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I wipe standing up

Submitted by pen_name at 2013-02-10 12:10:04 EST
Rating: 1.8 on 11 ratings (13 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

For the most part it works for me. I get good front to back action without worrying about dragging unexposed hand over my soiled ass.

But when I take a morning dump, my back is usually pretty stiff and I have to struggle to get my hand low enough to reach my ass. Imagine Frankenstein trying to wipe in a standing position. Combine trying to shit with morning wood and it makes my morning bathroom activities the most arduous of my day.


Review This Item




Submitted by Girlwithaclue at 2013-02-13 16:34:39 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Napkin fold :)

Submitted by kitchens_closed at 2013-02-13 15:42:01 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Submitted by Flak at 2013-02-13 13:48:25 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Wiper of all ass (+2)

Submitted by Flak at 2013-02-13 13:48:25 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Wiper of all ass (+2)

Submitted by ASO at 2013-02-11 21:02:28 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I havent been on this site in almost a year again, and this is exactly the type of quality post I've been missing.

I usually start with a conveyor belt situation and begin folding it upon itself, until I eventually have a wad.

Because I believe it's better to get that stuff out while I've got the chance (I stay busy) I like to give another good push following the first wipe. IF successful, I'll get another wad going, fold it over, and one more good wipe.

All of my shits follow this pattern.

Submitted by EyeInTheSky at 2013-02-11 13:52:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2013-02-11 12:36:24 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I prefer a two-staged approach: the mit transitioning into the roll.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2013-02-10 18:23:13 EST (#)

Hygiene is important.

Submitted by oldschool at 2013-02-10 15:30:59 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Submitted by rats at 2013-02-10 13:35:05 EST (#)
Rating: 2

The super-wad is for those splashing success's .... like after 24 hotwings the day before.

Submitted by kitchens_closed at 2013-02-10 13:18:54 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Sometimes after a particularly sloppy shit I will squat so my ass is inches from the ground, which allows me to really get up in there. I do this to avoid shitstains in my boxer briefs.

Submitted by pen_name at 2013-02-10 12:22:38 EST (#)

I should have said "Frankenstein's monster." I am full of regret.

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2013-02-10 12:18:31 EST (#)
Rating: 2

skrappy uses the paper or plastic

he not only doesn't unroll

he doesn't even open the four pack

just pushes the whole thing through

when the plumber arrives, he says, "jesus i can't tell if that's paper or plastic"

Submitted by Shlongy at 2013-02-10 12:14:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2


Ummm, I, uh, never...never mind.

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