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GrUeBERfest 2013 contest entry: "Just Right"

Submitted by FALLEN at 2013-10-09 12:54:31 EDT
Rating: 2.0 on 10 ratings (14 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

The rain showed no sign of stopping.

Her feet found every puddle and rut as she ran through the woods. She was unsure of how long she’d been running; her memories of everything eluded her. There was a screaming and blood, then voices, people coming for her.
So she ran.

Her vision was obscured from the rain, her long blonde hair hung across her face making the trek through the forest even more challenging. She paused, leaning against a withered oak tree to wipe her face. Her clothes were muddy, and she was hungry, so very hungry. On her arms were long slices, from her wrist to almost her elbow. The skin flayed back revealing the red sinew below, she poked at the wounds and the skin sloughed off a little more. The where and how of what happened to her were lost. All she knew was that “it” was all wrong and she had to keep running.

She crossed a small creek and followed it on the other side for a ways, coming to a small clearing. Her hunger and exhaustion caught up to her and her lithe form collapsed to one knee. Once again brushing aside her hair she strained her vision and made out the faint outline of a cabin just ahead. Fueled by the possibility of shelter and food she rose and made her way to the front door.

The cabin was in good repair and looked like it was recently used. She twisted the door handle and it strained against the lock. She threw her small frame against the door over and over until she heard a crack, and the door swung open. She slammed the door behind her shutting out the rain. Her right arm hung at an odd angle, no doubt dislocated from the impact. She thought to herself that the pain should be more but like the slices on her arms, she didn’t really feel it. Perhaps it was from the exhaustion or hunger, she didn’t care, she grabbed the right arm with the left and jerked it making a wet pop as it slid back into place.

Her head swam and she wobbled almost falling. She braced herself against the table and grabbed an apple from the bowl. She bit in and devoured it in a few bites followed quickly by a piece of bread. They did little to quiet the hunger and she found herself over come with rage. She grabbed the smallest of the chairs and with one hand, flung it to the far side of the room where it split into pieces as it hit the wall. She reached the refrigerator hoping to find more satisfying food within. She took her fill of the chicken and beef inside, devouring everything she could find.

Her next thought was to rid herself of her wet clothes. She headed up stairs and into the first bedroom she found. There sat a large bed to one side, she rested on the edge for a moment to clear her thoughts. Her memory was still a blur. She touched the slices on her arms once again and still had no idea where she got them. They were large but not deep, she could not see bone, just the wet pink flesh beneath the surface of the peeling skin. To her they looked very much like long scratch marks.

The feeling of something being wrong washed over her again. Her curiosity about her arms was pushed aside as this new feeling flooded into her mind. She left the bed and swung open the closet door. Inside she found an assortment of men’s clothing, all too large for her petite body. Her frustration became anger as she threw shirt after shirt to the floor. As her frustration grew so did the clouds in her head, she staggered as she entered the second bedroom. She tore off her mud soaked clothes and searched the second closet. As in the first, she found things too large for her. She emptied the closet and made her way to the last room.

She fell in the hallway as delirium began to overtake her. She struggled to her feet and searched the last closet. Finding something close to a fit, she dressed herself in a pair of shorts and a long sleeved shirt as she made her way to the bed. She collapsed onto the soft bedding and passed out from exhaustion.


“You got that Low-boy?”

“Fuck you, Josh. I got this.” Charles fired back as he dragged the cooler out from the back of the truck.

“Shit, are you two starting already?”

Bob wasn’t really bothered by the two of them busting balls. Josh, always the smart ass, loved to give his brother shit for being the youngest and smallest of the three. As the oldest, he wound up playing referee between the two of them.

The cabin originally belonged to their grandfather and had now made its way down to them. Technically, Bob as he was the oldest, but the three of them spent most of their free time there. It sat about a mile and a half off of Route 30, still close enough to make a run to get supplies, mostly beer, but nicely tucked away in a pocket of no-where.

The three of them sprinted to the porch to find cover from the rain. Bob and Charles stacked the supplies while Josh keyed the lock. To his surprise the door swung open at his touch.

“What the hell is this? Didn’t you fuckers lock this before we went into town?”

Charles pushed past Josh and set the cooler inside the cabin. “Yes it was locked, don’t know why, it’s not like anyone is coming in here.”

“Guys…hold up. Something’s not right here”

Bob interjected as he looked at the door frame. A section of the wood had been splintered off as if the door was forced open. “Hit the lights.”

Josh flipped the switch and the brothers surveyed the room. A trail of water and mud lead into the room to the table. A handful of partially eaten apples and bread were strewn about. The floor in front of the fridge was littered with chicken bones and empty bowls.

“What do you think? Raccoons?” Bob asked.

“No I don’t think so.” Replied Josh, ‘its too much food gone. Even the steaks that were marinating were eaten.”

Charles held up the remains of the smashed chair from across the room. “I don’t think a Raccoon did this. A bear maybe?”

Finding a muddy foot print leading to the stairs Bob motioned the others to follow him. Josh grabbed the poker from the fire place and the three ascended the stairs.
Entering the first room, the one that belonged to Bob, they found clothing scattered everywhere.

“Still think it’s a bear, short stack?” Josh was obviously stressed and trying to hide it behind his mouth. Charles ignored him.

“Anything missing?” he asked Bob

“No, my shit’s just everywhere, like they were looking for something but nothing is missing.”
Following the mud, they found Josh’s room in the same state.

“What the hell is this?” asked Josh as he held up a muddy dress.

“A dress…”

“I know it’s a fucking dress, you idiot, it isn’t mine”

“Are you sure?” Charles said with a smirk.

Bob half smiled seeing his little brother get the better of Josh for once. He focused back on the task at hand and led them to the last bedroom. Opening the door they notice the smell, faint but there. It was like copper, pennies, or possibly dried blood.
On the bed was a young woman, face down and sleeping. Her blonde hair was a mess, with a bit of dried mud here and there. She was dressed in Charles’s shirt and shorts, which fit her reasonably well.

Loosening his grip on the poker, Josh tussled Charles hair “figures your clothes would fit a chick.”

“Will you cut that shit out!” scolded Bob, “She could be hurt.”

Bob made his way to the bed and noticed her breathing had become labored. His body blocked his brothers view of the girl as he leaned over to check on her.

“Miss? Hey…are you O…”

The girl rolled over suddenly and placed her hands on Bob’s shoulders. His brothers could see she gripped them tightly, her fingers digging into him then sliding down his arms before letting go.
Her voice was raspy and low, all Bob could make out was “Too big.” as her hands shot forward again and clawed at his throat. She leaped from the bed to the far side of the room in one fluid motion. She crouched on the floor with her back to the stunned duo.
Bob fell over to one side, blood spraying everywhere as he landed on the floor between the bed and his brothers. A pool of crimson was rapidly forming around his body.

Josh adjusted the grip on the poker’s handle and charged her.

“I’ll fucking kill you, you cunt!”

She suddenly stood, not fully upright and turned toward him, her face covered by her golden hair and shadow. She lurched at him with an unnatural gait, but so quickly. Josh swung the heavy end, connecting with the side of her head. The girl responded with a slash of her hands across Josh’s midsection spilling his guts off to one side and then swinging back the other way, she tore out his throat.
Josh was very dead long before he hit the floor.

Charles was paralyzed with fear and could only stare at the vision before him. The girl stood and stared back. She removed her blood stained shirt exposing herself to him. Her body was covered in long fissures; tears in her skin that showed the red flesh beneath. Her eyes were solid black and her once pretty mouth was a nightmare of fang. Her hands were little more than claws, and she dug them into herself, peeling of the ragged skin and tossing it to the floor. She moved erratically to Charles but with a speed she should not have.

She wrapped one hand around his neck and pinned him to the wall. She looked Charles up and down and slid the palm of her hand from shoulder to crotch and back again. With one hand she tore off his shirt and gently dug a long fingernail into his neck, above the collar bone. Her mouth curled into a horrible smile as she hissed

“Just right…”
The cabin was filled with screams as she skinned him alive.


Review This Item




Submitted by orphelia at 2013-10-20 16:59:51 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by Poots at 2013-10-13 15:15:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

You've been on the force so long you think you've seen it all, but you haven't. 'Cause life's always got one more surprise for you. And sometimes, it's a big one.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2013-10-11 18:36:09 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by bart made me laugh at 2013-10-11 03:38:46 EDT (#)

i have decided to allow you to win that shit trophy

Submitted by Shlongy at 2013-10-11 00:41:26 EDT (#)


Submitted by RoadSong at 2013-10-10 20:22:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

"The girl responded with a slash of her hands across Josh’s midsection spilling his guts off to one side and then swinging back the other way, she tore out his throat.
Josh was very dead long before he hit the floor."

"Her eyes were solid black and her once pretty mouth was a nightmare of fang."

I like "..nightmare of fang". Great work attaboy.

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2013-10-10 20:22:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by bart made me laugh at 2013-10-10 20:05:57 EDT (#)

massive pussy below

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2013-10-10 19:58:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

It looks like I'm going to have to concede to the venerable FALLEN. I was hoping to get something written this evening, but I still have about six more hours of work to do.

I'm not sure that I could've come up with something better than this anyway. Well done, man. Well done.

Submitted by JonnyX at 2013-10-10 12:59:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

no porridge for you!

Submitted by SilvrWolf at 2013-10-10 01:21:51 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Oh damn. I think I'm gonna lose.

Good stuff, FALLEN.

Submitted by OathMeal at 2013-10-09 13:52:17 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by skrapmetal at 2013-10-09 13:40:39 EDT (#)


Submitted by Anglophile at 2013-10-09 13:19:44 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Good work.

Hey, if you want wild bears eatin' your children and scarin' your
salmon, that's your business. But I'm not gonna take it! Who's with

-- Homer Simpson
Much Apu About Nothing