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Straight has an Able 40 Eye

Submitted by Yes at 2005-01-06 14:21:25 EST
Rating: 2.0 on 16 ratings (16 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

Straight peered through the scope, the glowing crosshairs settled upon the head of a tall man wearing a cheap brown suit. The man was sitting on one of the many benches in the park, eating a modest lunch of a turkey sandwich, chips and a YooHoo. Straight could see the slight brown mustache the man's choice of beverage had given him. He continued to scan the park, looking for someone that needed his help.

Next, Straight watched two people slowly walk thought the park, their fingers interlaced, their steps in perfect unison, the very picture of a young couple in love. He watched as they strolled along the path that led around the pond. He watched as they tired of walking and sat together on a bench only a few meters from the man in the brown suit.

Straight was worried. He watched as the man in the brown suit looked over at the young couple, set down his sandwich and took a drink. Straight couldn't help but notice that the man's chocolate mustache grew darker, more pronounced, after his latest drink. Straight watched the man as he stared at the young couple. Straight was their guardian angel now. God had selected him. He would protect their love any way he could.

Even with murder.


Review This Item




Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome at 2005-03-31 14:38:35 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by podium at 2005-03-22 18:54:21 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Phinch at 2005-01-06 18:57:23 EST (#)
Rating: 2

lovely story.

Submitted by loki at 2005-01-06 18:06:22 EST (#)
Rating: 2


just to be different

Submitted by MaximusPadus at 2005-01-06 15:32:40 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This is similar to my post about rifle scopes and random murder.


Submitted by Yes at 2005-01-06 15:13:33 EST (#)
Rating: 0

zakalwe, you fucker, thanks. haha.

Submitted by zakalwe at 2005-01-06 15:08:40 EST (#)
Rating: 2

+2 Great Story.

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2005-01-06 15:06:29 EST (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by Yes at 2005-01-06 15:00:33 EST (#)
Rating: 0

"character development"
damnit I hate being sick... and at work.

Submitted by Yes at 2005-01-06 14:59:10 EST (#)
Rating: 0

I agree, but every time I post some well put together story with charecter development and shit I get four "+2 Great Story"s and two "-2 Die"s and thats it. So I'm trying something new: "30 Second Stories" yeah, thats what I'm gonna call them.

Submitted by munkeypants at 2005-01-06 14:58:30 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB at 2005-01-06 14:56:32 EST (#)
Rating: 2

That eye is freaking me out man.

Submitted by Pentameter at 2005-01-06 14:52:59 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2005-01-06 14:44:44 (#)
Ranking: 2

This was good, but it needs to be fleshed out a little. I would have liked to have read a bit more.

Submitted by tinactin at 2005-01-06 14:44:44 EST (#)
Rating: 2

This was good, but it needs to be fleshed out a little. I would have liked to have read a bit more.

Submitted by Yes at 2005-01-06 14:41:08 EST (#)
Rating: 0

wow... tons of reviews... holy crap... slow down everybody... is it that bad?

everyone is reading 're 16 y/olds' huh?

Submitted by CookieLass at 2005-01-06 14:26:09 EST (#)
Rating: 2


Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time.
Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well, good night.

-- Homer Simpson
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