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The only one "going spastic" is yourself, inside your lonely echo chamber.
Welcome to Ubersite!

Anansie (Anansie)

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Merchant:
Sir, I must strongly advise you, do not purchase this. Behind
every wish lurks grave misfortune. I, myself, was one
president of Algeria.

Homer: C'mon, pal, I don't want to hear your life story! Paw me.

Treehouse of Horror II