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Paedos, the whole lot of 'em!

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-11-24 10:37:39 EST
Rating: 0.42 on 60 ratings (60 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

“Dude, I don’t care, did you see that body?”
“Man I would do stuff to little ass”
“You’re a fuckin perv”
"Yeah boy!"

The sounds of this intriguing conversation were making their way down the hall to my office yesterday. I have mentioned before that I somehow have been elected grand judge for my delivery drivers discussions. With, at times, a long ride back to the shop they guys would always have some off beat discussion that would become a dispute then a full on argument. Since I sit at my computer all day I get to settle the debates.

I wasn’t quite ready for this one though.



Driver one entered my office and proceeded to tell me in detail what perversions he would like to unleash on Ms Miley Cyrus. His description that I wont repeat included words like taught, bald and snug. They were echoed by his partner with phrases describing how a quarter would bounce when deflected off the lower rear sector and a mouth that was made for cock.



“Woah,woah WTF is wrong with you idiots?"
I protested
“shes a kid”


I was informed with a rather disturbing level of enthusiasm that she had turned eighteen yesterday, and was perfectly legal. I was also informed that driver two could now spank his monkey without any of the guilt that he most likely didn't feel when he did it previously.

I proceeded to attempt to lecture him about how wrong that was and i was informed by them both that it's OK now.

"Guys, let me get this straight, she was a kid on Monday, but now it's cool?"

"Yeah she's legal now, so everything before is OK"

I wasn't following the logic here and mistakenly pressed them for more evidence to support their idea.

"Dude remember Britney Spears first video? in the school outfit? fuck how hot was that? you know how many dudes cracked one off to that?" but shes all grown and even sluttier now so its cool

I didn't say anything as my mind tried to process what they said. Sadly they continued

"Lindsay Lohan, wow what a slut but man she was fuckin hot in that love bug movie."

"Or Christina Aguilera.." chimed in driver two "on the Mickey Mouse club?...damn!"

"Um..guys..can you take this conversa.."
My protests went ignored as they continued on.

"Naw dude, Christina Ricci, you see them titties?
"I still get a stiffy when I watch Casper"

Not being able to take any more of this slammed my fist on the desk
"Alright you perv fucks get out of my office!"

"Dude lighten up, they are all over 18 what's the issue?"
Driver one decided to make his point by adding,
"I been with my girl since high school right? so If I look back at pictures from when we dated and pull one off are you saying that's wrong?"

Inspired by his coworkers statement, driver two decided to add another twist to this.

"Yeah what about those guys that wank to Marylin Monroe or Anna Nichole Smith? they're dead now but it ain't necrophilia 'cause they were alive when the pics were done, right?"

I dont think I blinked for a long time as I sat absorbing this, finally I attempted to speak.
"It's not necroph..? Wait What? Just go back to work. AND STAY OUT OF THE BATHROOM!"

So what do you think? are they right? are they OK to do whatever now that the object of their perving is of age. or some dude fantasizing over a long dead hottie
Are they wrong, should I be alerting some authority or just keep my office door locked?



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Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-29 06:37:13 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Bulgaria snowboarding Orph...

Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-11-28 22:48:14 EST (#)
Rating: 0


Checking further, the term "Age of Consent" was not what I should have said. I should have said "You could marry at 14 in the State of Utah with parental permission. Currently the age that you can marry in Utah is 15 with parental permission.

Utah is quirky. Plural marriages and all. Polygamy was legal and almost required up to the time Utah wanted to become a state. The Feds said "If you want statehood, get rid of the practice of plural marriage, you heathens." They did. The ones that didn't just hid. Whole towns there are populated by men with several wives and dozens of kids.

I am of the opinion that it is nobody's biz, and that the people who claim to be so outraged are perhaps jealous of polygamist men with all that BOOTY! heh

I was a child bride and a teen widow.
===

dude/dudette/teenage grandma/whatever.. polygamy causes a great imbalance in the number of pussy every man can have access too. in the case of americunt, that means a whole lot of black dudes who spent too much time in prison would end up being a lot more sexually repressed and more likely to start a revolt. bleeding heart liberals are afraid that polygamy would somehow turn detroit into an apartheid which favours nigga brothers.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-11-28 20:14:14 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2010-11-24 08:28:19 PST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2010-11-24 08:13:37 PST (#)
Ranking: 1

The age of consent is not 14 in Utah! You trying to get me in trouble RS?

http://www.ageofconsent.us/
~~~
I am sorry X54 for the mis-information! I got MARRIED in Utah when I was 14, different rules I guess when we were dragging those hand carts across the west......heh
~~~
Checking further, the term "Age of Consent" was not what I should have said. I should have said "You could marry at 14 in the State of Utah with parental permission. Currently the age that you can marry in Utah is 15 with parental permission.

Utah is quirky. Plural marriages and all. Polygamy was legal and almost required up to the time Utah wanted to become a state. The Feds said "If you want statehood, get rid of the practice of plural marriage, you heathens." They did. The ones that didn't just hid. Whole towns there are populated by men with several wives and dozens of kids.

I am of the opinion that it is nobody's biz, and that the people who claim to be so outraged are perhaps jealous of polygamist men with all that BOOTY! heh

I was a child bride and a teen widow.

Submitted by YELLOW-MAN at 2010-11-28 19:19:05 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by HurtByTheSun at 2010-11-27 08:08:58 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Proofread.

Submitted by cheerios at 2010-11-26 23:42:56 EST (#)
Rating: 2

some funny shit in here. honestly i could care less what people spank it to.

Submitted by august_sobriquet at 2010-11-26 21:54:13 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by DeMoNiC at 2010-11-26 00:06:48 EST (#)
Rating: -2

What rock do you live under? 17 year olds are hot. Who gives a fuck how old they are, last I checked peoples' imaginations were their own. If you've never been attracted to a 16-17 year old female, I'm sorry but you're gay.

Submitted by apollo88 at 2010-11-25 20:49:23 EST (#)
Rating: 0

You're stealing by schitck but jeaneneneneennenen as ever gets it right


Submitted by yackspat at 2010-11-25 19:06:26 EST (#)
Rating: 1

personally i think if its just porn then its ok for the most part,
but if an adult guy were fucking around with a pre-18 girl then that is when its weird.
personally.

and as far as age of consent goes, if you ever have to worry about it then youre prolly just too old.
most parents wont actually press charges, just threaten. unless of course the guy is super old or a mega douche or something

Submitted by DaBeast at 2010-11-25 14:58:25 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by asmasta808 (user info) at 2010-11-25 11:28:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

ok. good to know. send me a pic of your wife before you die ,ok spot? or your mom will do too. *FWAPFWAPFWAP*

---

My mom looks like Rush Limbaugh's head on the body of Rosie O'Donnel. Right up your cum-crusted alley. How many pics you want, assmaster?






Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-11-25 11:28:27 EST (#)
Rating: 0

ok. good to know. send me a pic of your wife before you die ,ok spot? or your mom will do too. *FWAPFWAPFWAP*

Submitted by DaBeast at 2010-11-25 10:26:27 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Jeezus H. JailBaiting Christ. Fuckers! If you're wanking to a pic taken of Marilyn Monroe taken before August 4th, 1962, then you're not a necrophiliac, you're a connoisseur. If you're wanking to a pic of Marilyn taken after that date, THEN you're a necrophiliac. What the fuck is wrong with you ppl? A pic of a child is a pic of a child even if that child isn't one anymore the PICTURE SHOWS A CHILD and if you wank to that, I'll happily stomp you into the nearest mudhole. It's what the picture PORTRAYS not the current reality. What's difficult about this, you cock-snuggling ass bandits?


Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-11-25 09:55:37 EST (#)
Rating: 0

*eyeballs Psygns* My daughters have been taught to scream "FIRE! RAPE! FIRE!" at the top of their lungs if anyone lays a finger on 'em and if I hear it (and I will - they can scream to shame a Bean-sidhe with an ululation that carries clearly for miles in every direction), the first fucker in my sights will get a loin fulla lead. I don't give a flying fuck how old the chick is right now. If you're spanking it to pics that were taken of her when she was 15 or below, then you're a fucking perv paedo and I'll have no problems whatsoever with introducing you to the great beyond.

Sickos!
===
so you're ok with the supposed necrophilia? 'cause i'm pretty sure i'll outlive most you beer-guzzling steak-chomping whities, unless that korea attacks and no one bothers to nuke the shite out of them.

Submitted by DaBeast at 2010-11-25 09:34:18 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes (user info) at 2010-11-25 04:04:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

How old are your daughters beast?


If there's grass on the wicket....

----

*eyeballs Psygns* My daughters have been taught to scream "FIRE! RAPE! FIRE!" at the top of their lungs if anyone lays a finger on 'em and if I hear it (and I will - they can scream to shame a Bean-sidhe with an ululation that carries clearly for miles in every direction), the first fucker in my sights will get a loin fulla lead. I don't give a flying fuck how old the chick is right now. If you're spanking it to pics that were taken of her when she was 15 or below, then you're a fucking perv paedo and I'll have no problems whatsoever with introducing you to the great beyond.

Sickos!



Submitted by orphelia at 2010-11-25 07:11:00 EST (#)
Rating: 2

people still say 'flid' in the UK?
how do you know about Blue's Clues, eh, psygns, genning up in hope of scoring some really young totty? :P
where are you going on hol anyway, isn't skeg a bit cold in feb?

Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-11-25 06:40:21 EST (#)
Rating: -2

You're a fucking flid. Can you read? These things are called words which are made of letters. When words are put one after another, they're called sentences. Then to put alot of senteces together is called a paragraph.

Take a break from eating your mum's syphilitic vag and turn on Nick Jr. Blues Clues might be just about your level, but if you feel that its stretching you I'm sure the toddler from down the road can help you.
===

yeah, i read it. writing about getting shitfaced about a bunch of guys talking about legal chixors and calling them paedos is totally mindboggling to me. you could get your frontal lobe checked, and sign up for an anger management class. or you could just go the easy way and slit your wrist like an good emo lagfag should.

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-25 05:49:34 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by asmasta808 (user info) at 2010-11-25 10:03:26 GMT (#)
Ranking: -2

huh? i thought miley cyrus is legal.

-----

You're a fucking flid. Can you read? These things are called words which are made of letters. When words are put one after another, they're called sentences. Then to put alot of senteces together is called a paragraph.

Take a break from eating your mum's syphilitic vag and turn on Nick Jr. Blues Clues might be just about your level, but if you feel that its stretching you I'm sure the toddler from down the road can help you.

Submitted by asmasta808 at 2010-11-25 05:03:26 EST (#)
Rating: -2

huh? i thought miley cyrus is legal.

Submitted by BranDo at 2010-11-25 04:18:36 EST (#)
Rating: 1

The Germans have a wonderful word for your stance: Moralapostel


In the Blessed and Cold
In the Crutch-hungry dark
Was where we flayed our Mark
Oh, We were Gone
Kings of Oblivion
We were so Turned On
In the Mind-Warp Pavilion

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-25 04:04:03 EST (#)
Rating: 2

fan of the writing... ppssssshh!!!

It had sarah M-G and Allyson Hannigan, both HAWT!

Fuck the story lines... they were hawt, i was like 10 or 12 or summat.


----

How old are your daughters beast?


If there's grass on the wicket....

Submitted by TuTs at 2010-11-25 03:19:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

But yes I totally agree with below.

Submitted by DaBeast at 2010-11-25 02:12:59 EST (#)
Rating: -2

If any of you come near my daughters, I'll shoot first, shoot some more, and then I'll ask you what you're doing in my yard.

Sickos.


Submitted by TuTs at 2010-11-24 20:54:21 EST (#)
Rating: 0

I told J I was 19 when we got together, when I was only 18. He was 24. He didn't find out my actual age until he came to my 19th birthday party, he reckoned that he wouldn't have been with me if he knew I was 18. What's the difference? It is just a year. I think it is easier to ask, does she look like a woman or does she look like a child?

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2010-11-24 17:20:03 EST (#)
Rating: 0

When I was 21 and in the military, I happened to visit Singapore. At that time, unbeknownst to me, the 14yo girl who would one day become MLW was living with her family in Singapore at the time. They dined every Wednesday evening at the American Club, and as it happens I also dined at the American Club on the Wednesday evening I was in town. Upon realizing this during a conversation at her parent's house shortly after we got married, MLW's mother commented that it would have been romantic and wonderful if we had seen each other and just known we'd be getting together. I knew what she meant so I smiled and said nothing, but I was thinking, "No, that'd be very very wrong. It'd be quite completely wrong for me, a 21yo Squid with chronic hyperlibido syndrome to be perving on a 14yo girl with braces in a Singapore restaurant. Wrong wrong wrong wrong go-directly-to-jail wrong." I'm glad I didn't see her, or at least remember her from that time. Might have made all that time spent together at college a bit awkward.

Submitted by haikumikoo at 2010-11-24 16:26:14 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Wait...you are asking if men should be attracted to 17 year olds or not?

Uh, yeah. I'm 23 and I am sure I have seen many 17 year olds I wanted to have sex with. To say you've never been physically attracted to, or cannot find a 17 year old physically attractive is retarded. There is not all that much physically different between 17 and 18, or 17 and 22. I seriously doubt you have a magic penis which detects these nuances you apparently think exist.

Or are you asking if it's okay for your coworkers to admit it?

If you're asking if it's cool to talk about a 17 year old like that, then to be honest I don't really give a shit. It makes you a creepy douche to say pretty much anything you've written here so the age thing isn't really what's affecting me.

Let's hope this really was verbatim and the shitty attempts at humor weren't yours.

Submitted by FilthyMonkey at 2010-11-24 14:39:05 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Not gonna comment on this one, my thoughts have already been expressed, more or less.

Well, except, I just want to say that, having a legal (fucking) age of 18 is just stupid, most girls get it well out of the way by then and just makes it dangerous for the caring, responsible, older guys who really wanna bang a school girl .

The +2 is for you putting us onto the at vampire series of TheCaes's - Freakin awesome!!

Thanks Fallen!

Submitted by Jack_McCallum at 2010-11-24 14:02:13 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2010-11-24 13:41:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

never saw buffy but non twinkling vampires and hot chicks cant be all that bad, can it?

--

Not to mention some of the best story arcs ever done on TV.

The spin off series Angel was very good as well, again because of the long story arcs, something seen less and less these days thanks to cheaper reality TV and the preference for syndicating shows that can be eaten in single bites, so to speak.

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2010-11-24 13:46:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Lies. Unless mahoganny is some shade of lipstick/nail lacquer, the word would have never made it on to a show like Buffy. My younger sister was a big fan, as were many of her (ovulating) friends.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-11-24 13:41:21 EST (#)
Rating: 0

never saw buffy but non twinkling vampires and hot chicks cant be all that bad, can it?

Submitted by Jack_McCallum at 2010-11-24 13:38:45 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-11-24 13:34:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2010-11-24 13:20:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2


Food for thought here.

I was -AM- a big fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer

--

Yep. As stated, I was a fan because of the writing. Joss Whedon never once misspelled 'mahogany' during the entire run of the show.

(Jesus, point out one fucking typo and icarus goes into stalk mode.)

Submitted by YourNameHere at 2010-11-24 13:37:35 EST (#)
Rating: 0

it was rhetorical, dingus

i was saying jack wasn't a man

you're stupid AND fat?

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2010-11-24 13:34:07 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2010-11-24 13:20:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2


Food for thought here.

I was -AM- a big fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer



Submitted by YourNameHere at 2010-11-24 13:30:07 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-11-24 13:28:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

There were actually men who watched Buffy?



no, what makes you think that?

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2010-11-24 13:28:36 EST (#)
Rating: 2

There were actually men who watched Buffy?

Submitted by icarus1987 at 2010-11-24 13:27:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

No. They are wrong and you should remove them from the gene pool. If they're drivers, just rig the Tomtom to navigate them off a cliff.

Submitted by YourNameHere at 2010-11-24 13:22:41 EST (#)
Rating: 0

i thought this was going to be about bubba's thanksgiving


fag below

Submitted by Jack_McCallum at 2010-11-24 13:20:17 EST (#)
Rating: 2


Food for thought here.

I was -AM- a big fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer (fuck you naysayers, the writing in that show was superior to anything else on TV at the time). Michelle Trachtenberg(sp?) practically grew up on that show, and she was fun to watch, the perfect annoying kid sister.

Fast forward a few years, Eurotrip comes out. I was gonna check it out, it sounded like fun, but then I heard that Trachtenberg did a nude scene in the flick. The thought of seeing that made me really uncomfortable. It just seemed fundamentally wrong. I mean, she's a cute little kid, right? I know she's in her 20s now, but I first saw her as a kid, so...

I still haven't seen Road Trip.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-11-24 12:32:50 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes (user info) at 2010-11-24 08:39:18 PST (#)
Ranking: 2

A few things... YOU GOT MARRIED AT 14?!!?!

Also, (in the UK at least) you can join the armed forces and hence be a trained killer at the ripe age of 16. You can av a shag and bear children legally at 16, and get married and claim benefits.

You cannot, however, buy a beer or cigarettes, nor can you hold a full drivers license.

At the age of 14 however, you are an adult in terms of booking a holiday, but you are a child with regards to holiday insurance.

You cannot own a credit card until 18, but you can fly unaccompanied around the world at 13.

Arbitrary ages are exactly that: arbitrary!!




(it's what's inside that counts - and if Milley has her way, it would be a big cock!)
~~~
Yes I was married off to a much older man at 14 in Utah. I was a widow by 16! His heart could not take the strain...

Submitted by Shlongy at 2010-11-24 12:29:35 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Cheeseburgers

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2010-11-24 12:02:28 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Miley Cyrus's sole purpose in life is to be a sex object. Thought crime doesn't exist (yet), so get over it.

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-24 11:39:18 EST (#)
Rating: 2

A few things... YOU GOT MARRIED AT 14?!!?!

Also, (in the UK at least) you can join the armed forces and hence be a trained killer at the ripe age of 16. You can av a shag and bear children legally at 16, and get married and claim benefits.

You cannot, however, buy a beer or cigarettes, nor can you hold a full drivers license.

At the age of 14 however, you are an adult in terms of booking a holiday, but you are a child with regards to holiday insurance.

You cannot own a credit card until 18, but you can fly unaccompanied around the world at 13.

Arbitrary ages are exactly that: arbitrary!!




(it's what's inside that counts - and if Milley has her way, it would be a big cock!)

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-11-24 11:34:43 EST (#)
Rating: 0

disturbingly Pheely, these guys have GF's and to look at them you would be amazed as to how that happened

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-11-24 11:28:19 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2010-11-24 08:13:37 PST (#)
Ranking: 1

The age of consent is not 14 in Utah! You trying to get me in trouble RS?

http://www.ageofconsent.us/
~~~
I am sorry X54 for the mis-information! I got MARRIED in Utah when I was 14, different rules for that I guess when we were dragging those hand carts across the west......heh

Submitted by orphelia at 2010-11-24 11:26:17 EST (#)
Rating: 2

ps you work with virgins

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-24 11:25:10 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I checked that consent link, I may visit my friend in NC.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2010-11-24 11:19:11 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Modern nutrition and hormone injected foods cause early onset of puberty fairly often these days. Being able to breed =/= being an adult capable of making adult decisions, though, so actually having sex with someone who recently hit puberty is probably messed up and should be avoided. Wanking to some 17yo who has looked 21 for five years is weird but harmless.

Submitted by orphelia at 2010-11-24 11:18:24 EST (#)
Rating: 2

i thought you were just posting the one line
what is all this

*weird and magical hand gesture*

Submitted by X54 at 2010-11-24 11:13:37 EST (#)
Rating: 1

The age of consent is not 14 in Utah! You trying to get me in trouble RS?

http://www.ageofconsent.us/

Submitted by X54 at 2010-11-24 11:12:11 EST (#)
Rating: 1

You seem to have two trains of thought going on simultaneously here:

1. Is it reasonable that on the day before her 18th birthday, a girl is considered a child (and therefore off limits), but the next day, on her 18th birthday, she's considered an adult (and therefore fair game)?

2. Is it wrong to choke your chicken to a picture of a now-adult woman if she was under 18 when the picture was taken?

The answer to both those questions is: move to Oklahoma where the age of consent is 16.

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2010-11-24 11:06:23 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Im probobly playing perverts advocate here, but its our society that considers a person a "kid" when they are below 18.

Your "god" is the one that made them actually adults when they are 14-15.

So who's wrong? Society or jeebus?

Submitted by RoadSong at 2010-11-24 11:02:06 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Considering the "age of consent" is 14 in Utah, the whole issue confuses me.

Reminds me of the 18 year old Marine who wanted to buy beer. "NOT 21! NO BEER".

?

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-11-24 10:56:33 EST (#)
Rating: 0

This is me saying that I don't have feelings, stupid.

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-11-24 10:56:18 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This is me immediately feeling sorry.

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-11-24 10:55:35 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Good idea, that way I'll read through more than the first opening. Also, almost word for word sounds like you doctored, fyi.

p.s. This rating is me being a dick.

Submitted by Dervel at 2010-11-24 10:54:53 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Are you after reassurance?

Submitted by FALLEN at 2010-11-24 10:52:24 EST (#)
Rating: 0

thanks for the feed back sico, but since it was almost word for word, I'll make sure my guys hire a better writer next time.

Submitted by SgtHartman at 2010-11-24 10:49:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Pshhhhhhhaw Miley aint even that hot.....I mean uhhh yeah perverts all of em.

Seriously fallen, where do you draw the line, if you're saying "she was a kid yesterday, but today shes 18 so its cool" is faulty logic then when IS it ok to consider a girl a woman? You know, philosophy of the "pile" and all that. How many minutes, days, weeks, years shoud a man wait after a girl turns 18 to consider her in a sexual way?

Submitted by Psygns_of_the_Tymes at 2010-11-24 10:42:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Errrr, maybe I'm not the best person to give you the answers you desire....

Just shout if you want me to though, I'm happy to regail you with tales of fun and adventure in the under 21's club!

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2010-11-24 10:42:26 EST (#)
Rating: -1

Opening dialogue was terrible. And no this rating isn't just to be a dick but truthfully that was awful.


Bart: You know, Grampa kinda smells like that trunk in the garage
where the bottom's all wet.

Lisa: Nuh-uh, he smells more like a photo lab.

Homer: Stop it, both of you! Grampa smells like a regular old man,
which is more like a hallway in a hospital.

Old Money