The BOSH Man! HAS A CONVERSATION WITH TKWKE, DISCUSSES THE FUTURE OF UBERSITE, and DOESN'T ATTRIBUTE QUOTES, DOESN'T RESOLVE HIS CONVERSATION!!Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2012-04-18 15:52:35 EDT
Rating: 1.6 on 10 ratings (16 reviews) (Review this item) (V)
"How can you know that?"
"Right, well anyway its not like I'm upset, it's just that i'm really bored. Scruggs was pretty easy to make fun of/hang out with/throw things at. Also, Ubersite is lacking in material and if fucking Scruggs didn't puss out and die I'd probably have a lot more stories to share-"
"..yea. As I was saying. Scruggs is gone, Victor Wooten and Leo Kotke formed their own band, and Wesley Willis followed. Lincoln Hawk and his faggot son are idiots.. Thunderlips is all right I guess. Hey - Did you hear that Thunderlips organized a bluegrass convention in Scruggs' memory, then once all his family and friends and gues musicians entered the pavillion he locked all the gates and cranked Slayer for 5 hours straight?"
"Do you realize who you're asking?"
"I know, just as I'm sure you do, that Uber needs a spike in membership and daily viewership, and Scruggs being around would really give a boost to my material, because lets face it, Scruggs was pretty much all I had. What other faggots are out there that we can hang out with?"
"Well, that is a great question to ask me, The Kid Who Knows Everything"
"Yea I get it, man, all right? We all get it.. you fucking know everything.. don't worry, it's not getting annoying"
"Ok I won't worry"
"No, Fuck YOU Boshman! You sit around here crying like a faggot, when all you have to do is go live your life! You have logged plenty of posts where Scruggs was not involved. You've ridden mopeds into outerspace and partied with space narcs! You've formed a countless number of smash hit singles! You jam with Molly Hatchet ALL THE TIME! You have your own treasure map-making business! FUCK Earl Scruggs (may he rest in peace, and in farts) You just go and live your life and come back to tell it. And when you think of Scruggs, go take a shit on his ashes. It's what he would have wanted"
"Dude! That was a pretty righteous speech! I only heard half of it because I started jacking off at some point. But yea! You're probably right! You-"
"I'm definitely Right"
"I'm not probably right, I'm definitely right"
"..fuck you i'm gonna go jizz lighter fluid on some librarians"
(The Kid who Knows Everything lights up a cigarette and nods in agreement)
"That'll do, Boshman"