login / register
There was a dumb bitch in El Paso
Welcome to Ubersite!

check out my awesome baby

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-18 16:41:17 EDT
Rating: 1.57 on 44 ratings (95 reviews) (Review this item) (V)



DSC02318.JPG
DSC02318.JPG


Review This Item

Rating:

Comment:




Reviews


Submitted by Perk "Grownman Perkiness" man at 2013-07-01 16:45:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

He's creepy...staring at me... stop... but his eyes intrigue me... as if I'm looking into the abyss of society... I will do whatever you ask psychic baby..

What? Shlongy is completely in love with Oathmeal... and he poisons Sage's tea... to stop the love and birth of the first Ubersite child of worth?

Damn you... Shlongy.. will your Tyranny ever end?

(Suits up with Shield, sword, and Bart's Magical glasses)...

On the journey finds a piece of paper.(Looks over a piece of paper (-2Die is written)...)

"The calling card of a madman... I'm coming for thy love, and I must protect Sage.. and Oathmeal's love... for the Knights of the round Keyboard..."

As the warrior trudges on, to fight eight stages.. that he may not return from.. all for what they asked?

For the glory of Ubersite.. fight on'... fight on'...

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2013-07-01 07:36:29 EDT (#)

Aw, thanks. He's actually much cuter now that he's got hair and eyelashes.

Submitted by VelvetElvis at 2013-06-30 22:15:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Now that's a face. Most babies look like Winston Chruchill, but you've got a winner.

Submitted by Habeeb Thomas PhD at 2013-06-30 17:02:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

aww

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2013-06-30 13:38:52 EDT (#)

Sniffs her own dirty underwear while moaning with pleasure, below

Submitted by lisa at 2013-05-30 11:30:58 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Submitted by HellRazer at 2012-09-18 22:31:58 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

HOLY SHIT!! This is the most awesome kid I've ever seen! Perhaps one day he will hunt down your Ubersite enemies and slay them with extreme prejudice.

Submitted by drew at 2012-09-01 18:19:54 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

From ajanssen in TX. Hope he starts for Clemson. Congradulations.

Submitted by Unabonger at 2012-09-01 16:51:53 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

what the hell man ,if they comin at you...

Submitted by kai070169 at 2012-09-01 08:57:31 EDT (#)


Submitted by kai070169 at 2012-09-01 08:24:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Put a shirt on that poor kid.

Submitted by WiKi at 2012-08-08 09:11:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by apollo88 at 2012-08-01 11:14:51 EDT (#)

Submitted by JonnyX at 2012-07-31 15:15:26 CDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Doodles at 2012-07-18 20:26:34 PDT (#)

Remember when we made fun of ugly babies, and got Bart in trouble?

I do.
------
Those were awesome times.


Good times. That site didn't know what hit it. A -2'nami of filth and hilarity.

The best ever bart post though was when the secret service knocked on his door. 'Do you know a shitfuck, sir?'

**********

Sweet Jesus, you guys are making me a bit nostalgic.

I wonder what ever happened to shitfuck..and Method..and all those other people.

Glad to see some of you are still around, though.

**********

Jeanneee, precious baby. I remember when I posted a picture of my baby and got the "Auto -2 No Content" and (because the picture was huge) the "I can see molecules". I've got 2 children now. My daughter is 6 and my son is 2. They're Hell on wheels.

Submitted by PrincessToadstool at 2012-08-06 12:47:28 EDT (#)
Rating: -1

old uber would've flamed this post due to no content.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-08-06 10:28:27 EDT (#)

lol

Submitted by joedaddy at 2012-08-06 02:23:34 EDT (#)

i'll be damned, moo-cow got herself a bull, and made a calf!
shows you anything is possible
USDA! USDA! whoops, i mean USA! USA! USA!

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-08-05 21:27:52 EDT (#)

No, he doesn't play football. Not unless you count Madden.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-08-05 20:06:26 EDT (#)

Just some rando from the festival, as far as I can guess.

Kidding. My fiance is his father. (He'd be thrilled to know that you referred to him as a "player".)

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-08-05 15:51:18 EDT (#)

Submitted by joedaddy at 2012-07-31 17:54:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Burning Man is a music and arts festival.

Yeah right. Burning Man is an overpriced, hot, dusty, dirty and drug-soaked event for individuals, I mean hippys, who still think they're walking the streets of Telegraph Ave, or The Haight-Ashbury district., and who refuse to believe the 60's are dead and stink'n. I became ill just flying over the event, wishing I had a jet instead of a prop-plane, but still was very happy I didn't get sucked in to another appearance.
The first few were...ok, but then it morphed into something nasty and un-recognizable.
Perfect! for most of you.
-------------------------
Well in that case - the burner principle of radical inclusion notwithstanding - feel free to stay far away. Harshing other people's fun is your prerogative I guess, but in the grand scheme, it's a waste of your time. The point of the event is to participate and volunteer. You are responsible for your own experience, so I'm sorry if you didn't have a good time at your last burn, but you have only yourself to blame for that.

Drugs are not a prerequisite, incidentally. Not having a stick up your ass, however, is. So obviously it's not for everyone.

Submitted by apollo88 at 2012-08-01 11:14:51 EDT (#)

Submitted by JonnyX at 2012-07-31 15:15:26 CDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Doodles at 2012-07-18 20:26:34 PDT (#)

Remember when we made fun of ugly babies, and got Bart in trouble?

I do.
------
Those were awesome times.


Good times. That site didn't know what hit it. A -2'nami of filth and hilarity.

The best ever bart post though was when the secret service knocked on his door. 'Do you know a shitfuck, sir?'


Submitted by joedaddy at 2012-07-31 17:54:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Burning Man is a music and arts festival.

Yeah right. Burning Man is an overpriced, hot, dusty, dirty and drug-soaked event for individuals, I mean hippys, who still think they're walking the streets of Telegraph Ave, or The Haight-Ashbury district., and who refuse to believe the 60's are dead and stink'n. I became ill just flying over the event, wishing I had a jet instead of a prop-plane, but still was very happy I didn't get sucked in to another appearance.
The first few were...ok, but then it morphed into something nasty and un-recognizable.
Perfect! for most of you.

Submitted by JonnyX at 2012-07-31 16:15:26 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Doodles at 2012-07-18 20:26:34 PDT (#)

Remember when we made fun of ugly babies, and got Bart in trouble?

I do.
------
Those were awesome times.

Submitted by Sage at 2012-07-26 15:06:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Your baby is the kicker of all ass.

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-24 17:10:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Yeah, I could see how one might walk out of something like that pregnant.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-24 14:07:01 EDT (#)

Burning Man is a music and arts festival held annually in the Black Rock Desert outside of Gerlach, NV. Around 50,000 participants congregate in the desert (or "playa" as it is known by the community) and build a temporary city called Black Rock City. The party lasts about 10 days and centers around massive art projects (including some that are mobile, like a giant lighted pirate ship on wheels), stentorian sound setups blasting various types of electronic dance music, fire, explosives, and general nude and/or costumed merriment.

The Alchemy Festival is one of two Georgia burns. Kind of like a mini Burning Man in the Appalachian foothills, held the first weekend of October.

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-24 07:57:49 EDT (#)

Eh...What did you just say?

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2012-07-23 23:41:46 EDT (#)

Ah....burning man. What I wouldn't have done for an app like Grindr at burning man....

ooh, it's bleeping!

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2012-07-23 22:01:16 EDT (#)

The Danger Mouse is strong with this one.

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-23 16:46:49 EDT (#)

And, of course, when I say "if", I mean "is".

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-23 16:02:50 EDT (#)

Alright, I have to ask, what the hell if burning man?

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-23 15:42:33 EDT (#)

I'm almost certain that he was conceived at last year's Alchemy Festival. No tape exists, to my knowledge.

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-23 15:18:40 EDT (#)

Submitted by Jeanneee at 2012-07-23 14:37:40 EDT (#)


Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2012-07-20 22:43:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Um, I think we all know what this means, and it's that you owe us a sex tape.
-----------------
See, Lishy is always thinking with the heart. Soooo, where is this tape? Make sure it's from the night you copulated or it doesn't count!

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-23 14:37:40 EDT (#)

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2012-07-20 22:43:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Um, I think we all know what this means, and it's that you owe us a sex tape.
-----------------
Ew.

Submitted by CaptainThorns at 2012-07-21 23:54:51 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Marge, there's just too much pressure, what with my job, the kids, traffic
snarls, political strife at home and abroad. But I promise you, the second
all of those things go away, we'll have sex.

-- Homer Simpson
Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy

Submitted by lungfish at 2012-07-20 22:44:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

all babies Buddha babies

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2012-07-20 22:43:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Um, I think we all know what this means, and it's that you owe us a sex tape.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-20 22:04:44 EDT (#)

He'll have to know about Uber eventually because it's where his dad and I met. I do dread that a little.

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2012-07-20 20:04:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Jeanneee is a fucking MOM. AWESOME. Don't let him read uber until he is at least 5.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-20 17:19:54 EDT (#)

You're telling me!

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2012-07-20 17:03:24 EDT (#)

you know, keeping up with your whoring.

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2012-07-20 17:02:32 EDT (#)

this is so confusing

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2012-07-20 17:02:08 EDT (#)

wait.

i thought bret had the baby?

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-20 08:56:07 EDT (#)

Thanks everyone.

FJ, that's pretty sick but I expect no less from you.

And yes. Bret"t" got me pregnant six years ago and I just now had the baby. It was amazing.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-07-20 08:51:36 EDT (#)

I would need that link FJ looked at to see where it became inappropriate.
for science.

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-20 08:37:24 EDT (#)

Submitted by pen_name at 2012-07-20 05:18:25 EDT (#)


Submitted by F.J.Bell at 2012-07-20 04:59:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I wanked over some porn recently where a woman was licking out another woman and spraying milk from her nipples onto her pussy as she licked it. I think she called herself the milkmaid.

Please post some milky boobs.

-------------

Pretty sure this is inappropriate--I just can't decide at which point it becomes so.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I wanked..."

it was all down hill from there.

Submitted by pen_name at 2012-07-20 05:18:25 EDT (#)

Submitted by F.J.Bell at 2012-07-20 04:59:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I wanked over some porn recently where a woman was licking out another woman and spraying milk from her nipples onto her pussy as she licked it. I think she called herself the milkmaid.

Please post some milky boobs.

-------------

Pretty sure this is inappropriate--I just can't decide at which point it becomes so.

Submitted by F.J.Bell at 2012-07-20 04:59:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I wanked over some porn recently where a woman was licking out another woman and spraying milk from her nipples onto her pussy as she licked it. I think she called herself the milkmaid.

Please post some milky boobs.

Submitted by SPECIALk at 2012-07-19 22:58:22 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

that baby does look fairly awesome...well done

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-07-19 20:15:06 EDT (#)

Submitted by apollo88 at 2012-07-19 17:41:14 EDT (#)

is it Brett's?
---------------

lol

Submitted by apollo88 at 2012-07-19 17:41:14 EDT (#)

is it Brett's?


Submitted by Director at 2012-07-19 17:29:18 EDT (#)

You had an elf? Who's the father, Legolas?

Submitted by Sphagnum at 2012-07-19 17:23:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'd hit that!

Congratulations

Submitted by Flack at 2012-07-19 17:04:04 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

He looks like an incredibly adorable alien. Make sure he stays away from uber.

Congrats.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-19 15:44:30 EDT (#)

Nope.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-07-19 15:39:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

If you have another kid, do you think you could get him to quit Uber?

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2012-07-19 15:30:09 EDT (#)

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2012-07-19 08:39:27 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

This is why I quit Facebook.
---------------

Really? I'm honored.

Submitted by Yozz at 2012-07-19 14:55:43 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by Yozz at 2012-07-19 14:53:31 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

So the Visitors got to you too, huh? I imagine birth was like the cab scene in Men in Black.

Cute. Congrats.

Submitted by no1hasdis at 2012-07-19 14:19:13 EDT (#)

Kill it. Kill it with fire.

Submitted by TigerLilly at 2012-07-19 13:41:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Bubs at 2012-07-19 11:51:16 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

are you sure he's mine?


Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2012-07-19 11:50:32 EDT (#)

Fendwelling tractor driving en goitered slapty back!

Submitted by Dervel at 2012-07-19 11:48:05 EDT (#)

The goiter made a fine counterbalance, but the finger-webbing was just a hinderance to be honest.


Submitted by Anglophile at 2012-07-19 11:40:43 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

cute kid. too bad mom's a cunt.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-07-19 11:38:44 EDT (#)

HEY! only I call him Dervs. Thats my name for him.

Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2012-07-19 11:37:39 EDT (#)

I guess all those extra fingers and toes were a help with the Judo eh Dervs?

Submitted by Dervel at 2012-07-19 11:36:35 EDT (#)

No, it's funny.

I was Bucks number 2 in Judo when I was a kid. (Under 45kg). True dat.

Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2012-07-19 11:23:14 EDT (#)

I require acceptance of said children to a university which wasn't a polytechnic/college before I will give respect.

Submitted by orphelia at 2012-07-19 11:19:46 EDT (#)

We don't even qualify for working tax credit so enough of the welfare jokes.

My children are all exceptionally gifted. My eldest dies kick ass art especially comic book, my youngest at three has a reading age of 5 and my middle one excels in dancing.

They each are learning a musical instrument and could totally kick your ass in judo.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-07-19 10:36:58 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

:) Congrats!

Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2012-07-19 10:28:10 EDT (#)

We will judge you Ophelia, on how well your children do in education and life. Average it out and see if you are a Good human being or not. Adding more children wont necessarily improve your chances that much. At your present rate any additional child would have 4.76% weighting on performance.

Submitted by Dervel at 2012-07-19 10:15:55 EDT (#)

Submitted by orphelia at 2012-07-19 14:11:19 BST (#)


also, isn't gas and air bloody fab? you can buy it here i am thinking of getting some

---

Or, if you're a bit of a chav, you can have a never ending conveyor line of burden babies and get it for free!

Submitted by redskieslookfake at 2012-07-19 10:13:02 EDT (#)

You know, the Sony DSC-W55 is capable of much better shots than this. Good lighting is your friend.

Submitted by orphelia at 2012-07-19 09:11:19 EDT (#)

also, isn't gas and air bloody fab? you can buy it here i am thinking of getting some

Submitted by Dervel at 2012-07-19 09:11:13 EDT (#)

Submitted by Doodles at 2012-07-19 04:26:34 BST (#)


Remember when we made fun of ugly babies, and got Bart in trouble?

---

Ahahaha. Those were really harsh too.

I guess this is shenanigans, as why would anyone post a photo of their kid on here?

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-07-19 09:06:45 EDT (#)

no babycakes, I'm somewhat witty once and a while

Submitted by orphelia at 2012-07-19 09:04:35 EDT (#)

i think someone hacked fallens account

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2012-07-19 09:01:47 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

LOL for Fallen...for once in his life.

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-07-19 08:53:07 EDT (#)

he quit facebook because people hated him so much, he stopped getting Farmville requests.
" Jim needs help picking corn, but not from sico, fuck that jerkhole"


cute kid, 'Neee

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2012-07-19 08:39:27 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

This is why I quit Facebook.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2012-07-19 08:14:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

yo baby is bosh

Submitted by Average_Dan at 2012-07-19 08:03:10 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Pretty Awesome baby there!

The .jpg Came out larger than life methinks.

Submitted by orphelia at 2012-07-19 06:12:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Awwwwwww congrats <3

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2012-07-19 00:19:26 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

but nice tits

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2012-07-19 00:18:53 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

why the fuck would you post a picture of your brother's kid on ubershite?

Submitted by Doodles at 2012-07-18 23:26:34 EDT (#)

Remember when we made fun of ugly babies, and got Bart in trouble?

I do.

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-07-18 23:22:48 EDT (#)

If it makes you feel any better, Silvr, I spent a good 45 seconds trying to figure out if that was a real baby, or one of those creepy "life-like" dolls. It could've gone either way really, so I gave up and figured the comments would solve that mystery.

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2012-07-18 21:24:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

What the actual fuck is going on here? Not a single, "Oh God! Kill it! Kill it now!" or "Looks like it would make good base for soup."

This new Uber is a strange and foreign place, indeed.
'Buncha slack-jawed faggots around here.'

Beautiful child. Cherish.
And congratulations.

Submitted by Ducky at 2012-07-18 19:53:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Gorgeous

Submitted by Professional_Peon at 2012-07-18 19:46:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Ima steal ur babies!!!

I'm tryin to grow a cutie farm.

Submitted by FATMANTPK at 2012-07-18 18:53:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Cute!

I have a 2 year old son and a 3 month old daughter. I may grow out my hair just to watch how fast it turns grey.

My son has fulfilled my parents wish, "I hope you have a son just like you". Although he is not fat, he is full of energy, mischievous and lacks any sort of attention span.

Submitted by Wisher at 2012-07-18 18:17:16 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Too cute! Those eyes are wise & soulful. I want one someday. ~~Wishing love & happiness to you both.

Submitted by I'll at 2012-07-18 17:50:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Congratulations, woman! Now raise him right so he doesn't end up as a feature on Americas Most Wanted for crumpling people.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2012-07-18 17:46:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I really wanna yell at you and call you a bunch of names...

Submitted by Danger_Ranger at 2012-07-18 16:49:54 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

A GINJA!

Submitted by Yes at 2012-07-18 16:47:30 EDT (#)

It's creepy how baby's eyes are so big. Also creepy- their pointy giant heads and weird spindly fat bodies.

Yours looks as good as any I've seen though.

congrats


Flanders:
They're not perfect, but the Lord says love they neighbor --

Homer: Shut up, Flanders.

Flanders:
Okely-dokely-do.

Hurricane Neddy