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What Would You Take With You To A Desert Island?

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-05-15 18:14:00 EDT
Rating: 0.37 on 16 ratings (46 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

I'm sure we're all familiar with the old 'you're stuck on a desert island, what do you bring with you' question. Well, I had it posed to me the other day, but with a slight twist. After all the quibbles were shaken out, here's how the questions runs: You can take the following things with you onto a desert island:

-8 CDs
-1 book
-1 religious text or philosophical work of your choice
-1 DVD
-1 luxury, which can't help you escape or hold more music or books.

After a bit of thought, I've figured out what I would take. I would bring with me the following:

The 8 CD's I would bring would be

'The Best of the Grand Ol' Opry', 'Death Magnetic' by Metallica, 'Appetite For Destruction' by Guns 'N Roses, 'Greatest Hits' by Stevie Ray Vaughn, 'Complete Recordings' Robert Johnson, 'Dr. Feelgood' by Motley Crue, 'God and Guns' by Lynyrd Skynyrd, 'The Ultimate Waylon Jennings.'

The book would be 'The Complete Collected Works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle' It's everything he ever wrote, to the tune of about 1,450 pages.

The religious or philosophical book would be The Bible.

The one DVD would be 'The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.'

The luxury would be a La-Z Boy recliner.

What would you bring?


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Submitted by JonnyX at 2015-07-23 19:38:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'll just take you, then.

Submitted by Dru M at 2015-07-23 13:02:12 EDT (#)

If by hookers you mean 'little boys to fuck' the answer is zero.

----

Submitted by JonnyX at 2015-07-23 13:00:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

how many hookers can i have?

Submitted by JonnyX at 2015-07-23 13:00:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

how many hookers can i have?

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-21 11:10:08 EDT (#)

Snark's actual religious text would be a copy of "Dianetics" and his luxury item of choice would be an E-meter.

Submitted by Silent Renegade at 2012-05-19 21:28:32 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

It didn't say you could bring a CD or DVD Player or that you would magically have a generator for electricity on this island. I would trade in all of that crap for a few survival manuals.

Submitted by DaBeast at 2012-05-18 00:06:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 0


-8 CDs
Audiobooks: "Cosmos" & "Life In The Universe" & "The Dragons of Eden" & "Broca's Brain" by Carl Sagan
Music CDs: 3 CD mixes with Mozart & Beethoven & The Bee-Gees & Elvis Presley & Journey & Eminem + "Chicago 17"

-1 book
"The Great Book of Amber" by Roger Zelazny

-1 religious text or philosophical work of your choice
"The Philosophy of Science" by Richard Boyd, Phillip Gasper, J.D. Trout

-1 DVD
The complete run of "Cosmos" with Carl Sagan

-1 luxury, which can't help you escape or hold more music or books.
United Cutlery's Bushmaster Survival Knife

A DVD/Mp3 player is assumed... else we're stuck with a shitload of reflective discs that can otherwise be affixed to tree trunks with strips of bark to signal passing ships... so... still useful. Unless it rains... which, in tropical climes, it does on a daily basis...

Of course, whomever posited the question to you is a complete and total idiot. So, you're humoring them. How sweet. Remember to wipe their chin after they're done sucking you off in payment for posting such banality because I doubt they have enough brain cell left to do so for themselves.


Submitted by Snark at 2012-05-17 20:32:51 EDT (#)



CDs:
Tool - Aenima
Clutch - Blast Tyrant
16 Volt - Letdowncrush
Deftones - Diamond Eyes
The Black Keys - Brothers
The White Stripes - Icky Thump
Mindless Self Indulgence - If
Trent Reznor and Peter Murphy - The Radio Sessions

Book:
The Complete Kerouac

Philosophical work:
The Bible - It's typically really really thick and the type of paper used works as toilet\rolling paper.

DVD:
Family Guy - All Seasons

Luxury:
An alcohol still of some type.

Submitted by Poots at 2012-05-17 19:59:42 EDT (#)

Yeah, Shlong, think about...wait.....wth?

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 14:53:17 EDT (#)

Yeah, and by then, I'll be in a different industry :)

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-05-17 14:25:15 EDT (#)

We don't need "wide-reaching", though I agree with the sentiment on nuclear. The only thing Edison got right in his all-out theft (okay, okay, patent trolling) of electricity innovations was localized power generation. There is ZERO need to generate power from a distant source. Massive, multi-megawatt power facilities are mostly unnecessary. Thousands upon thousands of miles of transmission lines needn't be strung and maintained. There don't need to be ANY 765kv towers anywhere.

You are right, though. Most energy companies aren't worried. For now. When people start going off the grid by the tens of thousands, when entire communities are telling them to pack it up and get out, I'll bet they worry like hell then. Like most companies that get too big for their britches, they won't notice until the seams bust out and they're left naked and vulnerable.

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 14:12:26 EDT (#)

Oh and Silvr...PS...what ratepayers pay for is the cost of a service and part of that service includes recovering the cost of constructing the plants that generate that service. You wanting to get full recovery of your investment isn't much different than a power company looking for the same thing.

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 14:10:55 EDT (#)

Silvr...most energy companies aren't too worried about people going off the grid.

A) they're jumping on the alternative energy bandwagon themselves and B) in all honesty solar doesn't really do that well on the east coast on a widespread basis. Go out to Cali & it's a different story, but it's really not that big of a generator as it's not reliable out here.

Although it's more precarious and arguably poses a bigger environmental threat if not stored properly, nuclear is a better, wider-reaching source of reliable energy.


Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 14:02:16 EDT (#)

FFS - I'm sure a lot of it had to do with the SCC and FERC (Federal Energy Regulatory Commission) who are on the side of the ratepayers.

FERC/SCC probably told the companies how to reimburse if they were purchasing power from customers (one kwh for one kwh), and the power companies had to make a case on why they shouldn't be reimbursing in that way.

It's all a relatively new concept and regulatory bodies are extremely strict and extremely slow on the uptake...rate cases take forever.


Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-05-17 13:53:56 EDT (#)

We really don't care anymore, sage. All we wanted was to recuperate the money we invested and we have. The maintenance costs are minimal (under $500/year), so as long as AEP covers the costs, we're good with it. Even if they don't, we're still looking at less than $50/month for fully reliable electricity. We've buried all lines on the property and our grid is fully independent. If AEP's lines go down, we only lose transmission capability, not our own power.

What really inspired the comment was people buying into the propaganda that it can't be done. I'm doing it. If anyone has a year-round creek/river on their property, I can set up a system that generates 20kw+ continuously without any dams. I can set up a helix-vaned windmill to generate 20kw+ in as little as 10mph windspeeds as well. Most solar now is able to be daisy-chained, so you're only limited by the amount of area you have (and the money in your accounts, of course).

And if my proof-of-concept continues to work (44 days continuous uptime and counting), your industry is in deep, deep trouble and in danger of extinction. There's no patent for them to classify, so I can't be silenced. [Over 4000 energy patents have been deemed classified. Even the inventors are prevented from talking about them under threat of 20 years imprisonment.] There's no marketing strategy they can fight and subvert. [That started back in the Edison vs. Tesla days] I'm not looking to get rich so I can't be bought out. That doesn't mean they won't try to "suicide" me, of course, as they have others. I've faced death twice and owe it no fear, so that won't work, either. At the risk of a delusion of grandeur, I hope my device starts the revolution that brings the whole fucking corrupt, diseased industry down on their heads. No offense, of course.

Submitted by Yes at 2012-05-17 12:56:59 EDT (#)

"I'm in the industry. Let me tell you this, AEP/Dominion and other electric power providers have been paying too much to those that have solar power and sell it to them, and are looking for a way to recover the over-payments."

---
Surely this is not a problem for every energy company. My power bill is split up between generation/transmission, so I can't see how such a huge oversight could be made here.

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 12:27:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Dang you, Silvr...I wanted to take a Tool album but then decided if I wanted to get all angsty/emo I could just listen to Nirvana or Radiohead. But those are my fave 2 Tool albums.

Regarding...

"In the meantime, if you feel the need to, pretend that solar power isn't the pie-in-the-sky hippy pipe dream that it actually is..."

I know I'm biting a clearly baited hook here but, really? 15kw/solar with 10kw/hydro producing 225% of my farm's electrical needs is a pipe dream? Those $200+ checks my parents get from AEP each month sure cash like they're real. Granted, not paying anything for electricity DOES seem too good to be true. The whole system has been up for less than three years now and we've already paid for everything. It's pure ROI from here on out.

**************

I'm in the industry. Let me tell you this, AEP/Dominion and other electric power providers have been paying too much to those that have solar power and sell it to them, and are looking for a way to recover the over-payments.

Basically, the power companies have been paying for the generation and transmission on a per-kwh rate basis. So in other words, your solar power generates 1 kwh too much & sells it to Dom or AEP, we pay you 1 kwh, or give you a credit for it.

The rate is based on the generation AND transmission. And in reality, all you're doing is generating it. Dom/AEP are transmitting it. So, you're getting too much $. Therefore, Dom/AEP is going to get it back somehow. I promise, it's being approved by the SCC now.

Trust me, like I said, I'm in the industry.

You'll still get your refunds/credits, but they're not going to be nearly as substantial.

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-05-17 10:32:31 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

"In the meantime, if you feel the need to, pretend that solar power isn't the pie-in-the-sky hippy pipe dream that it actually is..."

I know I'm biting a clearly baited hook here but, really? 15kw/solar with 10kw/hydro producing 225% of my farm's electrical needs is a pipe dream? Those $200+ checks my parents get from AEP each month sure cash like they're real. Granted, not paying anything for electricity DOES seem too good to be true. The whole system has been up for less than three years now and we've already paid for everything. It's pure ROI from here on out.

CDs:
Tool - Aenima
Tool - Lateralus
Bob Marley - Legend
Guns-n-Roses - Appetite for Destruction
Violent Femmes - The Very Best of...
Bloodhound Gang - Hooray for Boobies
The Highwaymen - 1
Metallica - self-titled (The Black Album)

Book:
SAS Survival Handbook: How to Survive in the Wild, in Any Climate, on Land or at Sea by John Wiseman

Philosophical work:
The Art of War - Sun Tzu - (what can I say? War is my philosophy.)

DVD:
Man vs. Wild - Season 1

Luxury:
Cannabis seeds

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 10:23:20 EDT (#)

Yeah, her arms are fucking ridiculously scary and manly looking. Crazy. Remind me to never do whatever it is the fuck she does for workouts.

Anyway Immaculate Collection is mostly her old stuff...which is classic and very girly. Maybe I should just make a mixtape of her & Britney...

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-05-17 10:18:07 EDT (#)


Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-17 10:06:45 EDT (#)

Submitted by sage is fancy at 2012-05-16 14:28:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Ok.

CDs:
Nirvana - Heart Shaped Box
STP - Tiny Music: Songs from the Vatican Gift Shop
Radiohead - Hail to the Thief
Biggie - Life After Death
Def Leppard - Mirror Ball
Bob Marley - Hits
Michael Jackson - Number Ones
Outkast - Stankonia

*********************

After thinking about it, I'm gonna have to switch out "Michael Jackson Number Ones" for Madonna's Immaculate Collection. I can't be listening to all dudes, all the time. I'll feel manly enough having to kill and prep my own food...I'm gonna want to dance around and feel girly some of the time.

Submitted by Dervel at 2012-05-17 06:43:45 EDT (#)

CD’s:
Smashing Pumpkins – Melancholy & The Infinite Sadness
Sonic Youth – Dirty
Silversun Pickups – Carnavas
Pearl Jam – Vs.
Nirvana – Incesticide
Gogol Bordello - Underdog World Strike
The Vines - Winning Days
The Wildhearts – Fishing For Luckies

Book:
Franny & Zooey

Religious Text / Philisophical Work:
Descartes – Meditations On First Philosophy. And only because it’s short.

DVD:
The Big Lebowski

Luxury:
Heather Graham

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-05-16 20:29:47 EDT (#)

Submitted by Shlongy at 2012-05-16 19:23:44 EDT:Your mom
*******************************

"Your mom" has already been done, and been done better. You got out-done by a guy who calls himself 'Poots'. Think about that.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2012-05-16 19:23:44 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Your mom

Submitted by AJ at 2012-05-16 19:22:43 EDT (#)

CDs:

The Walkmen - Bows + Arrows
My Morning Jacket - It Still Moves
Buzzcocks - Singles Going Steady
LCD Soundsystem - This is Happening
The Who - Who's Next
The Growlers - Are You In or Out?
Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin IV
Queens of the Stone Age - Songs for the Deaf

The book -
The Dark Tower series

The religious/philosophical book -
"God is Not Great - How Religion Poisons Everything" by Hitchens

The one DVD -
The Prestige

The luxury -
Outdoor kitchen

Submitted by Sage at 2012-05-16 14:28:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Ok.

CDs:
Nirvana - Heart Shaped Box
STP - Tiny Music: Songs from the Vatican Gift Shop
Radiohead - Hail to the Thief
Biggie - Life After Death
Def Leppard - Mirror Ball
Bob Marley - Hits
Michael Jackson - Number Ones
Outkast - Stankonia

Religious text: Bible

Book: either The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas or The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer

DVD: "Friends" box set

Luxury item: small survival kit containing airplane bottles of captain Morgan, a toothbrush, sunscreen, soap, a Swiss army knife, and matches.

I'm in a really fucking boring CPE class so this post saved me. Thanks.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 13:27:42 EDT (#)

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-05-16 08:28:05 PDT (#)

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 10:29:11 EDT (#)
...
~~~
A HOMEMADE BICYCLE POWERED DYNAMO!!! I have always wanted one!
-----
I shall see about posting plans and a parts list. A bit of time will be required.
~~~~
yipyip

Submitted by TigerLilly at 2012-05-16 12:45:14 EDT (#)

Submitted by Caulaincourt at 2012-05-16 10:56:31 EDT (#)

stfu tigerlilly

------------------

Hahahahaha


Submitted by FATMANTPK at 2012-05-16 11:40:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

-8 CDs: Nirvana "Nevermind" and "Unplugged in New York", Jimmies Chicken Shack "Pushing the salmonella Envelope", Pearl Jam "Ten", Johnny Cash "Live at Folsom Prison" and "The Legend of Johnny Cash", "Freedom Rock, Disc 1" and a CD i compile myself (Of MP3's if the player is compatible).

-1 book: "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu

-1 religious text or philosophical work of your choice: The Bible

-1 DVD: Blazing Saddles

-1 luxury: solar powered hot water heater with shower head/hose....for showering and hand washing clothes

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-05-16 11:28:05 EDT (#)

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 10:29:11 EDT (#)
...
~~~
A HOMEMADE BICYCLE POWERED DYNAMO!!! I have always wanted one!
-----
I shall see about posting plans and a parts list. A bit of time will be required.

Submitted by Yes at 2012-05-16 11:10:08 EDT (#)

Of course, I'd likely substitute some survival guides and useful stuff if it were for real and I had these ridiculous restrictions.

Submitted by Yes at 2012-05-16 11:08:35 EDT (#)

8 cds- whatever I dunno. Some books on cd and some music compilations. Toots and the Maytals...Doc Watson...Complete works of Aristotle and similar. You get the picture.
1 book- yeah- collected works of someone to get around the restriction in the same way you did. Something like, but not actually, Collected works of Mark Twain with supplementary materials. (2,573 pages)
Religion/Philosophy- not sure. Maybe something by Bertrand Russell. A History of Western Philosophy?
1 Dvd- whatever who gives a shit.
1 luxury- 1 pimped out outdoor kitchen

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 11:02:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

-8 CDs - All volumes of the Harley Davidson Road Songs - Complete sets Mother Earth News and Survival Home Companion.

Anphetamine-Well Oiled Sisters - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vPvzRL1CK0&feature=relmfu

-1 book - On Writing by Stephen King
-1 religious text or philosophical work of your choice - The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
-1 DVD Second Hand Lion
-1 luxury, A Solar heated hot tub full of rum

Submitted by Caulaincourt at 2012-05-16 10:56:31 EDT (#)

stfu tigerlilly

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-05-16 10:39:18 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

ok I'll play

-8 CDs honestly my music tastes are for shit to the point I'd not even listen

-1 book "how to build a radio transmitter out of coconuts, vines and 8 unused cd's" by Professor Roy Hinkley

-1 religious text or philosophical work Hmm random ancient tomes with teleportation spells hi-lighted

-1 DVD box set of "LOST"

-1 luxury, Orphelia


Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 10:29:11 EDT (#)

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-05-16 04:28:26 PDT (#)

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 02:27:05 EDT (#)

Taking this to the island could lessen the need for CDs?

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Kaito-KA600-Dynamo-Solar-Powered-Weather-Radio-With-All-The-Dream-Features-/200749324922?pt=US_Portable_AM_FM_Radios&hash=item2ebd979a7a

ps
I heard Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil..
-----
I have a similar radio in the Hurricane Bin. Also have a small homemade bicycle-powered dynamo to charge batteries and run LED lights. Might be useful if the 16kW LP powered generator in the back yard fails.
~~~
A HOMEMADE BICYCLE POWERED DYNAMO!!! I have always wanted one!

Submitted by TigerLilly at 2012-05-16 10:25:23 EDT (#)

That's all well and great but how the hell are you going to listen to music or watch a DVD without some CD/DVD Player.

Submitted by John Pike at 2012-05-16 09:21:02 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-05-16 08:56:17 EDT (#)

In the meantime, if you feel the need to, pretend that solar power isn't the pie-in-the-sky hippy pipe dream that it actually is and that the CD/DVD players and such are solar powered.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I assume the dvd player has a built in screen or there is a solar powered TV somewhere. Also did this A/V equipment wash ashore with me or was it here already.
if it was here, I'd go look and see if they had a boat tied off somewhere.

If not I'm envisioning all this stuff made from coconuts and vines and palm trees like on Gilligan's Island.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-05-16 07:28:26 EDT (#)

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 02:27:05 EDT (#)

Taking this to the island could lessen the need for CDs?

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Kaito-KA600-Dynamo-Solar-Powered-Weather-Radio-With-All-The-Dream-Features-/200749324922?pt=US_Portable_AM_FM_Radios&hash=item2ebd979a7a

ps
I heard Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil..
-----
I have a similar radio in the Hurricane Bin. Also have a small homemade bicycle-powered dynamo to charge batteries and run LED lights. Might be useful if the 16kW LP powered generator in the back yard fails.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-16 02:27:05 EDT (#)

Taking this to the island could lessen the need for CDs?

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Kaito-KA600-Dynamo-Solar-Powered-Weather-Radio-With-All-The-Dream-Features-/200749324922?pt=US_Portable_AM_FM_Radios&hash=item2ebd979a7a

ps
I heard Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil..

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-05-16 01:10:12 EDT (#)

Submitted by Wildman at 2012-05-15 23:16:57 CDT: Ok, I'll give you that, but I miss-read it but/becuse: Where do the players(for the DVD's/CD's) come from and where are the batteries or electricity? Uh, Maybe shake it out a little more? Or define a little more background of: WHAT'S ALREADY ON THE ISLAND!!!
**********************************************

I think you might be over-thinking this a bit. I took a cue from American television and ripped this off wholesale from the BBC, specifically the Desert Island Discs program. If you have a problem with the format, I'd take it up with them.

In the meantime, if you feel the need to, pretend that solar power isn't the pie-in-the-sky hippy pipe dream that it actually is and that the CD/DVD players and such are solar powered.

Submitted by Poots at 2012-05-15 21:23:53 EDT (#)
Rating: -1

A recliner could hold more books and music and be used to help you get off the island via catapultation.

I'm assuming it's a run of the mill island where a t.v., dvd and c.d. player are apart of the standard package but you gotta pay a little extra if you want the stove, microwave, and bathroom amenities?

If so I would bring the tastiest yet most pliable of all of the options listed.

Luxury would be your momma whom, if she's still alive, I'd eat. Not out. Regular ole chewy mastication and then I'd micturate her out on top of herself then eat the mixture of poo and pee and your mom. I'd start with her boobies that's for sure. After that I don't know but the boobs would be the first part et. I'd, of course, then use her as chum.

I'm changing my mind about eating your mom. I really wouldn't eat her. We'd just chat and hang out with our tasty dvds and talk about the world and how we had it made and how it was a darn shame that other people had to hustle all day for scraps just so they could die broke and, for the most part, unhappy. Then she'd retire to her side of the island where rabid monkeys would slaughter her in her sleep.


You shouldn't sleep close to the monkeys like I told her over and over. But she's stubborn and wouldn't listen to my pleas.
I might as well have eaten her.

I probably would have if the food was scarce and she caught a fever. Or if a poisonous snake bit her. But god damn, monkeys are waste not want not types. Especially the rabid kind and if they weren't the friggin crabs would polish her bones.

You need to have a word with her.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-05-15 20:32:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2






Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-05-15 20:09:27 EDT (#)

I have a sneaky suspicion that some of y'all aren't quite grasping the concept as laid out.

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-05-15 19:01:28 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Well, I've thought about it too and I've decided that I'd bring:

CDs - doesn't matter as long as they're shiny so I can use them to signal a plane to get me the hell off the island.
Book - "How to get the hell off a desert island", author unknown
Religious text - something big and sturdy, so I can make sails out of the pages for the raft I'll build to get me the hell off the island.
DVD - see CDs used to get me the hell off the island.
Luxury - matches so I can keep warm, and if I accidentally set the island on fire and it summons help to get me the hell off said island then so be it.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2012-05-15 18:48:24 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Glad I wouldn't be on that island with you. The music choices alone would make me commit suicide by bunga-bunga.


Twenty of the suckiest minutes of my life.

-- Homer Simpson
Burns, Baby Burns