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Makin' Wookie: New Sci-Fi Brothel Opens

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-09-14 12:00:35 EDT
Rating: -0.5 on 2 ratings (7 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

http://www.lvrj.com/news/alien-cathouse-brothel-to-feature-girls-from-another-world-136131043.html

Have you ever dreamed of traveling to distant planets, meeting exotic alien women and having sex with them?

If so, you -- and possibly Captain Kirk -- are the target audience for brothel owner Dennis Hof's newest Southern Nevada business venture.

The reality television star and outspoken sex merchant recently bought a rundown bordello 90 miles northwest of Las Vegas and unveiled plans to renovate and reopen it with a science fiction theme.

He is calling it Alien Cathouse and promising "girls from another world."

Hof has turned to an old friend to plan the costumes and decor: Hollywood Madam turned Pahrump resident Heidi Fleiss.

"She's the chief alien design queen," he said.

Hof purchased the brothel and adjacent gas station, bar and convenience store on U.S. Highway 95 from notorious longtime Nye County brothel owner Maynard "Joe" Richards.

The store is being rebranded as the Area 51 Alien Travel Center and will feature its own line of merchandise emblazoned with little green men and women.

It's all an attempt to cash in on the property's location just south of the federal installation formerly known as the Nevada Test Site -- though nowhere near the actual Area 51.

Hof, whose Moonlite Bunny Ranch east of Carson City is the setting for a long-running HBO reality show, expanded his adult empire into Southern Nevada last year when he bought Richards' two brothel properties in the tiny town of Crystal, north of Pahrump.

With his latest acquisition, Hof now holds five brothel licenses, the most ever by a single owner. He hopes to add one or two more in the near future.

"Unless they're married, I don't want anyone in Nevada having sex unless I get a cut of the money," he said with a laugh.

Only one of Hof's two brothels in Crystal is open for business. The other is still awaiting a face-lift, but that work is on hold until Hof and Fleiss can find a cable network -- possibly Cinemax -- willing to turn the renovation into a reality show.

The Alien Cathouse is expected to open for business in a month or two, after Hof and Fleiss oversee the complete transformation of the old bordello, which he described as a "disgusting, terrible place" without a single window.

All the rooms at the new place will be spacious suites, Hof said.

Nye County officials have issued him a temporary brothel license while he undergoes a routine background check.

"They just did this 14 months ago," Hof said. "The only change is I made $2 million. I can't see the problem there."

Nye County Sheriff Tony DeMeo isn't expecting any complications either.

He said this is the first time the county has issued a temporary license, but it made sense in this case because of Hof's recent background check and his clean operating record.

"He is in a very unique position," DeMeo said of Hof.

Nevada is the only state that allows houses of prostitution. About two dozen licensed brothels operate in seven rural counties. Three other counties allow them but don't have any right now.

Prostitution is illegal in the state's population centers of Clark and Washoe counties.

Hof's alien theme is already well past the probing stage, but important details -- whether the working women will be painted green, for example -- are still being decided.

When Hof talks about the idea, it comes out sounding like a series of bumper-sticker slogans: "Sex from another planet" and "Alien Cathouse girls do it different," to name a few.

He did confirm one thing: There will be alien costumes made for employees at the travel center and the women in the brothel.

It's unclear whether the costumes will be for everyday use or for promotional events and special occasions.

Hof's plans are already getting rave reviews from at least one industry expert.

George Flint is a Reno wedding chapel owner who lobbies on behalf of Nevada's licensed brothels. He thinks a brothel with a space alien theme is a great idea, and he thinks Hof might be just the guy to pull it off at a time when most Nevada brothels are barely scraping by.

Flint used to dislike the self-anointed "pimp-master general" and his headline-grabbing antics, but he has developed a new respect for Hof.

"There are times he still scares my diaper off," Flint said, "but he has a stamina that's hard for me to believe."


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Submitted by Sage at 2012-09-17 13:03:53 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

WTFINRAT.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2012-09-15 08:57:48 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Dennis Hof is a fatass.

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-09-15 01:09:41 EDT (#)

They also have a terrible website: www.aliencathouse.com C'mon, dude, if you're going to bother to put up a website, at least put some effort into it. It's not like you can't afford it.

Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-09-14 18:37:51 EDT (#)


Submitted by RoadSong at 2012-09-14 18:33:37 EDT (#)

My favorite swimming and crawdad hunting hole was by the bridge leading to the Mustang Ranch when Joe Conforte owned it. Some of his girls were friends of mine. Now old Joe has skeedaddled off to Brazil to avoid the tax man.

Alien costumes? Hmm. Better idea, alien body paint!

http://keywestunplugged.com/

I have thought of going into the body painting biz, perhaps I will contact Heidi... :)

Submitted by FALLEN at 2012-09-14 12:32:26 EDT (#)

you just copypastaed the whole article in.

Submitted by Quartermain at 2012-09-14 12:01:27 EDT (#)

I posted this mostly just so I could use the phrase "makin' wookie" because if there is one thing I love, it's a terrible pun.


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Homer: Hiya.

Coyote: There is a lesson you must learn.

Homer: If it's about laying off the insanity peppers, I'm way ahead
of ya.

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