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Suicide: Some thoughts and genuine questions for any atemptees out there

Submitted by Spam at 2006-03-25 14:23:45 EST
Rating: 1.63 on 47 ratings (47 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

(This post includes SFW image that some viewers may find uncomfortable)

Sparked by: http://www.ubersite.com/m/85742#1900684



As a fairly enlightenined and open minded individual, I find the act of self-termination something which has always confused and hence intrigued me. I’ll never be able to understand what could possibly motivate somebody to feel the need to end their own existence. For this person to feel that there was nothing, absolutely NOTHING left in this world that could possibly ease the pain that they are currently feeling. The idea seems terribly short-sighted to me.

And that’s what it’s all about right? Easing pain? Or maybe I’ve missed something.

Seriously, and I’m talking to any attemptee’s out there now, how fucking unimaginative do you have to be to be sitting there one lonely evening and actually think to yourself that the best thing you can do right now would be to calmly spend a few minutes writing a letter to your loved ones and then go to your favourite tree in the garden with a length of rope ready to end it all.

So you’ve got nothing to live for huh? So the mere idea of waking up tomorrow morning and facing the same pain again is more that you can bare?

WELL DO SOMETHING ABOUT THEN YOU FUCKING PUSSY.

Take advantage of your situation: You’re at rock bottom, you’ve got nothing to lose and you no longer care whether you live or die, right? Well don’t you see what this means?

IT MEANS THAT YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT.

Rob a bank. Start a fight with 25 gun-toting gangsters. Go chat up that girl you were always too afraid to talk to. Better yet, apply for MASSIVE amounts of credit from various companies and proceed to rack up monumental amounts of debt in a mammoth shopping spree. you can then sell all of your purchases and use the cash to flee the country. May I suggest Jamaica?

Once you’ve made the decision to kill yourself, there are no consequences for anything you do from that moment because if whatever it is you DO do fails horribly you can always go back to plan A. It’s not like things are going to get any worse right?


It’s not that simple though is it? If you’ve been there yourself you’re probably sitting there thinking to yourself “you just don’t understand man.” And you’re right I don’t - I’ve never been there, and god willing, I never will. So I would appreciate you explaining it to me.


There are exceptions of course. The guy who loses his entire family in a car accident because he fell asleep at the wheel for example. Fair one, I’d probably do the same. But the thing is, the two people I have known that have taken this route were not in that situation.


Ever been to a suicide’s funeral? If you have, you’ll know that the predominant emotion throughout the group in one of helpless confusion. ‘Why did he do it?’, ‘Why didn’t she do X instead?’ etc, etc.



I guess the experience of losing a friend to this is what fuels my morbid curiosity and like all people in this situation I find myself in a futile search for answers that don’t really matter.


So Uber, you guys are a fairly fucked up and overly medicated group and I’m sure there are a few of you who have actually made ‘genuine’ attempts at suicide. To these people I would like to respectfully ask the following questions so as to alleviate my (and other’s) ignorance..


1. After making the decision, did you ever consider my thoughts above regarding having nothing to lose and just doing something fucking crazy, Joe Vs The Volcano style? if so, why didn’t you go through with it?

2. How could you justify the inevitable pain caused by your death to your friends and family? Did you even consider them? Having been a griever, I find ETS’s flippant ‘it must be very inconvenient’ comment a touch insulting. Yes mate, it IS fucking inconvenient and maybe if people truly realised the amount off pain and damage such an act causes to such a large group of people then they might try and think of some other way to alleviate their pain.

3. if you have attempted (and apparently failed) to kill yourself, and assuming that you have no immediate plans to try again, do you now acknowledge that it was a mistake, and, dare I say, a stupid idea?

4. what caused that realisation?



And finally, as an aside which I feel a few Americans may get offended over or at least feel a touch uncomfortable about, I would like to talk about the infamous ‘Jumpers’ from Sept 11th. The following question is sparked from a documentary I saw recently about a particular photo from that historic day titled ‘The falling man’. A photo which, even though I have no real strength of feeling about that day being far removed from it as I was, I still find uncomfortable to look at. A photo which, incidentally, was vilified by the American public and subsequently but very consciously ignored - even though it incites more emotion (in me at least) than any other still photograph I’ve ever seen.


5. In the eyes of the catholic church, would those poor souls who flung themselves from the burning towers actually be considered suicides, and hence automatically committed to the fiery depths of hell for all eternity where Harvey Keitel will get his jollies by thrusting pineapples in uncomfortable places? (not the back of the Volkswagen)?

6. If so, would it not be reasonable to consider that they may have felt that jumping was the best way to actually extend their life, rather than end it prematurely, if only for a few seconds?



Again, it’s not my intention to insult anyone here and don’t tell me ‘you just don’t understand’ because instead, you could actually use this as an opportunity to educate me.


I await your responses.


Below is the ‘Falling Man’ picture which, as previously stated, some of you may find uncomfortable.
















The Falling Man.jpg
The Falling Man.jpg


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Reviews


Submitted by Linus at 2008-08-17 13:50:38 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

+2 Spam. I hope this works--goddamn thing took me an hour to write.

Submitted by apollo88 at 2006-08-22 15:05:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-08-22 09:21:59 (#)
Ranking: 2

Equations + internet insults = A very dull way to poke fun at each other.

Can't we just go back to the good old days were I would come up with something terribly original about you being a scouser and you respond with a suitibly inept comment about my greasy hair? """


yeah - gay innit.






Submitted by Stuch at 2006-08-11 11:27:32 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

I have caused many an argument and recieved many a strange look by saying that I love that photo. But it does have amazing composition, which, when coupled with the subject matter, creates a truly moving piece.

Submitted by Davros at 2006-04-11 19:37:01 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Rate Gumshoe you Cunt or I am not doing any more.

http://www.ubersite.com/m/85598

You made me do it, so you are responsible for the millions, (2), new fans the series has attracted. If I don't write anymore, then I shall set them on you with their evil -2namis.

CUNT.

-Dave

Submitted by MyTeeOne at 2006-03-27 13:13:03 EST (#)
Rating: 2

It's kind of hard to explain unless you've lived a life you want out of bad enough that suicide isn't an ending but a release. Yeah...you think of your family and friends but it just doesn't matter anymore...you're to far gone. It's not rational, but that's what makes it reasonable...to no longer be (hurt, scared, sad, lonely, whatever) which has been such an overbearing constant, but to be free.

To be free from it all.

I got better obviously, I had a few good friends that saved my worthless hide. And that might be the problem...my worthless hide. For me, it was a feeling of life just wasn't worth it. I didn't want to play the game anymore...it just wasn't worth it.

Imagine, if you can, envying the dead for the life they no longer have to lead.

I got better and I'm glad I did. In order to truly understand it though you have to be there...at that point in your life. I could try to explain further but it would be a post in itself. If you really want to no more drop me an e-mail.

Submitted by wardy at 2006-03-26 19:55:52 EST (#)
Rating: 2

well, i mean it was a self-admitted alter and you then made a worthless hate post about the guy that got banned, so i could see the logic behind him banning the super account as well...

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 19:53:20 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Yeah, that TOp Ten list will never get finished now.

#4 Britney Skye
#3 Eva Angelina (oh lordylordylordylordy)
#2 Monica Sweetheart
#1 Jenna Haze



OH well...

Submitted by wardy at 2006-03-26 19:24:58 EST (#)
Rating: 2

he banned super too? that sucks for him... bummer... dot dot dot...

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 19:10:39 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Um, thanks Bubba.

I'm not ashamed of what I've done in my life.
Now, I'm not proud by any stretch of the imagination, but I've never been ashamed.

I still go to support groups for survivors at least once a month. From those groups, in the past six years, at least seven more people have tried and succeeded on the second try.

One thing I've learned, and this is just strictly from an educational standpoint, most suicides that fail are attempt by OD. And of those who OD and fail, then try again, the most popular form is a gun. Very few people jump anymore.

But again, thanks. I don't really expect many people to change their minds about me. I am who I was three days ago, and I'll be the same guy three days and three years from now.

I don't like to harp on the fact I'm a bit developmentally disabled, it's not really a lifetime killer. In the outside world, I act pretty much like a normal person, albeit one who jumps from subject to subject when I'm in groups. When I know I'm with people who accept me for how I act and who I am, I really loosen up and have fun. But most of the time, I just don't feel totally comfortable with myself. It's kind of strange. I can think and theorize and imagine and understand like I should, but I'm kind of emotionally jacked up when it comes to people and relationships.

Bah, anyway. I'm rehashing years of therapy here that I only mostly understood in the first place.

So anyway. Did you know Bart suspended SomeTypeOfSuper, too?

Submitted by Bubba2341 at 2006-03-26 18:31:28 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Anyone with an IQ above 12 who reads this and the reviews will look
at JayPeg in a whole different light. Of course, that deletes 90%
of the Fuckwads here. . . :)

Submitted by wardy at 2006-03-26 18:15:50 EST (#)
Rating: 2

i think your picture is upside down or something...



as far as suicide goes, your thoughts on this subject are brilliant and provacative. i would think that the catholic church wouldn't view it as a suicide because that probably wasn't their intent when they jumped. they were jumping because they didn't want to die and the remote possibility of surviving the fall. that's the only question i'm going to answer right now because i'm really busy doing absolutely shit.



love,

wardy.

Submitted by Bubba2341 at 2006-03-26 18:01:06 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2006-03-25 23:10:22 (#)
Ranking: 1

It's been mentioned before here on Uber that I'm on truck loads of psy meds. This is true. I have a ceratonin imballance that results in severe Bi-Polar Disorder type I with rapid cycles. One of the meds I'm actually on is for people with eplipsey. They've found it helps control the ceratonin levels in my body. I'm on SSDI because I can't work without the meds and with the meds, I sleep 10 hours a night, plus 2-3 naps during the day. However, I'm still productuve and try to achieve the most I can. I would love to have a magic pill that I could take that would make me all better.

That being said...

I have contemplated suicide before when I'm in depression swings, but never attempted. Fortunately, my depression swings are not very long or very strong. It's the mania swings that are a concern. Personally, I'm much more concerned about homocide.
_____________________________________________
Hey! I've never even pissed you off. You don't live in Colorado, do you?
If so. I live in Eastern Yupistan... :)

Submitted by pragmatic at 2006-03-26 17:46:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

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Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-03-25 15:37:51 (#)
Ranking: 2

i don't think a suicide troubles themselves over their family and friends for a number of reasons.

first, if you are feeling so shitty that you want to kill yourself, you are probably so self-obsessed, that you can't think outside your own problems.

second, i'm sure many suicides convince themselves that everyone would be better off if they died.

third, even where they might consider their family's reaction, they probably think, "they can't imagine what i'm going through, if they did they would understand" and head straight to the pills.
-----------------------------------------------
I think most suicides never talk about the way they're feeling. They can't think clearly, they can't see any other option, and having not discussed it with anyone else, they just can't see any escape.

Submitted by ih8u2man at 2006-03-26 10:48:03 EST (#)
Rating: 2



2. How could you justify the inevitable pain caused by your death to your friends and family? Did you even consider them? Having been a griever, I find ETS's flippant 'it must be very inconvenient' comment a touch insulting. Yes mate, it IS fucking inconvenient and maybe if people truly realised the amount off pain and damage such an act causes to such a large group of people then they might try and think of some other way to alleviate their pain.



A friend of myne killed themselves by jumping last week. It was the most painful experience.

He was 21.

No one knows why, but it doesn't matter. He's gone and I will never be able to say goodbye.

I miss him. I wonder if he knows.

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 10:36:28 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Just now reading the reviews. I'll go point by point, and offer my view about my try. And I apologize ahead of time for not naming who each part was from. If it was you, you know you wrote it, and that's good enough.

1) "I'd call the actual step by step performance mechanical rather than rational."
In an odd way, it's both. I knew exactly what I was doing, and in my mind I had a perfect and clear rationalization for it. But at the same time, by that point, I felt I could not stop, so it had a cold mechanical feeling about it.

2) "...I think it's extremely cold for people to look at that and say "well, fuck them, they were stupid."
Gaining a bit of new respect here. I always thought it was stupid to try it until I did. Now I know it is, but I won't say it.

3) "first, if you are feeling so shitty that you want to kill yourself, you are probably so self-obsessed, that you can't think outside your own problems."
I was able to. I just lacked the basic emotion of caring.

4) "second, i'm sure many suicides convince themselves that everyone would be better off if they died."
I did think that. I thought how my parents wouldn't have to live knowing their son wasted his life in school, and how my sister and brother wouldn't have to be ashamed of me for things I did as a kid, stuff like that.

5) "third, even where they might consider their family's reaction, they probably think, "they can't imagine what i'm going through, if they did they would understand" and head straight to the pills."
Didn't think that. I expected their reaction to be the same as mine. 'Well, he was pretty fucked up, it was the best way out.'

6) "if for some reason they survive, i'd imagine they'd still want to kill themselves, just because they don't want to live as the nutcase in the family."
Thought about it for about 5 seconds when I came to. Then I saw that my family loved me, and it didn't matter. Every once in a while, my Dad still goes to my suport group with me, 6 years after the fact, in case any parents need someone to talk to who's been through it.
Did I mention my Dad kicks all amounts of ass?

7) "I love life, but I'm not afraid to die."
That is the dumbest comment I've ever hear from someone who has "attempted" suicide. I'm scared to death of dying. I'm not phobic or anything, and I don't shy away from dangerous things or anything like that. I am afraid that people will be hurt by my passing, natural or un-natural causes. I caused enough pain in my family throughout my life, one thing that scares me more than anything is causeing more.

8) "...Just visiting this site you get an idea of what people honestly think about suicide; after setting all emotion aside, it really just looks like a dick move. "
I'm sorry you see it that way. It's not a "dick move" It's something most atemptee's do when they can not clearly think of any other logical course. In my case, I was so bitter at myself for ruining a life that I had been working towards since I was 7 years old, I couldn't stand myself. And every time I tried to make something right, either it backfired, or I subconciously boobytrapped it. After almost 18 months of just sinking further and further down into the hole, and watching all my friends from HS making it through college, I started to really go nuts beating myself up. Eventually, during a depressive phase, a few things happened all at once, and I was so out of control inside my head, the only way I could see to clear things up was to quiet every voice.
Stupid? Shit yeah. "dick move"? Nah.

Anyway, if anyone feels a need to hear my story, shoot me an e-mail. I'll warn you though, because of the nature of the story, it's very self-centered and if you haven't been through it, a bit of it won't make any sense. Shit, nowadays I think about it, and I can see how irrational it was.

So yeah.

Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys at 2006-03-26 10:29:59 EST (#)
Rating: 1

To be quite genuine when i fell ill I never seriously contemplated killing myself. Then just before my third roundof chemo I thought about killing myself, the second round had almost been too much. The feeling passed pretty quickly but it was there.
I cant even imagine doing it now.

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 07:06:29 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Spam, to be totally honest, I stopped caring what personal info people use against me here.

I'm not really too shy about sharing personal experience if it gives someone some clarity, or if it helps someone solve their own problems.

But thanks.

Submitted by Spam at 2006-03-26 06:58:41 EST (#)
Rating: 0

well Mr Greening, you have certainly gone up in my estimation, considering the amount of flack that you're getting recently, it takes some measure of balls to write that about yourself knowing full well that other will certainly take advantage of the information.

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 03:09:42 EST (#)
Rating: 0


I have contemplated suicide before when I'm in depression swings, but never attempted. Fortunately, my depression swings are not very long or very strong. It's the mania swings that are a concern. Personally, I'm much more concerned about homocide.

-------

So true.

At least on the depression swings, in my case, I can sort of see them coming and I make sure I'm either around someone I know or something like that. The manic swings are fucking SCARY, because all of a sudden, BAM I go from normal everyday me to either the most annoyingly energetic person around, or I get so angry I almost can't function.

And I only have a mild case. I can only imagine what you go through.

Submitted by piowufbhwervnerfnc at 2006-03-26 01:50:14 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Won't rate positive or neagtive.

Six and ahalf years ago, I had reasons for my attempt which, at the time, made all the sense in the world.

My bi-polar disorder was also undiagnosed at the time, and that played a very large part in it.

What really scares me about it to this day was that I was SO depressed and had SUCH a self loathing that I didn't care if making myself "feel better" was going to make anyone feel worse.

It did not come into play that my sister and my brother and my parents would be devistated.

I was lucky. That night, when I swallowed god knows how many pills, my Dad wasn't able to sleep. He heard me hit the floor when I slumped out of the chair (my bedroom was right next to my parent's) he knocked, wanted to know if I was OK, and when there was no answer, he opened the door, and saw me slumped on the floor. I had already lost conciousness (sp?) and if he hand't stuck his finger halfway down my throat and made me puke up god knows how much was in my stomach, I would have died, no matter what the paramedics did.

I woke up 18 hours later, and I saw my father, mother, stepmother, brother, sister, three cousins, two aunts and uncles and my grandma sitting in the room.

When I looked around and groaned, they all swarmed around me and hugged me.
ONLY then did I realise that suicide was the dumbest thing I could have done.


And, a little aside for all of this, which I know quite a few people will get a rise out of, and if they want to give me shit, I don't care.

That attempt basically stunted any mental development from that point on. Yeah, I'm 26. Yeah, I can live on my own, I can take care of myself and I can BE an adult. But emotionally and somewhat developmentally, I'm going to be a 19 year old kid for as long as Im alive.
This is also why I'm a bit connective with people. I am so scared of being alone, and not having anyone I can talk to that it's a bit debilitating at times.

So that's that.
It's way too much TMI, I know. And I'm sure there will be people who use it to insult me and to make fun of me and whatever.
Don't care.

Submitted by kaos-king at 2006-03-25 23:10:22 EST (#)
Rating: 1

It's been mentioned before here on Uber that I'm on truck loads of psy meds. This is true. I have a ceratonin imballance that results in severe Bi-Polar Disorder type I with rapid cycles. One of the meds I'm actually on is for people with eplipsey. They've found it helps control the ceratonin levels in my body. I'm on SSDI because I can't work without the meds and with the meds, I sleep 10 hours a night, plus 2-3 naps during the day. However, I'm still productuve and try to achieve the most I can. I would love to have a magic pill that I could take that would make me all better.

That being said...

I have contemplated suicide before when I'm in depression swings, but never attempted. Fortunately, my depression swings are not very long or very strong. It's the mania swings that are a concern. Personally, I'm much more concerned about homocide.

Submitted by Stin at 2006-03-25 23:03:18 EST (#)
Rating: 2

From a personal level, I let it all go before I tried to off myself (the most recent time). I borrowed a shedload of money which I will be paying back for some time to come. I didn't actively want to die - I didn't actively want to do anything. I just wanted not to be.

I could go on, but for the sake of brevity and not descending into a cesspool of lousy memories right now, I'll stop.

As Filthy said, you're being too rational about something which really isn't.

Submitted by Davros at 2006-03-25 20:51:24 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Jamaica? No she wanted to.

Sorry I have nothing of note to add.

-Dave

Submitted by PokeyPecker at 2006-03-25 19:59:20 EST (#)
Rating: 0

Through early morning fog I see visions of the things to be
The pains that are withheld for me I realize and I can see . . .
That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

I try to find a way to make all our little joys relate
Without that ever-present hate but now I know that its too late,

and . . .That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

The game of life is hard to play. Im gonna lose it anyway.

The losing card Ill someday lay so this is all I have to say.

That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

The only way to win is cheat and lay it down before Im beat,

and to another give my seat for thats the only painless feat.

That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

The sword of time will pierce our skins it doesnt hurt when it begins

But as it works its way on in the pain grows stronger . . . watch it grin, but . . .
That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.

A brave man once requested me to answer questions that are key
'Is it to be or not to be' and I replied 'oh why ask me?'
That suicide is painless it brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please.
And you can do the same thing if you choose

Submitted by MandaPanda at 2006-03-25 19:36:57 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I like the way you think about suicide vs. letting it all go.

I can't answer any of your questions because I just don't know.

Submitted by DCWoody at 2006-03-25 17:50:00 EST (#)
Rating: 2

"But the thing is, the two people I have known that have taken this route"

Two!? You ever think maybe its you?.


And in answer to you I figured the same thing about no consequences and killed three people.

This is of course a joke, and no way will it hold up in court.

And I'm still here, there is always a choice.

Submitted by Sockster at 2006-03-25 17:32:12 EST (#)
Rating: 0

I couldn't decide if I wanted to give you a +1 or a -1.

Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome at 2006-03-25 16:41:33 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-03-25 15:55:01 (#)
Ranking: 2

for anyone who calls suicide a selfish act...they're right.

however, it's just as selfish to make someone live when they don't want to. you're making them suffer through their misery for your own benefit. granted, i'd try to stop anyone i knew from committing suicide, but i'd be hypocritical to say they were the selfish ones.

-----------------

I agree with this too... Hence that sarcastic comment on my post.

Submitted by Istaros at 2006-03-25 16:04:53 EST (#)
Rating: 0

"Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-03-25 15:53:55 (#)
Ranking: 2

I think everyone has thought of suicide once or twice, but I believe it's a lame-ass way out for people who don't have the will to face their problems."

this

Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle at 2006-03-25 16:04:01 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2006-03-25 15:55:01 (#)
Ranking: 2

for anyone who calls suicide a selfish act...they're right.

however, it's just as selfish to make someone live when they don't want to.
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Thats right, forcing one to live when they don't want to is also selfish. I will admit I have thought about killing myself a few times, everyone has. It as simple as a sadness from the loss of a love to just having a shitty life. The only reason I never did it was "selfish". I WANTED TO LIVE, but I'm not going to tell someone what they can and can not do with THEIR life.

Submitted by pen_name at 2006-03-25 15:55:01 EST (#)
Rating: 2

for anyone who calls suicide a selfish act...they're right.

however, it's just as selfish to make someone live when they don't want to. you're making them suffer through their misery for your own benefit. granted, i'd try to stop anyone i knew from committing suicide, but i'd be hypocritical to say they were the selfish ones.

Submitted by MrSparkle847 at 2006-03-25 15:53:55 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I think everyone has thought of suicide once or twice, but I believe it's a lame-ass way out for people who don't have the will to face their problems. Whenever I think of how great it would be to die and leave all my shit behind, I remember how much more of a pussy it would make me. Just visiting this site you get an idea of what people honestly think about suicide; after setting all emotion aside, it really just looks like a dick move.

Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle at 2006-03-25 15:52:24 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2006-03-25 14:54:54 (#)
Ranking: 2

Interesting, although I'm sure it will turn into a shitstorm somewhere down the line.

I think the problem is you're trying to impose a rational response onto an irrational situation. Anyone genuinely planning suicide (and I say planning because actually plotting the whole thing out is a lot different from just a 'I wish I was dead' moment of misery) is no longer behaving rationally.

I personally see it as an act of desperation - that someone can't or doesn't know how to fix the situation that is haunting them. I suspect almost all suicide victims spend a great deal of time on the pain that they will inevitably cause those around them, and I guess it comes down to weighing that pain up with their own. Unless of course they have become so isolated that they don't truely believe anyone cares enough about them to be hurt.

Yes, of course it's selfish. But then isn't expecting someone to continue living a life that they no longer want or can cope with because of the pain it would cause you for them to die selfish too? I don't know - my jury is out on that one.
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Exactly. You can't say someone it selfish for commiting suicide, because its not like their getting anything out of doing. By saying that they were selfish would imply that they were receiving some type of reward. Often the reason most people who want to commit suicide but don't is that they don't want to hurt the people around them. You are trying to impose rational thought on a person who isn't thinking rationally (as FilthyAssistant stated). They don't see that they will hurt those around them. I'm giving a +2 just for trying to tackle the issue.

Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome at 2006-03-25 15:52:22 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Agreed.

I'd rather die making a difference in the world than die needlessly and selfishly. Now, that is. It wasn't always so.

There was a time I didn't think I really owed anyone anything. I wouldn't have given a shit whether they understood or not. But I've changed a lot since then.

Now I'd rather just start a revolution.

I love life, but I'm not afraid to die. http://www.ubersite.com/m/85742#1901326

Submitted by Still-Life at 2006-03-25 15:50:46 EST (#)
Rating: 2

#1
Never did, never wanted to. It wasnt about effecting others or going out with a bang, it was about 'helping' myself.

#2
I wouldn't try to justify my pain. I've considered many times before (and had multiple attempts) yet in essence there is no reason other than for myself- so I would not have to live on through agony in one form or another.

#3
At the time it wasnt a mistake. I've been in several 'bad places' in my life so far and when in such a rut it is particularly hard to get out of it. It was a bad idea now, because I've found at least a reason to live since then, just a best friend and a girl, but other than that my life is pretty inconsequencial.

#4
After having my plans revealed and being talked down by the only two important people in my life I decided that the pain I would cause those two wouldn't be worth the ending of my life over something so small.

#5
I have no clue. Anything besides fleeing the building on foot would have been 'suicide' in essence.. but I wouldn't blame them for doing what they did. It was very unfortunate.

#6
Not a clue here, either.


I just wanted to point out that suicide is in fact very selfish- I wont deny that. I can't deny it. But sometimes there are holes that not even the strongest can dig themselves out of.

Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle at 2006-03-25 15:41:11 EST (#)
Rating: 0

my comment on the post your reffering to
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Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle (user info) at 2006-03-24 19:56:06 (#)
Ranking: +2

Submitted by BadAssJulie (user info) at 2006-03-24 19:38:54 (#)
Ranking: -2

Submitted by sizzlemctwizzle (user info) at 2006-03-24 19:24:09 (#)
Ranking: +2

Life isn't a car. You can't compare the value of one life to the value of another. Life only has value to the person that lives it.
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Ugh, the whole point of my response was that you should appreciate your life and realize how lucky you are that things aren't worse for you instead of slitting your wrists because your girlfriend broke up with you or jumping off a bridge because your little brother has a better job than you. People need to deal with the shit they're handed without bitching about it or taking the easy way out.
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Yeah I completly agree and I don't condone suicide. Recently a kid at my school commited suicide. I didn't know him at all. I have never even seen him. But then I heard a couple of teachers talking about how tough it is on the family, basicly what you said, and how he was just thinking of himself when he did it. They completly forgot how much shit he was probably going through in order to want to take his own life. Of course he shouldn't have killed himself, but you couldn't call him selfish for doing so, the only person he realy let down was himself.

Submitted by pen_name at 2006-03-25 15:37:51 EST (#)
Rating: 2

i don't think a suicide troubles themselves over their family and friends for a number of reasons.

first, if you are feeling so shitty that you want to kill yourself, you are probably so self-obsessed, that you can't think outside your own problems.

second, i'm sure many suicides convince themselves that everyone would be better off if they died.

third, even where they might consider their family's reaction, they probably think, "they can't imagine what i'm going through, if they did they would understand" and head straight to the pills.



if for some reason they survive, i'd imagine they'd still want to kill themselves, just because they don't want to live as the nutcase in the family.

Submitted by Still-Life at 2006-03-25 15:34:07 EST (#)
Rating: 0

The main reason I attempted suicide was not the thought of having 'nothing to lose' but rather that I did not want to go in with my life the way I was leading and that I was powerless to change it. I had alot of emotional problems at the time and I could not escape, regardless of what I tried. So the best idea on the table was to end myself so I wouldn't feel anything at all.

Pretty logical to me.

Submitted by Spam at 2006-03-25 15:33:10 EST (#)
Rating: 0

indeed.

Submitted by FilthyAssistant at 2006-03-25 15:13:09 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2006-03-25 15:00:49 (#)
Ranking: 0

a good point Filthy although have you considered that the whole plotting part may actually be when you are the most rational?

I mean, there seems to be a kind of cold rationality to the idea of 'So I'm going to kill myself. Now... how best to do this?' and then actually going through it step by step

===

Yes and no. I'd call the actual step by step performance mechanical rather than rational. I would expect that once that decision to die had genuinely been made (something that I really don't think happens in the majority of cases - I think most actual suicides are suicide 'attempts' that went too far because the person was drunk or fucked up or whatever), then there would come a kind of numb relief, an autopilot that would carry you through the purchase of the gun or the razorblades and so on.

Perhaps it is rational, I don't know. One thing I am sure of though is that it's relatively easy to 'attempt' suicide - it's pretty damn hard to actually see it through. For someone to actually carry it out to completion says to me that something was very, very wrong and I think it's extremely cold for people to look at that and say "well, fuck them, they were stupid."

Submitted by PokeyPecker at 2006-03-25 15:11:39 EST (#)
Rating: 2

I'm all for suicide. I think you should all go kill yourselves.

Submitted by Spam at 2006-03-25 15:00:49 EST (#)
Rating: 0

a good point Filthy although have you considered that the whole plotting part may actually be when you are the most rational?

I mean, there seems to be a kind of cold rationality to the idea of 'So I'm going to kill myself. Now... how best to do this?' and then actually going through it step by step

Submitted by PokeyPecker at 2006-03-25 14:58:44 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Eh. That was in poor taste.

But whenever I see that photograph all I can think that *I* would be thinking is that "I'm free."

40% of all suicide attempts are alcohol-related.

60% of all suicide attempts are asshole-related.

Submitted by PokeyPecker at 2006-03-25 14:56:05 EST (#)
Rating: 2

It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's....


Submitted by FilthyAssistant at 2006-03-25 14:54:54 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Interesting, although I'm sure it will turn into a shitstorm somewhere down the line.

I think the problem is you're trying to impose a rational response onto an irrational situation. Anyone genuinely planning suicide (and I say planning because actually plotting the whole thing out is a lot different from just a 'I wish I was dead' moment of misery) is no longer behaving rationally.

I personally see it as an act of desperation - that someone can't or doesn't know how to fix the situation that is haunting them. I suspect almost all suicide victims spend a great deal of time on the pain that they will inevitably cause those around them, and I guess it comes down to weighing that pain up with their own. Unless of course they have become so isolated that they don't truely believe anyone cares enough about them to be hurt.

Yes, of course it's selfish. But then isn't expecting someone to continue living a life that they no longer want or can cope with because of the pain it would cause you for them to die selfish too? I don't know - my jury is out on that one.

Submitted by Sphagnum at 2006-03-25 14:25:03 EST (#)
Rating: 2

Too drunk to read it.

Submitted by Spam at 2006-03-25 14:24:42 EST (#)
Rating: 0

I feel a little sick every time I look at that photo.


I want to share something with you -- the three little sentences that will
get you through life. Number one, `Cover for me.' Number two, `Oh, good
idea, boss.' Number three, `It was like that when I got here.'

-- Homer Simpson
One Fish, Two Fish, Blowfish, Bluefish