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ADD - I Can't Write Fiction for Shit but at Least it's Under 500 Words

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-09-13 09:54:09 EDT
Rating: 1.5 on 19 ratings (19 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

She trudged through the thick forest; the light was beginning to wane and she had lost count of how long she’d been out there – just long enough for the thick gash running along her mouth to stop stinging.

a confused horse

Dirt and sweat had matted her hair to her head. Her hair was always something she used to care about. It had been multiple days since she woke up, broken and battered, laying in that directionless clearing. She’d stumbled through all sorts of terrain, finding at one point a lake that, despite sinking up to her knees in stinking decaying plant matter, she drank the water from. Initially she was afraid to eat anything, but the increasing hunger soon took hold and she found herself madly scrounging for anything she thought might be edible.

lateral veins

Where were the goddamned houses? Not even a cabin? Fucking anything? Come on. Maybe over that crest. Maybe over the next one. What’s with all these fucking crests?

whitening with convenience

As the sun finally set, she curled up at the base of an old pine and closed her eyes. The buzzing started almost instantly. Her eyes shot open only to be stung by the first wave. As she opened her mouth to scream they flew in…her lips, tongue, gums…throat…sudden searing pain ripped through them all.

talkin’ bout my girl

As she lay in the dirt with her airways constricting, veins bulging from her dirty swollen face, she managed a wry smile. She was painfully aware that nobody would be looking for her. In a month she’d be an afterthought - just a heap of bones bleaching in the sun. In three months, a young couple on horseback would discover her animal-picked remains and report them to the local authorities.

concrete angel

Word count: 299


Review This Item




Submitted by monkeyswithguns at 2009-09-16 09:28:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by reginajacks at 2009-09-14 14:58:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

should have eaten the horse

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-09-14 05:38:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

and im a wise fox.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-09-14 05:32:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 0


Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-09-14 05:21:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Oh Ducky , you are such a lightweight.

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-09-14 05:18:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

I've heard that


being british

can cause headaches.

Might just be a rumour though. The only important thing I should be doing right now is sleeping.

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-09-14 05:13:14 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

No not me guv. It's one of those mysterious headaches that just appear out of the blue.

Ducky, why are you online, dont you have important things to do?

Submitted by Ducky at 2009-09-14 05:05:10 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-14 01:55:21 PDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i have a headache.

Self induced?

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-09-14 04:55:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i have a headache.

Submitted by TuTs at 2009-09-14 02:19:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by AshK at 2009-09-13 23:04:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by YourNameHere at 2009-09-13 20:30:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by kaos-king at 2009-09-13 20:14:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by EmissionImpossible at 2009-09-13 17:36:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

i read 'confused horse' and thought i should rate immediatly!

Submitted by willartstorg at 2009-09-13 11:54:01 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by HurtByTheSun at 2009-09-13 10:26:34 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Your title is pleasingly honest.

Submitted by orphelia at 2009-09-13 10:23:58 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Beautifully written, Ducky :)

Submitted by GroundHorse at 2009-09-13 10:16:31 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2009-09-13 09:55:42 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

It's your child versus mine! The winner will be showered with praise,
the loser will be taunted and booed until my throat is sore.

-- Homer Simpson
Lisa on Ice