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My Little Brother Is A Fucking Asshole

Submitted by maiorano84 at 2004-05-24 13:25:11 EDT
Rating: 1.34 on 29 ratings (29 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

I'm sure most of you have read about my little brother one way or another. I love that kid with as much love as an older brother can have, but sometimes.....

Goddammit, sometimes I just want to hit him in the face with a blunt object.

Take last night, for example. We were standing around like a couple of shitheads, I was doing my own thing, when I hear him start speaking all of a sudden. The following conversation went something like this:

KEVIN: ...... wardrobe.
ME: What?
KEVIN: What?
ME: What'd you say?
ME: What'd you just say?
KEVIN: What're you talking about?
ME: Fuck you, what'd you say?
KEVIN: What?
ME: Seriously, stop. What did you say?
KEVIN: (laughing) What did I say?
ME: Alright, Kevin. That's enough, you're pissing me off. What was it that you just said?
KEVIN: ..........
ME: Well?
KEVIN: What?
ME: What the fuck did you say!?
ME: Kevin, I swear to God, I'm going to punch you in the face. What the fuck did you say?
KEVIN: Oh, my math teacher says it all the time.
ME: What!? What the fuck did you say you little bastard!? That doesn't tell me shit!!
KEVIN: (smirking)
ME: Don't you fucking dare.
KEVIN: You look like you stole something out of Barry Manilow's wardrobe.
ME: Thank you. Fucking hell, don't do that. When I tell you to stop, just stop.
KEVIN: Yea, whatever.
ME: (muttering) I was THIS close to punching you in the eye.....
KEVIN: What?
ME: Huh?
KEVIN: What'd you - oh, fuck you.

There you have it. A glimpse into the mind of my younger brother. I painstakingly mold him into the UberBro, and I'm rewarded with a jackass who acts exactly like I do.

This one's for you, Kevin.....

You little shitstain......

Review This Item




Submitted by LottaPasta123 at 2004-05-27 18:49:01 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Your little brother sounds like a fucking asshole.

Submitted by Bellebrown at 2004-05-25 04:09:27 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Funny... I dont know, but it sounds like you're living with the male version of my little sister.

Submitted by Irazy at 2004-05-25 03:08:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Submitted by kireisarah at 2004-05-25 02:58:20 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

+2 for annoying sibs (I'm an only child so I just have to deal with other people's annoying sibs, but still), for making another UberRPG, and just 'cause ;-)

Submitted by Rixes at 2004-05-25 01:14:34 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

+2 for shitstain, I haven't heard someone called that in years. And I need a link to your camwhore pic, WTF I'm not reading all thos posts.

Submitted by maiorano84 at 2004-05-24 22:52:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Haha, thanks Ugaly. I'm debating about making another Ubersite RPG. If you want, I'll let you write one of your own. Just link it back to my other two, and you're good to go.

Submitted by ugaly at 2004-05-24 22:43:04 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Finally...after half an hour of reading piss poor posts and everything about bitching I find something to write about.

You should write another one of those UBER RPG things, but base it off the recent out burst of "i dont like ubersite anymore"

Lojope, the other guy, whoever else has done it can all be characters

-flame - innocent bystander killed from bleeding eyes of pain
-piss and moan/ whine - the rest of uber contracts the stomach flu from yet another piss poor post bitching about bitchjing people bitching

bart can finish off with something cool like "piss off and go you whiny peasant assholes. dont like it then dont tell us you are leaving just GO"

Submitted by SoxSexSax at 2004-05-24 20:18:14 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Not bad. Still, my best friend and his older brother used to beat each other up with their dad's crutches. And my best mate also once stabbed his younger brother in the eye with a Stanley Knife (accidentally, but still...)

Submitted by WiKi at 2004-05-24 19:51:10 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Oh, I forgot:

Peter: Lois, brothers and sisters fighting is as natural as a white man's dialogue in a Spike Lee movie.

Submitted by WiKi at 2004-05-24 19:25:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

This sounds like a conversation my sister and I would have

Submitted by indigogecko at 2004-05-24 16:07:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

when I used to get into fights with my lil' sister, it was usually for invading my room and refusing to leave, so I'd generally grab her arm and start hitting it.. problem being I was a weakling, so she had to rub at it to make it go red before going crying to mummy... somehow it took several years of this before my parents worked out that she was *always* the one that started it, and I was usually worse off than she was.

Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish at 2004-05-24 16:04:05 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Mine's a fuckup and a one man crime wave. You want to trade?

Submitted by Trout at 2004-05-24 15:36:31 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

You can do so much better than this.
You're saved a negative for letting us into your brothers genius way of taunting.

Matt's Mum - Why in the name of christ have you just hospitalised your brother?
Matt - He said 'wardrobe'
Matt's Mum - Son, you're unhinged.
Matt - Just like the wardrobe
Matt's Mum - What you say?..............

Submitted by cwl989 at 2004-05-24 15:14:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by loki at 2004-05-24 15:13:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

If you can't hit your brother in the nose whenever you feel like it, then what is the point of having a family?

Submitted by reallybored at 2004-05-24 15:05:43 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Is EVERY male on this site a God-damned closet homosexual?
Fucking flute boy... I think I'm going to go puke now.

I like girls!

Submitted by Loren at 2004-05-24 14:44:46 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

ChristPuncher -
"I'm using your brother in the next FluteBoy Post"

Fuck'n hell, MUST you?

Is EVERY male on this site a God-damned closet homosexual?
Fucking flute boy... I think I'm going to go puke now.

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-05-24 14:24:00 EDT (#)
Rating: -2

Nope, not good enough for a +2
Nope, not good enough for a +1
Nope, not good enough for a 0
Nope, not good enough for a -1
Yep, this post is shit -2

Submitted by Donitsu2002 at 2004-05-24 14:22:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Fuckin yes +2 for you

Submitted by Lady_Emily_03 at 2004-05-24 14:17:52 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Sounds like my 13 year old sister...

Every day she takes years off my life.

Submitted by slowlyrotting at 2004-05-24 14:01:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

wait till your brother is in his boxers and a-shirt (aka wife beater).

tie him to a chair, duct tape his mouth, and put him out on the balcony.

then pour syrup on his head and crumble up little pieces of bread and stick them to him.

let the hilarity ensue.

to my step-brother, wherever you are: sorry dude. it was all in fun.

Submitted by pfloyd17 at 2004-05-24 13:53:25 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

funny shyte

Submitted by Kristen at 2004-05-24 13:44:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Sometimes, I'm really glad I don't have any siblings.

Submitted by youarsoghey at 2004-05-24 13:37:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

Maybe you shouldn't be so inquisitive.

Submitted by sebcharrot at 2004-05-24 13:33:05 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Now see if that had been my and my little brother, by the second time he said "what?" he'd have been thrown onto the ground, been knelt on the chest and had both his arms and both his legs punched dead.

But I am slightly unhinged when it comes to dealing with my brother..

Submitted by Habeeb Thomas PhD at 2004-05-24 13:33:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


I'm using your brother in the next FluteBoy Post




Submitted by Homsar at 2004-05-24 13:29:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Attendant: have a nice flight.
Jon: what?
Attendant: have a nice flight.
Jon: what?
Attendant: have a nice flight.
Jon: what?
Attendant: have a nice flight.
Jon: huh?
Attendant: have a nice flight.

Submitted by reallybored at 2004-05-24 13:28:17 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

If you change Kevin to Ohlookasquirrel, and Me to Tom you would probably have a pretty accurate IM conversation.

Submitted by Sci-Fi_Man at 2004-05-24 13:27:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 1


When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of
a bottle. They're on TV!

-- Homer Simpson
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