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The BOSH Man! SAVES THE DAY!!!

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 12:19:57 EDT
Rating: 1.56 on 63 ratings (63 reviews) (Review this item) (V)

So there I was walking down the street minding my own business when all of a sudden I stopped some random dude and told him about how fuckin bosh I was. He opened his eyes real wide and started nodding in agreement. This went on for 3 days. Eventually, he nodded in agreement so hard his head fell off. Some chick took one good look at what happened and shit her pants/exploded. I just lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement.

I went to take the GMATs and got a perfect score. All kinds of colleges were offering me money to enroll in their university, but do you think I need that shit?

Yea right.

I just took a dump in their scholarship letters and mailed it to the dean. I heard some places were so scared/confused about this they shut down their operations and opened up a hot dog stand in Boise.

I hopped on my moped and started doing cock push-ups while doing wheelies when all of a sudden I ran over some dude’s prize winning Doberman.

“Hey man that dog was a faggot anyways, lets go bang Scruggs’ mom.. that would really save the day"

This dude was obviously mondo bosh. I gave him a high 5, top gun style (where you give a high 5 and then continue your forward momentum and give him a backwards 5 in the same motion) and lit up 4 cigarettes. I shoved 2 up the doberman’s ass and told him to fuck off. If he was still alive, he would have listened.

For the sake of argument, we’ll call this dude Colonel Beefhawk.

Colonel Beefhawk had a pretty bosh idea about opening a restaurant that served waterproof tacos. It was such a bosh idea I did a cartwheel.

Sure enough, we made like $53 big ones that day and got all the waterproof tacos we wanted. I built a cannon powered by the riffs of Molly Hatchet and slung waterproof tacos and sharky balls at Scrugg’s house until the dawn of time.

The Kid who Knows Everything came out of left field and started clapping excitedly.

I just lit up a cigarette and nodded in agreement.



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Submitted by scourge at 2007-08-30 14:36:26 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-08-04 12:46:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 0


Submitted by mattnotharry at 2006-08-02 17:54:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Colonal Beefhawk.

Need I say more.

Submitted by poisonyourkids at 2006-08-02 17:30:54 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

hahahaha, amazing. "modo bosh" i havent heard that since i used to wear jam shorts and wheel around on my nash skateboard. you know, the kind that are squared off in the back and skinny in the middle and come to a rounded point in the front.

i do top gun high fives all the time and they are so rad that the sun sets as soon as we do it just in time for cru jones to pull off a gnarly 360 on his BMX across the sunset in the background and then the whole world just freeze frames while a couple seconds of the song "youre the best around" from the karate kid play and fade out.

then it all just goes back to normal though.

Submitted by beeltea at 2006-08-01 07:02:03 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'm sorta ashamed, but I read all your posts. I wish I could be bosh.

Submitted by Gunslinger at 2006-07-27 20:10:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Damn, I missed this boshness!!

I watched all the Starwars movies...it took 20 hours...SHUT UP

Submitted by SPECIALk at 2006-07-26 01:20:19 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

"The Kid who Knows Everything came out of left field and started clapping excitedly."

Totally bosh.

Submitted by Antioxident at 2006-07-25 20:46:59 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

BOSH

Submitted by kaos-king at 2006-07-25 19:45:19 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

This was almost as Bosh as that time you bitch slapped the entire nation of Sri Lanka at once...

Submitted by chipolatte at 2006-07-25 16:18:37 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

you're like the ninja kid from real ultimate power.

Submitted by JonnyX at 2006-07-25 16:12:59 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I cant believe I'm saying this, but this post needs more BOSH!

Submitted by Sphagnum at 2006-07-25 15:16:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Submitted by Maltese at 2006-07-25 15:02:02 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Auto +2 for the BOSH man.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 14:42:00 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

way bosh

Submitted by Whiplash at 2006-07-25 14:38:14 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

its becoming repetitive
its still funny, but its becoming unsurprising and could very well become obnoxious

still bosh though

Submitted by awesome_face at 2006-07-25 14:07:42 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

lol water proof tacos?

WTF?

Submitted by leilani at 2006-07-25 14:04:30 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

BOSH

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:53:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

20-8


thats kinda like 10-4 ..but twice as bosh.

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2006-07-25 13:49:23 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I never said murdering was bad.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:45:41 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

jeanannenanennenanananananu


I dunno if you got the memo.. but that doberman was a pice of crap anyways

Submitted by Fucking foul at 2006-07-25 13:37:12 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

murderer

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:36:40 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Forensibosh - probably!

we're pretty much the only people that make them..

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2006-07-25 13:35:01 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I bet my hospital uses Boshman's company's lazers.

Submitted by Yams at 2006-07-25 13:24:53 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

You lead an exciting life.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:19:01 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

clearly

Submitted by UnderOathMeal at 2006-07-25 13:17:39 EDT (#)
Rating: 1

This post was way bosh.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:12:22 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

And I hope when you say cabinet you mean male harem.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:11:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I would be honored to be IN your cabinet.

Submitted by goferforhire at 2006-07-25 13:09:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 2


Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:08:36 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Merlina I get that a lot.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:07:54 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

mine is already the dicktator, but I can reserve a spot for you in my cabinet

Submitted by Merlina at 2006-07-25 13:07:35 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Every time I read you name I hear it in The Simpsons DUFF MAN! voice..

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:07:11 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I'm pretty sure our cocks would be gods there.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:06:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Sounds like a plan.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:06:16 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Except for the time I went to that men on face lovers convention.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:05:38 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

I've never seen so many men on face lovers.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:05:13 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

There's a lot of people who like men on their faces.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:04:56 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

LOOK AT ALL OF DEM!

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:04:42 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

OH SNAP!

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:04:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Don't give this a +2 if you like men on your face.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:03:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

and by that i mean we use our cocks to operate a can opener.

Then we can make a telephone using the cans to coordinate a parade of Scruggs fans to the shores of cockland


Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:03:45 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Super cereal cock.

Submitted by dove666 at 2006-07-25 13:03:41 EDT (#)
Rating: -1

Was this written when you were ascending or descending?

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:03:33 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Cock.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:03:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Super cereal.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:03:16 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Literally.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:02:48 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

My brother, http://www.ubersite.com/m/90812

There is so much cock in it. It's great.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:01:57 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

DEAL!

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:01:43 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

...And I'm spent.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 13:01:21 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

ok but we have to open them with our cocks

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:01:15 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Cowabunga dudes!

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:01:06 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

UNOPENED! OH SNAP!

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:00:52 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Let's go fuck some cans of spaghetti-o's.

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 13:00:19 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Hey Bosh Man, are YOU Jon Perry??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Submitted by The_Cyst_Master at 2006-07-25 12:59:55 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

This post saved my life.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 12:44:05 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

yea right


this post saved your day

Submitted by recall at 2006-07-25 12:40:28 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

MCAT > GMAT

Submitted by CHR15 at 2006-07-25 12:38:50 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

Good

Submitted by CaptainThorns at 2006-07-25 12:36:12 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

Meh, you've done better.

Submitted by forensicgirl3 at 2006-07-25 12:30:59 EDT (#)
Rating: 2

+2 waterproof tacos


trippy!

Submitted by Sinistral at 2006-07-25 12:27:24 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

not one of your better stories.

Submitted by DudeThatsBOSH at 2006-07-25 12:23:58 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

yea right

Submitted by professorfuckface at 2006-07-25 12:20:19 EDT (#)
Rating: 0

bosh man = lame cpt. foamy ripoff


Just squeeze your rage into a bitter little ball and release it at an
appropriate time. Like that day I hit that referee with a whiskey
bottle. 'Member that?

-- Homer Simpson
Whacking Day