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Donovan's Child of the 80s Memories

Submitted by ryandonovan at 2002-03-10 17:21:44 EST
Rating: 1.83 on 52 ratings (52 reviews) (Review this item) (V)


I have seen dozens of these “Nostalgic 80s” chain emails going around, and while some of them are pretty enjoyable, they don’t really bring back personal memories for me from the 1980s. So I came up with a similar kind of list, but one that included things that described the 80s that I knew as a boy born in the mid-70s. All of the items on the list are original; they are not stolen from other 80s lists. Let’s see if they describe your childhood as much as they describe mine…

You noticed right away every time they modified KITT slightly.

You were always looking for an opportunity to say “I love it when a plan comes together.”

When your neighbor got an Apple computer, the best use for it seemed to be creating “Happy Birthday” banners with Print Shop.

You clearly remember that in the original arcade version of Punch-Out!!, the Mr. Sandman was the final opponent, not Mike Tyson.

Alex P. Keaton was a perfectly acceptable role model.

Although you don’t remember the actual day, you know May 25, 1977 is a momentous date in history.

You had no idea when President Reagan was shot, but you totally aware when Simon Le Bon almost died in a boating accident.

You thought all along that Prince was lame, but you had no problem with Boy George.

It did not seem at all weird that both Sean Connery and Roger Moore came out with James Bond movies in the same year.

There were never-ending arguments between your friends about who “discovered” G.I. Joe, Transformers, or Masters of the Universe.

If you turned on the TV and The New Zoo Revue was on, you knew you had gotten up too early for Saturday morning cartoons.

Your dad would roll his eyes when he told you to do something, and you said, “What ‘jou talkin’ ‘bout, Willis?”

You thought Disney cartoon movies like Snow White and Pinocchio were coming out in theaters for the first time.

You played with Legos sometimes, but looking back, you don’t know why you didn’t play with them exclusively.

The only reason you wanted to get cable was so you could watch MTV. That was also the only reason your parents DIDN’T want to get cable.

It was strange, but not unheard of, for a boy to have a Cabbage Patch Kid. And if a girl didn’t have at least two, her parents were poor.

By never missing an episode of The Cosby Show, you helped establish NBC’s Thursday night as Must See TV.

You couldn’t wait until you were older so you could get a mohawk like Mr. T or a scar like Rambo or a pet alligator like Sony Crockett.

Jem and her rock ‘n’ roll Hologram friends were babes.

You were so happy when you got Intellivision so you brag to your friend who still had Atari. But almost right away he trumped you by getting ColecoVision. Years later, it wouldn’t matter because everyone got Nintendo.

You got in trouble at a sleep-over for sneaking downstairs to watch Friday Night Videos or Saturday Night Live.

The remote control for your new VCR was actually attached to the VCR by a cord.

G.I. Joe could fight Star Wars, because the figures were the same size, but not Masters of the Universe, because they were too big.

You begged your parents to take you to see E.T., then got mad at them when you had to wait in line at the theater for what might have been days.

You snickered at the programming executives at NBC because you could tell right away that the new Saturday morning cartoon The Snorks was just a cheap underwater imitation of The Smurfs.

After everyone else got to have their birthday at Showbiz Pizza, your lame parents had your birthday at Chuck E. Cheese’s.

As far as you knew, Ronald Regan had been and would be President for your entire life.

Every dime of your allowance went toward Garbage Pail Kids, which your parents reluctantly allowed. 1st Series cards were very rare. You would have completed the 2nd Series set if it hadn’t been for the impossible-to-find “C” version of “Fran Fran”. You cried foul when someone tried to trade one to you that had been peeled off then poorly stuck back on. By the time the 7th Series came out, you had had enough.

Whenever an action figure launched an afternoon cartoon, you lamented how it “sold out”.

You never solved Rubik’s Cube by peeling off the stickers. Instead, you took a screwdriver and popped out all the pieces, then re-assembled it correctly. Your dad actually bought a how-to book to solve the damn thing. Some kid always brought the next Rubik-like incarnation (pyramid, chain, snake, globe) to school and got it taken away by a teacher. And you didn’t give a rat’s ass when you heard that Rubik was some Russian guy that didn’t make a dime off his invention.

There was nothing unhealthy about having Transformer sheets and pillow cases.

While your friends had cool ones, your mom bought you a Trapper Keeper with a picture of a hot air balloon on it. So you cut the clear plastic cover down the side, removed the picture, and put sports pictures under the plastic instead.

You wondered what would happen if you put a Twisted Sister tape in your little brother’s Teddy Ruxpin.

You thought the 1984 Summer Games were the first Olympics ever. Because of them, you thought Track and Field events were cool for about a week.

You asked your mom why you weren’t allowed to wear a bandana tied around your pant leg at school.

You could finish singing the line of this TV theme song with no problem: “Here we are, face to face, a couple of…” But you probably can’t do it anymore.

You wondered why people called the Dallas Cowboys “America’s Team”, because for as long as you could remember, they sucked.

You don’t remember Pac-Man being as much of a defining symbol of the 80s as people make it out to be today. Besides, Ms. Pac-Man was a much better game.

You never watched Airwolf, but the neighbor kids thought it was the shit.

Magic Shell was a miracle of modern science.

You didn’t understand why Song Of The South was banned forever.

Someone actually wore a single sequined glove to school, and regretted it for the rest of the year.

You shouted “The Libyans!” every time you saw a Volkswagen van.

Some of your friends weren’t allowed to watch “inappropriate” shows like The Dukes of Hazzard.

You figured the guys from Wham! got a lot of chicks.

You couldn’t wait for the next Superman and Rocky movies, even though you had never really seen the original ones.

There are some Empire Strikes Back glasses from Burger King somewhere in your parents’ attic.

Everyone in the neighborhood got a Huffy, but you were stuck with your banana-seat Schwinn. Several years later, everyone got a Powell Peralta, and your parents got you a Nash.

You thought working in a little Fotomat hut in the middle of a parking lot would be pretty cool job.

The kid with the new refrigerator always had the best cardboard-box fort.

You were the last one to own a see-through Swatch, and the last one to still be wearing one six months later. To your credit, you never lost the rubber face guard, which made the watch impossible to read at 12:00.

By watching Danger Mouse, you thought you were more sophisticated than kids watching regular after-school cartoons.

The first guy in your school to get his left ear pierced was either really cool or really dangerous.

Every T-shirt you wore in junior high either advertised a brand of surf gear that you had never used or a Hard Rock Café location that you had never visited.

The Greatest American Hero was quite simply the best superhero ever, with the best theme song to boot.

Although you despised the Care Bears, you had to go along when your mom took your sister to The Care Bears Movie.

When you role-played Magnum P.I., everyone wanted to be T.C. and fly the helicopter. Ironically, you had never seen an entire episode of Magnum. You also had no idea what your mom was talking about when she made wistful comments about wanting to “brush the rug” with Tom Selleck’s mustache.

You knew nothing about marketing, but even you could tell Energizer’s commercial spokesman, the loud and bald Australian hulk Jacko, was a bad idea.

You made fun of kids who were into Thundercats.

You had an “Avoid The Noid” sticker on one of your notebooks, not really understanding what the Noid had to do with pizza.

You couldn’t say “Who you gonna call?” without getting an emphatic response.

Your sister dressed up as Princess Leia for Halloween, and your mom spent an hour trying to get the buns in her hair just right, but ended up giving her a French braid instead.

The Garfield TV specials were reasons not to go play outside. You hotly anticipated every new Book Of Garfield, trying to predict what color it would be, what the title would be, and what kooky quip Garfield would be saying on the cover. Your cousin, obviously an idiot, preferred Heathcliff.

Although you didn’t watch The Great Space Coaster very often, you totally bought into Speed Reader’s inhuman ability (even though he flipped the pages from last to first), and you repeated “No gnus is good gnus with Gary Gnu” too often at school.

You read a few MAD magazines even though most of the jokes were over your head.

You never had enough pegs of one color to make the Lite-Brite picture that you wanted to.

Your sister burned the crap out of her Holly Hobby Shrinky Dinks in the oven.

You couldn’t believe they took Manimal off the air after such a short period of time, since it was such an awesome show.

You learned the meaning of the word “plethora” from The Three Amigos.

You didn’t know what a “soldier of fortune” was, but it was exactly what you wanted to be when you grew up.

You couldn’t figure out why Alanis was supposed to be the cute one on You Can’t Do That On Television.

You felt like a badass when you shouted “By the power of Grayskull!”

Coca-Cola Classic never quite tasted like Old Coke.

You loved Presto Magix, but you never had the patience to complete a scene.

Even though they were meant for girls, you wore a couple of black plastic bracelets. You dad hoped it was just a phase.

You lamented that the Tron action figures never really caught on, considering how rad the movie was.

You wondered what Gargamel had against the Smurfs, and what the hell happened to Azrael’s mangled ear.

You tricked your mom into letting you see D.C. Cab, telling her how it had to be okay for kids since Mr. T was in it.

You pretended not to like the song “Every Rose Has Its Thorn”. You also thought Guns N’ Roses sang it.

All you knew about Dynasty, Dallas, and Falcon Crest was that they were on really late at night.

You were excited when your mom bought you a Kodak Disc camera for your birthday, but only used it once, to take out-of-focus pictures of your cat.

You wanted to get in on the game when your parents had adult friends over to play Trivial Pursuit. After about 15 minutes of not understanding the questions, you got bored and wanted to play Chutes and Ladders.

Hands down, Intellivison had the most complicated video game controller ever.

You pouted when your mom wouldn’t let you hang a Spuds MacKenzie poster on your wall.

You called the hide-and-seek game “Ghost in the Graveyard”, but your cousins from out of town called it “Bloody Murder”.

You were always jealous of watching adult shows that aired after your 8 PM bedtime, especially Cheers, because you could always hear your mom laughing from downstairs while you were trying to fall asleep.

You hated the “cliffhanger ” format of Underdog and never managed to see the conclusion.

All your friends were either Celtics or Lakers fans. You didn’t really care about basketball, but you still wanted a pair of Air Jordans.

You were reminded of yourself when you saw Splash and watched John Candy drop things as an excuse to look up women’s skirts.

You and the neighborhood kids had huge G.I. Joe versus Star Wars battles that always ended in the lame kid not playing by the “rules” and going home mad with his toys… and some of yours. The kid with overprotective parents made him put his initials on the bottom of the feet of his action figures. He was only one that got all his figures back.

You watched in amazement when your friend’s older brother won Dragon’s Lair on a single quarter.

You thought you were pretty tech-savvy when you learned how to make the screen “snow” on your dad’s brand new Radio Shack computer.

Your parents still regret the day they allowed you to watch Poltergeist.

You stopped whatever you were doing to watch Pepsi’s Max Headroom commercials, but thought his ensuing TV show was terrible.

Schoolhouse Rock was for pussies.

You hated Russians. You believed your dad when he told you Sting was a pinko commie for singing a song about them.

You didn’t see the movie Wall Street until the 1990’s.

You never thought Bon Jovi was cool.

You didn’t see what all the fuss over Ricky Schroeder was about.

You couldn’t wait to save up enough Proofs Of Purchase to send away for a Hooded Cobra Commander. You were hoping you could pull off the hood to see what his face looked like.

You had no idea what Speed Racer was when you saw it on older kids’ T-shirts.

You and your friends unanimously agreed that McDonald’s had the better burgers and Burger King had the better fries.

Your mom knew The Fridge was a football player, but she didn’t know his real name nor what team he played for.

Tom Hanks and Michael Keaton made funny movies.

The foolish parents of the dangerous kid on your street let him have an actual Rambo knife, which he claimed contained explosives in the handle. You never admitted that you had never seen First Blood because it was rated R.

You could never tell if Smurfette was getting it on with Handy or Hefty, but assumed she had been inappropriately touched at some point by Papa Smurf.

You once secretly tried on your sister’s Wonder Woman Underoos.

You hated the San Francisco 49ers because they never freakin’ lost.

You knew Eddie Murphy had a hit song, and you recognized it when the slacker kids sang it in Summer School.

You didn’t know what the word “gay” meant, but you thought it described Michael Jackson perfectly.

You couldn’t wait for the first day of school so you could show off your new folders, which bore the pictures of Hannibal, Face, Murdock, and B.A. Baracus.

You taped Van Halen’s Dreams video off MTV because you thought the Blue Angels were wicked.

When you got G.I. Joe toys on Christmas, you only mildly concerned yourself with how Santa Claus got around copyright infringement laws by making them in his workshop. When you asked your dad about it, he made some joke about “outsourcing to Hasbro” that you didn’t get.

Your family always rented movies from a tiny video store that was named after the store owner, and he was always out of the new releases because he stocked only one copy of each. He had plenty of Beta new releases, though.

Not long ago, you were thankful for Napster so you could download songs that you hadn’t heard in a decade and finally figure out who sang them, like One Night In Bangkok by Murray Head, I Beg Your Pardon by Kon Kan, Puttin’ On The Ritz by Taco, At This Moment by Billy Vera and the Beaters, You Spin Me Round by Dead Or Alive, Electric Avenue by Eddy Grant, and Pop Goes The World by Men Without Hats.

You thought it was silly that your parents made you read for an hour before your bedtime every night. It was even sillier that comics didn’t count as books. And your friends made fun of you for it.

Transformers would kick the crap out of GoBots.

You were confused every time they talked about Reagan’s “Star Wars” on the news.

KangaROOS seemed really useful, even though the pockets were barely big enough for a penny.

You thought She-Ra was a pretty weak female spin-off of He-Man, but nevertheless, she was kinda hot.

You gave yourself a bloody nose trying to spin a guitar ZZ Top-style.

You weren’t just quoting the movie when you said, “Ferris Bueller, you’re my hero.”

Only the weird kids thought D.C. was cooler than Marvel.

Every time you picked up a kitchen utensil you said, “Now that’s a knife.”

You cried on Halloween because your dad said a Johnny #5 costume would be too damn hard to make.

Your older brother still had KISS posters on his wall.

Your mom would yell at you when your G.I. Joe accessories got stuck in the vacuum cleaner.

You loved to say “Psyche!” when faking somebody out.

You scraped up your back trying to breakdance on your driveway, realizing that a cardboard sheet would have been a good idea after all.

If you lived near Chicago, you recall Van Halen’s Jump as the Cubs 1984 theme song.

Thanks to Miami Vice, you will always associate pink flamingoes with drug dealers.

Only the spoiled kid down the street had the Millennium Falcon.

You knew a guy in school that claimed he could do the Moonwalk perfectly, but never wanted to show anybody.

You asked your mom about the process of legally changing your first name, because you were seriously considering “Bad Attitude”.

Your friends made fun of your Scooby-Doo sleeping bag, because who the hell watched Scooby-Doo anymore?

Although you always rooted for the Autobots, you figured the Decepticons would win in real life. I mean, Optimus Prime was just a truck, but Megatron was a big-ass gun.

At one time or another, people told you that you looked like every kid in Stand By Me except River Phoenix.

Your Moon Boots wouldn’t fit in your locker at school.

Tone Loc’s Loced After Dark was your first – and last – rap album. It was also your first CD.

You liked making Dungeons & Dragons character sheets but didn’t actually like playing the game. You never figured out what the hell the white crayon was for that came with the dice, but you still have one rolling around in the back of your desk drawer.

Your mom wouldn’t buy you a Hoth playset, but instead made one for you out of styrofoam and toothpicks.

Alan Hunter was the best MTV VJ.

You liked your camouflage pants, but they were nothing compared to your T-shirt that had a picture of a fiery skull and the words “AIR FORCE PILOTS DON’T DIE, THEY JUST GO TO HELL TO REGROUP.”

You incorporated your sister’s Barbie into your G.I. Joe game so Flint could get it on with a proportionately 12-foot-tall civilian.

About 20 minutes after opening a new set of Play-Doh, you always ended up with one color: brown.

For a portable video game, Head To Head Football had pretty sweet graphics, which amounted to flashing dots representing the players.

You thought stuffed animals made by anyone other than Dakin were inferior.

The creepy, lazy-eyed guy on the block who fancied himself a trendsetter was the only moron to get a Betamax. Years later, he also bought a Laser Disc player.

When you learned that Catherine Bach, the actress that played Daisy Duke, had a baby in real life, you were jealous of the baby because it got to suckle the boob of the most gorgeous woman in the world. Although you thought you were totally normal, you were correct in assuming that you should never mention that to anyone ever.

Your sister washed the hair of her Strawberry Shortcake figures to see if they would stop smelling like fruit.

You were disappointed when Burger King revealed what Herb looked like.

Only the coolest kids got to see the opening midnight showing of Return Of The Jedi. You had to see at a matinee.

Freezy Freakies gloves never changed colors no matter how cold it was outside.

The liner came out when you took off one of your Moon Boots one time, and you haven’t been able to fit it back in since.

You assumed Zips would revolutionize the shoe industry by phasing out shoelaces altogether.

You had no idea what love was, but you still knew the significance of Alex and Ellen at the train station.

You wished your jean jacket was stone-washed.

Captain Lou Albano seemed like he would be a pretty cool – albeit surly – dad.

You had no problem fitting an entire pouch of Big League Chew in your mouth.

Your uncle thought he was original every time he made a joke about the spot on Gorbachev’s head.

You didn’t get weepy at the end of Charlotte’s Web. Honest.

You had no idea that Inspector Gadget, Tennessee Tuxedo, and Maxwell Smart were all the same person.

Matching up a Star Wars figure to its original gun was impossible.

You forgot to watch for Halley’s Comet.

You plotted the destruction of your sister’s My Little Ponies and Monchichis.

You ate plenty of green M&M’s, yet never hit a home run in Little League. Years later, you discovered that they didn’t work on dates, either.

You had a subscription to Dynamite magazine so you could read the latest interviews with Gary Coleman and the cast of Square Pegs.

Your mom yelled at you when you stuck Wacky Packages stickers all over your bedroom door.

You thought it was hilarious the first time you filled out a Mad Lib with dirty words, until your mom found it.

You badly misquoted the following line from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: “My best friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who’s going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night… I guess it’s pretty serious.”

You had a Miami Vice theme birthday party and fought over who got to be Sony Crockett, clearly the biggest stud that ever lived.

You were actually the right age to enjoy WWF wrestling, and tuned in to Wrestlemania specials to watch Hulk Hogan, Junk Yard Dog, Iron Sheik, Rowdy Roddy Piper, Macho Man, and Nikolai Volkoff.

While other kids had Hot Wheels, you were stuck with Matchbox.

Every time you played with Lincoln Logs, you ended up building the same thing: a log cabin.

You thought George Lucas was only taking 5 years off after Return Of The Jedi.

You were horrified when you saw that the visitors in V were really alien reptiles in human disguises, but you loved it when they ate mice.

Of all the unknowns in The Outsiders, you predicted C. Thomas Howell would make it big.

Between you and your friends, you managed to collect all the Mr. Men books. But you only read a fraction of them.

In the summertime, a Slurpee was the solution to almost every problem.

You and your friends had long existential conversations about why Snake Eyes didn’t talk and whether Destro kept his mask on while he slept and showered.

You knew that by the time Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo came out, the fad was already over.

Review This Item




Submitted by ridiculous at 2011-02-26 02:39:29 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Made me reminisce.

Submitted by Merlina at 2011-02-25 15:02:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2



but I was a GURL... all true stuff tho.

and I DO love it when a plan comes together.

And I had a sad girly crush on Murdock...

Submitted by FALLEN at 2011-02-25 13:44:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

danger mouse

Submitted by nobody_gets_out_alive at 2010-04-12 19:30:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Remember quite a few of these.

I fondly remember the megatron restaurant, it all went to pot when it became McDonalds though and has now closed!
Submitted by Simon <biglou.at.tiscali.co.uk> at 2004-04-12 16:21:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

As an Englishman I can only apologise for that song that spawned Live Aid, but I seem to remember that We Are The World was just as cheesy.
Was Megatron a robot, do I remember? We had a burger restaurant called Megatron outside the USAF base at RAF Alconbury shaped like a flying saucer. I'm sure you had to order your food using a touch screen, or did I imagine it? It became a McDonalds in the early '90s. Shame.

Submitted by jordangirl78 at 2007-08-17 12:04:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by St_Jimmy at 2006-11-03 17:04:29 EST (#)
Rating: 2

"You read a few MAD magazines even though most of the jokes were over your head."

Hell, I had a subscription! Most of the jokes were over my head though.

Submitted by rad1101 at 2006-10-29 05:20:04 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I used to be friends with the people who did New Zoo Revue

Emmy jo and Doug

Submitted by Chroniclysm at 2006-10-29 04:48:24 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by frankthebear at 2006-10-29 04:38:36 EST (#)
Rating: 2

finding this just made my day!
and Thundercats ruled!

Submitted by supadupapupa at 2005-11-18 04:17:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This was a fantastic walk down memory lane, I loved underdog...

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-09-02 03:54:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

loved most of it- Sorry but McDonalds fries rock and BK burgers rock- that's the way it is.
Also-who didn't want to be Tubbs when some punk came to the car window and he held up the sawed-off shotgun-"fuck off-I'm a cop" his look seemed to say. Talk about power.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-04-12 16:21:14 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

As an Englishman I can only apologise for that song that spawned Live Aid, but I seem to remember that We Are The World was just as cheesy.
Was Megatron a robot, do I remember? We had a burger restaurant called Megatron outside the USAF base at RAF Alconbury shaped like a flying saucer. I'm sure you had to order your food using a touch screen, or did I imagine it? It became a McDonalds in the early '90s. Shame.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-02-16 00:21:15 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Kasarius at 2004-01-31 02:08:49 EST (#)
Rating: 0

"And I don't know if you remember this gem: Smear the Queer. Anyone? Anyone?"

Funny story about that... well, not so much funny as tragic. We used to ahve a "Fun Lunch" back at my grade school once a year where we'd all get pizza and hot dogs and Coke, and then we'd have basically a schoolwide recess for half an hour. Well, it wasn't long before someone came up with the genius idea of having a massive scale game of Smear the Queer, with one target per round. So that totals 600 students going after 1 student each time. After that fateful day, "Fun Lunch" was but a fond memory. I think you can fill in the rest.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-01-01 04:28:39 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This list is awesome. I was a tomboy growing up and my parents would never buy me GI Joe or He-man or anything cool because it was for boys. I had to dress up Barbie and Ken in tinfoil armor and weild cardboard-cutout swords wrapped in tinfoil. I also made little guns for them too. What makes me want to puke is all these fifteen-year old kids with Transformers, Strawberry Shortcake, Rainbowbrite, and others, on their freaking t-shirts, just to look cool. Go ahead and ask them if they've ever even seen the show. Ninety-nine percent haven't, I guarantee it. My cousin was wearing a Dukes of Hazard t-shirt, and I asked if she'd ever seen it. Her response? "Oh I've seen one or two . . ." In the vaguest tone imaginable.

Submitted by Ingsoc at 2003-12-26 13:38:50 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I ejaculate with glee!

Submitted by jimbo at 2003-11-20 16:27:08 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Born in '70.

"Ghost in the Graveyard", AKA "Bloody Murder", AKA "Ain't No Boogeyman Out Tonight".

And I don't know if you remember this gem: Smear the Queer. Anyone? Anyone?

Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-10-06 11:57:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

"You and your friends unanimously agreed that McDonald's had the better burgers and Burger King had the better fries." ..I have no idea how many times that coversation has come up between me and my friends at school,but what can I say..its true.

Submitted by MOssiah at 2003-08-13 04:21:18 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Chad_Sexington at 2003-07-31 20:28:51 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Don't forget Live Aid and the bloody Christmas songs that caused it.

Submitted by pacificsharp at 2003-07-27 00:08:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Yes Transformers do kick GoBot ass.

Submitted by Goldneyes at 2003-06-17 11:40:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I STILL have my cricket doll!! and teddy rupskin! And kid sister. and those glow worm things.
I was born in '80, but my sister is 7 years older, so I got all the "cool junior high" kids coming over to our house.
When they watched MTV, I had to go to my room, or play outside.
I remember taking my little plastic cabbage patch dolls to 2nd grade with me, and the class bully stole my favorite one. Stephanie Bellows from Rincon, Georgia....I'm still on the look out for you!
I remember my favorite Friday outfit was pink spandex bike shorts, my stonewahed and splatter painted jean skirt, and my new kids on the block t shirt.

Submitted by Agent_FUBAR at 2003-06-12 10:58:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Goddamn that was a trip down memory lane
Im gonna have to watch Ghostbuster and the Three Amigos again tonight
"do you know what a plethora is?"
"No El Guapo"

Submitted by cellar_door at 2003-06-08 15:42:32 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

You were totally right about the Greatest American Hero. Best t.v. hero ever! Oh yeah, remember the Mad Scientist Kits? You know, Disect an Alien or Build a Monster? Now those were cool...

Submitted by Fleury75 at 2003-06-08 14:56:18 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


once in awhile, as you sift through the crap on post sites, you run across a gem. Dude, this is quite possibly the funniest post I've ever read! I'm sitting at work and I had to show my colleagues (who i assure you, are working very hard) the post. They didnt think it was very funny: then i realized they are all about 10 years older than me. I was born mid 70's and dude you hit the nail on the head.

I DID watch Airwolf, and my neighbor did think it was the shit! I had Transformer sheets (maybe i still do ;) and The Greatest American Hero does have the best theme song!

Oh man im gonna ctrl-c this bad boy and send it to my friends.

dude thanks for the laugh

Submitted by El_Guapo at 2003-06-08 14:28:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

best post ever!

i laughed my ass off. thanks :)

Submitted by Rokinroj at 2003-05-30 03:20:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 0


"You figured the guys from Wham! got a lot of chicks"

Submitted by jgirl3481 at 2003-05-30 03:03:09 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I was born in 81 but I remember most of the things in here. Me and my brother would always fight over the TV on saturday mornings! I have a question for all the girls of the 80's. Does anyone remember a doll named Cricket? She had blond hair and you had to buy different tapes that had stories and jokes? She was most famous for her phrase, "or what" Most of my friends don't remember this doll and I was just wondering if anyone else does

Submitted by SarGasm at 2003-05-12 06:55:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

oh, and i forgot about the "Ultimate Belch".

for those of you who didn't grow up with me (thank whatever deity you prefer) the "Ultimate Belch" (it's in quotes because of the way you have to say it...with reverence) is the direct result of combining two seemingly harmless junk foods.

7-Up and Fizzes.

you pop a few fizzes in your mouth, and chase them down with several big gulps from your green glass 7-Up bottle.

then, wait for a few seconds, and unleash a window-rattling brachiation upon the neighborhood!

Submitted by Hadooken at 2003-05-12 06:49:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

good stuff. i also was born in 82. you think that someday there will be "hey remember the 90's" emails?

Submitted by SarGasm at 2003-05-12 05:14:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

oh yeah! born in '73! guess that makes me the old fart here...but i had my Aquaman Underoos! ok, i grew up poor, and my parents thought "pop culture" was something to do with all those kids drinking soda.

here's one for you guys tho, i was hooked on these shows as a kid...who remembers them?

Automan, Misfits of Science, and Manamal.

most people remember Misfits, but draw blanks on the other ones...how about you?

Submitted by Random Joe at 2003-04-11 11:59:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

ok we need...

Voltron-best cartoon ever.........EVER!!

spending every last cent on Shinobi in the arcade not to mention Bad Dudes and Skate or Die


hearing about how some kid got shot by a cop because he was playing with Laser Tag (I always wanted the white rifle)

orange Hot Wheel tracks

bed tents (mine was transformers)

and ladies..fashion star phillies

I don't know about you guys but my sisters Teddy Ruxpin broke like three times, she also had Grubby the caterpillar that you could link to Teddy with a cable.

Hello--Easy Bake Oven

Submitted by Queen at 2003-04-11 05:27:09 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

This was AWESOME!!!! I loved it, and it brought back so many memories and i'm female!!

Allow me to touch basis with a few of the girls out there.....I don't have alot, but enough to jog a memory or two...

Remember "Fantasy" folders, with the pictures of unicorns or pegagus on them, a 'must have' for school.

Jelly shoes for the summer, had to have a pair in every color for every outfit, or just get the clear ones, they went with everything.

Remember putting on multiple pairs of socks for the 'color effect'..maybe even reversing the colors on each foot to look cooler.

Or even rolling your socks down instead of folding them.

Remember crimping your hair?

Remember how your bangs had to be "just right" or you just couldn't go to school?

Remember singing and dancing in the mirror to "Like a virgin" by Madonna and turning it off real fast when you heard someone coming?

Remember biker shorts under skirts being completely a fashion statement? and almost expected when wearing a skirt....especially your guess miniskirt.

Remember the fad over Keds being cool, but when L.A. Gear came out with the pink and white "Michael Jackson series" with reinstones all over them you "HAD TO HAVE THEM!!"

Remember those little plastic circle things that you had about a hundred of floating around your house, that were used to bunch your shirt up on the side and aviod having to tie a knot?

Remember those plastic charm necklaces that the goal was to get all the 'current charms"?

Remember pulling all your hair up into a pony tail on the side of your head with a great big neon colored bow or pony tail holder?

Remember when that second hole ear piercing only the cool kids had?

Remember not ever being able to have enough jelly bracelets?

Remember when you had to get a cross or rosarie to wear to be more like Madonna?

Remember having a pair of any lace gloves that you ended up cutting the fingers out of to look cool?

Remember slicing slits in your jeans and your jean shorts to look cooler?

Remember your jean shorts being the ones that folded right above the knee and wearing neon colored biker shorts underneath them that had to match your shirt and socks?

Remember Rainbow Brite and the Sprites?

Remember Strawberry shortcake and Holly Hobby?

Remember Care Bears and My little pony?

Remember MunChichi's?

Remember Jem and the Hollograms?

Remember having an exact regimine of your after school shows you HAD to watch and knowing exacly every channel all of your fave Sat morning cartoons were on?

Remember being mad about Garbage Pail kids and the boys who had them b/c they were saying mean things about Cabbage patch kids?

Remember always being able to tell the 'fake' cabbage patch kids from the must have real ones?

Ahhhh and don't tell me ANYONE could forget their BIGWHEEL!!!!!!! The boys had the ones with the water guns on the handle bars and the breaks on the side, and the girls had the ones with the tassles on the handle bars and ours sometimes had a watergun and brake handle too. Damn I loved my Bigwheels.

Remember how fun slip and slide was?

Remember when slip and slide came out with the really cool ones that had the arches of water that sprayed down on you or the pool at the end?

Remember when you used to have to get up to change the channel?

Remember the clear plastic runner down the hall-way at your house b/c your mom was "protecting the carpet"? (the same runner you often wondered would dub as a slip and slide if need be)

Rememeber when running in the house totally out of breath from playing hide-n-seek or some totally ad-libbed game- and getting a HUGE glass of kool-aid and asking all of your friends if they wanted some too....and your mom giving you that "look"...?

Remember the famous saying.."I'm not air conditioning the whole neighborhood!"..?

Remember having dance contests?

Remember making up cheers?

Remember double dutch?

Remember how episode like barbies became and when played you would leave off at a certain place or event and try to pick back up where left off the last time?

Remember the "my seaweed doll" a series of dolls that were mermaids? The main one being a red-head that much resembles Ariel from my little mermaid.

Remember etch-a-sketch on rainy days?

Remember asking about shaving your legs for the first time?

Remember "Wet Paint" shirts were a must have?

Remember anything with the 'dripping paint' effect looked cool including car paint jobs?

Remember the "Avoid the Noid" commercials totally being annoying..? But the Energizer bunny ones being so cute when they came out?

........omg i could go on and on!! I feel sorry for the kids of this decade, that will miss all the awesome stuff we had growing up! Although i am very pleased to say that Strawberry shortcake, carebears, h-man, and transformers are selling again. Check out walmart, i was estatic when i saw carebears on the shelf!!!!

Submitted by dasteve at 2003-04-06 05:25:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Great post! Megatron rules!

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-12-25 04:50:10 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Can't believe I never saw this before when visiting the site!

I just have to throw one more out there...

You remember the last eclipse of the sun and despite warnings from teachers and parents you looked at it when no one was watching, sincerely beieving for the next 6 months that you would wake up blind one morning...

...or maybe it was just me!

Great post!

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-12-18 15:52:00 EST (#)
Rating: 1

Two things:

MuscleMen & Garbage Pail Kids

Submitted by streetpunk at 2002-11-20 11:06:03 EST (#)
Rating: 0

awesome, Ihave to say some stuff about it though. I liked thundercats, but I thought he-man was better. I liked transformers, but I liked the cartoon go-bots better. My parents never bought me leegos, they bought me lock blocks(remember those?) and who could forget about charles in charge? Prince and Bon Jovi will always be cool, they will never die

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-10-17 01:24:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

oh my gawd we all lived the same life back then. how sad! :) Totally relatable. Except it was ME who screwed up the shrinky-dinks! Let's not forget Mork and Mindy too. You know, I just saw Big League Chew in the store the other day, what a pastblast, thanks for mentioning it! Totally hot list.

Submitted by DinoBraco at 2002-10-11 16:28:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Excellent compilation of 1980's nostalgia. You forget to mention getting scared when you made the wrong decision while reading "Choose Your Own Adventure", and going back and convincing yourself that you would have REALLY made the "right" decision...

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-08-18 02:10:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Great recap of the 80's! I remembered almost all. But to add to the often miss-quoted quote from Ferris's day off- that's the original Buffy (Kristy Swanson) who says that quote. Think-movie- with david arquette and Dylan (Luke Perry) from BH 90210.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-08-16 10:53:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

What about the binders with Ziggy... and Jem was Truly Truly Truly Outrageous - No matter what you say.
Not bad of a site.. related to 80% or so.

Love the screwdriver rubik's cube note. - so true...

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-07-29 15:15:49 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I was born in 1982 but still remember the greater majority of these references. Mostly as things I was not allowed to have, say, or do though. Really funny. I sent it to my older sisters. They'll definitely get a kick out of it. Dude, I always used to wish I could have garbage pale kid cards.

Submitted by HARDCOREBANKER at 2002-05-17 19:26:41 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Stupid jerkface, Thundercats ruled. I pity the foo who can't realize that.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-05-17 00:23:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

strawberry shortcake, better than all the weeing pooing dolls in all the world...nostalgia, a very powerful thing.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-05-17 00:23:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

strawberry shortcake, better than all the weeing pooing dolls in all the world...nostalgia, a very powerful thing.

Submitted by upsidedown at 2002-04-04 23:24:17 EST (#)
Rating: 2

interesting, but being born in '82 i don't relate, what i do relate to are the cutsie one's ive recieved in e-mail. maybe the titles of those should have read "born in the eighties" not really of the eighties.. either way.. cool list.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-22 13:15:45 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Good show. That is some funny shit. Yeah, the go-bots sucked, but the transformers were a little too "goody, goody" sometimes for me. I remember one time when I was about 8 yrs old, I took the megatron figure, and transformed him into a gun before my babysitter arrived. This chick was hot! So after my parents left, I told her I wanted to show her something in my bedroom. I instructed her to sit on the bed while I got it out of my closet. I spun around with the gun (megatron) in my hand, and told her that she should probably take her shirt and bra off. Anyone familiar with the megatron figure will remember that the barrel of the gun was his arms that sort of snapped together. While she sat there and looked at me like I was nuts, I motioned with the action figure to take her shirt off. The movement of the gun caused megatron's barrel to come apart, thus ruining my chances to see those beautiful sweater puppies. F*cking megatron! By the way, keep up the good articles!

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-20 12:45:13 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I, too, was born in 76 & I fondly remember a lot of this stuff. I am a girl, so the GI Joe stuff didn't really ring as true, but I loved Masters of the Universe, A-Team & all the references to the "sister's" stuff...I had all of that!

Thanks for a great article.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-15 04:41:20 EST (#)
Rating: 0

WWF the British Bulldog and the Leigion of Doom were the mutts nuts for me,

Thundercats were shite HE-man ruled!

Sorry but for me Airwolf was more enjoyable than the A-Team but now it is the otherway round,

Dukes of Hazzard it wasn't until last week when i saw my first episode for about 15 yrs, did i realize how Pap it really was, can't understand why the dialouge was needed we all knew that Bosshog wasn't happy with Luke and Daisey had the nicest Baps!

Gotta be the best 80's theme to date well done our kid

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-11 18:03:55 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-11 17:44:34 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Not too shabby!

I was born in 1976, and I had at least a 75% agreement rating!

Submitted by Random Joe at 2002-03-11 14:18:25 EST (#)
Rating: 1

I'm sick of eating hoagies! I want a grinder, a sub, a foot-long
hero! I want to live, Marge! Won't you let me live? Won't you,

-- Homer Simpson
Fear of Flying