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Ducky Doesn't Muse, But Rather Whines and Bitches About Digging Holes

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 09:11:13 EDT
Rating: 1.78 on 85 ratings (85 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

Soft grassy fields do not denote soft soil underneath. Not even close mind you…like one of those more to the book than just the cover or beauty is only skin deep or thinking if you’re REALLY hungry you could eat carrion and might get only slightly ill sort of deals…or something.

Question.

Who the fuck puts fifteen people on the chute of an 80 year old bee-hive burner anyways? Oh it’s fine is it…we’ll just trust the bracing, and by bracing I mean one support that’s rotted out, another that is non-existent, and a ‘third’ that is hanging on for dear life. The kids jump past the hopper and run up the chute, jumping and banging on it like fearless little tightrope walkers, while the adults clutch and the edges and make their way up on their knees, careful not to look over the edge. The kids see their parents squirming, smirk, and jump on it some more. This creates a wave effect, loud creaking noises, and wrinkly ever whitened knuckles belonging to terrified old people who are quickly beginning to feel like a pack of assholes for being up there.

And who, after all of this, is going to be put in charge of re-bracing it.

“Just come and dig a few holes for us won’t you love? I’ll make you tea and smoke my face off and then I’ll put you to work. It’s only a few holes, 2 feet by 2 feet. Make sure you’re with Jack when he crosses the highway. You know he’s an old boy with the road sense of a drunken turkey”.

I am now in possession of an old wheelbarrow with a flat tire, a shovel, some gardening gloves, a blind dog, and just before sending me on my way, I am given a long hard pointy metal spike thing that is as tall as I am and weighs as much as a small, portly elephant – God knows what THAT’S for. I’ve just recently been a dickhead and washed my nano, so am now using my back-up Sony-Go, which is a complete piece of shit, and should be called the Sony-No, ftl, btw.

I quickly realized what the awesome 5 squillion pound javelin in my wheelbarrow was for, because when I actually got there, to the dirt, I found that there was indeed, very little dirt. Shovel in hand (staff-variety because the mad ache that comes with the shock running up your arm using one of those t-types is just fucking unbearable…I tried to tree-plant with one of them once upon a time and it was almost as excruciating as snagging your foot on a slash-pile and hanging upside down for over an hour because the trees on your hips are too heavy or your stomach is too soft to reach up and loosen it, and what could be better when you’re in the middle of a cut block in the mountains where you can’t see the person in the next block because of the black swarms of mosquitoes and flies? What indeed.)…I forgot what was on the other side of that massive bracketed section…right…shovel in hand I began to dig through solid rock. I broke up the rock into smaller chunks of rock, and then used the metal monstrosity to gain leverage in prying said chunks loose.

I thought it would be a 2 hour job max.

Lolzerz.

6 hours later I marched (stumbled) triumphantly (exhaustedly) across the field and staggered across the highway with Jack in tow, both of us looking like drunken turkeys.

“Did you get the holes under the hopper?”

“Huh?”

“The holes under the hopper. I have to warn you, they’re going to be the shits”.

“I….I actually have some pressing engagements with stuff and I need to be at this place like, pretty soon…a beer? Sure I have time for a beer with you auntie…”

3 beers later and I’m under the fucking hopper.






Have a beautiful Monday Uber.







ist2_6444942-old-beehive-burner.jpg
ist2_6444942-old-beehive-burner.jpg


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Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-08 11:51:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-07-08 08:35:20 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-07-07 13:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-07-08 00:45:38 WST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'd like to become an honorary Aussie. So I can be rude and obnoxious and get away with it.
------------
I've never gotten away with it, random strangers feel like they have to correct my behaviour.
All you have to do fg is make every statement sound like a question, drink copious amounts of beer and have absolutely zero cultural value and you're one of us.

------------

Aussies are Canadians?

____________

No Snark. Thankfully that hasn't been allowed. They'd steal all of our plaid jackets.

Submitted by Snark at 2009-07-08 11:35:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-07-07 13:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-07-08 00:45:38 WST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'd like to become an honorary Aussie. So I can be rude and obnoxious and get away with it.
------------
I've never gotten away with it, random strangers feel like they have to correct my behaviour.
All you have to do fg is make every statement sound like a question, drink copious amounts of beer and have absolutely zero cultural value and you're one of us.

------------

Aussies are Canadians?

Submitted by Shlongy at 2009-07-07 19:06:17 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

I'd like to bang another Aussie broad. It's been like 27 years since I've done so and I imagine they changed, probably for the better.

Submitted by TuTs at 2009-07-07 13:06:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-07-08 00:45:38 WST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'd like to become an honorary Aussie. So I can be rude and obnoxious and get away with it.
------------
I've never gotten away with it, random strangers feel like they have to correct my behaviour.
All you have to do fg is make every statement sound like a question, drink copious amounts of beer and have absolutely zero cultural value and you're one of us.

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 12:45:38 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'd like to become an honorary Aussie. So I can be rude and obnoxious and get away with it.


Submitted by scourge at 2009-07-07 12:20:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

it's sort of a limp wristed flap combined with disdain and a single cocked eyebrow. throw in a jacket with suede elbow patches if you really want to seal the deal.



and come on, ei... not a retard, more like a half trained monkey.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 12:11:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

THATS IT!!! IM OFF HOME!!

DARN AND BLAST THE LOT OF YOU!!

pip pip


Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 12:07:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-07-07 11:03:47 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2


then i get the secret decoder ring and get to learn the handshake.

=====

You mean the limp wristed flap?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 12:05:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

you treat me like im some kind of retard...hmmmm

Submitted by scourge at 2009-07-07 12:03:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i'm only an honorary brit. his majesty apollo signed the confirmation papers. redskies is my sponsor. and ei is the burden i have to bear (timespan indefinite) until such time as i am allowed to become a full fledged member.

then i get the secret decoder ring and get to learn the handshake.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 11:57:10 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i hate it when girls pick on me




















or do i






dun dun dunnnnnnnnn

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 11:52:28 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I could be wrong, Ducks. We'll wait until he rears his head to confirm or deny.

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 11:47:52 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-07 10:27:32 CDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:22:17 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-07 11:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:05:08 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm pretty sure TuTs is right.

I want Scourges motorcycle...even if it is british.
------------
RACIST!!
________________________

OML i am not even a little bit racist. You sir, have deeply hurt my feelings with your slanderous accusation, leading me to believe that you are NOT HARMLESS AT ALL. I'm glad you have ice cream in the Britain. And all this time I thought you only had tea. When did that come about?
-----------
IM AN ANIMAL BABY!!!!!!!!!!!

we graviated to ice cream shortly after the gulf war, when our American heroes flew over old blightly, launching picnic baskets out of there helicopters full of ice cream, oh we were so happy. 3 cheers for those generous brave americans and I love President Bush. Thank you for bringing democracy to Iraq and picnic baskets of ice cream to Britain!

you love tea ducky and you know it!

=======

Don't take that ice cream launching gesture as benevolence on our part. It was especially hard frozen. We were trying to knock you all in the head.

BECAUSE YOU PEOPLE WON'T LET THE TEA THING GO! DUMP A FEW CRATES OF TEA INTO THE DRINK AND YOU NEVER LIVE IT DOWN!

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 11:43:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

we have:

corn bread.
dried beef
salt pork or bacon
rice
sliced carrots
jam
water
nuts
apples or peaches
dried fruit

and

cod-liver oil

so depends if you have a sweet tooth or not

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-07 11:39:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

i can't imagine crumpets go well with coffee, or do you have other food over there, like aside from icecream?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 11:36:59 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

well thats logical.

I like coffee if ive run out of tea or my silver teapot and doilies are dirty.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-07 11:33:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

i like tea if i've run oot of coffee.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 11:27:32 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:22:17 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-07 11:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:05:08 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm pretty sure TuTs is right.

I want Scourges motorcycle...even if it is british.
------------
RACIST!!
________________________

OML i am not even a little bit racist. You sir, have deeply hurt my feelings with your slanderous accusation, leading me to believe that you are NOT HARMLESS AT ALL. I'm glad you have ice cream in the Britain. And all this time I thought you only had tea. When did that come about?
-----------
IM AN ANIMAL BABY!!!!!!!!!!!

we graviated to ice cream shortly after the gulf war, when our American heroes flew over old blightly, launching picnic baskets out of there helicopters full of ice cream, oh we were so happy. 3 cheers for those generous brave americans and I love President Bush. Thank you for bringing democracy to Iraq and picnic baskets of ice cream to Britain!

you love tea ducky and you know it!

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-07 11:23:52 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

I thought it was forensic...scourge himself is clearly British...he just pretends to be an American.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-07 11:22:17 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-07 11:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:05:08 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm pretty sure TuTs is right.

I want Scourges motorcycle...even if it is british.
------------
RACIST!!
________________________

OML i am not even a little bit racist. You sir, have deeply hurt my feelings with your slanderous accusation, leading me to believe that you are NOT HARMLESS AT ALL. I'm glad you have ice cream in the Britain. And all this time I thought you only had tea. When did that come about?

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 11:21:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I don't think Scourge's motorcycle is British.


Submitted by TuTs at 2009-07-07 11:21:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

I'm always right I have an inny penis.

Is British a race?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 11:13:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-07 16:05:08 BST (#)
Ranking: 0

I'm pretty sure TuTs is right.

I want Scourges motorcycle...even if it is british.
------------
RACIST!!

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-07 11:05:08 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

I'm pretty sure TuTs is right.

I want Scourges motorcycle...even if it is british.

Submitted by TuTs at 2009-07-07 10:42:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'm pretty sure POHM (prisoner of her majesty) was what they called the convicts on the boat and then over the years the Australians switched it to refer to the English.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 09:18:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

is that true? what a great nickname! nearly as witty as being called limeys

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-07 09:11:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-07-07 09:06:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Sarge, Pom (Pome, Pommy, Pommies, etc.) is Aussie slang for the English. I've heard it means Prisoner of Mother England or Prisoner Of her Majesty.
=========================
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SICK BURN

thank you FG.

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 09:09:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I don't know. I shouldn't speak about things I'm not sure of. Besides, they get defensive when Yanks attempt to answer questions such as these.


Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-07 09:06:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Sarge, Pom (Pome, Pommy, Pommies, etc.) is Aussie slang for the English. I've heard it means Prisoner of Mother England or Prisoner Of her Majesty.


Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 08:49:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i think i turned toe on with that joke, she'll be a while.

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-07 08:43:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-07 08:35:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."

The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."
=======================================
ahahahahahahahahaha

Toe, whats a Pommy? Pomeranian?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 08:41:08 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

thats because we are SO funny, take me for example.

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2009-07-07 08:40:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

A Pommy walks into the room and everyone just laughs.

Laughs and laughs.


Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-07 08:35:16 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."

The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-07 08:31:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe (user info) at 2009-07-07 08:23:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Was just being observant, like you were hun.

Dammit, when i'm not trying to be mean - I still come across as mean.
====================================
I was just kidding, I know how sensitive you are about being mean.

*sniffle* *wipes tear*

heard any good Dingo jokes lately?

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2009-07-07 08:23:29 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Was just being observant, like you were hun.

Dammit, when i'm not trying to be mean - I still come across as mean.

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-07 08:12:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

do I sense some animosity?

what did I ever do to you?!

and BTW im not on here half as much as I used to be, so NYAH.

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2009-07-07 07:51:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Everyday Hartman sighting below.

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-07 07:43:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Toe sighting below...

Submitted by i_can_get_you_a_toe at 2009-07-07 07:41:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I read this twice. I liked it both times.

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2009-07-07 07:29:04 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-07-07 00:49:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

-----------
haha ducky thinks you're a dude because you are a dyke

LISTEN UP MORTICIA I'M SICK OF YOU SAYING I DON'T MAKE MUCH SENSE. JUST REMEMBER I ONCE WROTE A POST PRETENDING TO BE YOU AND EVERYONE FELL FOR IT BECAUSE NOT ONLY DID I SOUND LIKE SOME CHEAP VAG STARVED TART I WROTE IT LIKE YOU SO IF I WROTE SOMETHING THAT EVERYONE ELSE THOUGHT WAS YOU AND IT WASN'T THEN WHO'S THE ONE NOW WHO DOESN'T MAKE A WHOLE LOT OF SENSE VALERIE YOU STUPID GOTHIC HALFLING IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY POSTS THEN STAY THE HELL OFF THEM. I KNOW - PRETEND MY POSTS ARE A PENIS YOU CARPET GOBBLING OOMPA LOOMPA.
===

Sigh.













WILL YOU JUST ADMIT, ONCE AND FOR ALL, THAT YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME?

Submitted by YourNameHere at 2009-07-07 03:37:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2009-07-07 00:49:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-07-06 18:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Honestly, Duck- I understood so little of this I thought Danger_Ranger wrote it.

You're always doing stuff. Doing stuff is cool.
______________________________________________________

I'll take that as a compliment - I love D_R's writing.

You think digging holes is cool? Dude if you're ever in BC we can hang out and dig holes. And drink beer, which is mandatory.
------------
haha ducky thinks you're a dude because you are a dyke

LISTEN UP MORTICIA I'M SICK OF YOU SAYING I DON'T MAKE MUCH SENSE. JUST REMEMBER I ONCE WROTE A POST PRETENDING TO BE YOU AND EVERYONE FELL FOR IT BECAUSE NOT ONLY DID I SOUND LIKE SOME CHEAP VAG STARVED TART I WROTE IT LIKE YOU SO IF I WROTE SOMETHING THAT EVERYONE ELSE THOUGHT WAS YOU AND IT WASN'T THEN WHO'S THE ONE NOW WHO DOESN'T MAKE A WHOLE LOT OF SENSE VALERIE YOU STUPID GOTHIC HALFLING IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY POSTS THEN STAY THE HELL OFF THEM. I KNOW - PRETEND MY POSTS ARE A PENIS YOU CARPET GOBBLING OOMPA LOOMPA.

Submitted by lungfish at 2009-07-07 00:03:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'd like to think you exist, because you seem nice, but I'm adopting a new philosophy. Michael Savage, who doesn't exist either, has put me over the edge with his illogical babble. I'm afraid you don't really exist outside of my mind, Ducky. But thanks for being there, at least. It's comforting.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 19:34:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2009-07-06 18:59:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Honestly, Duck- I understood so little of this I thought Danger_Ranger wrote it.

You're always doing stuff. Doing stuff is cool.
______________________________________________________

I'll take that as a compliment - I love D_R's writing.

You think digging holes is cool? Dude if you're ever in BC we can hang out and dig holes. And drink beer, which is mandatory.

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2009-07-06 18:59:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Honestly, Duck- I understood so little of this I thought Danger_Ranger wrote it.

You're always doing stuff. Doing stuff is cool.

Submitted by JoeyG at 2009-07-06 16:59:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-06 21:18:34 BST (#)
Ranking: 2

well if theres a big match (good atmosphere) before that just let me know as that would be good too.

Ive only been to the county ground once and had to sit on some strange backless plastic seats whilst it pissed down :(


------------

LOL @ the losers in Stratton Bank!

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 16:35:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

football fans! now you better reply to my email, so i have something to read tomorrow morning!

Submitted by messmind at 2009-07-06 16:21:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Ducky Bitches

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 16:20:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Who will?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 16:19:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

FG you can come too but they may snap you into a thousand pieces!

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 16:18:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

well if theres a big match (good atmosphere) before that just let me know as that would be good too.

Ive only been to the county ground once and had to sit on some strange backless plastic seats whilst it pissed down :(

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 16:14:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

There the Brits go again. HEY! ENGLISH PLEASE!




hahahahahaha

Submitted by JoeyG at 2009-07-06 16:12:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-06 20:54:25 BST (#)
Ranking: 2


Yes, I would like to visit the county ground! When are you playing the arch enemy?
, as in Rovers?? Wouldnt mind going to that one! Other than that a Saturday match would be best!


--------------

Not until Sat 6th March. But I think that's ample time to make arrangements. I'm booking a season ticket, so I'll be there for every home game. I can even escort you from the train station to the county ground......last time rovers came this way it got.....messy. The Queen's Tap (outside the train station) was ripped to shreds.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 15:54:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2009-07-06 20:46:13 BST (#)
Ranking: 2


EI eats peanut butter for breakfast.
------------
Add in Jam and you may be right!



EI, fancy a trip to Swindon for the new footie season? I can bring sandwiches filled with the hearts of young children. I know they're your favourite.
======================
Yes, I would like to visit the county ground! When are you playing the arch enemy?
, as in Rovers?? Wouldnt mind going to that one! Other than that a Saturday match would be best!

But if you are joking...No, id rather piss on Drogo.

I really would. :)

Submitted by JoeyG at 2009-07-06 15:46:13 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-06 16:56:44 BST (#)
Ranking: 2

Ducky im harmless really, promise

-------------

Lies, all lies.

Did you know that Stephen King based his Crimson King on EI?

EI is Charles Burnside from Black House.

EI is why 9/11 happened.

EI eats peanut butter for breakfast.

And, he once left a curry house without paying the bill.

No, wait..... that was me.

But EI <insert nasty euphomism here>

EI, fancy a trip to Swindon for the new footie season? I can bring sandwiches filled with the hearts of young children. I know they're your favourite.

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2009-07-06 15:20:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Sounds like someone is a bit fragile. You should've bought the mother fucking Awesome Auger from Billy Mayes while he was still alive. Billy led you to believe that you could power thru tough dirt and stubborn soil with the (buy now and we'll double the offer!) powerful drill that is included. Now way!

Guess what! I closed my boner in the car door. Muuurrrp!

Submitted by firefly at 2009-07-06 14:12:31 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by RoadSong at 2009-07-06 13:33:36 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

"I thought it would be a 2 hour job max.

Lolzerz.

6 hours later I marched (stumbled) triumphantly (exhaustedly) across the field and staggered across the highway with Jack in tow, both of us looking like drunken turkeys."
~~~~~~~~~~~
Why do small jobs like digging a few holes turn out so damn tiresome and hard? Perhaps because we use quaint lil shovels instead of cool machines like some others..

*SIGH*

I have not seen one of these burner things like in your photo in Cali for a while. The lumber industry used them at the mill. Since most of the big timber is gone, so is the industry and these burners. I never really knew what they were for till just now.

You made me laugh with your "drunken turkeys". I am a Turkey callin fool and can sound just like one, can call the wild ones to me in the woods when I wish to photograph them.
Ahbelle-ObbelelObbelleObbellle.
Why did I admit doing this-heh-good morning back to you Ducky!

Submitted by scourge at 2009-07-06 12:52:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

heh

i'll sell you my motorcycle, ducks. i'm ready for a new project for a while. i'm thinking 'boat.'

Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2009-07-06 12:00:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2009-07-06 11:20:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No...it's a wood waste burner, known as a teepee burner or wigwam burner in the United States and a beehive burner in Canada.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Actually, we have no such devices here. When we want to burn wood waste, we simply pile it up, pour some gasoline, kerosine, or other highly combustible substance onto the pile, step back 20 paces, and shoot a flaming arrow into it.

The resulting explosions are not only awesome, but contribute to me remaining facial hair free when they singe my stubble off. Result: No shaving for a week!

True, I also lose some of my eyebrows, but I don't really use them anyway.

The above is ENTIRELY true, not only for myself, but the South in general.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 11:56:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I live in England......we ahve ice creams here, so if you can just send the money it would be useful.

Ducky im harmless really, promise!

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 11:39:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

*pat pat*

I would offer to get you an ice cream but you live in Britain or the United States or something.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 11:32:38 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

hey! wheres my pat on the head?

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 11:20:22 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2009-07-06 08:05:07 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2

What is that for exactly?
______________________________________

Burning stuff, like bees, and stuff.

No...it's a wood waste burner, known as a teepee burner or wigwam burner in the United States and a beehive burner in Canada.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 11:17:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-06 06:53:37 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i fear that Ducky has spotted my rather disturbing reason for wanting said photo, anyway she repelled my advances not so long ago. I fear i have shot my load (so to speak)
________________________________________________________________________________________

Disturbing...you said it, not me. I'm sure you're very nice, albeit completely ridiculous.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 11:12:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by SgtHartman (user info) at 2009-07-06 10:53:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-07-06 09:43:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Quackers.
______________

Indeed.

And Platinum_Scarecrow...I'm sorry...I know the title may have been deceiving.

Submitted by PlatinumScarecrow at 2009-07-06 11:05:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Usually not one to break a streak. Great form, but, after all, it's a story about digging a hole.

Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2009-07-06 11:05:07 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

What is that for exactly?

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2009-07-06 10:53:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2009-07-06 09:43:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Quackers.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2009-07-06 10:49:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

*Greenwood. The "d" and "n" are far enough apart that I wonder if that was a typo or a Freudian slip.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2009-07-06 10:43:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I put a cedar deck by the pond at The Coolest Backyard in Greedwood Indiana®. I had to dig a bunch of 12-inch diameter holes 3 ft deep in rocks and clay. Rented a 20HP hydraulic lever driller like this one http://www.littlebeaver.com/prod_towable.php and got them all done in under an hour. Digging holes wearing you down? Get yourself a Little Beaver.

The +2 is onaccounta you ride, or at least want to.

Submitted by JoeyG at 2009-07-06 10:36:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I feel as though I've just walked into an episode of Twin Peaks.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 09:53:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i fear that Ducky has spotted my rather disturbing reason for wanting said photo, anyway she repelled my advances not so long ago. I fear i have shot my load (so to speak)

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 09:49:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Fear not, EI. Undoubtedly Ducky will happen upon a pair of black leather chaps during her riding career. Maybe if you ask sweetly enough, she'll send you a picture.



Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 09:48:18 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

:(

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 09:44:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-07-06 08:37:25 CDT (#)
Ranking: 2

could you post a photo of you in your leathers? I shall then sellotape it together with the photo I have of fg.

if you could do a kissing face, that would be perfect,

===

I shudder to think what goes through your head 99.9% of the day.

The "hot damn" wasn't in response to EI's comment.

It was because there will soon be another gal on two wheels in the world.

Submitted by F.J.Bell at 2009-07-06 09:43:28 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Quackers.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 09:42:51 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Good. Grief.

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 09:37:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Hot damn!

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 09:37:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

could you post a photo of you in your leathers? I shall then sellotape it together with the photo I have of fg.

if you could do a kissing face, that would be perfect,

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-07-06 09:35:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Forensic!! Thank you for asking :)

Motorcycle training is coming slowly...my summer work has been shipping me out to different properties to help out which cuts into lesson time, but mark my words I will be fully licenced by the end of the season.

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2009-07-06 09:31:10 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2009-07-06 09:16:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Hi Ducks! How is the motorcycle training going? Have you taken a class yet? If so, what did you think?

Vroom Vroom!

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-07-06 09:12:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

uh oh we have a mad ducky


Bart: What religion are you?

Homer: You know, the one with all the well-meaning rules that don't
work out in real life, uh, Christianity.

Homerpalooza