 1.88
CaptainThorns (user info) 103 on 55 = 1.87
corn_nugget (user info) 24 on 13 = 1.85
experima (user info) 70 on 38 = 1.84
Sacrilicious (user info) 53 on 29 = 1.83
EmissionImpossible (user info) 31 on 17 = 1.82
Amontillado (user info) 20 on 11 = 1.82
ChaosJester (user info) 32 on 18 = 1.78
Ballare (user info) 16 on 9 = 1.78
rob_berg (user info) 56 on 32 = 1.75
Jeanneee (user info) 35 on 20 = 1.75
DudeThatsBOSH (user info) 14 on 8 = 1.75
sicosemen (user info) 19 on 11 = 1.73
haikumikoo (user info) 59 on 35 = 1.69
sage104 (user info) 18 on 11 = 1.64
forensicgirl3 (user info) 21 on 13 = 1.62
Yozz (user info) 40 on 25 = 1.60
The_Drake (user info) 15 on 10 = 1.50
Merlina (user info) 12 on 8 = 1.50
kaos-king (user info) 12 on 8 = 1.50
Doodles (user info) 22 on 15 = 1.47
skrapmetal (user info) 16 on 11 = 1.45
i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) 16 on 11 = 1.45
triangle_man (user info) 13 on 9 = 1.44
Jack_McCallum (user info) 17 on 12 = 1.42
Berty (user info) 21 on 15 = 1.40
BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) 18 on 13 = 1.38
SgtHartman (user info) 26 on 19 = 1.37
lungfish (user info) 16 on 12 = 1.33
sandmantate (user info) 24 on 19 = 1.26
FALLEN (user info) 10 on 8 = 1.25
no1hasdis (user info) 13 on 11 = 1.18
ilikesteak (user info) 14 on 13 = 1.08
czwij (user info) 9 on 9 = 1.00
Wildman (user info) 8 on 8 = 1.00
beer-turtle (user info) 9 on 10 = 0.90
scourge (user info) 18 on 23 = 0.78
MudWhistle (user info) 26 on 34 = 0.76
Ltap (user info) 8 on 11 = 0.73
HotWillie (user info) 6 on 9 = 0.67
TheUniter (user info) 18 on 34 = 0.53
ghola (user info) 6 on 13 = 0.46
DeathJester (user info) 4 on 9 = 0.44
apollo88 (user info) 2 on 9 = 0.22
inion_de_trua (user info) 4 on 21 = 0.19
monkeyswithguns (user info) 12 on 217 = 0.06
HurtByTheSun (user info) 1 on 21 = 0.05
JonnyX (user info) 0 on 10 = 0.00
Dervel (user info) 0 on 12 = 0.00
Shlongy (user info) -10 on 38 = -0.26


I waited all night in the corner for the Moon Jaguars to attack. Turns out they were daytime hunters.jpg
I waited all night in the corner for the Moon Jaguars to attack. Turns out they were daytime hunters.jpg


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Reviews


Submitted by AJ at 2009-02-20 16:53:53 EST (#)
Rating: 2

HUZZAH

I'm on the list.

Submitted by scourge at 2009-02-20 15:42:48 EST (#)
Rating: 2

hey ho

Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2009-02-20 14:57:21 EST (#)
Rating: -2

oops.

Submitted by The_Drake at 2009-02-20 14:56:59 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I've always wondered exactly how many pores are on your head...now i can count them all.

Submitted by Merlina at 2009-02-20 14:54:09 EST (#)
Rating: 2

pics a bit small - try reposting...

Submitted by PerkMan at 2009-02-20 14:53:51 EST (#)
Rating: 2

hahha a list I made. Succumb to the perky goodness!

Submitted by dangerdude at 2009-02-20 14:53:34 EST (#)
Rating: -2


100 things I dislike, the sequel to the highly successful 100 things I like, and brother for life of the as of yet unpublished 100 things that I'm ambiguous about.

---
I already can tell what is going to be #1 on that list.
your gender.













Fag


Homer: There couldn't be heaven if there weren't a hell.

Bart: Who's in there?

Homer: Oh, uh ... Hitler's dog. And that dog Nixon had, whassisname, um,
Chester ...

Lisa: Checkers.

Homer: Yeah! One of the Lassies is in there, too. The mean one -- the
one that mauled Jimmy.

Dog of Death