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Arthritis is the scourge of the reclining classes.
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Because I'm mother fucking OathMeal, that's why.

Submitted by OathMeal at 2015-02-23 12:39:44 EST
Rating: 1.3 on 23 ratings (31 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

Nothing sucks more than sitting through some sob story being poured out by an old, lamenting wash-up whose biggest regret in life is not following his dreams.

I remember reading some article recently that reported on the 'biggest regrets' of dying people. Topping the list was, "I wish I didn't work so much," and "I wish I would have had the courage to pursue my passion", followed by "Not spending more time with my kids," etc.

I bring all this up because today I quit my job to pursue a dream I've always had. And, it's a bit of an unconventional dream: tour the country playing music in public places.

That's right, mother fucker. I'm going to be rolling up into Vegas, Seattle, SF, Memphis, New Orleans and Tampa Bay just to name a few, finding a sweet spot in a park or something and I'm going to play music.

Good music. Not shit. You can shove that Mumford & Sons shit right up your ass.

Bitches are gonna be all like, "WTF?" and I'm gonna be all like, "Dreams, mother fucker. I has them."

Then the cops are going to show up and tell me that I'm violating a city noise ordinance, but that it's ok because what I'm creating is actually really good and I should just be sure to not be too loud.

"Sure thing, officer. Thanks for the heads up."

I'll rake in a few hundred bucks in tips, zip up my case and then plot a route to the next city.

I am not so naive to think that this is a sustainable way to make a living. It hardly is - I know this from doing it on the side for the past 5 years. But what I'm doing will serve a need I have to actually DO something with my talents, something beyond making cold calls and meeting sales quotas.

Sure, I might return to the corporate world someday. But for now, it's me, a few guitars, a healthy savings account and the road.

I refuse to be that old sot vomiting forth regrets.

I'm going to have a great story and the best part of it starts today.

www.bret-dallas.com

Onward!!


support your local musclehead busker.jpg
support your local musclehead busker.jpg


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Submitted by Dru M at 2015-07-23 10:49:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

PLUS TWO!!

Submitted by Shlongy at 2015-03-26 22:19:38 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

If he does, you can bet that he'll want to crash on your couch because he is virtually penniless.

You can just throw the couch out once he leaves.

Submitted by Sage at 2015-03-26 20:48:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

YAAYYY!! That's awesome; I envy you. Make a stop in Richmond. xoxo

Submitted by ThePuzzleNazi at 2015-03-18 00:40:12 EDT (#)


Submitted by Kelly at 2015-03-17 21:48:07 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Just decided to quit my corporate job today...then read this...love the irony...off to grow weed by the volcano!!!

Submitted by S.I. Co. at 2015-03-06 16:55:12 EST (#)

If by some long shot you make it to Texas, let me know. I can put you in touch with a person, a good friend of mine, who makes quality music and can show you how to actually get paid instead of being a vagrant.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r26GrK0O2cY

Submitted by JonnyX at 2015-03-02 10:54:54 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Shlongy at 2015-02-26 15:04:16 PST (#)
Rating: -2

I missed the part in your video regarding subsistence- Do you have room in your backpack for FROZEN DINNER ENTREES?
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I was patiently waiting for that one - well said!

Submitted by Sacrilicious at 2015-03-01 18:56:44 EST (#)

I quit my stable corporate job to do something that I felt mattered. I enjoy the personal fulfillment and lower day to day stress more than I miss the money.

Hope you don't crumple your guitar.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2015-02-26 19:01:56 EST (#)
Rating: -2

Winner!

Submitted by OathMeal at 2015-02-26 18:32:26 EST (#)

Ok Shlongy I will leave that one up.

Submitted by Shlongy at 2015-02-26 18:04:16 EST (#)
Rating: -2

I missed the part in your video regarding subsistence- Do you have room in your backpack for FROZEN DINNER ENTREES?

Submitted by DaBeast at 2015-02-26 16:31:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2


Give a 100 monkeys a typewriter, and this is what they'd come up with by try 46. It ain't Shakespeare but it'll do.

I'm in Georgia. If I see you, I'll hit you with a dead deer.


Submitted by OathMeal at 2015-02-26 12:52:14 EST (#)

Sweet you got a couch I can crash on next Thursday?

Submitted by Hadooken at 2015-02-26 12:37:37 EST (#)

I too am in Colorado. In the Springs.

Submitted by OathMeal at 2015-02-26 08:38:54 EST (#)

FUCK YEA FLACK

Submitted by Flack at 2015-02-26 00:36:42 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I resigned from my job as well to move to Colorado and live in the mountains. My last day is Friday and I leave Detroit on the 9th. Gonna go back to school and play music as well. Perhaps our paths will cross in Denver one day. Good luck!

Submitted by Hadooken at 2015-02-25 12:47:28 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Good luck and dont get stabbed by other wandering street people.

Submitted by tenofspades at 2015-02-24 19:43:30 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Jesus saves!

Submitted by grÜeMaster emeritus and uberlord supreme at 2015-02-24 14:15:44 EST (#)
Rating: -2

maybe captainblasphemy will let you jam your fingers in his blowhole

Submitted by CaptainThorns at 2015-02-24 09:37:56 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2015-02-24 06:08:01 CST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Tom Sorrell at 2015-02-24 06:15:08 EST (#)

If you come through FL let me know. We can jam together.
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Same goes for IL

Submitted by FALLEN at 2015-02-24 09:08:27 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Jules: I'll just walk the earth.

Vincent: What'cha mean walk the earth?

Jules: You know, walk the earth, meet people... get into adventures. Like Caine from "Kung Fu."

VINCENT: How long do you intend to walk the earth?

JULES: Until God puts me where he want me to be.

VINCENT: What if he never does?

JULES: If it takes forever, I’ll wait forever.

VINCENT: So you decided to be a bum?

Submitted by Mr T pities jonnytexmex the old child toucher at 2015-02-24 08:22:10 EST (#)
Rating: -2

I PITY THIS FOOL

Submitted by skrapmetal at 2015-02-24 07:08:01 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Tom Sorrell at 2015-02-24 06:15:08 EST (#)

If you come through FL let me know. We can jam together.

Submitted by Tom Sorrell at 2015-02-24 06:15:18 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Tom Sorrell at 2015-02-24 06:15:08 EST (#)

If you come though FL let me know. We can jam together.

Submitted by Anglophile at 2015-02-24 03:25:18 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by RoadSong at 2015-02-23 18:12:12 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I bring all this up because today I quit my job to pursue a dream I've always had.






WAY TO GO! Follow the dreams....

Submitted by Perk "Grownman Perkiness" man at 2015-02-23 16:05:23 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This is why I respect the fuck out you. You ever end up out west, let us know, I'll come to a show. GodSpeed, Tomato Top!, Real shit, mad respect.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2015-02-23 15:09:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by JonnyX at 2015-02-23 13:48:48 EST (#)
Rating: 2

wow..i'm kinda speechless...good for you!

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2015-02-23 12:42:12 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Give 'em hell, Sockpenis.




Even the Chinese are against me.

-- Homer Simpson
The Last Temptation of Homer