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Forgive me. I'm drunk, on the train home from the game. Or don't.
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Jacobi (Jacobi)

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Carpal Tunnel Syndrome? No. Lumber Lung? No. Jugglers despair?
No. Achy-Breaky Pelvis? No. Oh, I'm never going to be disabled.
I'm sick of being so healthy! Hey wait -- Hyper-Obesity. If you
weigh more than 300 pounds, you qualify as disabled.

-- Homer Simpson
King-Size Homer